you build me up

"yikes" isabella breathed out, placing a hand on her forhead as she tried to take in her surroundings. "i'll never understand how i manage to get myself in situations like this when i drink." she said with a slight laugh, raising her brow. "you think people are going to switch tents and stuff?" she asked with a slight shrug of her shoulders before giving the other a grateful smile as she took the other's shirt from her. "are you sure about this? i don't want you to get cold or anything.. besides, i should be able to track down my tent in a quick enough fashion that i hopefully wouldn't be seen." she explained, chewing on her bottom lip before her gaze fell to the ground. "i- thank you. i don't know why i haven't explored shirts like that before but maybe i should.. i'm not getting any younger so i might as well do it now, right?"

"really? you think someone's going to look at me and think 'yeah i'd cuddle the shit out of her' even though i'm a damn mess right now?" she asked with a small laugh, shrugging her shoulders lightly. "i have faith in you, though." isabella continued with a grin, her brow raising as she listened to hayley speak. "i'm still not so sure i believe that." she told her companion with a small shake of her head. "isn't that what you're supposed to do at things like this? or is that just something i've always thought to be the truth but it's not actually the case. but then again, look at me, i'm not much better right now so i can't really blame or judge your brother." she exclaimed, gesturing to her rather intoxicated self and state with a giggle. "yikes, not so sure i want to be around if and when that happens so i might just end up getting up before everyone else and finding somewhere to sit where i won't be anywhere near any of that. so if you're looking for me in the morning, i'll probably be on the beach or something." she laughed, scrunching up her nose slightly. "yeah, you're not wrong about that. too bad i've always been really bad with talking to guys to do anything about it." she said with a small sigh, her brows raising at the question she was asked. "for once, no. not really. i mean there's times where life is rough but i just told myself to get out of my comfort zone.. so here i am."

the slightly mischievous grin that grew on his lips caused the blush that was on her cheeks to grow more intense as she kept her eyes locked on his, something about him drawing her in. she'd always had a thing for people who were far more social and outgoing than her and well, his looks helped that too. "i- um, yes. i was. along with the rest of the band but i might have watched you the most. don't tell them that though, keep it our little secret." she told him shooting a wink in his direction before shrugging her shoulders lightly. "honestly? i don't really know what my 'style' would be and usually i'd be uncomfortable if i was out of my comfort zone, so i'm assuming that right now, i'm either still there or just don't give a fuck. or maybe i just want to be one tonight, who knows?" her words were met with an intoxicated giggle as she ran a hand through her hair to get it out of her face. but what she hadn't expected was the offer he gave her, or more so the fact she was actually thinking about saying yes. "you know what, why not. but you have to promise me you'll make sure i don't do anything stupid because between you and i, i've smoked once and i was eighteen and don't remember how i reacted." she told him with a small raise of her brow as she took the joint from him lightly, inhaling as much of the smoke as she could before exhaling. "you might just be right about that." she smirked, twirling around to show off the shirt with a laugh, making sure she did so slowly enough that her whole ensemble could be seen. "i think the fact that it's your shirt helps that, if i'm being honest." she replied, a small smile pulling on her lips as he came closer to her. it was such a small motion but it was enough to make her heart skip a beat, his words only making it worse. "i'm glad you think that i'm considered 'classy and proper' but i'd just like you to know that even if i come off like that, that's not how i want people to act around me." she told him quietly, placing her hand on his chest. "besides, i wouldn't be getting outside of my box if i let words like that have a negative effect, would i?"

isabella couldn't help but to giggle at his reaction, her brows raising slightly as she watched his gaze fall, rising as quickly as it had fallen. "it's okay to look, i can't really be mad at you when i'm the one sitting in this tent half dressed." she told him with a shrug of her shoulders. "do you think either of them would mind if i happened to borrow something just until i'm either sober enough to remember where the heck my tent is or figure it out while i'm as drunk as i am?" she asked, shaking her head lightly. "i- uh. i'm sorry that you waltzed in on me in the state that i am considering you've not seen me like this before. however, i will say, you're handling it rather well given the situation that's going on before you." she laughed, nodding her head lightly. "that might be a good option, since i don't want you to not look at me anymore."

"honestly, i commend you on that because i've never had the confidence to wear anything less than what i have on. which means yes, i'm one of those people who still wears a one piece to the beach or pool." she explained, raising her brow at the compliment. "i- well then. thank you, i'd tell my mom you said that but she isn't around so i'll just internalize it and keep it there." she laughed, shaking her head at her own comment before grabbing the drink from the other, taking a swig from it before handing it back over. it probably wasn't something isabella really needed, but it was offered and she figured why not? how much worse could she really get before the night was over? "you wanna know the problem i have with alcohol? it makes me more thirsty, so i drink more and more and then i end up getting trashed and in this state." she said, gesturing to herself. "a crop top? i haven't owned one of those in years." isabella admitted, her brow raising as she watched the other pull out a shirt that she'd probably never actually own in her lifetime but again, why not? "you think this will grab people's attention?" she asked with a slight smirk, pulling the shirt over her head before twirling around to show it off.

the beach wasn't a place where isabella could be seen all that often, meaning that her actually coming to the carnival was a bit of a surprise to herself. she'd usually be locked away in her apartment, her laptop placed upon her lap as she worked while everyone else had fun. but this time, she decided she needed to go out, needed to be one of the people who was having fun.. needed to make friends because she wanted to. so she packed a few things and before she knew it, she was settled into a tent full of people who probably had no idea who she was but with the amount of alcohol coursing through her veins, she couldn't really find it in her to care. she was having a good time, and that's what mattered. or well, that's what mattered until she realized she maybe wasn't in her tent. "believe me, our secret is safe with me. could you imagine someone walking in to me ripping my shirt off in their tent? god, that just makes me want to find something to wear or get the hell out of here." she told the other with a drunken giggle. "do you think someone would notice if i maybe... borrowed a shirt just until i found my own tent?"

"you're a blessing, honestly." isabella replied, giving hayley a grateful smile as she tried to pull herself together somewhat. unable to really do so due to the amount of alcohol she'd already consumed earlier that evening. she'd said she wanted to have fun at the carnival, so fun was what she was trying to have.. no matter how she did so. "i mean, i'm not opposed to cuddling as that's one of my favorite past times but i'm not sure anyone else would really be down for that." she admitted with a shrug of her shoulders, nearly missing the shirt that was thrown in her direction. "somehow, i find that hard to believe." isa retorted, raising her brow as she threw the shirt on over her head. "if that was the case, the tent would smell like a dump and it doesn't." she pointed out a girn making it's way onto her lips before she felt her brows knit together at the question of her remembering who she was in a tent with. "um, sort of? i know a few names and i happen to know the guy who's in my tent is extremely good looking... but that's besides the point." she said as she felt a small blush creep up to her cheeks. "harlow and hadley are the names i remember because they both start with h's."

isabella was usually so careful when it came to watching the amount of alcohol she'd consumed, but tonight? she couldn't really seem to care and one drink led to another and eventually the total got to be a number she couldn't even count on her fingers. which is what led her to spilling the drink she'd claimed to be her last all over her shirt and in turn led her into a tent that was most certainly not hers. a minor detail she'd noticed after getting half undressed. "shit- i- um, i'm sorry." she blurted out, taking a deep breath to try and stop her head from spinning. "honestly? i'm drunk and i didn't know where i was going and this tent was open but uh- i recognize you. you drum for the band that played, right? you um- did really good." she told, eyeing him over before her gaze was brought down to the shirt that was in his hands. "not exactly my style, but i told myself i was getting outside of my box tonight, so for tonight, it just might be my style." she told her, a smirk growing on her lips as she pulled the shirt on over her head. "thank you, by the way. you might just be my knight in shining armor tonight." isabella told him playfully, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "now, since this shirt is yours.. what i need to know is if you think i could pull this style off, even if it's just for tonight or if you think i should just go back to what i was in."

getting out of the house wasn't a bad thing, isabella knew that. and in fact, all she could hear was her parents telling her that getting out of the house was good for the soul playing in a loop in her head when she'd first found out about the bonfire / carnival. so, even though she was more of the sit at home type, she decided she needed to get out of her comfort zone ever-so-slightly.. the bonfire being the start of all of that. but what she hadn't expected was to drink as much as she had, and as fast as she had. leaving her in an intoxicated state that she hadn't been in years. yes, she drank and there were a lot of times she'd gotten buzzed from it. but she hadn't been this drunk in forever, a feeling that she actually greeted with open arms because what better of a way to get out of your comfort zone than to be as drunk as she was? "why are you sorry?!" she asked almost instantly, a small giggle escaping from her lips as she tried to collect herself. "i'm the one who should be sorry. i'm a damn mess right now and i've only got myself to blame. not to mention the fact i don't even know who's tent this is and yet here i stand, without a shirt. i promise you i'm not this much of a mess when i'm sober." she blurted out, shaking her head.. mostly at herself before she gave the other a small smile. "well, welcome to the party, glad to be one of the first things you see here." isabella laughed, taking the jacket the other had handed her with a grateful smile. "thank you, so much. i know i told myself i wanted to get out of my comfort zone, but i'm not sure i'm completely ready for running around the beach half naked. maybe after a few more drinks.. who knows."

"wow- hello to you too. this is a bit awkward and i'm sorry you have to see me like this right now." isabella blurted out, giving the other a small nod of her head. "i think anything would be better than walking around in just a bra? not that there's anything wrong with that but it's totally not me.." she explained, giving the other a thankful smile as she gently took the tank top from her. "treasure hunt? that sounds amazing!! i should have signed up for a baking booth or something like that, but given my current state, not sure i would have been the best host in the world." she laughed, shrugging her shoulders later. "this is called the 'i decided to get off my couch and get out of my comfort zone' drunk, so if you wanna join in on that, be my guest but apparently i'm a little clingy when trashed, so that's just a fair warning."

isabella had been torn on if she should even go to the bonfire or not, finally deciding why not? but after only a few hours, she found out that she was far more lightweight than she had originally thought and somehow, she managed to spill her drink down the front of her and knew she needed to change that. luckily, though, she had quite a few spare shirts tucked away in the tent she was assigned and because of it she headed back towards the tent, pulling off her shirt without a second thought due to the alcohol coursing through her veins. but the sound of crunching sand behind her caused her to turn around in almost a panic. "i-" she started, her head tilting to the side. "now this might look bad but i do have a reason to be here." isabella continued, looking around the tend she was in. "i spilled my drink on my shirt and i- i needed a new shirt so i'm trying to find one of the spares i brought. but- now that i think about it, is this even my tent?"

“i’m not entirely sure i want to ask how you’re completely covered in flour right now as i don’t see anyone else around so i know it wasn’t some sort of food fight. however, honey, i will tell you that it doesn’t look as bad as you might think. or at least to me it doesn’t.. maybe someone else would have thought you were rolling around in drugs or something but i’m pretty sure i can tell the difference between the two. anyways, i will help you clean all of this up if you tell me what on earth it is that you were trying to make so that i can show you how to do so.”

“okay, i know it looks a little gross but it’s just because of the fact the kale chips that are in it might have dyed the noodles a weird green tint. but i promise you, it’s not bad or poisonous. i do know what i’m doing when it comes to cooking things.. i just didn’t read the fact that i wasn’t supposed to add the kale chips until after the noodles had cooled slightly because if you added them before that, they dye the noodles green.”

“i was told it was okay to come in.. i happen to live in the neighborhood and i don’t really think that we’ve talked before. and mostly that’s because i’m an awkward as hell person and i stay inside a lot. but to make up for it, i made you an apple pie as a friendly gesture and to say hello even though i might have been too shy and awkward to do so before now. if uh, i interrupted something or whatever, i can just give this to you and leave.. i never meant to do that.”

“what’s going on? that’s actually something i’d love to have the courage to ask you. i don’t know, though.. i don’t know why i get so upset seeing you with other people. i don’t know why i get the way that i do when it comes to you. that’s a lie, i do know.. but it’s not something i can help or stop even if i wanted to. i care about you, so damn much freddie. and i just wish that you- you’d see that... and you’d stop trying to push me away because all i want is for you to be happy. yes, i might get a little jealous or upset sometimes but it’s because i still want to be able to be there for you like i was when we were kids..... like you were there for me in new york when i was dumped at the altar. i just- i can’t imagine my life without you in it. i don’t want a life where you’re not around. i need you, more so than you’d ever know because you’ve been the only one who’s showed me that i have reasons to keep going. please don’t take that away from me.”