Merlin: You brought a date to the mission?
Meliodas: It was either this or ice skating.
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@incorrectsdsins
Merlin: You brought a date to the mission?
Meliodas: It was either this or ice skating.

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Gowther: Are you dying?
King, completely hungover: Yes
Demon King: You have darkness within you.
Meliodas: Everyone does.
Demon King: You can't ignore me forever.
Meliodas: I'm not ignoring you.
Demon King: Then what will you do with the sharp edges of your soul?
Meliodas: Chop vegetables.
I just wanna go over there, grab Diane, and kiss her. How can I kiss her and not let her know that I like her?
King, to Oslo
Meliodas: Team, assemble! Together, we'll pummel you with the power of friendship... and wrath!
Escanor: Pride!
Gowther: Lust!
Merlin: Gluttony!
Ban: Greed!
King: Sloth!
Diane: Envy!
Hawk: I thought we were the good guys?

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King: Heyy I heard you like bad boys?
King: Because I'm bad
King: At everything
Diane:
King:
Diane: oh my god please stop crying come here-
Meliodas: We're going on a trip. Get in the car, everyone.
The sins: *cheering*
Ban: Shotgun!
Meliodas: You're not getting a shotgun.
Ban: ...Okay. But I want the front seat.
King: Who took my food?! BAN!
King: That was me ten minutes ago. I was mad, but I realized that friendship's more important!
King: That was me fifteen seconds ago; screw it. [kicks open Ban's door wielding Chastiefol] BAN!
King: Tell me. Nothing can shock me anymore today.
Ban: I'm dating your sister.
King: I'm shocked.
Gowther: Would you fuck your clone?
Ban: Of course I would fuck my clone because who would know how to fuck me better than me?
Escanor: I don't want to fuck my clone because that would be gay sex and I'm not gay.
Merlin: I'm gay, but I still don't want to fuck my clone, that's gross and weird.
King: I don't want to fuck my clone because my self-loathing is that strong.
Diane: It's basically the same as masturbating, right? So no big deal.
Meliodas: To be honest, fucking my clone has always been my fantasy.
Elizabeth: You guys are nasty and frankly, I'm a little bit concerned.

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Merlin: This is the worst part. The calm before the battle.
Arthur: So the battle isn't that bad?
Merlin: Oh, right. I forgot about the battle.
Gowther: How many drinks do you have per week, on average?
Ban: Zero. Zero to six.
Gowther: I'm just gonna write down ten.
Ban: Yeah.
Meliodas: A cop pulled me over once and said "papers"
Meliodas: So I said scissors and drove off
Meliodas: What about 'invisible sandwich'? Imagine eating a sandwich, but everyone just thinks you're crazy!
Merlin: Just stop.
You sound like an idiot trying to be an adult.
- Elaine, to Bandit Ban

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I don't want you to feel guilty, but this is all your fault.
Mael, to Elizabeth
I had to die in order to get my life together.
Meliodas