* half moon
idsooyeonâ:
ââŠright?âÂ
he looks at her with kind eyes and tells himself to proceed with caution, tells himself he should be incapable of this--of paring himself back in layers, opening up and being softer, kinder, tender. he tries to tell himself that girls like sooyeon are dangerous, that feelings are temporary. yet here, with her so close and the tension slowly dissipating around them, jaeyoon feels exposed with his heart in his throat.Â
he watches her and lets the warmth of her promise wash over his skin.
he doesnât believe her. not really.Â
still, he lets himself smile, strokes his thumb under her eye and tells himself to try.
âiâll catch you if you fall.â doesnât he always?
and all the while, the wheels turn inside his head as his stare lingers, heats just a little before he casts his eyes to a point beyond her shoulders. nowhere and everywhere else but on sooyeonâs eyes, her mouth against his palm, all at once.Â
her voice comes suddenly--like an echo at the end of a tunnel--the shift in conversation jerking him from the memory of a champagne kiss, sticky sweet and oh so warm, so suddenly he has to blink, his gaze sharpening for a split second, cooling, before he remembers where he is, who heâs with, and gifts her with a hint of a smile, indulgent and amused.
âaw câmon,â his voice is a warm tease, tone light enough to convey he means no harm, that he will hold no grudges over her. his lips widen, a notch more genuine, as he drops his hand from her face to poke her gently in the cheek instead. âyou know i wouldnât do that to you.â
right?
the question goes unspoken and he leaves the worry, the uncertainty caged inside his heart. he doesnât tell her that heâs afraid, that she holds his wretched heart in the palm of her hands. âi care too much to hurt you.â you know this too, right? do you believe me, sooyeon? âbesides, youâd kick my ass if i did.â
the joking is easy. this is what heâs used to. this is what heâs good at. pretending--it feels familiar, enough that jaeyoon can almost convince himself that everythingâs okay between them, that it will continue to be, just like it had been before. before.
but he hears the hesitation in sooyeonâs voice and tells himself to handle her with care. turns the knife point towards his own throat and reaches between them, calloused fingers wrapping around her wrist, fingertips pressed light against the thud of her pulse. when he speaks, he weaves his heart, his treacherous feelings into a promise:Â âyouâll always have me, sooyeon.â
all you have to do is say the word.













