Haha, Oops

Charlie didn’t even find the ticket in his first bar, or his second. His first bar, his birthday present, was a dud, and he even failed to enjoy it like normal because he dared to hope, just for a moment, that he might actually be lucky enough to get the one. Later, he is lucky enough to find a dropped 50p piece in the street, and goes to buy a chocolate bar for himself. Finally holding a treat that is all his, he wolfs the thing down, stopping only long enough to realises that he didn’t get lucky and win a Golden Ticket. It’s only on the third bar that he gets it, and, smelling blood in the water, the shopkeeper tells him to immediately go home and not tell a soul that he has it, knowing what people might do to this small starving boy if they find out what he has.

And Wonka knows! He knows he done goofed! He realises almost immediately that the people who have been attracted to his lottery, who have stacked the decks in their favour, are awful, cruel, entitled people! Augustus Gloop, the glutton, doesn’t care what placed in front of him so long as it’s food - and the first obstacle? A room where everything is a kind of sweet. Violet’s gum-chewing is excessive, but the modern film adapts this into a more realistic and sinister flaw - overcompetitiveness. It’s not just that she’s been chewing the same piece of gum for months, it’s that she’s been chewing the same piece of gum, weeks after its taste is gone, whether it is socially acceptable or not, just to break a record. So when Wonka promises a new treat, a personal favourite of one of the kids, but says it’s not ready yet and you can’t have it, of course Violet seizes it, because damn the consequences, she will be the first to try it. Veruca is shown a collection of unique animals, and immediately declares that she wants one, because she’s always had the bragging rights and luxury rare items. And when Mr Wonka refuses to sell? She steals it, because dang it, she will have that golden goose/trained squirrel! Mike Teevee, in his hubris, mutilates himself almost beyond recognition because he had to challenge Mr Wonka’s outlandish claim of transmitting physical objects via television. Charlie was the perfect heir, not because he was humble and poor, but because he had the wonder and appreciation for the treats Wonka made but also the sense and caution not to risk messing with the many dangerous things in an active factory. If the lottery was more fair, maybe Charlie would have had more stiff competition, but as it stands, Charlie is almost the poster boy of ‘won by doing nothing’.

Sorry, got sidetracked

What’s the current definition of stupidity? It might be trying to write meta for a twenty-six year old show. But you know what? I’m doing it anyway. I make questionable fandom choices and regret mostly nothing.

So. I’m still watching Deep Space Nine—about halfway through season five, but with pretty much every spoiler under my belt considering I have no patience and dove straight into the fic—and I am, without a doubt, absolute garashir trash. Now this is important because as I watch I’ve been on the lookout for all the major scenes and episodes that the fans like to talk about, those that catch our attention for obvious reasons: “Past Prologue,” “The Wire,” “Our Man Bashir,” and the like. However, through my (admittedly cursory) browsing these last few months, I’ve been surprised to find no one talking about season four’s finale “Broken Link.”

On the surface it makes sense. Though Garak gets one of his all too rare episodes, we’ve past the point of no return with Berman’s homophobia and our two lovesick faves aren’t interacting as much as they once did. RIP. 

Thus, it’s easy to pass over Garak doing another Bad Thing in the name of his Cardassian devotion, especially when the Bad Thing is circumvented thanks to Worf instead of Julian. However, what’s nagged at me since watching that scene is one simple, yet significant detail.

Julian was down on that planet.

Quick re-cap for those of us who haven’t watched in a while: the Defiant is taking Odo back to the Great Link in order to cure him of the disease they saddled him with in the first place (nice, huh?). Garak realizes that this may be the one and only time they have all the Founders together and potentially vulnerable. He tries to gain control of the Defiant’s weaponry, but is ultimately discovered and stopped by Worf. Sorry, Garak. You might be surprisingly fit for just a plain, simple tailor, but you’ve got nothing on a battle-obsessed Klingon.

OH COOOUURRSSSEEE!! Please take this messy Post-Empire look for him 💞

A weed Pikachu. Found her at Savers.