Jheiyn

mha as things ive overheard in high-school

part 1

part 2

part 3

part 4

part 5

part 6

part 7

part 8

part 9

part 10

part 11

mha as things my family has said

part 1

part 2

part 3

part 4

part 5

part 6

mha as things my friends said on discord

part 1

part 2

part 3

part 4

part 5

miscellaneous

mha as my improv class

bakugou as things my brother says

mha as things my friend sunny says

satou and shouji as my brother and i

mha as random quotes from my friends

mha as things my friends have said

mha as things my friend benji says

aizawa as my mom's random outbursts

kaminari: why do you have a bottle of ice water? it's cold

sero: because my throat hurts

mina: but it's like 40 something degrees

sero: okay but my throat hurts

kirishima: but it's cold out

sero: that doesn't change the fact that my throat hurts

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koda: what would you do without me

shoji: probably end up in the hospital

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iida: i'm quitting journalism no one in this fucking classroom knows how to spell

iida: who the fuck capitalises 'and'

iida: wait til i And my foot off in your ass

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bakugo: i don't beat children

midoriya: good

bakugo: however

midoriya: WHAT

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bakugou - slammed the dishwasher door too hard (yknow like an idiot) and got it stuck

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ojirou - threw a ball. there's a hole in the wall now

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aoyama - spilled a coffee in the car and some of it got into the aircon

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hagakure - broke a hairbrush

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satou - set a pan on fire

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kaminari - chicken.

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shinsou - the water in his house was acting fucky and it turned brown for some reason

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midoriya - got bit by a dog because he tried to pet it

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sero - made food for someone and left for three days. the food was still there when he returned. he was pissed

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mina - dropped a clear glass plate and was too scared to walk in the kitchen

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jirou - got distracted and the sink overflowed

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iida - had the intrusive thought to use a knife instead of a dart. this did not end necessarily well

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yaoyorozu - the book she was reading was so sad she had to share her sorrow with someone else

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kirishima - broke the fucking microwave

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tokoyami - swore on everything he saw a ghost in his window (he hadn't slept correctly in a week)

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uraraka - broke her favourite potted plant while trying to move it outside

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todoroki - forgot the password to his laptop

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kouda - saw a box of cats on the street and sobbed

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tsuyu - refused to enter the house because there was a roach on the door

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shouji - woke up not knowing what day it was and swore it was wednesday, despite his phone saying it was thursday

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uraraka: iida, most romantic way to tell your significant other youre pregnant?

iida, no hesitation: ak-47

midoriya: WHAT

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shouji: that is an ugly ass baby

shouji: i mean what

tokoyami: shouji...

shouji: who said that bro you cant talk about a child like that

ojirou: he says after talking about a child like that

shouji: SHUT UP

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kirishima: i mean i swallowed a dime once

sero: i swallowed a penny

kaminari: weak asses i swallowed a quarter

bakugou: why the fuck are yall swallowing money

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aizawa: im about to quit

snipe: its almost the end of the year you can do this

aizawa: no its fine i can just jump out the window

ashido: MR AIZAWA?

aizawa: oh i didnt realise you guys were listening

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aizawa: up your fucking ass thats what

shinsou: woAh

aizawa: OH HITOSHI HELLO

shinsou: HI?

aizawa: I DIDNT KNOW YOU WERE HOME HI BABY

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eri: daddy shinsou hit me

shinsou, who hasnt moved for the past 20 minutes: HUH?

aizawa: *puts eri in a blanket*

shinsou: UHM??

aizawa: *picks her up and throws her on the beanbag*

aizawa: lets see hitoshi hit that

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aizawa: oh shit i just ran like three red lights thats probably not good

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aizawa: uh oh here comes some jackoff subaru tryna cut me off

hizashi: please dont rear-end them i still havent recovered from the last time you rear-ended a dumb driver

the rest of the ua staff in the back of the car:

snipe: time for me to get out the car

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aizawa: what the fuck is he doing

hizashi: its a random crackhead only god knows what

aizawa: itd be real damn funny if he ran into the road

shinsou: daddy STOP

eri: yeah thats not nice!

aizawa: well his face aint nice but i still have to look at it

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aizawa, reading the name of nemuris rice cooker: cuckoo...

nemuri: whats wrong with it >:(

aizawa, just randomly(?): CACAW

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all might: alright kiddos we doing dodge ball today so if you got glasses on then you best take em off

iida, throwing his glasses off: fuck it we ball

midoriya: dont hit all might now

iida: if i mistake him for a student cus i cant see then thats his fault

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kirishima: you are the reason we shouldnt be allowed to have art classes

kaminari, drawing a scarily realistic dick: literally what are you talking about

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*during theater club*

shouji: so i just fall

tokoyami: yeah but be dramatic with it

shouji: aight

shouji: *death drops*

kouda: :o

yaoyorozu: OH THATS NOT-

tokoyami: no no let him cook

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mineta: hey bakugou

bakugou: ew disgusting

mineta: whats disgusting is your attitude

bakugou: i hate that kid

bakugou: step on a landmine

iida: NO

bakugou: tell him to fall on a splitter

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ojirou: you guys are cancer

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sero: i dont know how to spell seemteegnces

sero: sentremces

shouji: i can see this

sero: senteexnces

sero: senteneeenvces

sero: jeezus

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aizawa: she accidentally kicked a baby

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*playing bitlife*

shouji: nah how are you broke ugly and dumb my guy

ojirou: pick a fuckin struggle

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bakugou: *sets his phone down and walks out of the room*

midoriya: kacchan what are you–?

bakugou: *runs back into the room full speed and jump kicks his phone*

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ojirou: beat his ass

shouji: gonna uppercut him in his dick watch this

*literally kills the guy*

ojirou: :O

shouji: THATS THE SECOND MURDER AND IM ONLY TEN WHAT THE FUCK

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yaoyorozu: glitter everywhere omg

iida: youll be finding that ish in your carpet for years

yaoyorozu: FUCKKKKKK

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dabi: i got into a fight

spinner: and you won?

dabi: do i look like i LOST

spinner: NO THATS WHY I FUCKING ASKED

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shouji: i would use my main acc but im feeling homophobic today

sero: ANGELO?

sero: STOP THIS

sero: HELP*

uraraka: THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HELP??

sero: SHUT UP

shouji: angelo!!!

sero: BRO 😭

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sero: no ome lmows wnay i wanna say and i dont eother soni have to keep finding ways to sau it LPKE IDK

sero: mhm

todoroki: and you wonder why people dont know what youre trying to say

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ojirou: guys please i need to be publicly executed

sero: omg no youre so eeecy sodnt leyx soemhfe ecevhte you 🥺

kaminari: HELP?

sero: howfid i fuck up thay bas

kirishima: its ok bae try again

sero: i MEANT omg no youre so sexy dont let someone execute you 🥺

ojirou: ok that makes sense

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kirishima: do you guys chew jolly ranchers

sero: if yoo chee kolly rancher is dll perspnally dtsg you o hell

bakugou: iida translate

sero: STOPR

iida: "if you chew jolly ranchers i will personally drag you to hell"

sero: HOWD DONYOU DOT HAY

iida: said it once, i will say it again, i speak illiteracy

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dabi: you are so astronomically boring that i could watch paint dry and be more entertained

shigaraki:

dabi: if someone shot me right now i would thank them cus then i wouldnt have to talk to you

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shouji, on the phone: well i dunno maybe if you werent built like an improper fraction we wouldnt be here

shouji: >:O

shouji: NO IM NOT CALLING YOU FAT IM CALLING YOU UGLY HAVE SOME CLASS

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mic: oh my god im gonna have a stroke

aizawa: whats wrong?

mic: what is the word where you have an idea but then you dont

sir nighteye: you forgot?

mic: NO like you previously had one

aizawa: what 💀

edgeshot: what does that mean 😭

mic: LIKE YOU WERE THINKING

midnight: and??

mic: I DONT KNOW LIKE I PREVIOUSLY WAS THINKING

sir nighteye: YOU MEAN YOU THOUGHT?

mic: if i was in front of you rn i would propose to you YES THANK YOU

hawks: WHY DID YOU DESCRIBE IT SO HORRIBLY

mic: IDK OK IM FUCKING STUPID

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shouji: HELPPPP

shouji: WHO HAS THE TIME TO JUST WALK ILLEGALLY GIRL I WILL HIT YOU LIKE GO SOMEWHERE

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kouda: so 7x8 is–

kouda: 😗

kouda: i think i'll kill myself.

ojirou: THE WAY I FUCKING SCREAMED

tokoyami: STOP THIS IMMEDIATELY 😭

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midoriya: back to the original question: why your feet?

shouji: my medical teacher says your feet! why would you land on your fucking side

todoroki: SO I CAN WALK WHEN I LEAVE THE HOSPITAL

shouji: HEIFER YOU WILL NOT BE LEAVING THE HOSPITAL CUS YOUR INTERNAL ORGANS WILL BE FUCKED THE FUCK UP. YOU WILL DIE.

todoroki: AT LEAST I STILL GOT MY LEGS

shouji: AT LEAST I STILL GOT MY ORGANS

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shinsou: KAMINARI FUCKING DENKI. DM ME AMONG US ONE MORE TIME AND I WILL SKIN YOU ALIVE

kirishima: oh 😰

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bakugou: me personally, people shorter than me don't exist

uraraka: oh im sorry let me just vanish from existence rq 💔

tokoyami: my fault, dawg, lemme get thanos snapped, hollup 🥺

tsuyu: my bad let me go fall off the face of the earth for you 🖕😀

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kirishima: my music stopped for two seconds and i hear "the autistics should do track cus they always be running"

mina: 24 years jail time to whoever said that

kaminari: no parole

sero: electric chair bro

bakugou: fire squad even

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shouji: SATOU BRO MOVE YOUR BLACK ASS FROM UP OFF MY CAR I AM TRYING TO REVERSE

satou: TAKE YOUR BLACK ASS AND DRIVE OFF THE SIDEWALK

shouji: NO THERES PEDESTRIANS NOW MOVE

satou: THEN WHAT AM I?

shouji: A BRICK WALL NOW MOVE

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aoyama: damn ojirou i aint seen you since last year

ojirou:

ojirou: please never talk to me again

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todoroki: *hits his head on the desk*

shinsou: damn

todoroki: what the fuck happened to "are you okay"

shinsou: it died with my patience over break

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shinsou: its too early to be going down the damn stairs

present mic: youre telling me! i walked down five steps and my knees started buckling

aizawa: i walked down one and started having contractions

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shouji: *shuts the door in tokoyami's face*

tokoyami: >:O

jirou: THAT BITCH

tokoyami: hOw- how dare thee

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bakugou: *pushes midoriya*

midoriya: RUDE WTF WHAT DID I DO TO YOU TODAY

sero: damn today?

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todoroki: all these fucking mobs like suck my cock at that point

iida: TODOROKI

todoroki: acting like you dont say the most diabolical bullshit when you think no one is around

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shinsou: MY CAT IS DISCOMBOBULATED

aizawa: HUH?

shinsou: *holding up a squishie cat* HES FUCKED UP

aizawa: i thought you meant the actual cat YOU SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME DAMN IT

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iida: are you making a sandwich at 2 in the morning

todoroki: are you judging me for making a sandwich at 2 in the morning

iida: maybe i am

todoroki: maybe i am

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sero: *pushing mina off the bed* fall off the bed bro

mina: *actually falls* FUCK

sero: HAHAHA FUCKING LOSER

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tokoyami: i firmly believe putting a rainbow at the end of any phrase makes it funnier

satou: i have cancer 🌈

ojirou: i hope you choke 🌈

shouji: my goldfish just died 🌈

kouda: i have crippling depression 🌈

ojirou: oh 😰

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shinsou: follow your dreams type shit

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mina: babe what the balls are you on about

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*in the midst of a girls vs boys debate*

iida: what about the non-binaries

shouji: LEAVE US OUT OF YOUR SHIT

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jirou: dont you worry us women will remember this

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kaminari: smash next question

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midoriya: i forgot mineta was a person

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bakugou: YOUR FLAT BACKED ASS KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT

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uraraka: i bet bakugous weave thats true

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kaminari: thats why you look like a monkey

bakugou: ok i see how it is

*literally a minute later*

bakugou, now sitting on kaminari's back: dont start no battles you cant win now

bakugou: this is what happens when you make stupid ass decisions

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shinsou: god damn why is it so hot in this bathroom

todoroki: because iida likes to shower in a fucking volcano

iida: says the bitch that showers in the artic

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shouji: ojirou bro you and these fucking christmas ornaments

ojirou: theyre pretty ok

shouji: put these heifers to rest you have like 1000 of them

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uraraka: MOMO IM SORRY

yaoyorozu: why? whats wrong?

uraraka: I SPILLED YOUR TEA ON MY DRESS

yaoyorozu: FUCK MY TEA ARE YOU OK?

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bakugou: bro grab that doll by her two fucking pigtails and thundercunt her to another universe it is not that hard

kaminari: but she always comes back

sero: OK WILLIAM AFTON she wouldnt come back if you ROCKED HER SHIT

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shouji: touch kouda's bunny and i will personally break your fingers backwards you gonna be typing backwards today

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aizawa: *picks something up*

aizawa: what the fuck is this

mina: oh i–

aizawa: nevermind i dont care

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midoriya: damn my back hurts

shinsou: let me help you

midoriya:

midoriya: okay

shinsou: *kicks midoriya in the back*

midoriya: OW YOU SONAVA BITCH

shinsou, calmly: how do you feel

midoriya: LIKE KILLING YOUR ASS

shinsou: NO YOUR BACK YA ASSHOLE

midoriya: oh

midoriya: i am in severe pain