me reading tfc for the 18th time: oh my god andrew you wanted a family too. you were used to moving every year, used to not meaning anything to anybody, so when you met your brother, the one person in the world who's job it is to give a shit about you, you assumed you weren't gonna mean anything to him either. the only mother you ever loved you had to suffer for. you naturally thought the only way your brother would love you would be if you had to suffer for him too. and then you got there and you watched him destroy himself to keep his mom and he's your brother, you can't let this happen again.
and then she hits you. she leaves blood trails and bruises on your skin and she calls you aaron. and then he apologizes to you. so you send him to study group in your place. you take one of his t-shirts from the drawer. you pick at the skin around your nails like he does. you get in the car alongside her and you nod when she says you're going to pick andrew up. its dark. grab the steering wheel. see the headlights reflect off of the speed sign. hear her scream. your stomach turns when the car flips. feel your scalp bleed. she stops screaming. hospital. bandages. white lights. iv drip. he's shaking in the chair next to you. he's crying when he tells you she's dead and all you can think is i did it for you.
areudirty
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romaincrisis
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