in the fear

"of course that's alright!" honey nods her head as enthusiastically as she can, more than happy to help avery find the sample jars of those she's most intrigued by, honey finding herself extremely eager to hear what avery thinks of the product she's helped to make. "it's a very satisfying process," honey tells her. "i find a lot of what we do here" in the commune she means "to be satisfying, because our work is very rewarding," she explains ever so briefly. while she understands that the commune is different, and that some are frightened by differences, which can lead to aggression or distasteful reactions such as the one avery's father has to the commune - not that honey knows that that is the case for her father - honey can't imagine living in a community unlike the commune. she can't imagine filling her days with tasks unlike the ones she participates in with the commune, unsure as to how one outside of the commune find the common feelings of satisfaction and fulfilment that she gets to experience here. "there's nothing better than literally getting to taste your hard work paying off," she giggles.

watching avery react to every sample she tastes is such a treat; even when honey isn't tasting the jam herself, her hard work is paying off in the form of avery's enthusiasm and praise, and it's a such a beautiful feeling. "i'm so delighted that you like them all," honey exclaims, hopping up onto her tiptoes in excitement for a brief second. "that's right," she nods at the question about people in the commune doing different jobs, but she quickly goes on to elaborate on avery's second question. "i'm not really on jam duty a whole lot, to be completely honest, i do a lot of a bit of everything," she giggles just a little at her own unconventional wording. "some of us are brilliant - masters - at one or a few specific things, some of us have talents that are very time consuming, therefore leaving less time to help with other things or work on other tasks or projects, but i'm one a big group who does whatever we can wherever we can," she can't be sure that she's making the most sense, particularly while speaking to someone who she figures comes from a very different background, but she does her best with her explanation.

"i mean persistent, stubborn, there are always good and bad sides of things. but i see your challenge and wait to be dazzled by your wisdom." her smile softened as she looked at him, sensing that it wasn't often he heard a compliment, let alone have the opportunity to accept them. she didn't comment on it, though, just made a note in her head to tell him something she liked about him every time they hung out. and she was pretty confident they would definitely hang out again. "what's your work schedule like? next time you have a full day off let me know and i'll take it off too. we can go do something worth complaining about. see who has the biggest count by the end of the day." it sounded like both a terrible and enjoyable way to spend the day and she figured with him it could be fun.

"well that's why i'm assessing you extra strictly, you see," paulie tells her. he's not the best when it comes to being funny, or pulling out a sense of humor in a context other than a questionable or morbid situation, but it comes out a little easier in the presence of avery - a fact that he tries to ignore, in order to save himself from fleeing and never seeing her again. "i've gotta keep the bureau reputable; if we started letting anyone get involved with us then our system would be thrown completely out of whack and complaints would never have the same effect ever again," he 'warned'. "if the mall had more employees, though, then there'd be even more cars in the parking lot, and if anything i think that would only encourage them to make the spaces smaller," he countered, the look on his face making it obviously that this isn't an argument, but instead playful banter - a very foreign interaction for paulie vincent to find himself in.

"i just have so many great and wildly different complaints that it's hard to know where to begin," he teases her, but while there is a lot of honesty to what he says, he also mainly does so to stall and buy himself more time to think of the three perfect complaints to give her. "first one that comes to mind is when the weather gets that sticky kind of humid; there is no reason for my hair to react the way it does to that, and absolutely no reason why nature should be able to make me feel that gross," he shakes his head in disapproval. "my second complaint definitely has to be when people litter," he begins, building momentum, this complaint coming out faster than the last. "how hard is it really to just find a trash can? they're all over this place, and i actually think it would take me more effort to throw something on the ground than it would to put it in a trash can on my way past it," again, he shakes his head. "lastly- hm," he goes back to needing to take a second to think, and this time it genuinely is because too many come to mind. "well i guess i've gotta give it to when your sock starts falling down in your shoe; you know when it starts working its way down until it slides down your heel, and ugh, it's the worst."

paulie's instinctual reaction to avery's offer to spend a day together complaining is a positive one; while it does sound slightly terrible to give in to negativity, paulie can foresee the two of them having the greatest time in doing so. only moments later, however, his typical fear of growing close enough to someone to consider them a friend starts to kick in; he's done such a good job at distancing himself in this town, such a successful effort in avoiding real connections being made, and the feeling of wanting to divert from that is understandably a scary one. he doesn't get close to others for a reason, he should definitely reject the offer - although, as he sits and thinks about it, feigning thought over his work schedule, he supposes that spending time with somebody doesn't mean that they have to get actually close. "i don't work an awful lot," he tells her, not sure if it's the best idea, but going with it anyway. "enough to survive, of course, but other than that not too much. i usually work like five nights a week, and i almost always have wednesdays off."

Today Ocean was out for a walk after his shift at the mall, standing on Willow Bridge and admiring both the view and the bridge itself. It really was beautiful, and it just made Ocean feel peaceful. Since he hadn't seen her coming, Ocean was surprised to hear someone call his name, looking in that direction and seeing Honey coming toward him. He was both happy to see her and suddenly a little anxious at the same time. While Ocean cared very much about Honey, he was having a bit of a difficult day, and he didn't feel like having to pretend he was fine. But that was what he was going to have to do it seemed, and Ocean slipped the mask back on. "Hey Honey!" he exclaimed, smiling at his friend, who was essentially his sister. "I was just out for a walk. It's such a nice day, and this is one of my favorite places outside the commune." It was also quiet and less frequented by members of Shrike Heights than say the Central Business District or the mall, but Ocean didn't say that. What she asked him didn't surprise him at all, having expected it actually, and Ocean briefly considered making an excuse; he didn't feel like talking right now. But that wasn't fair to Honey, so Ocean just nodded, managing to smile again. "That sounds great," he answered. "It's pretty hot outside today, so I'm down for a cold drink. But I don't mind the heat either if you'd rather just go for a walk."

growing up in the commune, honey has always been able to understand and feel a wide range of emotions and feelings; her emotional intelligence, as is the norm in the commune, is well beyond her years. coming from this background, and living through this era of the shrike killers, honey would be more than understanding of any anxiety that ocean is feeling, much like how she's been able to understand that there is a change in ocean, that he's gone through something big enough to make him less himself. no matter how good ocean has been at hiding things, honey is observant enough to worry for her beloved ocean. "it's so pretty here," honey agrees with a nod. while all of the commune are so different, their own unique people who all value individuality, they pretty much all agree on the cbd being their least favorite spot in town. "how about we go for a little walk in order to get a nice cold drink?" she suggests, the closest store that they could purchase a drink from being a small walk away. honey doesn't want to force ocean into anything he's not comfortable with, but she does hope for his sake that he can confide in her, no matter what that looks like today.

honey laughs. "yes, sweet," she shakes her head with amusement. "ooh," honey has to think about the answer for a moment, because while she's biased, sure, she does believe that almost all of the flavors of jam that they have to offer are extremely tasty. "that's so hard to answer!" she tells them, laughing as she does. "the gooseberry and elderflower, perhaps," she decides.

Since he had started working at Key of Reason, Leo hadn't exactly bonded with his coworkers. It wasn't that he didn't like them because he actually did - they were actually pretty knowledgable for the most part and seemed to have a healthy respect for music. But he just wasn't the type of guy to try and make friends. Even before the accident, he'd been sort of socially awkward, finding it hard to relate to others, though he usually found his people (or at least people to hang out with). Now though, Leo didn't even think there was a reason to bother. He couldn't be the kind of friend most people wanted or needed, and honestly he often wondered why Akito put up with him. Leo knew he was surly and easily annoyed and bitter much of the time, and who wanted to be friends with that? So he'd avoided befriending any of his coworkers, not wanting to subject them to that.

However, that became difficult when you worked with someone a lot, and that seemed to be the case with Paulie. It was like they were almost always on the same shift, and Leo had to admit that the guy seemed, well, pretty cool. He didn't try to be anyone he wasn't and didn't feel the need to be nice just to get people to like him, at least not from what Leo could see. Paulie was just...well, him. Tonight they were the only ones working, putting things on shelves and just generally tidying up the store. Paulie never felt the need to fill silences, Leo had noticed, and Leo usually didn't either. So once they were done with all the things they needed to do in the store, Leo pulled the book he was reading out of his bag and leaned against the counter. For a few moments, he tried to read, but Leo kept glancing up at Paulie, and dammit, he actually wanted to talk, at least a little bit. Setting his book down, Leo asked, "So...do you think we should maybe get to know each other a little more?"

paulie doesn't let people in, he doesn't allow himself to grow close to others, nor does he allow them to grow close to him - if he can help it. he doesn't see the point; almost all of the people that paulie has loved have gotten hurt, they've died, and even if he were to grow close to another who doesn't meet the same strange fate that most paulie has bonded with have, he doesn't think it very fair to welcome somebody into a life so full of pain and emotional baggage. it's the life he's grown accustomed to; while it might be sad, paulie's experiences with death have led him to believe that this is the best possible life that he can continue to live. don't let anyone get too close - something that's easier to say than do when he's constantly rostered on to work the same shifts as the same person.

leo is a cool person, as far as paulie knows. he doesn't mind the walls that they have up - having extremely high and sturdy walls himself - and none of leo's behavior has him judging them or wondering more about them - in the nicest way possible. it's not that paulie doesn't think about him, and what his past potentially could have looked like, it's only that paulie doesn't feel the need to know more, like he might with someone more obnoxious or unlike himself. for the most part, it's comfortable to be able to work in silence with leo, but on the other hand, paulie can't help but wonder why the universe - or maybe just their managers - seem to keep on putting them together. he can't remember the last time that he was stuck in quite close proximity to another person, seeing them and being near them so constantly, and that's exactly why leo's words - while surprising that he says any at all - don't come across as strange. "d'you think so?" he asks, not hating the conversation as he has nothing else to do at all. "i mean, what do you wanna know?" he wonders. he isn't shooting leo's idea down at all, but he's also not sure how much they should share, how much matters to the other if they're going to maintain their very casual work relationship.

"alright," he nods, wondering what words are to follow after a preface like that. paulie is a sensitive person, but he's not easily offended; because of this, he's not concerned about what the other might say, but he is curious. thankfully noa doesn't make him wait on it for very long. "oh," he chuckles, thinking that her warning was slightly too much - though he knows it wouldn't have been too much for everyone. "definitely not offended," he tells her. truthfully, as paulie doesn't wish to be known well enough by anyone, it's one of the best things someone could have told him. "i wouldn't say i'm paranoid, or that i think people have anything out to get me, maybe i should even be a little more concerned," he admits. he is concerned about what's happening in town, but he feels far less fear that one might think he should. "mostly just curious. i'm loose, and just nosey."

"careful what you say, i'm like, super impressionable," marty warns, grinning tiredly. "spin it convincingly enough and you'll have me totally freaking out about whether or not i'm awake or asleep," he chuckles, and he laughs louder as apollo admits to seeing the imaginary person over at another table. "well hey, at least if you do make me lose my mind unsure of whether or not i'm asleep, i'll know i'm not going crazy all by myself," he jokes. "what's the best flavor you got? i know some people have hardcore preferences- like they always go for chocolate, or strawberry, or whatever, no matter where they go, but i think different places have different variations of each flavor, and that sometimes the chocolate is great one place but then the strawberry is better another, you know?" it's not unlike marty to ramble in a juvenile manner, but he's even more guilty of it in his extremely tired state. "uhhhh," he thinks about food. "would it be too much to ask for some hash browns at this time?"

Nick nodded, "I think I open at Tracks next Sunday, but there's always the following one or the one after that." Hope for more sleep one day lingered in his voice. While he wasn't against waking up early or getting scheduled for opening shifts, especially with how dangerous some of the closing shifts had proven to be, it would be nice to get some extra sleep in the morning for a change. It was safe to say most people who worked at the mall were probably in a similar predicament where they wanted the earliest shifts possible yet were running on fumes with how sleepless and restless their nights were.

“sounds like a wonderful plan to me!” honey smiles widely. she’s typically up bright and early each morning herself - rising with the sun, as a lot of the commune does - but she’s still no stranger to the concept of a nice, relaxing morning spent in bed, with no need to rush out anywhere in a hurry. even when the chance to sleep in doesn’t seem especially close for nick, it’s still a nice goal to work on reaching. “a morning sleep in is all the more appreciated and satisfying when you’ve been unable to have one for quite some time, anyway,” she believes. 

TJ nods, confident in his opinion. He doesn't have anything to stand on besides the trailer and the fact that both the main actors are good as far as he knows, but it looks at least interesting and different. "I think so, yeah. People who know more than me seem to be saying so, at least, and I think it looks fun." He answers. "What kinda movies do you like?" He asks.

Unaware of Paulie's thoughts on arriving early for a good spot, TJ proudly announces he's done exactly that. "I learned from my mistakes last time, lemme tell ya. Showed up with plenty of time. Plus, I made sure to park behind a convertible, so nobody's blocking my view."

paulie nods in understanding. “sounds like a fair assessment,” just as tj is trusting those who know more than him, paulie can only trust tj. it doesn’t really matter to paulie whether or not the movie will end up being a good one - though he would blindly bet on it being at least alright, if not good - as it’s not like paulie had anything better to do tonight, but still, it would certainly be nice for it to be a surprisingly good experience. “i don’t know,” he thinks about the question. “is it too broad to just say interesting movies? i’m not picky, i guess,” arguably because paulie doesn’t care enough to be, “but i don’t really like movies that feel like a waste of time because you already know what’s gonna happen the second it starts,” he shrugs. “oh yeah?” paulie respects tj caring about the event, even if he doesn’t himself. “so you’re super into films then?” he gathers. “sounds like a good spot,” he begins. “you better hope you don’t get a different sort of view, though, being behind a convertible,” what he means by this is that tj better hope he doesn’t have the front row ticket to a couple’s steamy date; paulie doesn’t have a lot of experience getting steamy with others, but funnily enough, some of his experience did take place in a drive in theater, so he understands the connotations behind a date to the drive in.