Back in this Dungeon
Heya, Tumblr.
It's been a while. Last time we saw each other, I was broke af. It was the darkest time, the deepest I'd ever been. Despite all the challenges, I rose up. I came back stronger. I am better now.
12 years ago, I was this curious teen who accidentally stumbled upon this mystery. The mystery? You, Tumblr. I entered this unknown dungeon not knowing who's in here, what to do, where I would go, when it happened, why I entered, and how to navigate. There are a lot of things I could say to describe myself, but here are some: reckless, immature, heartbreaker, clueless, asshole, stupid, yet adventurous, diligent, resilient, and brave. I guess it's true that there's a fine line between stupidity and bravery. I regret a lot of things, but I'm glad I met a few people who helped me grow along the way. I'm really thankful for those people, especially when I was in the dark.
In case I haven't told you, Tumblr, I found a new love. I never knew love could change me for the better. I didn't know it was supposed to be this fun, yet serious and mature. I may contradict myself here, but there are immature moments, arguments, and all that other stuff, but it works. We make it work, and it's beautiful. I thought I would never find someone better. I knew I could love better. It just came unexpectedly. I hope this is the love that I deserve and the love that will be with me through the end.
I found new hobbies. I found new friends. Some are acquaintances, nonetheless, they gave me laughs and a new perspective. Some of my childhood friends are getting married, some are getting engaged, some are starting to love again, and some are still trying to find what love is.
Even if I'm really thankful for everything, it doesn't mean everything is going well. Don't be confused, I am genuinely happy with my life right now. It just feels like I am running out of time. It feels like I should have accomplished a lot more than I expected of myself. I could have done better in some things, I could have progressed further, and every fcking "what if." I don't blame anyone. I don't blame myself. I guess I just don't know where it went wrong. Despite all this, I still believe I got this. I still believe I can handle every challenge that will come.
You saw different versions of me, Tumblr. There are still a lot of things I regret from when I was here, but I know there are some, if not a few, that I'm really thankful for.
Anyway, great to see you again. And for those who took the time to read this long-ass post, congratulations, you gained nothing. If you gained something, even if it's a negative one, still, thank you for your time, and I hope you're doing well.
Let's conquer our own worlds. Adios!
