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children are so fucking funny man. i just overheard a kid go “i just learned a new way to pinch, wanna see it? it hurts a lot more!” followed by a loud, notably pained scream

basketball players fight over the basketball because they are hypnotized before each game to believe it is their egg

She’s in a bedroom posing for an artsy nude photo not exposing herself on the street please be for real expeditiously

People wouldn't be reacting that way if it was a vagina.

don't be mean to yourself that's you

you live there

glad they added new maps to baseball

wait what did nintendo ds stand for? dick sucking??ewwwww. the dsi? dick suck international??? ewwww

yuo cant say this during plague month

pride month. pharohs curse got me

grounding techniques, ok 5 things i can see. I see bricks, I see mortar, I see a trowel, I see a cask of wine, I see that asshole Montresor glaring at me over the top of the wall…

sorry to be a broken record every month but christ menstruation is a stupid concept. oooooh excuse me for not getting pregnant, why the fuck is there goo falling out of me about it? grow the fuck up and reabsorb that shit for nutrients.