THEY'RE PUTTING ME DOWN TOMORROW!

my nanes dr. smart and my new biggest idea is a portable telephon

charlie kirk was just found dead in miami from a fentanyl overdose

your fish will DIE if it doesn't get a shot of modelo poured in its tank RIGHT NOW

taylor swift has announced she will be taking some time away from music to focus on ice cream

im recieveing reports that charlie kirk is back and has harnessed the forbidden magic to grant his new form strength greater than that of 100 men

i wad in the mario movie but nobody saw me because im good at hiding 🤭

dropped my antifa card down the sewer grate again #fuckmylife

belarus is the 36th state of the united states of america

good new american people. we have just begun a 15 billion dollars program to arm our brave troops with badass cyber katanas and really cool plasma beam rifles

my tavern got a bad yelp review sooo needless to say i am holding their family hostage ☺️

my mom was bitten by a maltese mountain shrew and she got shrew powers

myy horse was eaten by a rachnid

you should be so scared because an elephant spider is about to start attacking you

asked for a $100 coin and the bank lady got mad at me

new tf2 update they removed the heavy