dalinar belly enthusiast @isdalinarhot - Tumblr Blog

This blog is not spoiler-free. If you have not finished Stormlight, including Wind and Truth, follow at your own risk.

gonna make a pinned post

hi, I’m Luke, he/him, mid twenties if you give a shit, I have read every piece of Cosmere media I can get my grubby little hands on, I am kissing Dalinar with tongue sexy hotttt no shirts, and I make funny posts sometimes. Welcome to my crib

my main is @blackthornass ; if you see that blog reply to your posts, send you an ask, like your posts, or follow you, that’s me!

blacklist the tag #purple dragon jungle juice if you don’t want to see posts about the weird gay thing Dalinar and Sadeas had going on. here is a link to additional ship tags i use for blacklisting, along with some others thrown in just for fun

also blacklist the tag #drunkposting if you don't want to see posts that are really bad. i highly recommend not following this blog if alcohol is a trigger for you, its A Big Part Of My Life And My Posts

my posts get very nsfw at times, i try my best to tag it though. minors, feel free to follow but please do not interact with my nsfw posts if you can help it.

Spoiler tags currently in use are: #ssp5 spoilers for isles of the emberdark. for now if anyone posts on tumblr about it i'll use #ghostbloods spoilers for mistborn era 3 stuff and will update my spoiler tag once we get an actual book title for the individual books.

i write fanfic and you can read it here . also a list of the basic premises of all my stormlight fics is here because i love lists #mylists

also @ mobile users: i have an faq now

Anon asks are on for now, but they will be turned off again if people are weird to me. Please remember there is a living human being behind the screen before you start your bullshit.

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isdalinarhot

dalinar having zero memory of rathalas makes the way of kings a comedy

#dalinar expertly ragebaiting sadeas by way of completely ignoring that he did a rathalas (he forgor)#has been captivating me for the last half hour

isdalinarhot

It’s really really funny that Sadeas used Dalinar’s visions as proof he is completely fucking insane and growing senile in his old age somebody come kill this guy etc. when Dalinar actually literally has a complete inability to remember pretty much anything about 1. His dead wife 2. A career-defining battle he was general of. Dalinar was apparently so good at bullshitting through all conversations involving Evi and Rathalas that he had with Sadeas (of which im sure there were SEVERAL, like, when your buddy nuked a city-state and he starts talking about honor and the codes and shit certainly you’re gonna bring up the city-state he nuked) that he never knew and used it for blackmail. Good for Dalinar I guess

isdalinarhot

also like, the strength of cultivation's grip on dalinar's brain. absolutely insane. like we already have a passage in twok where dalinar is like "adolin has blond hair. after years and years of trying to work out how this is possible i have determined that my wife had blonde hair. maybe. i could be totally off base. maybe adolin just came out blond" so like cultivation is probably also making it so that in the first few months after dalinar visited the nightwatcher, when hes on his sober bullshit about codes and nohadon and whatever, when sadeas is regularly getting fed up and going YOU INCINERATED YOUR WIFE. I DONT CARE WHAT NOHADON SAID YOU INCINERATED YOUR DAMN WIFE. I WAS THERE. I HELPED YOU INCINERATE YOUR WIFE. and all dalinar is hearing is a wave of shshshshsh, dalinar isn't thinking. hmm. sadeas seems to be invoking my dead wife's name a lot whenever we argue about morality. maybe i was. uh. not good to her

#luke.txt #purple dragon jungle juice

It’s really really funny that Sadeas used Dalinar’s visions as proof he is completely fucking insane and growing senile in his old age somebody come kill this guy etc. when Dalinar actually literally has a complete inability to remember pretty much anything about 1. His dead wife 2. A career-defining battle he was general of. Dalinar was apparently so good at bullshitting through all conversations involving Evi and Rathalas that he had with Sadeas (of which im sure there were SEVERAL, like, when your buddy nuked a city-state and he starts talking about honor and the codes and shit certainly you’re gonna bring up the city-state he nuked) that he never knew and used it for blackmail. Good for Dalinar I guess

#luke.txt #and THAT is a skill set developed with. pulls out calculator #33 years ish of getting blackout drunk at inopportune times

Sometimes I remember that wasp cup!ialai has endometriosis simply because I needed to bullshit a reason why a woman who mostly only has sex with other women and her trans husband would be on birth control, something I made sure Ialai was on because I knew I would make Ialai and Dalinar fuck but also knew I would know myself well enough to forget condoms. And I nod appreciatively. More giving The Character gynecological bullshit that sucks eggs

#luke.txt #drunkposting

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ariiadnes

i lust for that fictional character

ceruleanheaven

[very clearly indulging the urge] im fighting the urge

#dalinar and also me from real life

laminatednewspaper

Happy pride month everyone! I don’t think any of these people know how act (based off that one onion article)

unalivejournal

always a little funny to me when filmbros are vehemently anti fanfiction but love to discuss film theories. Maybe my theory is that the 2 main guys sucked each other off. And swallowed

#this goes here

lordeboy

#this is how adolin reads to me

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when dalinar was a kid he got bullied by "well-dressed men from kholinar" and i just have to say. i think maybe that did something to him psychosexually. the whole coping with trauma through kink thing but its sadeas king of the fancy outfit being mean to him in bed

#luke.txt #purple dragon jungle juice #idk is this anything #nsfw text

taravangians-storming-balls

New yorker style comic that shows vyre shushing loud kids in a library captioned "he who quiets". Is this anything

cuartosol

🌠

chechula

Reading The Way of Kings was funny experience. I got the book recommended by two very different friends. Both of them talked to me for hours about it(each description sounded like different book) .Now reading it was just realizing: "that character is for sure favorite of my friend" "I am sure that my other friend hated this scene" "I have to introduce my friends to each other, so we can argue about ...all of it" etc....

cuartosol

szeth card i did for a stamp rally back on september! it looked great with the holo effect, see below the cut :')

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modern au Dalinar is 10 years old and he has his first crush but doesn’t do anything about it due to You Can’t Be An Openly Gay Or Bi Or Whatever 5th Grader In 1982 but anyway the crush starts dating some girl who can run really fast, faster than Dalinar even, and then Dalinar is like oh :( and then goes home and listens to his shitty cassette of Yesterday by The Beatles while staring out the window melodramatically and then after that he’s literally fine

#luke.txt #based on a true story except for me it happened 30 years later so it was on a hand me down iPod nano instead

cosmerelists

Cosmere characters, Syl and Kaladin are dating! What are you reactions?

As requested by anon. :)

WARNING: THIS POST CONTAINS WAT SPOILERS!

Previously in this series: Kaladin/Leshwi, Kaladin/Lezian, Shallan/Vin, Kaladin/Kelsier, Renarin/Rlain, Shakadolin, Shallan/Kaladin, Kaladin/Adolin, Jasnah/Shallan, and Raboniel/Navani.

1. Szeth, post Wind and Truth

Szeth: [flashback to Kaladin and Syl leaning close, laughing] Szeth: [flashback to Syl listening to Kaladin play the flute] Szeth: [flashback to Kaladin and Syl dancing] Szeth: ... Szeth: Was I the third wheel for that whole trip? Nale: Did you just notice now? [Stormfather rumbles ominously in the background]

2. Nale

Nale: This is the problem with honorspren. Nale: Once the start making oaths, they can't stop. Nale: They are oath sluts. Chana: You can't say that, man. [Stormfather rumbles ominously in the background]

3. Shallan

Shallan: Kaladin, I'm happy for you! Shallan: When did you first fall in love with her? Kaladin: Looking back... Kaladin: It was probably when she prevented my suicide by bringing me a poisonous leaf. Shallan: ... Shallan: ... Shallan: Somehow, that feels right. [Stormfather rumbles ominously in the background]

4. Bridge 4

Lopen: Nobody asked me, but if anybody had asked me to predict Kaladin's type of romance... Lopen: "His spear but also she's a lady" would have been my answer. Skar: No shot you called this. Skar: And yet... You're not wrong. Sigzil: I bet, historically, it's not that uncommon. Sigzil: There is a lot of intimacy in the Radiant bond. Vienta: I'm not dating you. Sigzil: I-I just said "not uncommon"! [Stormfather rumbles ominously in the background]

5. Rock

Rock: I can't believe a god would date a human! Rock: Sylphrena, are you--what is the Alethi phrase?--slumming it? Syl (with mock seriousness): Yes. I'm afraid I am. Kaladin: Rock, don't encourage her! [Stormfather rumbles ominously in the background]

6. Lirin & Hesina

Lirin: My son is dating his weapon. Lirin: My son is literally dating his spear. Hesina: Who happens to be a delightful young lady who makes Kaladin smile! Lirin: Yes, but--the optics. Hesina: Since when do you care about optics? Lirin: ... Lirin: You have a point. [Stormfather rumbles ominously in the background]

7. Nightblood

Nightblood: Wow... A sword dating her wielder... Nightblood: Nobody told me THAT was a possibility! Nightblood: Hey, Szeth! Can we find Vivenna again? Szeth: ...Do I want to know? [Stormfather rumbles ominously in the background]

8. Lyn

Lyn: Kaladin and I didn't date for long. Lyn: But I know he struggles with darkness. Lyn: And I know Syl is his light. Laral: But a sweet way to say "grumpy / ray of sunshine" relationship. Lyn: I-I'm trying to be the bigger person here! [Stormfather rumbles ominously in the background]

9. Adolin

[Adolin and Syl are crouched over a magazine together] Kaladin: ...Do I want to know? Adolin: Oh! Kaladin! Adolin: Now that you're finally dating someone fashionable, your life is about to change! Kaladin: ...Same question as before? [Adolin & Syl look at each other and then nod in agreement] Syl: We're talking... Adolin: Matching! Syl: Couples'! Adolin: Outfit! Kaladin: ... Kaladin: Goodbye. Adolin: Oh, he'll come around. [Stormfather rumbles ominously in the background]

10. The Stormfather

Stormfather: [rumbling ominously] Stormfather: Kaladin so-called Stormblessed, you now have multiple oaths to my daughter. Stormfather: The Radiant oath, and the oath to her heart. Stormfather: Should you dare to break ANY of these OATHS... Syl: Dad, come ON! He only almost broke an oath ONE time! Stormfather: You DARE to impede my fatherly right to threaten your boyfriend?! Syl: Oh, as if you haven't already tried to kill him! Multiple times! Stormfather: Near-murders I commit in storm mode don't count! Syl: YES THEY DO Kaladin: ... Kaladin: You know what? Kaladin: She's still worth it.

#hell yeah

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