Brazell: If you hit me, I'll have you court-martialed. Valek: I'm not going to hit you, Brazell. I'm going to stab you. (Source: Stargate)
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@incorrectchroniclesofixia
Brazell: If you hit me, I'll have you court-martialed. Valek: I'm not going to hit you, Brazell. I'm going to stab you. (Source: Stargate)

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Irys: No harm will come to you. The Council will guarantee it. Janco: Is that a 'money back if you're not completely alive' guarantee? (Source: Stargate)
Valek walking into the war room: Permission to barge in, Sir? (Source: Stargate)
[Valek and Yelena lie close to one another for warmth] Yelena: Valek? Valek: It's my dagger, I swear. (Source: Stargate)
Valek: Ari, look scary and take point.

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Janco: You stabbed me! Valek: Yes, Janco, I stabbed you, and I said I was sorry. … Ari: You stabbed me too. Valek: I'm sorry for stabbing everyone! (Source: Stargate)
Valek: alright Janco, how are you going to explain yourself this time?
Janco: I’ll say verbally
Janco: because judging by your expression you might not be in the mood for the rap I’ve prepared
Janco: it costs like $100 to see a therapist. However, it costs $0 to tell myself, “it really do be like that sometimes”
Yelena: Janco, no-
Janco: I sleep with a sword under my pillow
Onora: weak, I sleep with a knife
Maren: I sleep in the armory
Yelena: you're all pathetic
Ari: what do you sleep with then?
Yelena: with Valek
Janco: I just had a thought.
Onora: Your mother would be proud.
(source: mtv screams)

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Yelena: you know, you can solve your problems withou violence
Valek: okay but consider: I’m really, really good at violence
Yes he is 🤧
Yelena: Is this whiskey or perfume?
Janco: -grabs the bottle and chugs- It's perfume.
(Source: John Mulaney)
Irys: What's your preferred study method?
Yelena: Coffee and tears.
(Source: One Day At A Time)
Janco: -hurts his ankle-
Yelena: Can you walk?
Janco: Yeah.
Janco: -takes a step-
Janco: AAAAH
Janco: ...
Janco: It's fine.
(Source: One Day At A Time)
Ambrose: I just don’t think you can do this one.
Valek: I mean, I’ve been an assassin for a while s-
Ambrose: -hands him a picture of a dog-
Valek: Get that shit out of here! You’re right!
(Source: Vine)

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Valek: I know 200 ways to kill a man. Janco: You could glue an open jar of rats to his face, the blowtorch the other side of the jar so the rats have eat their way through his face. Valek: 201.
(Source: Duckman)
Leif: “I have a plan.”
Yelena: “Is it a good plan?”
Leif: “Probably not.”
(Source: Unknown)