One truly sickening thing thatās become more popular with TFaWS show streaming, is people commenting about how Tonky and Buckyās dynamic wouldāve been something good in the MCU. This is gross, wrong, and conflating the dynamic of an abuser and their victim (wi//nter//iro//n) with a loving relationship built on common values (stucky).
First off, Tonky harms Bucky, physically, in one of their only one-on-one interactions. In CACW, Tony hears about how Bucky (who was brainwashed, abused, and memory wiped), killed his parents. And how does he react? Does he stop and question how he feels now? Is he angry at Steve for hiding this (understandably, as we know how Tonky acts after this) from him? Does he feel anger, pain, sadness, but control himself because heās a damn adult? No. He fights, and hurts Bucky, with intention to kill, over something he knows he couldnāt help.
Tonky strikes first, and fights a battle he knows he canāt win, out of pure, childish rage. This is the man people think would treat Bucky right, let alone understand him better than STEVE.
One more thing thatās come to light however, Tonky may not just have the power to both be physically AND emotionally abusive, but financially as well. We already knew he had potential for this from how the one woman he manages to twist into loving him, is also the one under the thumb of his employment, someone he abuses his position of power over.
Now weāve found out that not only did he not pay the Avengers, when he absolutely had the means to, but he left them when they were in hiding, abandoning what he claimed were his āfriendsā, who he then tried to get mad at in Endgame for abandoning him. Who would want to be friends with someone who kicks me to the curb the minute I donāt align with their ideals?
Tonky hears that Bucky has a different opinion from him, finds out he made a mistake in the past that wasnāt even his fault, and holds him accountable on both fronts. Heās like a right winger, mad that their authoritarian ideology doesnāt match up with their liberal friends. He pushes Bucky down, and drowns him out in the same way Hydra did every time they wiped his memory and told him who he was.