“taylor swift writes generic pop songs” isn’t a take i thought i’d be seeing in 2023 bc in recent years she’s putting out songs like “oh, woe and suffering! i have married a man i do not love and am now engaging in a torrid affair with the only person who truly understands me…i know not what my foul husband would do if we were discovered! i must run away with my beloved, before it is too late!”

before you say “but katie! ivy isn’t a pop song!” i need you to know and her pop songs are like “here’s all the reasons i’m hard to love, sorry! i ended a comfortable relationship to follow my high ambitious and i am happy and successful and i don’t particularly miss that person but sometimes i wonder what life would have been like if i had chosen safety. my loneliness in my childhood has lead to me crafting intricate plans to make someone love me. here’s the whole story of my career thus far, including my struggles with depression and an eating disorder. wait, you want to be with me?…are you SURE??”

still need to know what the fuck was up with supercorp. two of the gayest straight bitches alive.

“what a beautiful wedding!” says a bridesmaid to a waiter. yes but what a shame. what a shame the poor groom’s bride is ✨ fucked in the head ✨