One of the great joys of being 30+ is the ability to laugh at shit that would’ve driven you absolutely WILD in a past life
*sees the bad disk horse floating about down the river*
Me:

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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
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@ink-phoenix
One of the great joys of being 30+ is the ability to laugh at shit that would’ve driven you absolutely WILD in a past life
*sees the bad disk horse floating about down the river*
Me:

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Steve: i hate the stupid outfit, i am a glorified puppet, i am a dancing monkey, and i am wearing tights, couldn’t even give me a nice cotton/nylon blend for pants
Bucky: hey, steve babe, ur umm, ur gonna be keeping that outfit right?
Steve: i have always loved the outfit, i wouldn’t want any other outfit, i’ll wear the tights all the time, i don’t even need other clothes
i got that dog in me but it's poorly socialized and i don't take it on as many walks as i should
toddler shane refusing to talk after his hockey team lose a game. yuna & david are trying to be encouraging like “bud!! you played so good!!” and shane is ignoring them while climbing into his car seat where he’s going to angrily drink his juice box and then chew on the straw.
Couldn't miss the chance

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ilya's bisexuality really is such a vital part of his character and his identity and i Do get a little bothered when people (usually normies/straight people) just refer to him as gay bc he's in love with a man....but that's just my personal feelings as a #bi person
ACTUALLY i'm adding onto this bc there's something i always notice in ep 6 that i wanna talk abt briefly, and that's yuna & david's faces when shane says "ilya likes both" - especially yuna
there's concern there. it's obvious. and it's SO common when it comes to bisexuality bc there's this huge and annoying misconception that bisexual people are unfaithful unloyal cheaters. and you can see it in her face as she processes the information that this is an immediate concern for her and for her son.
and now let's look at ilya's face
now he's concerned, because he knows he has to explain himself (which he does. he shouldn't have to but he does) and he's basically throwing out a hail mary to shane's parents that says hey, wait, no, i'm not gonna cheat on your son. i love your son. just because i'm bisexual doesn't mean i would hurt shane.
and this is something bisexual people deal with all the time btw. not just from straight people, not just from gen x & boomers, but from our own community too. it's incredibly exhausting. anyway i just notice this every time it makes my heart hurt a bit for ilya.
The original pride flag and the sewing machine it was sewn on
Writing tips:
“You feel the bulge in his pants” - implies that you are feeling some guy’s penis, may be sexy depending on context
“You feel the bugle in his pants” - implies that this guy has a military horn in his pants, invites confusing questions like why does he have that and how big are his pockets
Both options convey that he's horny
How dare you be funnier than me on my own post
all i want for 2026 is that gigantic rancid AI bubble to finally burst in such a catastrophic way that the consequences will be so good and i'll never have to see another AI generated image ever again
Like to charge, reblog to cast.
Connor Storrie in Criminal Minds: Evolution via Vulture

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[sam reid voice] gn oomfs
to be clear, Hudson Williams could kill someone in cold blood right in front of me and I would still stan
Sing it with me!!!
“we would do something serious or dramatic and then two seconds later we’d be laughing and clowning around”
#he contains multitudes
happy prideee

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minute by minute
Ilya is so lucky that Shane proposed. Ilya would have been a nervous fucking wreck for the entire day beforehand. Wake up in the morning. Look in the mirror. Today's the day. Sob. Breathe. Okay I'm good! Turn around and Shane's hair is all in his face, still asleep on Ilya's pillow. I am NOT good. Cold shower. Breakfast that Ilya does not eat. Morning jog wherein Ilya runs like someone is chasing him. Lunch that Ilya does not eat. Drive out to the cottage. Make Shane pull over because Ilya needs to dry heave on the side of the road. "Baby we don't have to drive out today if you're not feeling well." "NO WE HAVE TO." Get to the cottage. Immediately send Shane on some kind of extended fool's errand. Shane wants to stay because Ilya is SHAKING and he is so worried. "No my love I'm fine it's just the breeze off the lake haha." It's thirty fuckig degrees Celsius. Shane finally gtfo's. Yuna, David, Rose FUCKING Landry all descend to help Ilya set up. Well. Ilya is supposed to be helping but he is standing on the deck fully dissociating. Yuna brings him tea. "Are you going to throw up the tea?" "Yes probably." Yuna takes away the tea. 800 electronic tea lights on the deck. In a parallel Ilya has no way of understanding, he both puts on and takes off a suit. Yuna fixes his curls into the hockey boy quasi-mullet that magnetizes Shane's fingers to Ilya's hair and says, "Oh, you're so handsome!" Ilya cries big fat tears. David tells a story about how his proposal to Yuna almost didn't happen because David went to the hospital for heart palpitations that morning. Thank You David That Does Not Help Even Remotely. Ilya slav squats on the lawn for twenty minutes. Shane's car pulls up in the driveway and everyone hides while Ilya vibrates in the entryway. Shane has no less than thirty grocery bags hanging from his arms, still complaining about why the grocery service cancelled their delivery last minute. Ilya leads Shane and all thirty of his grocery bags onto the deck. Shane is doing his favorite thing (bitching) and his second favorite thing (Follow Ilya) so he doesn't notice his own mother tiptoing behind him collecting the grocery bags he drops like breadcrumbs. There is an Oscar-winning actress hiding under his sofa and Shane does not notice because Ilya takes him on the deck and drops to his knees and Shane is like, "Haha, right now?" and then he sees that Ilya has a look on his face like he's just been told the sun is never coming up again and he has his hands on Shane's knees and he is saying, "Shane. Please?" and Shane puts his hands on his head and says "Oh my God baby what's happening to you" as Ilya melts and melts and then from the depths of the cottage someone who sounds a lot like Shane's very own father is whispering "The ring the ring" and when he looks back down Ilya is fumbling a ring box out of his pocket. The first picture of their proposal is Shane glaring into the middle distance with a hand cradling Ilya's curls like a baby while Ilya ugly sobs into his knee.
biblically accurate ilya rozanov proposal