Nan

For Billy, landing back in Cali was like taking a deep, almost desperate breath, after being held down under water for months. The moment his feet touched the dusty, sun baked ground, and he felt that familiar warm Pacific breeze touching his skin, the tension in his shoulders began to soften and if anyone was around to see it, you could probably pin point the exact moment it happened.

Something cleaner in the air. Didn't harbor that off putting combo of cow shit and tractor dust and all that shitty midwestern rain that made you feel raw and dirty all the time. Here it smelled like the sea and freedom. Full of blue skies and familiar places.

God he missed it and being back only intensified the feeling.

Beneath the relief though, was this simmering restlessness, a kind of anxiety. He'd been secretly counting down the minutes since they got here. The funeral. The family bullshit. Just here in California for a quick weekend, not because Neil wanted to be. In fact he complained the entire time. Susan's brother died and there was a funeral to attend, but Neil made it clear they weren't staying, and she was lucky he was letting her go at all.

Billy couldn't give two shits about some guy he never met. He was here for other reasons.

Truth was the thought of you had been this constant low frequency hum in the back of his mind since he turned his back and drove off that early autumn day.

On the drive back, every girl with your hair color that blew past his rolled down window made his adrenaline spike, until he realized the color wasn't exactly right, the face not quite you. The way your eyes sparkled like California sunshine, he'd know them in an instant.

He'd spent the last few nights barely sleeping at all, his mind racing with memories of you. The way you looked at the beach, pretty hair blowing soft around your smiling face, the sun highlighting your skin, your laugh and the way it gave him that familiar ache inside his chest. You, the only girl who could ever dare tell him to shut the fuck up and him actually listening, well for the most part, even if he just did it so you'd kiss him.

He'd been planning his sneak away for a while. Knew Neil would never let him go off on his own once they got here, so he had to just do it, damn the consequences. He would deal with Neil later. The questions. The brutality that would follow. Doesn't linger on those thoughts right now, more important things on his mind than his asshole father. Who was never really a father at all.

There was a burning inside him, this need, a frantic, hungry energy in his veins to take back the only part of his life that didn't feel like a constant battle. His life here, in California, before Hawkins, before leaving everything he ever loved behind for some horse shit town that didn't know him at all.

Wasn't just coming to visit an old girlfriend, he was coming to find himself again. To sink back into the warmth of the only person who made him feel like he could just be.

You.

The Camaro even seemed happier here. She purred softer, ran smoother, it was like she remembered too. Away from where she always coughed and choked, had a hard time getting started in the bitter winter of Indiana.

So glad Neil let him drive here himself, leading the way. Neil's truck, fortunately for Billy but unfortunately for Max, had only room for three. Billy needed to be alone with his thoughts and he was secretly glad Susan didn't insist that he take Max in the Camaro.

Drives along the familiar streets on the way to your house. Knows them like the back of his hand. Been there a hundred times, both in real life and in his dreams. Nothing's changed since he left and yeah, okay, it's only been about seven months since then, but Billy knew that things had a way of changing in a heartbeat, and not always for the best.

Pulls up outside your house. Looks exactly the same as he remembered. The street quiet, but not Hawkins quiet, a prettier kind of peacefulness... like nostalgia wrapped in this blue sea of long forgotten hazy memories, suddenly coming to life, and it makes him smile.

Gives the engine a little rev, just because it's something he used to do when he drove up to your house to pick you up, of course, this time you're not expecting him.

Cuts the engine. Just sits a minute wondering if he should have a smoke first, but instead he reaches for a stick of gum, then even decides against that. Bites his nails instead.

Sighs soft, head falling back against the headrest for a beat, to gather the courage to go to your door and say... say what exactly... hi... it's been a while... you remember me, right?

Before the move, your relationship was this beautiful, chaotic whirlwind of lust and deeply intense sex, arguing then making up. Billy, always the golden boy no matter where he lived, the surfer kid with that dangerous smile. Late night drives along the Pacific Coast Highway, windows down, salty air blowing through your hair, the radio loud, Camaro fast. Those nights you two would sit on the roof of that old abandoned building downtown, get high and look at the stars, talk about dreams and the future. He taught you how to catch your first wave. You taught him how to be faithful to just one girl, something he hasn't done since. You, a beach bum, just like him. There was this intensity in the way you looked at him, that he loved but could never put into words that feeling it gave him. When he drove off that bright blue day, it was like the sun had been ripped from his sky. The weather in Indiana reflecting his feelings, when he stepped out of his Camaro and into that hick town without a friend in the world.

"Get the fuck up, asshole."

Mumbles against the fingers pushed against his teeth, spitting a nail out the open window. Gets up and out of the car, all slow and lazy, so Billy-like. Moves like he's catering to an audience, even when there isn't one.

The dry heat hits him and he loves it, lives for it. Missed it with every ounce of his being. Something about the air in Cali, makes his curls pop and bounce pretty against his shoulders without the help of any product at all.

Realizes his palms are sweaty, so he runs them along his jeans. His nerves getting to him more than he wants to admit, all his little nervous habits coming out all at once.

Walks up the few steps to your door. Heart hammering hard. For some reason he's terrified the girl he remembers, the girl who is his anchor to this place, might have moved on or worse... might look at him and see nothing but a shell of the guy she used to know. He's become more angry. He knows it. Feels like his world is out of his control. You only know the California Billy... not whatever grew in it's place over these past few months.

Knocks firm... hard... maybe a little too hard on your door. Seems to boom even over the soft din of cars driving by and seagulls overhead. His hand coming down and unconsciously pressing against the shark tooth he keeps in his pocket, a comfort really... a habit too, of pressing the outline of it, rough edges digging into his fingers, sometimes until they bleed.

The second the door swings open, it feels as though all the air in his lungs is sucked right out. Standing there like an angel, right there in front of him and he feels lovesick all over again.

You.

Not in his head. Not in a photo. But you... real. Seeing your face after all this time hurts. Feels like this violent rush of everything he's been trying to push down since he left flooding up to the surface too fast.

God you're more beautiful than he remembered, if that was even possible. More beautiful than the worn out photo he has of you tucked deep in the pages of his Penthouse magazine, hidden away from the prying eyes of all the random girls he brings to his room or nosy little sisters.

"Missed me, baby?"

His mouth curls into that slow easy grin you missed so much. Just standing there outside your door, like he's god's gift to the world.

"BLUE? OMG!! Billy!!"

You scream and jump into his arms. He catches you instinctively. You wrap your bare legs around his hips, burying your face against his warm neck, smelling his skin, kissing him everywhere you can get your lips.

You're flooded with so much emotion and absolute shock, seeing him standing there at your door again, after all this time. You're giggling like an idiot, can't help yourself, you're so unbelievably happy.

Blue... a nickname he almost forgot... buried down deep with everything else from this place. Hidden somewhere inside himself where no one could find it, not even him. Until you said it again, and all the memories come rushing back. A name you gave him because of all the time he spent by the sea, those blue denim Levi's he lives in, his Camaro, of course, but most of all because of those gorgeous baby blues that will stare into your soul if you let them.

He says your name. It's soft, a choke, his voice cracking just a little. Might be ashamed, if it was heard by anyone other than you.

"Are you real?"

You ask, pulling back and looking at the face you would know with your eyes closed. There's something different there though, a soft tiredness, dark circles beneath his eyes, but the sparkle is there, maybe smaller, but still burning pretty.

"Yeah, I'm real. You though... fuck... still a sexy little thing."

Gives you a sly smile, letting you slide down his body, but still holding you close. Thick heavy body exactly like you remember, although his shoulders seem broader, like he's grown more, or he's been lifting weights more than he used to. Maybe you just forgot how solid he always felt, pressed this close.

His hands come up and cup your pretty face, thumbs tracing the line of your jaw, rubbing softly and it feels so good. You stare at each other for what feels like forever.

"What's with the caterpillar?"

You ask and his eyebrows furrow.

You motion to his mustache.

"Funny."

He laughs and so do you.

"I like it. Looks good on you. You look really good... like always."

You say, then add:

"What are you doing here, Bills? Moving back, I hope!"

You smile up at him and your beauty takes his breath.

"I wish... family shit... funeral."

He says.

"Neil? Did Neil... ?"

You ask, hopeful.

Billy makes this short little huff sound.

"Nah, some guy I've never even fuckn' met... bunch of bullshit really. Just a way to get back to the coast... back to you, baby."

He answers, gaze lingering on your pretty soft lips for a beat before flicking back up to your eyes.

"God Billy, I've missed you so much! We all do. Just wasn't the same after you left."

You say, referring to the group of friends you two hung with.

"Well fuck, I mean who wouldn't miss me?"

He jokes, making a little tsk sound with his teeth.

You smile, playing with the soft curls that fall around his shoulders. His hair much longer than when you last saw him.

"After you left, we all kind of drifted apart, ya know? Sid joined the Army... loser couldn't even get past basic training and now he's fixing cars with his uncle at the shop. Lloyd's at Cal Tech... got into computers if you can believe that. He says they're the future or some shit."

You chuckle and Billy's smirk falters for just a second.

Truth was Billy wasn't ever really super close to anyone, except maybe you. Thinks about the crazy energy you all had though. It was fun. The stupid late night drunk surfing, racing down the streets to see who's car was the fastest, that was until the cops came and ruined all the fun. All of you out all hours of the night, sometimes until the sun came up. Because California never shuts off, like Hawkins does. Billy missed that. A nice distraction from what waited for him once he got back home, always past his curfew.

"The army? Jesus. I could have told him he wasn't cut out for that shit."

Laughs, shaking his head, but the humor in his eyes fades and you see this sudden sharp intensity in them. His eyes were always so expressive. You could always tell when he was lying to you, or if he was off in some way, after a fight with Neil or if there was just something on his mind. They're still sitting pretty, hidden behind the longest lashes you've ever seen on a guy. Still such a pretty boy. Tight jeans and motorcycle boots, his usual attire when he wasn't at the beach. Wearing this faded Metallica t-shirt, from a concert you all went to a few years ago. As always that Virgin Mary pendant dangling from around his neck... was his mom's. You didn't really understand fully why he still wore it, after what she did to him. You didn't bring it up and he didn't talk about it.

"Wanna come inside? No one's home."

You say, soft and sweet. Looking at those tiny freckles across the bridge of his nose, realizing how much you've missed him. How it hurts your heart just to see him standing here. That warm familiar smell of cigarettes and those soft amber notes of his faded cologne. The same damn cologne he wore when he lived down the street from you. Something else there too, always was... something comforting to you, something uniquely Billy.

"Oh yeah? Wanna show me how much you missed me?"

He hums, your faces close together, eyes burning into yours like he's reading your thoughts. His fingers finding yours, interlacing them together.

"Maybe."

You bite your bottom lip and guide him inside.

The climb up to your bedroom is a frantic, breathless blur of tangled limbs and desperate needy friction. Pushing you against a wall, hands roaming over your curves like they're the salvation for all his sins. You undo his belt between soft bites and tender kisses, random clothes falling anywhere and everywhere along the hallway.

Billy feels feral, a starving need to be close to you, to somehow erase the distance Indiana put between you two. But despite the desperate, almost violent rush to get naked, to feel you against him, to get inside you, his touch is warm and intentional, like he's savoring this.

The moment his lips touch yours, everything else falls away. No outside world pulling him in places he doesn't want to go. There's only the scent of your skin. The reality of you, back in his arms.

His strong frame is heavy against yours, pinning you to the mattress, once he has you down on the bed. Eyes burning like a blue fire, wild and hungry, his breaths heavy against your mouth.

"Fuck." (He says your name). Thought about you every night. Wondering if you'd even remember me... remember how good we were."

Whispers, gaze raking over your beautiful face, like something out of a dream he never thought would come true. Never thought he'd be lucky enough to touch you again.

"Never forget you... ever, Billy."

You say and his lips crash against yours again. Tongue sweeping into your mouth, hands everywhere all at once. Tugging your tank top up and over your head, tossing it somewhere on the floor behind him. Hot mouth licking and kissing from your lips, trailing down the sensitive line of your throat, teeth grazing your skin. Sucks and bites hard, causing instant bruises and you moan, eyes fluttering shut. It's crazy how his mouth alone can drive you crazy.

"Not gonna let you forget, baby."

He huffs.

His fingers fast and experienced, unhooking your bra and tossing it aside. His bare skin finally meeting yours, the touch burning hot, skin on skin and the sensation makes him whimper. Lifts his head, looking down at your naked body beneath his.

"So fuckn' beautiful."

He pants, pretty curls framing his face. He's like an angel.

Lips leaning down, his mouth achingly hot when he latches onto your nipple, sucking on it hard, leaving this tingling feeling that goes straight to your core, making you squirm against the sheets, arching your body more into his.

"Billy... missed you... missed this."

You whimper, running your fingers through his perfect curls, tugging. He licks straight across your skin, from one nipple over to the other. Hot mouth sucking firm, then popping off and flicking it rapidly with his tongue. One hand busy squeezing and kneading your opposite tit, while his mouth worships the other.

Billy loves your softness. Loves how your body tastes. Could swallow you whole, melt himself completely into you. That way he'd never be alone again.

Big hand slides lower, flat down your belly. His mind frantic with an impatient energy, a desperate hunger that's been building through the long months without you. Stroking his cock, alone in his room, thinking about this exact moment. Feels like he could cum right now, lose himself completely right here, before he's even inside you, before his cock is even out of his briefs.

Your skin, so familiar and so devastatingly beautiful, makes his cock throb and leak, aching to be inside your tightness. God he missed you so much.

Presses his thick fingers against your bare cunt, sliding them down through your folds, groaning, breath huffing against your skin. Gathering your slick, running his fingers back up to your clit, rubbing with slow delicious circles. You arch your back, bucking softly into his hand.

"Wanna taste you, Billy."

You moan, pushing softly against his chest.

Takes a moment for him to move, not wanting to leave this perfect spot. Resisting the urge to dive into your cunt with his tongue. To lap hungrily at your pretty slit. The smell of your pussy so heady, making his mouth water. Wants desperately to push his face right in that perfect heat, but he lets you move him anyway, your words making his balls tighten.

Rolls onto his back, head against your pillows, soft, dirty blonde curls splayed out all pretty. Watches you through heavy lids, pink lips slightly parted.

"I'm all yours, baby girl."

His words are shaky, his eyes soft and wet.

Levis already long gone somewhere in the hallway. You slowly run your hands along his solid, muscular thighs. They're strong and thick, hot to the touch. Your hands running smooth straight up to the waistband of his white briefs. You stop there, watching his blissed out face before pulling them down, slowly.

"Mmm... all for me?"

You hum, watching his pretty dick spring free.

This soft little sound comes out of him, when you free his cock, his head pushing further back against your pillows, as he watches you. Watches as your eyes trace the length of him, making his hips twitch involuntarily, wanting you to touch him. Licks his lips when you take him in your hand. Hot and heavy. Your fingers barely able to wrap fully around his girth. You forgot just how big Billy really was.

"Fuck, angel... you're gonna be the death of me."

He mumbles, breathing harder. His fingers tangling in the sheets next to him, trying to anchor himself. Pushing his hips slightly up and off the mattress, needy, desperate for the girl he's been dreaming of for months.

Billy's cock is beautiful. Thick and weighty, yet soft like velvet against your skin. The tip flushed a pretty pink, the same pink as his lips. Sunlight streaming through your curtains catches on the beads of pre cum that pool at the head, and you lean down and lick them off with the flat of your tongue.

"Still such a slut for me."

Growls, this sharp wave of pleasure shooting throughout his entire body once your hot tongue laps at the head of cock, then running it underneath the tip, along the spot you know drives him crazy. You're squeezing him nice and tight, but not moving your hand just yet.

Just tasting him. Teasing him.

Watching you through hooded eyes, his pupils blown wide as your head dips down, taking his large cock in your mouth, slow and deep. Your lips stretching wide around his thickness. The tight wet heat of your mouth shatters him, breathless sounds bubble up from somewhere deep in his chest. You feel his body go taut. You run your hand over his tight abs, raking your nails back down his smooth, tan skin, making his muscles quiver under you, and you love it so much when Billy lets go.

He deserves to be loved.

"Mmm, you taste so fucking good, Billy."

Lifting off him for a beat, just to tell him, then swallowing his cock again, deeper this time.

He reaches down, big hand gripping your hair, not tight, not rough, but enough to guide your movements. Fingers lazily scratching against your scalp, lacing through your hair.

You suck him good and slow, enjoying the way he tastes. It's addictive, the salty musk of him.

You hollow out your cheeks and stroke what can't fit into your mouth. Spit pools around the edges and slides down past your fingers, slipping down his shaft.

"That's my girl... take it... take every inch like I know you can, baby."

He purrs and you look up at him with your sexy eyes, sinking down more. You're rewarded with another pretty sound coming from deep his throat and you hum, the vibrations echoing throughout his whole body and he chuckles soft and scratches your scalp.

"Fuck, gonna make me shoot my load."

He lets out this little huff, almost a laugh, but it mixes with a sweet little moan, his fingers gripping tighter on your hair.

There's a heavy ache in your jaw from the obscene way your mouth is stretching around him. The sounds you're making on his dick are sloppy and pornographic. You gag a little, letting him hit the back of your throat, the weight of him filling your mouth completely. You feel him react, his bum lifting slightly when he feels that sexy warmth sinking down and swallowing him completely.

You pull back up to the tip, then swallow him down in one long motion again and again. Using your hand, gripping him at the base, stroking in tandem with the sucking of your hot, wet mouth. His thighs tremble lightly, his toes curling against your sheets and you can tell by his breathing that he's close.

There's a softness in the way he looks down at you. Something like love maybe. You pull away slowly. A thin trail of spit and pre cum connecting you two together. You lick across your lips and he watches as the saliva breaks and you smile up at him, smacking his fat dick against your outstretched tongue.

You smile all cute and he wants to slap you, cum on your face and maybe even marry you. Your lips are swollen and pink, your eyes soft and watery. His hand softens its grip in your hair, his thumb presses against your forehead, rubbing in little circles.

"Such a good girl for me."

His voice sounds wrecked.

"You want my pussy, Billy?"

You ask, this sweet begging look in your pretty eyes.

"Fuck, yeah. Want that sweet cunt so bad, baby."

Hums soft, then grabs your waist and hoists you up, quick, dragging your body over his until you're straddling him. Your wet, aching heat pressed hard against his throbbing cock.

"So impatient."

You tease, your head tilting towards your shoulder, biting your bottom lip all coy. Fingernails trailing down his chest and belly, leaving tiny little red marks on his skin.

"You fuckn' can't wait either... been missing my big dick and you know it."

Smirks, but you can see in blown out pupils just how much he needs this. That he's missed you just as much as you've missed him.

You lower yourself slowly, your eyes locked on his as you guide the thick, heavy head against your soaked hole. The second his tip pushes against you, you both moan, his hands digging into your hips, helping to guide you down his thick length. You sink down slowly. You feel the stretch already, filling your cunt with a delicious fullness and it's just in a little past the tip.

When he finally gets inside you, fully inside you, balls deep, you let out a sharp breathless cry, your head falling back as you get used to the sheer mass of him. He holds you still and you feel it pulse inside you, deep and heavy and it feels like heaven. Billy fills you like no one ever could. You watch his jaw clench, his fingers flexing on your hips, his whole body trying hard to not rut violently into you.

Finally you start to move in slow, grinding circles, your hips rolling sexy, making him groan deep, his tongue coming out and licking across his lips. The friction is delicious, a searing heat that builds in your low belly and radiates throughout your whole body. You pick up the pace, becoming more frantic, lifting your hips and slamming back down. The sloppy sounds bouncing off your bedroom walls.

"You fill me so good, baby... fuck... your cock is so perfect."

You cry, bouncing pretty, tits jiggling, more sexy than anything he's ever seen in his entire life.

"Yeah, you like that... like my fat dick in your tight hole."

Billy's hands move from your hips, sliding up to your waist, fingers bruising your soft skin as he pulls you down harder, forcing you to take every bit of him. His heels digging into the mattress as he ruts himself up to meet your downward bounces.

"Mmm... love it, Billy... mmm."

You lean forward, tits brushing against his chest. You reach, grabbing his hands, lacing your fingers with his as you drive yourself down onto him again and again. His cock hitting perfectly against your cervix with every deep thrust, making your vision blur and your mind go fuzzy.

You can't control the volume of your voice and the crazy sounds you're making. You're loud and wild, moaning and screaming. Anyone walking past your window right now might think you were being murdered, but you don't give a shit, because Billy Hargrove is back and his dick is buried deep in your cunt and you're hopelessly in love with him.

He's completely undone by the sight of you, the way your pretty hair tosses wildly with every bounce on his cock, your lips parted and glistening. Ecstasy written all over your beautiful face and he's captivated by you. His own breath coming in jagged, desperate hitches as he lets you take control.

"Yeah, just like that, princess.. fuck... you're so tight, angel... milking my cock so good."

He rasps. Can feel the pressure building deep in his balls, knows he's got to stop soon or he's going shoot his load before you cum and he doesn't want that, just feels too good to stop.

You're lost in pleasure, eyes half closed, your breath hitching in your throat as you find the perfect rhythm. You can feel the tension in his thighs, the way his muscles flex beneath you as you bounce happily along his fat dick.

That tension in your belly snaps, this beautiful sensation fills your entire body. An explosion deep in your core making your whole body arch and grind down, pussy fluttering as you cum, wild and beautiful, milking his cock good, bouncing on it rough and fast.

"Billy... oh fuck!... Fuck... Billy...."

A second later Billy moans your name, his hips pushing back up into you, then stopping, holding your hips still as he cums. Shoots his hot load deep in your cunt, filling you up.

You collapse against his chest, both of you breathing hard and laughing softly at the intensity of it all.

"Jesus, you really missed me, yeah?"

He teases.

"Please... who missed who? You came all the way from Indiana for a little pussy."

You laugh and give his pec a little bite, leaving behind an imprint of your teeth.

"Ouch! Such a little bitch. Bitch with the prettiest pussy though... worth every mile to get here."

Laughs soft and natural, his hand running through your hair.

Billy exhales a slow cloud of smoke from his lungs up to your ceiling. His head resting back against your headboard as he watches the lazy swirl dissipate, dancing with the sunlight pushing through your slightly open window. His eyes are vibrant blue and glassy. First time in forever the constant buzzing in his head has gone quiet. Forgot how it feels so much lighter here, forgot how easy going everything is. The lonely edges of his life feel a thousand miles away.

That warm sun just hits different. The pretty way it comes through your bedroom curtains, all warm and golden. It's like this memory that's just surfacing back into Billy's head... right here, in the familiarity of your room, your bed, the smell of you, of sex and perfume, of salty sea breezes.

The way your body feels so familiar to him, the weight of it pressed close against his. Likes the way you fit there with this terrifying perfection, like you were meant to be there.

The silence is beautiful, but it's also dangerous.

It's the kind of quiet that lets the thoughts creep in. Thoughts he usually drowns out with loud music, fast cars, that adrenaline rushing through his veins when he's looking for a fight to quiet the noise inside himself. That tug of softness, of letting his guard down just enough for someone to see him, the real him. The version he hides away.

You're such a pussy, Billy

But...

The weight of you against him right now is too grounding. The warmth of your skin, the way your breathing is slow and peaceful. That he can make you feel that way.

In the back of his mind he knows though... knows that in a few hours he'll be gone.

He's just a ghost and he knows it.

Thick fingers trace the soft curve of your hip, the dip of your waist. His touch gentle, as if, in a way, he's afraid that touching you too heavy, too much, might break whatever beautiful spell you two were in right now. In this beautiful haze of softness.

Little dust motes floating in the light, the quiet hum of someone mowing their lawn a few streets down, his weight heavy against your soft bed. Takes another drag, the smoke stinging his lungs good. Lives for the burn, helps him feel alive, although he figures the cigarettes will probably kill him one day, but that's okay. He doesn't really care too much.

You lift your head, glancing up at his face. He's not looking at you, still looking up at the patterns of light that play on your ceiling. The same pretty light catching on his dirty blonde curls, and reflecting in his eyes, making them glimmer. Eyes so blue they remind you of the days you two spent at the Pacific cove, fucking around, being stupid, having the time of your lives. It's like Billy's got the ocean right there... in those pretty blue eyes, framed by the longest, darkest lashes you've ever seen on a guy and you wonder if his mom had those too.

"Stay just like that! You look so cute right now!"

You say, jumping off the bed and running over to your closet.

Gives a little huff as you move away. His head lolling slightly to the side, watching you with heavy lids, as you scramble out of the bed, leaving him missing your warmth.

His body feels heavy, lethargic. Like after a long day spent in the sun, at the beach. Like when he was a kid. When he would come home from learning to surf, his mom telling him to take a nap, but all he did was lay in his bed and stare out his window. This euphoric feeling washing over him. Sea and salt in his hair and sand between his toes. That feeling lingering most of the day, or at least until Neil got home from work.

His cigarette hangs loose in his fingers as he watches you, little one sided lazy smile across his lips. Can feel his pulse thrumming in his veins, and the hardness growing again between his thighs, watching your naked body across the room.

"The fuck you doing?"

He huffs.

"Come here, need you... I'm lonely."

He whines, lazily flicking ashes into the ashtray on the bedside table.

You turn around with your Polaroid SX-70 in your hands. An older model, but something about this bad boy made it your favorite camera and it was instant, and that was the most important part.

He drapes one arm over his eyes, shielding them from the sudden glare of the shifting sun, watching you through the gaps in his fingers.

"I told you to stay still. You looked so cute!"

You scold.

He moves his arms back to where it was before, laying lazily across your pillows. You come back to him and straddle his hips. The weight of your sexy body pressing against his in all the right places makes him hum, hand coming up and squeezing your waist to steady you. Suddenly wanting a repeat of what you two did not ten minutes ago.

"What, I don't look cute anymore?"

He smirks.

"Of course you do, silly. You always look cute. I just need a new picture of you."

You tilt your head, smiling down at him, not really asking permission, but waiting for him to give you an argument.

"Yeah, yeah... go ahead, take your picture."

He chuckles and you giggle.

Squirming around until you get him in the frame exactly where you want him. He was always too pretty for his own good. Such sleepy eyes, you think he might actually fall asleep at any moment, if you didn't know that he always looks that way, unless he's surfing or fighting... and even then sometimes.

"Stop rubbing your pussy all over me, unless you're hinting you're ready for round two, princess."

Cigarette bobbing in his mouth as he talks.

"Be patient, needs to be just right."

You say, finally pressing the shutter. The undeveloped film slipping out of the camera. You give the film a shake, fanning it in the air to hurry the process.

Billy grabs the camera from your hand.

"Gonna need one of you too, pretty girl."

Voice too deep and raspy, always makes your insides feel hot, and truth was hearing it over the phone just didn't hit the same as hearing it in person again.

"Okay, just don't get my boobs in the shot!"

You say, but you see that wicked little smirk creep up on his face.

"Princess, please... I'm a total gentleman."

He says.

"Bullshit."

You giggle, trying to swat his hands away when he reaches up and tugs on one of your nipples with his free hand, then full on giving your whole tit a rough squeeze and then jiggling it in his hand.

"Billy... you gonna take the picture or just feel me up."

You laugh and he does too.

You realize with this sharp ache in your chest how much you've missed that laugh. The real one, the one Billy gives you with his eyes and it hurts when you wonder about how many girls get to hear that laugh in Hawkins. You don't think they deserve it... it feels too personal, too much like that real laugh belongs only to you and him.

"Jesus, bouncing these things all around. You're a menace... sit still, would ya."

His laugh tapers off, his thumb sliding back down your waist, tracing slow along your hip, holding you steady. Squinting through the viewfinder, tilting the camera in a way that focuses on your pretty face yes, but of course he gets a full shot of your gorgeous tits as well.

The shutter clicks and the undeveloped photo slides out from the camera.

Gives a low chuckle and your eyebrows furrow at him.

"Let me see... my boobs better not be in that fucking picture, Billy Hargrove!"

You say, grabbing for the picture, watching as it slowly develops in your hand. As the colors bleed into view, the image staring back at you was actually really pretty. He managed to capture your face looking prettier than you thought you were, but the angle of the lens was low enough that the sun kissed curve of your breasts were the obvious star of the photo, framed perfectly in the soft glow of your room.

You sigh and give him a look.

"Seriously, Blue? I said no tits in the pic, what the hell!"

You pout.

"Come on baby, look at them. They're perfect. They don't make tits like these in Indiana."

Jerks his hips up and down off the bed, making you bounce on his lap, your tits jiggling again.

"You're such a perv."

You laugh and smack his chest with the photo.

"Is it a masterpiece, or do I need to take another one... or a bunch more."

Cocky grin plastered to his face.

"Don't you dare show this to anyone!"

You beg, turning it over so he can see the picture.

"Fuck baby... that's hot!"

He stares at it, biting his bottom lip.

"Billy... did you hear me? Please... don't show anyone else."

Your voice a little whiny, but you're serious. The thought of some random guys in Hawkins gawking over your tits was causing you a little anxiety.

"Nah... you know I wouldn't, baby... Just for me, I promise."

He takes the photo and sets it on the bedside table, then snubs out his cigarette in the ashtray.

"I don't even need a pic... this... this is what I see every time I close my eyes."

Grips your hips with both his hands, fingers flexing softly. The words leave his mouth before he can even think to filter them. Because with you, he's different.

Sure, he builds these walls around himself as a way of keeping safe, of never getting hurt again. But here, alone with you... admitting that you are what he sees in the dark... his respite in this mess of his life... it's a massive surrender. Feels good to hide it, even if you think he's an idiot.

"Don't look at me like that."

He laughs soft, his voice cracks slightly. Eyes wide, searching yours with this soft vulnerability that's rare for Billy.

You lean down, your lips touch his. Kissing Billy has always been all heat and tongue, sloppy and messy, teeth hitting teeth, but you feel him melt against your lips. The kiss soft and unhurried. His mouth moving against yours in slow, delicious drags, tasting each other.

"Leaving Cali has made you kinda cheesy."

You tease, mumbling against his hot mouth.

He chuckles.

"Ahh... you love it, all the girls do."

He teases back.

You sit up again, grabbing his arm and biting him hard on his forearm, leaving a little matching indent of teeth, like you left on his chest earlier.

"Fuck... what the hell!"

Laughs for real again.

"Can't help but talk about other girls even when you know I am the love of your life... don't make me bite you again, Hargrove."

You laugh, and stick your tongue out at him, then you kiss the spot on his arm where the impression of your teeth still sits.

His hands come up to your face. Pulls you close.

"I'm glad you're here, Billy."

You say, the words soft, barely a breath against his lips. They vibrate through him, settling deep in the hollow of his chest where loneliness usually sits.

"Yeah?"

He smiles, then says...

"Me too, baby."

His kisses you with a deep longing, tongue sweeping soft inside your mouth and your body is flooded all over again with a desperate urgency to have him and never let him go.

"Mmm... think this pretty little pussy feels a little left out... think she needs a kiss. Why don't you come sit on my face."

Purrs, his voice deep and throaty and you smirk, can't help yourself.

"Anything to shut you up."

You smirk, then awkwardly scoot up over his body, knees spread wide. Your hands grip the headboard as you straddle his face. He pulls you down impatiently, hands tightly gripping your thighs.

Billy buries his mouth between your legs with a low groan. The scent of you, this sweet feminine headiness that fills his senses, driving him mad with a hungry lust. His tongue pokes out and strokes through your folds, slow and teasingly, enjoying the flavor. His full lips wrap around your clit, suckling hungrily and you gasp, gripping the wood of the headboard tighter, your thighs instinctively squeezing against his big head.

"Fuck, mmm... missed my mouth, baby girl?"

Mumbles against your slit and you feel the vibrations on your swollen nub and you moan soft.

"Jesus, Bills... fuck, yes!"

You whimper, your belly feeling that familiar heat and you rut yourself against his face. His hands squeeze your hips, fingers digging into your softness. Pulls you down harder, hands sliding from your hips to your plush ass, squeezing and pushing you against his face.

Big nose pushed in deep, brushing deliciously against your swollen clit. His tongue laps long strips up your slit, then flicks your clit and starts over again with his nose.

"Like that, baby... Fuck, I missed this sweet little cunt so much."

Murmurs, fingers sliding deep into your heat, stretching you good, moving them fast. Finger fucking you good and hard while he suckles your clit.

"Mmm... feels so good, baby... gonna cum..."

It hits you fast.

You whimper and cry, moving your body against him, frantically. Billy's eyes close as your slick coats his lips, his chin and the tip of his nose. His hands helping to grind your cunt against him, smearing his pretty face with your wetness.

He hums, staying between your thighs for as long as possible, hidden away from the world between your beautiful thighs. Wish he could live here.

Both of you breathing heavily. You slowly move off him. His face a pretty mess, glistening, slow lazy grin plastered on his face.

You smile and watch him lick his lips.

"Yummy."

He gives you a little wink.

The gold light in your bedroom has changed, its shifted, turning from bright to a heavy orange, as the sun begins to set. Shadows playing long across your wooden floor.

For Billy, the changing light is like a countdown.

Every minute the sun dips lower, back behind the soft blue ocean, is a minute closer to the inevitable: the drive back to a place that isn't his, the silence in his car, the looming temper of Neil. Knows his father won't be happy about him disappearing after the funeral for hours.

He breathes in deep and long, then out slow. Breaks the warmth of the sheets and your body. Sits up, on the edge of the bed. His broad shoulders hunched as he stares down at the floor, running his hands through his messy curls.

"Don't want you to go. Maybe I can hide you under my bed until Neil gives up and goes back to Hawkins without you."

You say, rubbing his back.

Doesn't respond. Truth was he didn't want to miss you. Because missing you would just bring back that hole in his heart. Spent his whole life living in those empty spaces inside himself and he's tired of it. Just wants to feel love. To be loved. He's used to it though, and for some reason this time hurts worse than when he first moved away and he's not exactly sure why.

Turns, pulling your body close to his. Rests his forehead against yours, breathing you in. All of you. The vanilla scent of your skin, your pretty mouth, the shampoo that clings to your hair, can smell himself on you too.

"You'll be back though, right?"

You ask, softly, hopeful. Of course he will.

"You know it."

He smiles, eyes closed, forehead to forehead.

He stands up, moving around the room like his legs are made of lead. Finding the clothes you both tossed so casually around the room and into the hallway. You just sit there and try not to cry. Goodbyes are never easy, but this isn't goodbye to remind yourself.

You shiver, not because you're cold, just a little overwhelmed, sitting there naked, watching him gather his things, puts his briefs and jeans back on.

Grabs the Metallica t-shirt he was wearing earlier from off the hallway floor. Steps close, his warm hands guide your arms through the short sleeves, pulling the fabric down over you. It swallows you, the hem reaching your mid thigh, oversized and smelling strong of Billy, cigarettes, cologne.

There is this weird feeling in your chest. A sadness you can't explain. Just the overwhelming intensity of this whole afternoon, really the whole year. You want to grab him and never let go, pull him back to bed and pretend the sun never has to set.

The air outside is dry and cool, hitting your overheated bare legs after you walk him back down to your porch. You fingers interlaced with his, just like when he first came to your door just a few short hours ago.

Turns to face you. Your porch light comes on by itself, like it always does when the sun gets low enough in the sky. It casts you both in a soft glow. Those eyes, like a deep sea, a blue that changes tone depending on his mood. Can go from bright to stormy, warm to cool in a flash and right now they're deep and dark... pretty pools of indigo.

He cups your jaw, thumb running under your eye, wiping away a tear you didn't even realize was there.

"Call me. When you get home safe. We'll make plans. You can stay here once you're ready. You know my mom loves you."

You smile up at him.

"Yeah... you know I love your mom."

He chuckles, eyebrows dancing up and down.

"I'm serious... you can come and stay here."

You smile.

Billy knows he has a grind ahead of him. Working at the pool week days and part-time at the garage on weekends to save up enough money to get back here. Back to you.

"Gonna work my ass off to get here as fast as I can, baby."

Leans in and kisses you one last time, it's warm and taste like summer.

He pulls back first, squeezes your hand soft, then turning and walking towards his car.

"Blue... I love you."

You say to his back.

Standing there in just his oversized t-shirt, hair blowing soft in the summer breeze. Already missing the boy you said goodbye to months ago, having to say it all over again. You stand there, watching him through a blur of tears.

He stops, standing there for a beat.

"Love you too."

He says, turning back to look at you, soft little smile on his lips.

In a beat he's back in the Camaro, engine rumbling loud. That sound brining you instantly back to summers long ago. It vibrates through your bones.

You wave.

He shifts gear and you see his broad shoulders and pretty curls though the glass. You see his fingers lift slightly off the steering wheel, waving back.

You stay there until the moment the last flicker of his red tail lights vanish behind the trees.

Then the damn breaks and you cry like a baby.

The letter arrives on a Tuesday, a non day really... a mundane, boring Tuesday, but the moment your eyes catch the handwriting your heart skips a beat.

You've both been living for the phone calls, making plans. A few more months until he had enough money and could finally drive off, away from Neil, putting Hawkins behind him and coming home for good. The plans were set in motion. But sometime in July, he stopped calling and didn't call you back when you left messages. You thought maybe he just got busy with work, he was always working, so you didn't think much of it really. Figured he'd call you back when he got the chance. He'd be living here soon enough, and you could see him every day.

You sit with the letter and as you read, your vision blurs... the words not making sense...scrambling in your brain. The writing, feminine and neat, too pretty for what they were saying.

Starcourt Mall Fire

The paper shakes in your hand, the words smudging as the first hot stinging tears start to fall, hitting the paper.

Max's words, careful and guarded, though you can't possibly pick up on that. Like she wants to say more, a secret she can't quite tell you.... talking about a how Billy was a hero... some kids saved from a fire at the new mall... he was so brave... but all you really see are the words:

"Billy's gone."

Your boy Blue, eyes the color of the sea.

Maybe Billy just changed his mind and he's making poor Max do the dirty work of letting you down easy. Lie to you and make you think he's gone so you forget him. Move on. Maybe he didn't want to come back and didn't have the heart to tell you himself.

"Billy...."

The sudden gasp that tears from your lungs is violent, a sharp, jagged intake of air as your eyes snap open and you bolt upright. For a terrifying second you're still in the dark, your heart hammering, confused, your skin clammy with sweat.

"It wasn't real... wasn't real..."

You whisper to yourself.

The dream too vivid and heavy. You glance at the clock, 3 am. You grab the phone next to your bed, your hands shaking, you dial his number and wait... and then he picks up.

"What the hell... this better be important."

Billy's voice is low and sleepy over the line.

"Fuck... Billy... I had the weirdest dream... Billy..."

You cry and the soft whisper of your voice cuts through his sleepiness like a knife. You hear his voice shift.

"Hey... hey... easy baby... s'ok."

He murmurs.

"You need to come sooner than we talked about... please, Billy."

Your voice desperate.

He's quiet. Processing what you're saying. You can hear him breathing.

"Yeah... okay. I can do that. I can come sooner."

He says.

"Really? You promise me?"

You relax against the sheets.

"Yeah princess. I think I have enough money. It was just a dumb dream though... you know that, right?"

He mumbles.

"Just get your ass here, Blue. California misses you."

Your voice finally losing the anxiety, becoming calmer.

He chuckles low, it's warm and pretty against your ear and you feel happier than you ever have.

"Is that so, princess? Or is it just you that misses me?"

He says.

"Yeah... that too."

You smile in the dark.

You two talk for hours, until the first rays of orange light filter between your curtains and an exhaustion falls over you both.

You fall asleep with the phone in your hand, the warm hum of his breathing on the other end of the line and know he's real...

and you know he's coming home.

His vision vignettes as he pours another sugar into his styrofoam cup of coffee. He only likes two, but now he’s lost count, opening packet after packet just to give himself an excuse to stay here.

Morning light pours in through the open windows on the east side of the office building, bathing you in gold. You’re so bright and beautiful, Keys can hardly even look at you. 

Briana’s voice filters through his thoughts, tuning him back into the conversation. “I like him and everything, but the sex is just—I don’t know—”

“Bland?” you offer. 

Briana pauses, giving you a weighted look before correcting. “Silent.”

You make a sympathetic sound, oblivious to your eavesdropper, whose cheeks are turning a charming shade of pink. 

“There’s nothing worse than a silent man in bed,” you say, stirring your coffee. “I mean, we want to hear what we’re doing to them, you know? Like, moaning a little won’t kill them. And add in a little dirty talk? God, that shit never fails to get me off.”

Another sugar packet rips in his fingers and he pours without really thinking.

Good lord, this coffee is going to be undrinkable.

But the cup of joe is the literal least of his worries, since he’s shoving his hips up against the edge of the table just to keep from getting a hard at hearing you talk like that. You’re his co-worker. You sit across from him every day.

He can’t be getting hard at work. And especially, not right next to you. 

“Exactly!” Briana groans, enthusiastically. “So, I don’t know what to do about it.”

Keys’ head turns towards the open office floor, but his feet feel like they’ve grown roots, planting him right there in the dingy carpet, forcing him to listen. 

You hum, a familiar sound that means you’re thinking. “Well, if he’s into it, maybe listen to some spicy audios together? There are some really talented creators out there that can give you both some inspiration.”

He glances up just in time to watch Briana’s dark eyes cut over to you mischievously as she takes a sip. 

“Good idea,” she says, “I’m going to…” 

Somehow, Keys finally uproots himself and slips away with his cup of sugary bean water. 

He barely registers the rows of cubicles and windows swirling around him in colors of gray, blue, white, and black, too busy replaying your words over and over in his head.

…nothing worse than a silent man in bed.

…add in a little dirty talk?

…never fails to get me off.

His office chair squeaks under his weight and his glasses land on his desk with a clatter. Planting his elbows on his armrests, he breathes a deep sigh and scrubs his hands over his face. 

Focus, Keys. 

He replaces his glasses, and shifts forward in his chair, forcing his eyes back to his waiting code. The predictability of numbers—those never changing zeros and ones—usually settles him. But, not today. 

He tries hard to force all thoughts of you from his head but—oh, it’s useless. 

There you are, spread out on his navy sheets, writhing underneath him. His mouth trails soft kisses down your throat, over your shoulder, and lower…

You let out a needy whine, hands twisting up in his hair, legs parting for him on instinct. And in his imagination, he opens his mouth to say something hot—anything—but no words come. He wouldn’t know what to say. 

He has a few trademark moves in bed. I mean, who doesn’t? And the girls he’s been with always leave happy. 

But…is he silent? He doesn’t really know, actually. Never recorded himself…or anything…maybe he should—

“You good?” 

Your voice slams through his thoughts. The world whips back into focus, and Keys jumps in his chair. Suddenly, the overhead light’s too bright, and the AC feels like an icy blast, and you’re there, standing over your desk, staring at him with concern. 

“What?” He squeaks, then clears his throat. “Y-yeah. Yeah, of course, why wouldn’t I be?”

You shrug, and take your seat across from him. “I don’t know, you just look…tired, I guess.”

He just grunts and returns his gaze to his computer screen. “Just…work stuff.”

You hum in agreement and turn back to your screen as well. 

As much as he bitches about being shoved up in the corner of the office floor, the only space with a huge window immediately to his left, the spot really does have its perks. 

It’s annoying because it’s so bright he has to squint to see his screen most of the time. But the way the sun shines through the blinds, painting you in thin lines of shadow, lighting up your eyes and lashes?

He wouldn’t trade this spot for anything. 

Shit. Now he’s staring. 

Irritated, he forces his gaze away and pushes his glasses up higher on his nose. 

His hand finds his mouse and he navigates to his work, but for one fleeting second, his curser hovers over the new tab button. 

Now, Keys is a complete and total nerd, so, of course he’s no stranger to the internet. Especially the deep, dark parts of it. He’s fallen victim to those late night deep dives on reddit pages more times than he can count. And somewhere, in the back of his mind, he remembers coming across those ‘spicy audios’ you gushed about earlier. 

What did you call them? Talented creators? Which ones were you talking about? What things did they say? What did you like about it?

All it would take is a few clicks on his keyboard, and he’d get all those answers to his questions. But he quickly shakes his head to clear it and clicks back on his code with a guilty look over his shoulder.

The white wall stares at him, disapproving. 

What the fuck has gotten into him? He cannot be looking this shit up at work! 

He really has it bad.

When he’s back home, in the comfort of his own gaming desk, only then will he let himself investigate this newfound scrap of information on you. 

Later, he promises himself. Later. 

Well, it’s later. 

And Keys hasn’t got a single fucking line of code done yet. 

Which is why he’s stuck at work late, miserably trying to catch up on his project after everyone else has left for the day.

Everyone, that is, except for you.

Apparently, you also got behind, and you can’t afford to. Not with the new launch coming up.

Vinny came by to collect the trash a while back, and he didn’t see you in the back corner, so he turned off the lights, plunging you both into darkness. Neither of you have gotten up to turn them back on, choosing instead to work by the dim lights of your computer monitors. And even though the two of you keep saying you’re going to leave “any minute,” those minutes turn to hours, and you’re both still here. 

Alone.

The printer hums in the corner, and that blinking blue light on the side is driving Keys crazy. It keeps catching in the edge of his glasses, and the clicking of your mouse fills his ears. 

It’s constant. Unlike his. Which means you’re actually getting work done. Unlike him. 

Finally, your voice breaks the silence. 

“The street’s kinda loud tonight, isn’t it?”

Keys makes a noncommittal sound in this throat and doesn’t look up. 

Honestly, he hasn’t noticed the traffic humming far below the window, and he’s trying so hard not to look at you, not to think about you, that he doesn’t notice when you reach across over and grab his headphones by accident. 

It’s easy to get them confused. They look exactly the same, tangled up together at the edge of where your desks meet. Black. Standard issue. Company logo on the side. 

When Keys glances up and sees you with the headphones on, he sighs quietly in relief. 

It’s ridiculous, but up until this moment, he was hyper-aware of everything he was doing. Was he breathing too loudly? Could you hear his heartbeat? Was he readjusting himself too much when every thought of you in his bed gave him a hard-on? 

He tries to focus, he really does, but the numbers blur together on his screen. 

Music. 

That’s what he needs. 

He grabs the other pair of headphones, and when he settles them over his head, all he can hear is his own heartbeat slamming in his ears, reminding him of what a fucking loser he is. 

He should just ask you out. Like a normal person. But no. 

The foam cuffs press into the ear piece of his glasses, reminding him why he usually prefers the wired earbuds. But he’s lost them somewhere, and he can’t afford to go looking at the moment. 

The click of his mouse is silenced as he maneuvers it to pull up his music library. But, his cursor gets distracted on the way, hovering over that cursed new tab icon in the corner.

He risks another peek at you. 

Your brows furrow and you readjust your headphones, eyes still on your screen.

Resisting the urge to scrub a hand over his face in frustration, he turns his gaze back to his computer. If he’s honest with himself, he won’t be able to get any substantial work done until he satisfies his curiosity.

It’s risky, doing this at work. But there’s no way you can hear anything, and Keys is getting desperate. 

After a few hasty searches, he’s navigating the depths of…erotic audios. 

His eyes widen as he scrolls past the sprawling inventory of tropes and storylines. There are so many different kinds of fantasies, how would he know what you’re into? He leans in closer, scrolling carefully down the list until he hesitates on one in particular. 

Talk Nerdy To Me. 

The small blurb underneath catches his eye. 

Your tutor tries a new tactic to get you to study for your big test. Just how sexual can his acronyms get before you decide to study anatomy a different way?

His cursor hovers over the LISTEN NOW button. 

This is harmless enough, right? There’s even a little story. Like an audio book. Just way shorter. And way more explicit. And…yeah, this is so wrong, on so many levels. 

Beneath his conscience, however, sits a burning curiosity. Keys is analytic at heart. If there’s a question, he wants to find the answer. And, if listening to this will help him figure out what to say in bed…

Fuck it. 

The silenced click of his mouse through his headphones is as loud as a gunshot.

He waits, breath caught in his chest, heel tapping restlessly on the carpet as the little blue progress bar starts to move. 

But he doesn’t hear anything. 

He frowns and readjusts his headphones. 

Nothing. 

On impulse, he skips to the middle. Just in case there was a silent lull there at the beginning. 

Still nothing. 

He leans towards the screen nervously, and as he shifts, he glimpses you from behind your computer screen—and freezes. 

You’re staring at him, cheeks flush in the dim lighting, chest fluttering with every breath. 

And then, a small smirk begins at the corner of your mouth. It’s rueful and sinful, and… 

His stomach drops. 

Oh no. It’s in your headphones, isn’t it?

Oh, no, no, no, no—

His heart leaps in his chest as his hand flies to his mouse, scrambling to turn it off. 

Oh, God, where’s the stop button? 

There. That’s pause. Oh—he accidentally clicked it twice. Now it’s playing again. 

HOW DO YOU CLOSE THIS FUCKING THING?

You chuckle breathlessly, watching your genius coworker—who can code literally anything, by the way— flail around like a fish out of water when all he has to do is simply press the little red X on the top right of his screen. 

The mouse starts to slip around in his sweaty palm and Keys gives up, slamming the power button on his computer, and enveloping the both of you in silence. 

You stare at each other over your desks for a long second. 

Then, Keys rips his headphones off and rakes a hand through his hair. 

See? This is what he gets for being fucking curious. It gets him in trouble. He just needs to stick with what he knows—

He opens his mouth to apologize, to explain, to—beg for his dignity back? But you just slip the headphones down to hang around your throat and level his gaze with a soft smile. 

“Was that Bennett Brooks?” 

“W-what?” Keys croaks, shoving his glasses further onto his burning face. 

“I recognize the voice actor. Haven't heard his stuff in forever, though. He’s good—voice is a little raspy for my taste,” you shrug prettily. “But good.”

He swallows. “Oh.” 

The silent office presses in around you, so quiet he can almost hear your lashes click together when you blink at him. Suddenly, you whip his headphones off your neck and thrust them onto his desk. 

They land with a clatter. 

“Sorry,” you say. “I didn’t mean to take yours. By all means, don’t stop on my account.”

Keys lets out a choked sound, caught somewhere between a laugh and a cough. This is definitely making it into the top three most embarrassing moments of his life. 

“I’m n-not...” he stammers, “Not into that. Like…that.”

You shoot him a knowing look. “No?”

“No! Listen, I just—” he scrambles for an explanation as you just fucking sit there watching him. Smiling at him. “It was just research. Okay? Not a big deal—” 

The words barely escape his lips before he realizes his mistake. 

“Research?“ Your eyes light up and you lean forward in your seat. His eyes drop to the white V-neck button down you’re wearing—that third button you leave unfastened haunts him every single day. “Research is my specialty, Keys.”

Yes, he knows that. You’re a data analyst for the company. One of the best in the region, actually, wasting your time at the desk next to his. He should apologize again, or confess he overheard your conversation at the coffee bar. 

But the embarrassment burns hot, so instead, he clears his throat and hooks a finger in his shirt collar that’s currently suffocating him.

“It’s stupid, really,” Keys says at long last, and he hates how it comes out crackly. He clears his throat again, like that will help dislodge the panic in his chest. 

It doesn’t. 

You shrug, tilting your head in that cute way you do. “Didn’t sound stupid to me.”

You’re being so nice about it. Why are you always so nice?  “You know, I could help.” Your eyes linger on him and the air seems to grow ten degrees hotter. Then softer, you add, “…if you want.”

And just like that, all thoughts of project and deadlines glitch and vanish from his mind like a crashed browser. 

He’s nodding before he’s even really given it much thought.  

You smile and sit up in your chair. God, you’re radiant. “Okay. Let’s start with what exactly you want to research. Is it audios, specifically? Or—”

“No, no, it’s just…I think I…” Keys’ bottom lip catches between his teeth before he heaves out a heavy breath. “I want to get better. I guess.”

“Better at what? Sex?”

This time, Keys doesn’t hesitate. “Dirty talk.”

“Oh.” Your eyes flick to his lips for a split second before meeting his again. “Well, you’ve come to the right place.”

Keys adjusts in his chair, his dick is already twitching in his pants. “Yeah? So, you like this sort of thing? Guys’ voices dirty talking you and stuff. That…” He swallows hard. “Gets you off?”

You shrug again casually, like you’re talking about the weather. “It’s one way, yeah.”

Keys nods again. Too fast. Way too fucking fast. 

“So, do you have anyone in mind?” You ask. 

His pulse leaps. “What?”

“Well, you’ve got to be researching this for a reason, right? I mean, curiosity is a valid enough, don’t get me wrong. But is there someone…?” you trail off, unsure of how to finish. 

A silent moment stretches out between you as Keys decides how to answer. The digital clock on the wall, the rise and fade of the passing lights, all seem to look between you—waiting for something. 

Finally, Keys sighs. “Well, there is this girl.”

“Aha!” You lean your elbows on your desk, eyes brightening with interest. “Tell me.”

“It’s new. Like—” he chuckles, averting his gaze. “Really new. So.”

“It’s okay, Keys. We’re friends! We can talk about this kind of stuff.”

“I know!” he says defensively, although he’s not really sure why. “She’s just…into this sort of thing. Dirty talk. I think.”

“You think.”

“Yeah.”

You nod slowly, encouraging, if not a little teasing. “Okay…so, give me the rundown here. When’s your next date?”

“Uh. First one, actually. And…it’s…Thursday,” Keys stammers. 

“Thursday? Okay.” You look out the window. A passing car’s headlights shine across your face for a second before the computer light consumes you again. “Lucky girl. Where are you taking her? I mean—before the inevitable trip back to your place.” You swallow hard and busy yourself with re-organizing your pen cup as he scrambles for an answer. 

Chinese. 

You love that. 

He knows because the one time he picked you up for work when your car was in the shop, he caught a glimpse of your apartment through your front door. Your coffee table was littered with little takeout boxes, and he filed that away like a crow picking up a shiny screw and calling it a treasure. 

Yeah, he has it bad. 

“Uh. I was thinking that Chinese joint on the corner of Cross and Elm."

Your jaw drops. “I love that place!”

“Yeah,” he chuckles, raking a hand through his hair. “Yeah, I know.”

When you look up at him again, there’s a hint of a smile on your lips.

“Okay, so, we have three days to prepare you. What questions do you have?”

Leave it to you to make this sound like a standardized research paper. Well, now’s a good a chance as ever. He might never get this chance again.

Keys straightens in his chair, heel tapping the carpet so fast his leg is bouncing. 

“What do you—do girls,” he quickly corrects himself, “—want guys to say?” 

You frown. “What do you mean?”

Heat rushes to his face. “I mean, like, do they tell you how to…touch yourself? I don’t—I can’t even—”

“You’re overthinking it. There’s no magical combination of words to use." You gesture to his computer. "Here, let’s listen to the audio, it’ll help me explain—”

“Oh, no! We don’t have to do that!” Keys squeaks. 

You shoot him a look. “You said this is for research, right?”

“Yeah! Obviously. Totally.”

“Then you can’t half-ass it. If you really want to learn how to dirty talk for this girl, you gotta commit.”

He hesitates. 

“C’mon, Keys.” Your teeth close over the end of your pen and you gesture to his computer with your eyes, smirking as you settle into your chair. “Press play.”

Fuck. 

Your coworker, Keys, has been acting weird as fuck all day, and now you finally know why. 

He totally overheard your conversation with Briana at the coffee bar, earlier. 

Maybe it had something to do with the way you raised your voice on purpose, hoping to get through that head of hair and those brown eyes that seem to see everything except all the signals you’ve been dropping his way since you first started here. 

From behind your desk, you watch him eye the power switch on his computer like it’s some gigantic red button that says ‘don’t touch’ or else it will somehow World War III. 

Come to think of it, you might start World War III if it means getting your oblivious-as-he-is-cute-coworker to finally make a real move. 

Still, though, there’s a part of you that feels for the guy. He’s so nice, and good, and sweet, and fuck if you don’t want him to corrupt him a little.

Only in the ways he wants to be corrupted, of course. Which, apparently, involves digging into ancient audio porn on reddit after work hours. 

Oh, you are so into it. 

“Why are you so embarrassed, Keys?” you say gently. “Look, this is normal, okay? Being curious. And you want to make this girl feel good, right?”

The girl has to be you.

After all those coffees he’s brought you from that fancy place that he insists only adds three minutes to his commute, but in reality, probably adds, like, twenty? And the way his hand accidentally finds ways to brush yours, and then he acts as if he’s not jumping out of his skin at the contact?

If this girl is not you, then this crush you have on your nerdy, hot co-worker is about to be devastating. 

Keys blows out a breath. “Okay, fine.” 

His computer powers up with a familiar hum, and blue light cascades over his features again. 

God, he looks nervous. Why is that such a turn-on?

He looks so alone over there behind his desk as one lock of his brown hair falls over his eyes, brushing the rim of his glasses, when suddenly, you get an idea. 

“Wait, actually, no—” you mutter, standing up from your chair. 

Keys jumps like you’ve shot him. “Yeah,” he says, scrambling to turn distract himself with something else on his computer. “Yeah! No, we don’t—this is—”

“—I’m coming over there.”

“What?” Keys’ gaze snaps to yours. Then, he gestures to the space beside him in his workspace. “Here?” 

But you’re already rolling your chair over the carpet and behind his desk. It’s a tight fit, with these ergonomic chairs. Their wide armrests knock together as you slide in beside him. 

Keys’ cubicle is different. 

Technically, it’s the exact same as yours. The dimensions are the same, as well as your surroundings, but it smells like his cologne, and there’s that stack of board games he keeps hidden under his desk. 

“Okay,” you sigh, settling back in your chair. “If we’re going to do this, we do it right. Which means, starting from the top. Clearly, you know nothing of the subject—”

“I—” he starts, but you shoot him a look that has his jaw snapping shut. 

“Now, dirty talk is a broad subject, so, what kinds of things are you into?”

Keys shrugs. “I don’t know. I guess, it depends on what she’s into. I mean…” He threads his fingers behind his head and leans back in his computer chair in an obvious attempt at casualness. “What are you into?”

Smooth. Real smooth. 

You decide to go along with it. 

“I like a little of everything. Praise, instruction, degradation, fantasizing…but not every girl is the same—”

“Okay, let’s just do that, then,” he cuts you off, nodding once like it’s been decided. 

You have to bite your lip to keep from smiling. “Okay, I’ll press play.” 

You shift lean forward and your palm closes over his mouse. It’s slightly damp, like Keys’ fingers were clammy when he last touched it. 

“Wait!” His hand shoots out and grabs your wrist. “Like…out loud?”

You gesture to the darkness beyond. “Keys, no one is here.”

“No, I know, but…” his eyes sweep the empty floor, shoulder hunched to his ears. “Okay fine, just do it.”

You nod and turn back to the monitor. “We’ll just pick up where you left off, okay?”

“Oh. I didn’t—”

Bennet Brook’s voice cuts him off, filtering through Keys’ computer speakers with that deep, raspy voice of his. 

“—was pretty good. Okay, now let’s do the carpal bones. I have a mnemonic for this, actually, you want to hear it? Okay. Some Lovers Try Positions That They Can’t Handle. Yeah, it’s a little…suggestive? It just—it helps people remember okay? Yes! The sluttier the better. Look, it goes from thumb to pinky proximally, then pinky to thumb distally. Here, I’ll show you…”

You risk a glance over at Keys. He sits perfectly still, breath bated as Bennett leads the listener through the scene. 

“Now you’re getting distracted,” Bennet laughs breathlessly. “What positions do I—I’m trying to help you study. Oh my god, you’re so annoying. Look. If I answer, will you study? Yeah? Okay, fine. My favorite is—”

You reach forward and press pause. The silence in the office rushes in to fill the empty space, and your stomach swoops as you turn to Keys. 

“What’s your favorite sex position?” you ask abruptly. 

He looks at you, eyes wide. You don’t miss the way his knuckles whiten around his arm rest, clearly doing that thing where he resists the urge to push his glasses up again out of habit.

“What does this have to do with—”

You sigh. “Just trust me, and answer the question.”

“Uh…missionary?”

“God, okay.” You roll your eyes and reach over to hit resume again. “That’s such a lie, but whatever.”

Keys stops you with that hand on your wrist again. “Wha—lie?”

“Yes. Lie.”

He finally turns to face you, incredulous. “Oh, and you’re suddenly an expert on what I like in bed?”

Heat shoots down your spine at his words, but you just scoff. “You play as a fucking stripper cop in Free City. Now, tell me the real answer.”

After a moment Keys groans, then looks away. “I don’t know the word for it. Like, the name, or whatever.”

“Oh! That’s not a problem.” 

You reach for his keyboard, and before he knows what’s happening, you’re opening a new tab, and then, right in front of him, is a list of sex positions. 

With pictures. 

“Jesus!” He hisses, looking over his shoulder as if the wall behind you is somehow going to open up and reveal your boss or something. “I’m going to have to scrub my search history clean after this.”

“Relax,” you say, settling back in your chair. “Now, point.”

Keys lets out a heavy, resigned sigh and sits forward, squinting at the screen. Ten seconds later, he shakes his head. 

“It’s not there.”

When he looks over at you, he immediately rolls his eyes, because the look on your face is the clearest I-told-you-so look he’s ever received. 

“God, with how freaky you are, Keys, it’s a wonder you’re silent in bed—”

“Hey!” He interjects, glaring over at you. “I never said—woah, okay, why are you standing up? What are you doing?”

You plant hands on your hips, looking down at him. “Look, just maneuver me into whatever position it is, and I’ll find the name of it for you.”

“This is ridiculous.”

You huff. “This is a part of the research. If you don’t want my help, that’s fine, we—”

Without looking, he reaches out and grabs your waist. The warmth of his skin bleeds through your thin work shirt and a surprised squeak escapes you as he tugs you down.

You land in his lap with an undignified plop, facing him. Your stomach plummets as his knee presses against your core, but he makes a disgruntled sound, and grabs your thigh, pulling one leg up and over until you’re straddling him. 

Your pulse hammers in your ears as you steady yourself with your hands on his shoulders and peer down at him. 

The dim blue glow of the computer reflects in his glasses and as his gaze meets yours, his expression makes your chest ache. There’s something so sweet there. Soft. Like flower petals against your skin. Fragile, too. 

“This is it?” you whisper.

A small smirk crosses his lips. 

“Okay, so, this is just straddling…” you say, but your voice trails off as his hands spread over your waist. They’re so big. How have you never noticed how big his hands were before?

You swallow hard. “Or, I think, it’s technically called seated cowgirl.”

“Really?” he asks, squinting up at you with a hint of cockiness you could get drunk on.

In your next breath, Keys’s fingers dig into your hips, and he spins you around on his lap. His chest is warm against your back, and his computer desk digs into your belly. You wiggle your hips back slightly to get away from the sharp edge, but still when his hard length presses into your clothed core. 

“What’s this one called?” He asks. His voice is deeper now, threaded with heat, and it makes your hands clench against the cool metal of his desk. 

“Reverse seated cowgirl,” you say, fighting to keep your tone even. “So, this is your favorite? Tell me why.”

His breath stalls in his chest, you can feel the way he hesitates against your spine.

The printer hums in the far corner of the office, and a car horn blares distantly from the street below. 

After a long moment, he exhales, and his breath ghosts over your ear, making your lashes flutter. 

“I like the view,” he admits softly. “Painted in blue-light, all needy—” Then, he lets out a quiet, “Fuck.”

Heat pools deep in your belly. He sounds…wrecked. Already. And you’re just sitting in his lap fully clothed. 

God, you could make this man beg. 

You tilt forward and look over your shoulder. His eyes lift to yours, then drag down to your mouth, your hips, and his bottom lip disappears between his teeth.

“What else?” you whisper.  

He doesn’t hesitate this time. “I like the control of it, you know? Like—” he huffs out a quiet laugh, like he can’t believe he’s saying these things. “Like maybe I’m just playing a video game, and making you keep my cock warm. And you just… just have to sit there and take it.”

His words—so filthy and shy—stir hot embers of arousal between your hips. 

“Shit, Keys,” you say with a breathless laugh. “That was so good!”

His eyes meet yours again. “Really?”

“Yeah. Okay, I’m pushing play again. I’ll skip forward a little, too, just so we get to the good stuff.”

He clears his throat. “You’re going to stay right here?” He taps your leg and his fingers linger on your skin. 

You pretend to jolt in his hold. “Oh! Sorry, I can move if you—”

“No, no,” he shakes his head. “It’s fine.” 

‘It’s fine’, he says, as if he’s not raging hard underneath you, holding onto your leg like he might die if you slid off him right now. 

He’s too easy. 

You press play. 

Immediately, sounds of kissing and rustling fill the room. Keys inhales sharply, his erection growing against your ass, and you barely resist the urge to grind down on him. 

“That’s it,” Bennet croons. “You take it so good for me, baby. Fuck, you’re incredible.”

The wet sound of hips meeting has Keys’ mouth dropping open. His eyes dart off the screen, like watching the loading bar is somehow equivalent to seeing these imaginary people fuck. 

“That’s praise,” you whisper over your shoulder. “Obviously.”

Keys looks at you, then. Really looks at you. You can feel the way he takes in the slight shift of your hips as you try to find some friction to release the building ache. 

He’s reading you. Analyzing the data. Recalculating.

Classic Keys. 

The sight pulls at something in your chest. Truthfully, that’s the reason you like him so damn much, the reason you’re pulled to him like a ship to a lighthouse. 

Because with Keys, you would be fully, and utterly known. 

“…always so needy?” Bennet groans. “Just wanna be bent over a desk and fucked, huh, baby? This what you need? So dirty, I swear to God.”

“Degradation,” you murmur, turning back to the computer. 

Bennett keeps going. “Oh yeah, just like that? C’mon, baby. Tell me what you want. Use your words.”

 “Instruction,” Keys says, beating you to the punch. 

You’re grateful your back is to him so he can’t see your self-indulgent smile. 

“…thought about this a lot,” Bennet groans, the sound effects growing faster and louder. “Like in the library on campus? When we’re trying to study but you’re sitting across from me, and I can’t focus…”

Your breath catches at the exact same second Keys goes still beneath you. 

“…I see it, you know. The way your hand brushes mine when you hand me a pencil. You think I don’t notice? Fuck—of course I’ve thought about you. Are you kidding? Every time I jerk my cock I think about you. How you’d sound when I’m fucking up into you like this. Oh, you like that, huh? Get you so cock drunk— oh, baby, that’s it—”

You swallow hard, mouth suddenly gone dry. 

That’s fantasizing.

But for some reason, you can’t even bring yourself to repeat it. To solidify it. To make it any realer than it already is. 

Can Keys tell how much you relate to Bennett's words? That every time you’re in bed at night, thoughts of him keep you up late, you’re rubbing your aching cunt, whining his name into the empty ceiling?

You’re soaking through your underwear now, but mostly from listening to Keys’ uneven breathing behind you. His fingers flex over and over against your work skirt, like he can’t quite get up the courage to slip them under the hem that’s riding up your bare thighs. 

In an effort to relieve his aching erection, Keys shifts in his chair. It’s a small enough movement, but it’s just enough to send his elbow into a cup on his desk. It falls with a dull thud, the water inside instantly soaking into the carpet.

You smack the space bar on his keyboard, cutting Bennet off mid-moan, and leap to your feet. 

Keys cringes and moves to stand, but you disappear behind your desk before he can blink, and reappear a second later with a roll of paper towels. 

“Here,” you say gently as you kneel in front of him. “Let me.”

Keys reaches down at the same time you raise up on your knees, and when you lift your chin, you find your faces only an inch apart. 

He doesn’t jerk back like you expect. Instead, he just finds the paper towel on the ground and gently pries your fingers off it, resuming the blotting himself. 

Your hands find purchase on his knees for balance, and they spread wider under your touch, almost subconsciously. 

Almost. 

You swallow. “Keys?” 

His shoulder muscles flex under his T-shirt as he works. “Yeah?”

“Do you want to keep listening to the audio…or…do you want to practice?”

“Practice?” He doesn’t look up, but his voice cracks. 

“Only if you want.”

Keys sits back into his chair, tossing the wet paper towel into the nearby waste basket. Then his eyes settle on you for what feels like the first time all night. 

Through his work khakis’, his erection presses an angry imprint. God, it looks so hard it probably hurts, confined like that. The air between you shimmers with that unsaid tension, the kind that releases butterflies in your stomach and in the chambers of your heart. 

But while exciting, it’s equally terrifying, putting yourself on display like this. You feel strangely vulnerable, even though you were just teasing him a few seconds earlier. 

“What are you thinking about right now?” you ask, voice soft. 

Keys looks away, jaw clenching. 

Suddenly, you wonder if you’ve misread this. Have you made him uncomfortable? What if there actually is a girl, and it’s not you, and you’ve just—

“Your mouth,” Keys says, cutting off your thoughts. 

Hope renewed, your gaze snaps to his. 

“Where?” 

He rakes a hand through his hair, and his glasses slant adorably on his nose with the motion. His chest rises and falls once, twice, and then he whispers, “My cock.”

God, just hearing him say that makes your panties slick. 

“Good,” you breathe. “Now, put it together.”

He huffs, a surprised laugh slipping from him before the heat returns to his gaze.  “I’m thinking about your mouth on my cock.”

The damp carpet fibers dig into your knees as you watch his Adam’s apple bob on a swallow.

“Do you want me to do that?” you ask carefully. 

There’s a certain irreversible tension sitting between you right now. It feels a little like waiting behind an ancient door, not sure if it will creak open and invite you in or vanish into a cloud of dust. 

After a long moment, Keys nods.

A triumphant thrill zips through you, but you keep yourself together and hold his gaze. “You have to say it—”

“Fuck, I want it.” The words rush out of him in a gasp, like they’ve been sitting behind his teeth, waiting their turn the whole night. “I want my cock in your mouth. Please.”

He’s barely got the words out before your fingers fly to his zipper. 

“Forgot about begging,” you mutter more to yourself, but he hears you anyway. 

How could you have forgotten that very important category of dirty talk? It’s one of your favorites, and it flew from his lips unprompted. 

He’s perfect. 

“W-what about the—cameras,” he protests weakly, even as his hips lift from the chair to help you slide his pants down his thighs. 

“The cameras don’t reach back here,” you assure him.

Hooking a finger in the band his underwear, you pull them down and reveal his cock. It sits hard and heavy against the happy trail on his lower stomach.

He sputters. “W-what? Wait—really? How do you know that?”

It’s only natural, digging into dark spots in the security systems at a new job. Especially when you have a coworker as hot as Walter McKeys.

Instead of answering, though, you shuffle forward and take him in your hands. His head tips back on a ragged groan and you relish the hot, velvety feel of him. It’s long and hard, and somehow, you always knew Keys would have a big dick. 

It’s always the nerds. 

Your pussy throbs, fluttering around nothing as you imagine him easing his length inside your slick core, whispering in your ear, telling you how well you’re doing, how much he’s wanted this. 

Keys sits ramrod straight, breathing sharply through his nose as you let your hands explore him. You stroke him from base to tip, fondle his balls, then reach down and palm his thighs. His stomach flexes beneath his shirt, and on impulse, you reach up and lift it until the fabric bunches just below his ribs. 

Soft tummy with muscles flexing underneath. A dark happy trail leading down. A glimpse of thicker hair littered across his chest. 

God, he’s delicious. 

What you wouldn’t give to have this man naked in your bed right now. Saliva builds in your mouth at the thought.

Can you die by horniness? Better research that later. 

You stroke him firmly a few times, and when you lean down, he groans softly.  

Glancing up, you search for any sign to stop, but his eyes aren’t on yours anymore.  They’re glued to your chest. 

You tilt your chin down to see what he’s looking at. 

The three unfastened buttons of your work shirt give him a clear view of your cleavage, and the glow of the computer monitor illuminates the dips and valleys prettily.

A relieved gasp escapes his chest as your hands start undoing the rest of the buttons. He nods as if you read his mind when your shirt falls open, revealing your black bra. 

Thank God it’s your cute one. Not lingerie by any means, but your nipples harden under his gaze, poking against the fabric. 

You keep your shirt hanging loosely over your shoulders, just in case someone were to walk in. Although very unlikely, the thought of getting caught with Keys still shoots a wicked jolt of pleasure through you. 

Wordlessly, you run your hands up his legs again until your fingers find his cock and resume your attention. 

Keys says something—more like whines it—but it’s too quiet for you to hear. The carpet presses into your knees as you lean in. His thick thighs bracket your shoulders, and when your breath ghosts across the head of his cock, they go hard as rocks. He makes a muffled sound in the back of his throat, then clears it roughly. 

You lean back to catch his eye. 

“Whatever your voice, or breath, wants to do…just let it happen,” you say. “Don’t worry about being loud, there’s no one here.”

He nods, drunk on the sight of you, desperate for your mouth. 

When those big hands reach down and gather your hair, you tilt your head back with a whimper. 

You scoot even closer, close enough to tap his dick against your lips with a soft smack. When you blink up at him, Keys curses under his breath, then stops himself. 

“Stop swallowing it down,” you chide. “Let me hear.”

Before he can say—or do—anything, you lick a broad, wet stripe up his length. His hips jerk in your hold, a ragged moan tumbling from his lips, unabashed. Your eyes shine with pride when you look up at him. And fuck, he’ll do anything to see that look again. 

You stroke him lazily. Like you have all the the time in the world here in the office after hours. Like you’ve been thinking about it for a long, long, time. 

Drool pools in your mouth as you coat him with your tongue. Then, your lips wrap around him and you slowly work your way down, inch by inch, listening to his whimpers, feeling the way his body vibrates underneath you. 

He’s still holding himself back, so you draw back up and suck gently on his tip before popping off him.

“Sorry,” he gasps. “Fu-forgot I was supposed to talk.”

You nod. “That’s okay. How do you like it?”

He starts to respond, but you envelop him in your warm, wet mouth again, and all words die on his lips. 

“Feels so good, I can’t—can’t—mmmph,” he groans as you relax your jaw and take him deeper, then whimpers pitifully when you come off him again. “My brain’s fried. Like, actually short circuited. I can’t think—”

You press your tits together and tilt your head. “It feels good, right?”

He chuckles, a ragged soft sound. “Fuck—yeah.”

“Just talk to me, then,” you murmur, fluttering your tongue along the ridge of his cock as it twitches in your hold. 

Something seems to click in his mind at those words, and his eyes harden as he stares down at you.

“You want to know why I’m always so tired?” he says, chest heaving. “I stay up all night, trying to get the work done I should be doing when I’m sitting at my desk. But I can’t. Because I’m—fucking hard—all the damn time. Because of you!”

You decide to reward him for that little speech—a great example of fantasizing and degradation—and relax your jaw again, sliding him deep into your throat. Deeper than before. Keys throws his head back on a groan. The stretch brings tears to your eyes, but you blink them back so you can look at him properly. 

His hair looks so pretty illuminated in soft streaks of blue from the computer, and gold from the street far below. Like a painting. 

Arousal floods your core, coating your underwear, and you can feel your clit pulsing in time with your heartbeat. 

You slide up and off of him to breathe and he inhales with you, like that took his breath away as much as it did yours. 

“Can’t stop thinking about what you’d feel like under me,” Keys pants. He watches you with heated eyes as you suck on his tip, stroking the rest of him steadily with both hands. “Or—or on top of me. What you’d t-taste like.”

Without thinking, you shove two fingers past your waistband, and straight through your soaked folds. The contact has you moaning around his cock, sending a sharp jolt of pleasure down his spine. 

Then, you slowly withdraw them. They glisten in the glow of the monitor as you raise them up to his face, and Keys wastes no time leaning forward and capturing them in his mouth. His tongue strokes up to your knuckles eagerly, and as the first taste of you floods his mouth, it seems to unlock something in him. Some rusty, spider-web filled, creaking lock shoves open. 

“Aghhh yeah,” he moans when you withdraw your fingers and suck him deep again. “That’s how I like it. However you do it, that’s how I like it, baby. Holy fuck.” 

Your eyes actually roll back at that, and your hand flies down to circle your clit without thinking. 

His eyes track the movement and he chuckles darkly. “Oh, you like that? You like hearing how well you’re doing?”

You whimper. Fuck, yeah, you do.

He bucks underneath you, like your mouth is just the best thing he’s ever felt in his life. “Just—fucking—on your knees for me? Shit."

Your eyes slide shut, lost in the salty taste of him as his precum mixes with your spit. His hand leaves your head and reaches down to tap your chin. 

“Eyes on me, baby,” he rasps. Your eyes flutter open in surprise. “Good girl.”

You swallow around him in response and his jaw drops. He grips your hair again on instinct and you moan in encouragement as he starts to push you gently up and down his shaft. 

“Is t-this okay?” he asks, breath ragged. 

You nod, lashes fluttering as he hits that soft spot at the back of your throat. 

Truth is, you love this. 

Taking your rigid, calculating co-worker and turning him into something needy and honest. He’s wild, but with an edge of control. And somehow, you just know Keys could take you to the brink and keep you there like no other. 

You hollow your cheeks as he grinds in and out of your wet mouth, pulsing against your tongue and spitting out the filthiest words you’ve ever heard him say in your months of working across from him. 

You rub your throbbing clit faster, and he blinks down, watching you touch yourself to the feel of him in your mouth for all of three seconds before he’s yanking up on your hair. 

Your scalp tingles as you disobey his silent order, determined to have him spilling in your mouth. His base is slick against your puffy lips, and he damn near chokes on his tongue when your nose hits his stomach. 

“Holy—I’m gonna come,” he grunts, hips bucking. “Shit—baby, you’ve gotta—do you—”

He breaks off with a ragged moan as you grip his thighs and swallow around him—and then he’s spilling down your throat. 

His abs tense and release over and over in your view, and the view is so intoxicating, you’re only a few seconds away from your own release when he finally slips from your drooling mouth.

You don’t know what you expected him to do when he finished. Maybe probably crawl back into that shy, nice-guy, missionary shell of his. Instead, when his chin falls to his chest, his soft brown eyes have gone molten. He reaches down and pulls his pants back up, tucking himself back into his briefs, but he doesn’t bother with the zipper. 

“C’mere,” he demands, grabbing you by the wrist and yanking you up. Your legs wobble, but he catches you easily and pulls you down into his lap. “Ride my thigh.”

Your mouth drops open. “Ride your—”

“You heard me.”

In one smooth motion, he plunges a hand under your skirt and yanks your panties down your legs. His knuckles brush your wet folds and you gasp against him, grinding down instinctively against his knee. 

“Look at you,” he whispers. “Taking instructions. Soaking through my pants like that? Fuck yeah.”

Your breasts heave as you try to catch your breath, but now, you start to wonder if maybe you’ll just be in an oxygen debt forever at this point. Because with the way he’s looking up at you right now, there’s no way you can breathe. 

Your hips roll smooth and fast, and when he shifts his leg up slightly, meeting your movements, sparks shoot up your spine. Your head drops back, eyes slipping shut, but Keys is quick to pull your gaze back to his with a hand around the nape of your neck. 

He clicks his tongue. “No, I want to watch you. Wanna see you fall apart for me.”

“God, Keys,” you pant, “you’re a quick learner, I’ll give you that—”

He cuts you off by pinching your nipple through your bra, and when he grabs a handful of your bare ass under your skirt, your lungs officially forget how to expand. 

“Please,” you beg. “Keys—”

His hands fly to your hips, helping you rock back and forth on him. “What is it? What do you need? Need me to touch you?”

You whimper. “Yes.”

“Tell me where.”

You grab his hand and guide it under your skirt, but he pulls back at the last second. 

“That’s not telling me.”

“Oh, fuck you,” you laugh, breathless and irritated. 

He smiles, then. And it’s positively radiant, white teeth winking in the dim light. 

“C’mon, use your words, or else I’ll have to stop,” he warns. 

But you’re not listening, because at that moment, he dips his head and captures your aching breast in his mouth, pulling a deep moan from your throat and putting an arch in your back. 

Your thighs burn, hips slowing to devastatingly desperate swivel in order to keep his mouth on you. The threads of his pants are warm and completely soaked through underneath you, and he’s licking and sucking your breasts like he’s trying to find a way to imprint his smell, his taste, onto your body.

The duel stimulation feeds that sprawling drive for more. Tremors start to run through your hands, making them claw restlessly at his shoulders and dive into his hair as your orgasm grows closer. 

Suddenly, Keys pulls back. He ignores your whine of protest and blinks up at you from behind his glasses. Your tongue darts over your bottom lip as your eyes drop to his mouth. 

His perfect…perfect fucking mouth. Soft lips, parted just slightly as he breathes heavily beneath you. The timber of his voice reverberates against your stomach as he talks. God, it’d be so easy just to lean in and press your mouth against his, feel that gentle glide of his tongue against yours…

Wait, is he saying something? You can’t fucking think—

“…not going to tell me, I have to stop.”

It’s only when his hands leave your body that the world slows to a stop. 

Cold air rushes in where his hands just were. Now you’re just needy and wet, grinding down on his pants leg in the middle of a dark office. 

“W-what?” you ask dumbly.

He shrugs. “I told you what would happen if you didn’t use your words.”

Your brain feels foggy, like your thoughts are traveling through a cloud, all the blooding your body pooled in your clit instead. 

“But I...” you whimper, “But, what—”

He rolls his eyes. 

“But I—but Keys—I just—” he mocks you, voice going higher on his register, and your mouth drops open in shock. 

He smirks at the look on your face and tucks a stray piece of hair behind your ear. “What? you thought I wasn’t serious? You made me do all this—and don’t tell me you didn’t enjoy it. I watched you getting off on the power trip of it all, and now it’s my turn. So, go ahead. Tell me what you want me to do to you."

Where the fuck did your nerdy, shy coworker go? And who have you turned him into? Your breasts heave in his face as you blink down at him, but he doesn’t so much as glance at them. 

“I’m right here,” he urges. “Go ahead. Ask for it. Anything you want, I’ll give it to you.”

After a moment, you finally find your voice. 

“I-I want you to touch me.”

His hands instantly resume their place on your hips and your breath shutters in relief. 

Then he leans in, lips ghosting over your jaw. “That wasn’t so hard, huh? Where do you want to come? On my fingers?”

“Yes!” The word leaves your mouth broken and desperate. 

He hums. “Put it together.”

You exhale sharply, panting towards the ceiling in frustration. “Walter, I want you to finger fuck me until I come.”

He smiles against your throat. “Good girl.”

His hand finds your clit immediately and he rubs tight, hot circles that have your back arching.  

“Oh, God, don’t stop!” you beg. 

Your shirt slips from your shoulder and then his mouth is there, kissing the soft skin like he’s trying to memorize the shape of it. 

The muscles deep in your core flex with your impending pleasure and you writhe against him desperately. Through it all, his hands stay steady, never wavering. Constant, and grounding. 

You raise up on shaky legs as his two middle fingers circle your entrance and your pelvis tilts, eagerly seeking that internal friction. 

He presses in, just a little, and your body welcomes him greedily. The sound of his fingers disappearing inside you making him groan out a slurred curse. 

“Shit, baby—both at once? So wet for me, oh my God.” 

When his fingertips brush that spongey spot that makes you see stars, your chest vibrates with your moan. The pressure on your clit is too much, and not enough, and everything all at once—it’s overwhelming. It's perfect. 

Your hips snap into his palm, driving his fingers deeper and he lets out a choked sound as you whine, needy and breathless. 

“There you go. That’s it,” he murmurs into your neck. His glasses knock into your throat as you tip your head back to give him better access. “Take what you need.”

That white-hot band of pleasure finally snaps as you clench around his fingers, and your orgasm rushes through you in a torrential wave of bliss. Keys helps bring you down with soft kisses to your chest, thumbs tracing circles into your thighs as you collapse on top of him. 

“Holy shit,” you gasp, running a hand through your hair, gazing down at him through heavy lids. “That was…”

“Good?” he asks eagerly. 

You smile. “Perfect.”

And you mean it. You really do. 

His fingers brush over your bare shoulder and your breath catches again as your eyes connect with his. The stoplight on the street below turns green, reflecting in his glasses, and because you can’t help it, you smirk down at him. 

“So, about this girl...” he murmurs. 

Your stomach flips. “Yeah?”

“This date—”

“Yeah?” you say again, eagerly, cutting him off. 

As you stare at each other, chests heaving, faces flush, a laugh builds behind your ribs. 

He clears his throat. “I was kinda hoping…you’re free Thursday? I was thinking about that place on Elm and Cross—”

“Fuckin’ knew it,” you murmur, and the rest of his words die against your mouth as you lean down and kiss him. 

a/n: Oh, hi. So, the way I feel about this fictional man, is actually pretty close to the actual definition of feral. Also, I just want to say, there are many more kinds of dirty talk out there, but these categories just fit the plot lol

Also everyone blame Jules (@tellcherhesgone) for putting this idea in my head, because she posted one thing about Keys definitely knowing what GoneWildAudio is, and that shit stuck with me lol

keys taglist: @emotionallyaslut , @subtlesposts, @oliviaharrington, @drifting-daydream, @dracomalfoypilled , @mysticfluffyness

❄️ December - 1 Week Later ❄️

You're sitting at the front nurse's station going over your assignments for the next morning. Steve is seated in the same pod as you catching up on his charting. It's the kind of comfortable, calm quiet that is exceedingly rare in a hospital, and one that no one would ever dare jinx by even mentioning it.

As you take the opportunity to go through the emails you've missed on your days off, Gator stalks through the ambulance bay doors.

"Christ, ya could play a little music or something. It's so qu --"

"SHUT UP." You and Steve bark in unison, eyes wild in shock that he was about to break the one rule of healthcare -- you don't. Say. Quiet.

"Fuck me, sorry, ladies."

"Whaddya want, Gator? I'm busy."

He leans over the desk and sees you hurriedly clicking out of your Amazon shopping cart and onto your work emails. He shoots you a sneaky grin and shrugs.

"Just checking in. Slow night for us, too. Wanted to make sure a certain Cryptkeeper wasn't givin' ya anymore trouble?"

A brief flash of anger flares at even mentioning Dr. Crisp, but you shake your head.

"Nah, he hasn't said much. Think he's mad, someone filled his gas tank with sugar a few days ago."

You quirk a brow at him and he snorts, trying to hold back a laugh.

"No kiddin'."

"Oh, yah, you didn't know nothin' about that, huh?"

"Me? Nah. But maybe it'll help him be a little sweeter when he's workin' with ya."

Gator winks and you chuckle, shaking your head and returning to your computer screen.

"I thought it was pretty funny." Steve mutters under his breath.

You and Gator both turn to look at him, surprised that he was engaging in a conversation between the two of you. Steve's eyes flick between you both a few times before he shrugs and continues charting.

"He had it coming."

"See, boss? Paddington gets it."

"It's Harrington."

"Aww, shit." You murmur, one particularly festive email subject catching your eye.

🎄🎁 UNIT EVENT COUNCIL TASK LIST☃️🎅

You open it, and it's just as bad as you suspect. It's your turn to help host and decorate for the upcoming staff Christmas party.

"What's up?" Steve asks, concern in his sweet, puppy-dog eyes. Gator says nothing, but there's a similar look in his eyes, too.

"Aah, I completely forgot. I'm on the goddamn holly jolly committee this year."

"You??" Gator scoffs. You shoot him a glare and bury your face in your hands.

"What's wrong with that?" Steve asks innocently, eyebrows drawn together in a puzzled expression.

"Boss lady doesn't do holidays. Especially not the holly jolly kind."

"What??"

"No, I dont. And now I gotta go to the stupid craft place in my free time and get a buncha decorations and shit. And that means I have to go to the damn party. Fuck my life..."

"Oh, well I'm - I'm like obsessed with Christmas. I've got half an attic-full of decorations."

Your ears perk up at that, and a slow, devious grin splits your face.

"Oh...do ya now?"

"Ooh. Bad call, Burlington."

"It's Harrington. And why's that a bad call?"

"So, yah, Steve -- can I come over and raid your attic?"

🎄

Steve agrees to come and pick you up on your next shared day off so you can go through the decorations in his attic. You offered to take the bus over instead, but he insisted that it was no problem and you love riding in the BMW, so it wasn't hard to convince you.

You couldn't deny that you had a few butterflies flapping around in your stomach. This was, on the surface, a strictly work-related issue. You needed decorations for the Christmas party, Steve was willing to share from his collection. You two have been on a few post-shift coffees, and when you work together the conversation flows easily, laughs are frequent, and a little harmless flirting is common.

It just really hasn't escalated much further than that, despite the fact that you wanted it to (and you suspected and hoped he did too). Now you were going to his home, and would be there for a few hours at least if his collection is as massive as he says.

So, you decide, it's worth wearing the fancy underwear. You put a little light makeup on and twist your hair into a comfortable-but-cute messy bun and throw on a baggy sweater with tights.

As you're deciding on what shoes to wear, there's a knock at the door. You'd left it unlocked because you knew Steve would be here any minute.

"C'mon in!" You call from your bedroom.

You hear the door open and shut, then Steve's voice.

"You just leave the door unlocked?"

"Only for my friends! I'll be out in just a sec, just grabbing shoes!"

"You should really keep it locked! Y'know, since --"

You lean your head out the bedroom door, eyebrow cocked and mouth in a hard line. Your face is encouraging him to choose his next words wisely.

"Well, just since you're alone. No cause you're a girl or anything."

"Woman, Steve. And thanks for the concern, but I can handle myself."

You go back to shuffling through your closet and Steve huffs a laugh through his nose, starting to meander around your living room.

He smiles at the pictures on the wall; you with your girlfriends, your college graduation, and a much younger you hugging a big, fluffy German Shepherd. He flips through your box of vinyls, nodding at some selections and wrinkling his nose at others. He decides that he'll have to bring his collection over some time to swap some tunes.

When he takes a step back, his shoulder bangs into something hard and metal. He winces and glances up and down at the random silver bar extending from the floor to the ceiling. Why would you have one bare support beam in this random open --

Oh my god.

It's a dance pole. You have a dance pole.

So, as natural as the tide, Steve now pictures you dancing on it, grinding your hips and shaking your ass, spreading your legs. Most enticingly he pictures that it's a show just for him; that you could dance for anyone, and you choose him because you want him to see you. All of you.

You step into the living room with your bag and shoes, ready to go.

"Alrighty, let's hit it --"

Steve spins around, face completely awash in pink and his stance sporting an odd bend at the hip. His eyebrows shoot high up on his forehead and his smile is too forced, false. Nervous.

"Woah...ya alright, Harrington?"

He nods too enthusiastically, and then you realize he's taking tiny steps away from your pole. A sneaky grin spreads across your face, and he just shakes his head, though you're not sure what for.

"Found my pole, hm?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah. This one? Yeah, that's cool. I've heard it's gre-great exercise." His voice cracks, throat bobbing anxiously. It's absolutely darling.

"Oh, sure. You can really work up a sweat with this thing. Play your cards right, and I'll show ya sometime."

You wink and walk through the door, trying to stifle the laughter that begs to be set free at Steve's absolutely wrecked expression. While your back is to him, he adjusts his half-hard cock in his jeans before following you out.

☃️

"Steven."

"Yeah?"

"Why -- why do you have so many Christmas decorations?"

You stand at the entrance to Steve's living room where he's laid out all of the decorations from the attic in advance, and it looks like a Hallmark movie bomb went off. There are clusters of tinsel and garland in at least four different colors, boxes of inflatables, six giant wreaths, two Styrofoam snowmen, containers of baubles, ornaments, and miscellaneous decor, window stickers, and miles of string lights. It's more Christmas decorations than you've ever had in your entire life combined, right here in this room.

Steve looks over his holiday treasures proudly, hands on his hips.

"Christmas is fun. Colorful, joyful. Get to give things to people you love, spoil them a little. I dunno -- it's just nice."

You step carefully over glass trinkets and vintage plastic blow molds of Frosty and Rudolph. Something red, white, and fuzzy catches your eye on the couch. You pull it out and hold it up in front of you and catch Steve clearing his throat, shifting his weight nervously.

"Is this a Santa costume?"

"Mm-hm."

"Do you...dress as Santa?"

"Well, not like routinely, no. I used to for the kids at the hospital back home sometimes, and I just kept it. You never know..."

You bring it down from its accusatory angle and hold it closer to your chest, realizing just how big of a heart the man in front of you has.

"You're such a good guy, Steve. I swear."

"Why don't you 'do' Christmas? Is it a religious thing?"

"Nah. We just weren't a big holiday household. I was mostly raised by my dad, and...yeah, we usually just let days slip on by without making too much of a fuss. Was easier that way. Then I guess I grew up and never really made any new traditions." You shrug and fold the Santa costume neatly, placing it back into the box you found it in.

"Oh."

You shake your head and wag your finger at him admonishingly.

"Nooo, no pity party, Steve. I'm a big girl, I'm perfectly fine even without a single festive bone in my body. Now, I think this garland would be great, can we use that? Maybe these little trees, too? For the tabletops."

He nods and grabs an empty box, adding the items you were choosing to use for the party. He throws in a couple of hanging decorations, snowflakes and reindeer, and a few of the smaller wreaths.

"I have plates and stuff, too. Serving sets."

You giggle. "Of course you do. That would be awesome. What is this stuff?" You hold up a green, twiggy plant with small, white nodules, tied together with a satin red ribbon.

Steve smiles wide and gently takes it from your fingers, holding it over both of your heads.

"Mistletoe."

The tiniest, "oh" sneaks past your lips, and your eyes dance over each other's faces, looking for signals. Steve takes a step closer and you reach out to take his other hand, inviting him nearer.

He lets go to brush a tendril of hair behind your ear, then lets his fingers softly linger on the nape of your neck.

"Can I?"

You nod, and he leans in, brushing his lips over yours as soft as a whisper at first. Then he's kissing your top lip; you feel the hint of a flick of his tongue like he's testing how far you want this to go. It's intense in its sweetness, so gentle and slow that every minute twitch and opening of your mouths is tantalizingly felt.

You bring your own hands up his strong, lean chest, up the column of his throat and to his face, finally tangling in his thick head of beautiful dark hair. A small groan tickles against your mouth, and you can feel yourself clench in response, pressing your thighs together for relief.

You open your eyes for a moment to marvel in the softness of his face as he kisses you, and you notice that he's still holding the damn mistletoe above you. You chuckle against his lips and grab his wrist, bringing it down to your waist. The mistletoe tumbles to the floor, and Steve grips your hips with both hands.

"I've wanted -- to do this -- for a week." He blurts out between deep, sensuous kisses.

"You've only known me a week."

"Yeah, exactly."

You giggle and wrap your arms around his neck, pulling your bodies tightly together and burying your face in his shoulder. He gently kisses the spot behind your ear that makes you shudder, and you pull back just enough to see his pretty, glittering eyes.

"I really like you, Steve."

"I really like you, too."

🎁

❄️ 2 Weeks Later ❄️

Twas the shift before the Christmas party, and things between you and Steve have escalated exponentially. You no longer bother hiding your flirty banter, and even steal kisses and touches whenever you're around each other on the unit.

Tonight you both happened to be working together again (that also seemed to happen a lot more lately), and the wee hours before shift change were dragging on. You lean back in your swivel chair, sipping on a coffee and willing your eyes to stay open, when a long pair of familiar arms wind around you. Steve's scent fills your nostrils, warm and inviting, and you turn your head slightly to give him a chaste kiss on the lips.

"Hiya. How's it going?"

"Fine. Just did the glucometers, wiped down the COWs."

"Aw, thanks hon. Ya don't gotta do all that stuff, I usually just knock it out around 5 or 6."

He shrugs and kisses your temple.

"I like helping."

You pinch his cheek, and in an overly saccharine voice say, "Aren't you just the bestest, sweetest boy?"

He swallows and rubs the back of his neck.

"Ooh, maybe not that kind of talk right out here."

"Oh?" You lean closer to the shell of his ear. "Does that do it for ya? Me telling ya how fucking good you are for me?"

He stands straight and glances down both ends of the desolate hallway.

"Hang on." He scurries down the corridor for a moment, and when he comes back it's with Madgie in tow, of all people.

"Thanks, Madgie. Appreciate you. Ready boss? I swear one of these days I'll remember the way to radiology. Just...isn't today. Madgie said she can watch the front."

Steve raises his eyebrows at you subtly and you play right along, nodding and shuffling papers around your desk.

"Yah, we're gonna have to get ya a map, Harrington. Be right back, thanks Madgie."

Madgie grumbles in response, going back to reading her romance novel, and the second you and Steve round the corner on the way to radiology he pulls you into a closet.

It was one that you all deemed the "haunted closet", because the light was busted and it was at the end of a remote, dark hallway. It was filled with old signs and busted chairs, mostly junk the hospital administrators were too cheap to throw away. He presses you up against the door, lifting your legs around his hips with ease.

"You're such a fucking tease, you know when you say stuff like that it makes me hard."

"I do know, that's why I said it."

"But I'm so good to you, aren't I? Why're you being so mean?"

"M'sorry. Maybe you should punish me."

It's pitch black in this closet, but if you could look at Steve's eyes right now you would see the lovely, velvety, greenish-brown of his eyes would be completely engulfed in black with the desire coursing through his veins.

"Yeah? You want that?"

He delivers a light smack to the side of your ass cheek, making you squirm.

"I think I do. It's the only way I'll learn, Steve."

A low grumble looses from his chest and he drops your legs back to the floor, spinning you to face the door. He plants your hands on the wood and runs his hand down your back until he reaches the curve of your ass.

He spanks you again, slightly harder than the first.

"Gonna be nice?"

"Mmm...nope."

"Brat."

He spanks your other cheek, this time with a pretty significant sting to it. He grips the globe of your ass, moving his hand to feel it jiggle beneath his palm.

"How about now?"

"I'm -- I'm feeling a little friendlier, maybe. Maybe one more, just to be safe."

He rears back and gives you one final slap on the opposite side, then runs his finger down the crack of your ass over your scrub pants. He cups your mound in his big, nimble hands, feeling how much heat is coming off of you even through the fabric.

"Nice list? Or naughty list?"

You giggle through your panting breaths and wiggle your ass enticingly.

"I'm feeling really nice, now."

"Well, good. You know what nice girls get?"

"Hm?"

He steps away from your side and tugs your pants and underwear halfway down your hips. Grabbing your tender ass cheeks and spreading you open, he dips his tongue straight into your slit, tasting your juices and moaning into your pussy.

"Oh, shit, Steve! Is that your mouth?"

"Mm-hm." He murmurs, tongue too busy fucking into your tight hole to form a real response.

You whimper and moan against the door, trying not to make too much of a ruckus as Steve feasts on you. He begins to lightly rub two fingers over your clit in varying shapes and lines until he feels you jolt and tense around his tongue. He keeps that exact movement up until he feels you grow wetter, spilling yourself into his waiting mouth with his name on your breath.

He straightens after he's lapped up all of your cum, wiping his lips and chin on the inside of his scrub top and sliding your pants back around your waist, ending it with a final loving tap against your ass.

You feel for his chest and turn his back to the door, working the tie on his scrub pants to free his straining cock. His hands try to stop yours.

"Hey, you don't have to. It's fine."

"Pssh. What are ya talking about?"

"I didn't do that just to get something back. I just wanted to taste you."

His words send a trembling aftershock through your groin, but you send it back and keep undressing him.

"Well, what if I want the same? Ya gonna let me have a taste of you, Steve?"

He stops trying to stop you at once.

"I mean, if that's what you want."

"Mm. Such a martyr, you are."

You fall to your knees in front of him and shimmy his pants past his hips. You can't see in here, but it's making everything so much more touch-sensitive and it's kind of magical. You grip his base and gently stroke upward, and his head bangs against the door.

"Shh!"

"Shit, s-sorry."

"Must stay quiet, Harrington. Don't want anyone to catch ya with your cock in my mouth, do ya?"

"Well, I mean --"

You quiet him with a few flicks of your tongue against the underside of his head, the taste of salty precum already dribbling down from the slit.

You suck the tip between your lips, giving a couple of teasing bobs, before you relax your throat and go as deeply as you can take him. It's still not his entire length, you can feel that, so you stroke the base of him with your hand in time with your sucks. Normally you might like to tease him a little more, but it's getting closer to shift change and you can't stay in this closet forever.

You hollow your cheeks and let out little moans against, the vibrations making his balls tighten up.

"Gonna cum. Where can I--?"

You start taking him in faster, deeper; his hand goes to the back of your head and you can feel him lightly rutting his hips, so you let him fuck your mouth until he groans and you feel the hot, heady taste of his cum spilling down your throat.

You try and straighten each other up by the lights of your phone screens, giggling like teenagers all the while.

"Excited for the party tonight?"

"Bah, humbug."

"Aah, it's gonna be great. I decided I'm gonna wear the Santa costume."

"You're...not serious?"

"Uh, deadly serious, actually."

"Why on God's green earth would you wear that thing?"

"Because it's Christmas? And if I dress as Santa I can ask you to sit on my lap, and no one will think twice about it."

He smiles, gives you a peck on the lips, and opens the closet door. You both step out into the hallway, and a very familiar smell wafts into your nose. An artificial sweetness, pungent and --

"Well, well, well." Gator croons, one foot braced against the hallways wall as he puffs on his vape.

Your eyes go wide with horror, though you're not sure why. It's not like you're cheating or being unfaithful. Still, it was yet another blending of your two worlds, making this thing even messier than it already was.

You straighten your scrub top and puff out your chest, breezing by Gator like you had somewhere to be (which was literally anywhere else).

"Ya can't vape in the hospital, Gator. I've told ya that a hundred times."

"There's lotsa things ya can't do in a hospital, boss. I think you and Kensington just did a few of em in the haunted closet."

You turn on your heel abruptly and both Gator and Steve stop dead in their tracks, Steve mildly annoyed and Gator thoroughly amused.

"Gator, can it. What Steve and I do is none of your business."

He holds his hands up defensively, and you realize that he's not even in uniform, just his layperson clothes; a tight-fitting, well-worn AC/DC t-shirt half-tucked into dark wash jeans with his camo jacket and backwards baseball cap.

"Are you even working right now?"

"Nah."

"Get the fuck outta here, Gator." You rub your temple exasperatedly and return to the front desk to relieve Madgie.

"Alright, I'm going, I'm going. Was just gonna tell ya I'll be at the party tonight."

"Wow, I'm -- that's really titillating stuff Gator."

He snorts through his nose, mimicking the word, "titillating" under his breath as he swaggers back to the entrance of the hospital.

"See ya tonight, boss lady. You too, Remington."

Steve doesn't bother correcting him.

🎅

You settle on a snug-fitting crushed red velvet top with a plunging neckline and deep emerald green plaid pants. It's about all you have in the way of "gay apparel".

A knock at the door pulls you from the kitchen as you gather last minute potluck items; cookies, egg nog, peppermint bark, and chips and salsa. You twist the deadbolt and swing the door open, then try to contain your scream.

Steve is dripping in crimson and white fur, a thick leather belt in the middle cinched at his narrow waist and of course, the hat.

"No beard, hm?"

"Nah, I'm going for like the fun, youthful Santa look, y'know?"

"Mm. Well, I support your life choices, Steve. C'mon, help me grab all this food."

You both take plastic totes with your food items and disposable plates and napkins and load them into Steve's BMW. Once everything is in and Steve shuts the trunk, he brings something from behind his back and dangles it overhead. You recognize it now as mistletoe. He grins at you and you lean up on your tip-toes to give him a long, slow, sweet kiss.

"You are looking so damn good, Mrs. Clause. Christmas classy."

You chuckle, reaching into your back pocket.

"Well, I did get one thing to help get into the holiday spirit..." You shove the red, glittery Santa hat you found at the grocery store over your hair and grin up at him cheesily.

You could almost swear you see a literal twinkle in his eye.

❄️

An hour or so into the party you've finished your White Elephant gift exchange and listened to enough Christmas music that you crave the solitude of sitting in a silent, padded room for a few hours. If you have to hear about this man's grandma getting run over by a reindeer one more time, you might commit arson.

Now you're just mingling and sipping at Madgie's "Jingle Juice", which is just fruit punch with rum and vodka and orange slices. Steve nudges you with his hip as you both lean against one of the back walls. His eyes are glassy and his face soft from the slight buzz, and you imagine yours is the same.

"Hey, Santa Baby."

"Hey, ho ho ho."

You feign a look of offense and he giggles, cheeks pink as he laces his fingers with yours.

"I'm -- I'm so sorry. Gator said it was funny."

You stare daggers at Gator from across the conference room and he's already watching, shoulders shaking with anticipatory laughter. You give him the finger, and he shoots it right back.

"So, you two are friends now? Cause that sounds like a special kind of hell, I can't lie."

"What? I'm a friendly guy."

"Mm-hm. Friendly's what ya call it?"

You wink at him and he leans in to whisper directly in your ear.

"I can show you exactly how friendly I can be, if you like."

You purse your lips to contain your excitement, but nod eagerly anyway. He pulls you by your connected hands towards the doctor's office hallway.

"Where are you taking me, Santa Steve?"

"Heard Crisp got a big, sturdy, solid oak desk last week. I'd love to see something that fancy, y'know?"

He stops on a dime and pins you suddenly against the wall of the hallway, tilting your chin up to meet his gaze.

"Oh, and I'd really love to fuck you on it."

You gasp a shuddered breath and mash his face onto yours, kissing him sloppily and tangling his hair into knots. Both of your teeth occasionally graze with smallest click as you lick and fuck your tongues into each other's mouths. You start walking backwards towards Crisp's office, tugging Steve by the fur collar.

You pull out the master hospital key you keep on you all the time and swing the door to Crisp's ugly, bare office. Leadership does have its benefits, after all.

Steve was right -- there's a sleek new desk, rich, unscathed, and a deep brown color with whorling patterns and a shiny clear coat over the whole thing. It's basically a Cadillac.

You slip your feet out of your boots and kick them across the room, then tug your slacks down and toss them off in the same direction. Steve grips his length through the cheap material of his Santa suit and slowly strokes himself, eyes burning holes into your skin.

"Know what I got ya this year, Steve?"

"What's that?"

You teasingly pinch the hem of your sweater and lift it overhead, leaving you in nothing but your stupid Santa hat and your brand new matching lacy red bra and panties. He drinks you in, tracing your curves and leering at the fabric that leaves very little to the imagination.

His hands are at your waist in moments, picking you up and setting your bare ass down on the oak. You squeal at the feel of the frigid surface of the desk under your flushed skin. Steve stands between your parted legs, arms caging you in and hands planted firmly on the desk. He licks and nips at the softest parts of your neck, feeling your pulse hammering beneath his lips.

He closes the distance even further, rubbing his rigid cock over your barely clothed pussy. The friction is electric, scratching an itch burning within both of you, but just by a fraction.

"God, you're so big."

"You gonna take it anyway?"

"Mm-hm, yah. Give it to me, please."

One of his hands slips between your legs and tugs the pitiful scrap of fabric you call panties to the side. He runs a finger delicately between your lips, spreading your slickness all over it, then curls it inside of you and begins to slowly pump in and out. He adds a second shortly after and scissors them, sending a delightful buzzing through your skull.

"Condom?"

"Birth control."

"Fuck, so...can I--"

"Cum inside me?"

Steve nods enthusiastically, hopefully. You stroke his cheek, smiling warmly.

"Merry Christmas, Steve Harrington."

Both of you giggle, mouths touching, as Steve frees himself from the confines of his Santa pants. Seeing it in the light this time, you get an idea of the absolute monster you're working with.

It's long, tilting upward toward his belly button with a slight lean to the right. A delicious blue vein squiggles along the underside, giving you the urge to feel it on your tongue again. You reach between your legs and pump him a few times, then he angles his hips and begins to push inside of you.

With a few tender thrusts you take him all, dizzied from the sheer fullness. He starts a slow roll of his hips as you meet him with yours, feeling every inch of him as he drags his cock through your pussy.

You're so blissed out that you don't hear the office door open, but Steve does. He looks up over your shoulder and watches as Gator slinks in, eyeing the two of you with what seems to be only mild interest. His eyes latch onto Steve's, and he settles into a chair in the corner, legs spread wide.

Steve gives you a pointed thrust, making you cry out and clutch at his shoulders, and he gives Gator a cocky smirk. Gator returns the gesture and palms his hardening dick over his pants.

You whine when Steve pulls out of you, but feel a thrill go through your spine when he gruffly flips you over, steadying yourself on the table with your palms and jutting your ass out for him to take. He glides back in and gives you no time to adjust to this new angle, fucking you at a feverish pace and gathering your hair into a bunch that he can fist. He doesn't pull hard enough to hurt, just enough to arch your back a little and make you look straight ahead.

Straight at Gator.

You feel like you would have screamed or yelped if you weren't in your fucked-out haze, or maybe it was just because it was...Gator. You knew Gator, you maybe even liked having him around despite his arrogance and bad jokes. So watching him stroking his cock through his jeans while Steve pounded into you from behind just felt...acceptable?

"G-Gator, wha- are y-?"

Gator just holds a finger up to his lips to shush you, then pops the button on his jeans and shimmies them down just enough for his own thick, hard cock to jump free. Steve and Gator were both incredibly well-endowed, and for a moment you wonder what it might be like to have two beasts like that going at you at once.

Your cunt squeezes around Steve at the thought and he sucks in a breath between his teeth, smacking one of your ass cheeks lightly.

"You like when he watches, hm? So dirty."

Gator spits into his palm and slicks it up his length, rubbing his thumb just under the head like you usually do. Your cheeks go flushed and you only manage a keening sound before you're starting to feel boneless. Your elbows bend, chest pressing against the desk.

Suddenly a rough, calloused, and very familiar hand is tucking under your jaw and pulling you back upright. Gator has crawled across the other side of the oak desk, kneeling on it in front of you and continuing to jerk himself off.

You instinctively open your mouth, inviting him to fuck your throat if he so desired. Instead, he leans forward and braces himself on one arm and kisses you. His tongue laves against yours and he sucks your lower lip onto his mouth before gently nipping at it with this straight, sharp teeth.

Your eyes flutter at the duality of how hard Steve is fucking you versus how soft Gator is kissing you. Steve grips the back of one of your thighs and hikes your knee up onto the desk, splitting you open wide so he can dig into you even deeper. You moan into Gator's mouth and he swallows it all, fucking into his fist harder.

"In- my- mouth?" You manage to stutter out between backshots.

Gator straightens up on his knees, his cock perfectly angled at your face. You open your mouth wide again, sticking out your tongue, and he taps his cock against it, brushing the glistening tip over your lips and letting you lap at the precum beading at the tip.

Steve watches everything, enraptured by the sight of you with Gator's cock teasing your mouth. He brings a hand forward to stroke your clit as he fucks you mercilessly; he is about to bust, but wants you to milk it from him with your own orgasm.

"Gonna cum on his dick, boss? Show him how tight your sweet little pussy can squeeze him?"

The obscene slapping sounds of Steve ramming you from behind are growing wetter. The coil winding tighter and tighter in your belly snaps, and you feel the rush of chemicals flood your brain, blinding you.

"God, yes. That's it, fuck." Steve's rhythm finally falters as he fills you with his cum, his eyes trailing up to meet Gator's.

Gator, who, surprisingly enough, was also watching him. He glances down at you, fucked out on the desk but still upright on your arms, and begins to fist his cock even more desperately. You open your mouth again, a silent invitation, and he spills hot ropes of cum across your tongue.

Before you can swallow, he sticks two fingers in your mouth and gently holds your jaw open. Your saliva and his cum pool together, dribbling past your lips and splattering onto the beautiful, stately desk. Gator gives you that trademark shit-eating smirk.

"Let Crisp clean it up."

You shuffle on the floor, pushing yourself up into a sitting position to lean your back against the wall, letting your head flop backwards. “It hurts to think. I feel like my brain has been crushed.” You say, more to test how your words came out.

He huffs out a breathless laugh. “That’s how I felt when you were explaining that movie to me.” He pauses. “I still don’t get it.”

You shake your head, rubbing your fingers against your temples. “It wasn’t that hard to understand. I think I was pretty clear with my words.” You groan.

“I’ve got whatever drugs they gave me in my system, have some sympathy.” He murmurs, shuffling to lean against the toilet.

With everything lapping over each other, what happened with you and Steve with the Russians was pushed to the back of your mind, and you hadn’t put much thought into it at all. The buzz in your body had you feeling more alive then ever, and you were grasping onto that.

You hum. “Okay. Ask me questions then. I’ll do the thinking.”

“Like what?” He asks.

“I said you ask me the questions, not you ask me a question.” You grin, brushing your hands over your knees.

Without needing to look at him, you can tell he’s rolling his eyes, and the thought alone makes you laugh.

“Okay. Uh. Would you rather have hands for feet or feet for hands?” He asks with a chuckle, sliding his hand through his tangled hair.

An amused laugh leaves your lips, and you almost want to question him, but that would defeat the purpose. “Wouldn’t the correct answer be hands for feet? That just makes more sense.”

“You tell me.” He mumbles.

“Well, if you had feet for hands, you wouldn’t be able to function like a human being. You wouldn’t be able to feed yourself or hold a pen.” You say, blinking at the wall of the stall in front of you.

“How would you walk with hands for feet?” He asks, pausing for a moment. “Walking on your feet is easier.”

“I mean, you could crawl?” You say, but you don’t sound sure yourself.

“That’s not normal though.” He laughs.

You drag your hand down your face. “Nothing about your question was normal.”

He goes quiet for a moment, tapping his hands against his thighs. “You’re not wrong. What if the floor was hot though?”

“I guess you’d just have to wear gloves, or just not move at all, that’s easier.” You trail off. “Ask me something else.”

“When was the last time you lied to someone?” He asks.

You laugh, exhaling. “Like, yesterday.”

He sits up straight, snorting. “What, why?”

“A customer asked me if we had any millionaire shortbreads left, but it was the last one left, so I told him no. He walked away disappointed and had no idea that I ate it after we closed for the day.” You grin, the laughs flowing from your mouth.

“Oh my God. That’s cruel.” He laughs.

“What? It looked good.” You breathed.

“I can’t blame you, really. I do that all the time.” He smiles, tilting his head back against the checkered wall, letting his eyes flutter shut.

The room is filled with your laughter for a while, mostly because once he started laughing, it set you off too. It dies down after a few moments, and you sigh, looking up at the ceiling as you think.

“Okay. My turn to ask you a question.” You say, and you can hear Steve shifting in the other stall.

“As long as you’re not going to make me think too much into it.” He groans.

You hum, going silent for a moment. There are so many questions that you’ve been trying to push yourself to ask Steve, but you never had the courage to ask. With the high you were still feeling, it felt like the only chance to blurt something out.

“Have you ever been in love?” You ask breathlessly.

He sighs loudly, and you almost want to take it back, assuming that you hit a rough spot.

“Nancy Wheeler.” He says, and he almost sounds defeated.

“God. Wasn’t expecting that one.” You pause, looking down at your hands, a slight bruise appearing. “Rough one, hm?”

“Yeah, pretty rough.” He murmurs.

“Do you still love her?” You ask.

He’s quick to answer. “No.”

You raise your eyebrows. “Shocker. You sounded a little unimpressed. Why not?” You ask.

“I spent a while thinking over it, y’know. I was so blinded by her, that I didn’t realise I had everything right in front of me.” He laughs, shaking his head.

“What are you saying?” You ask.

“I mean, this girl is just something.” He says breathlessly. “She’s not what I expected, but I think that’s what I like the most. When I first saw her, she was nothing like what I thought she’d be. So, when we started talking to each other, I was shocked. She’s everything that I never knew I needed.” He admits.

You go silent and listen to him ramble on, pinching the bridge of your nose as you try puzzle together what he’s saying.

“She’s nothing like me or my friends, in fact she’s even better. I like that about her. She’s got all these goals for life, and she’s sweet, and she has this sarcastic attitude to herself, but I love it.” He grins. “I didn’t think I’d get so close to her. She seems like the type of person to hate me, and I wouldn’t even question her about that. I mean, we just escaped Russians together. Couldn’t be more insane than that.”

He trails off, staring down at the floor. You scoot your knees up against your chest, resting your chin on your knee, letting out a shaky exhale. After the silence had gone on for too long, he knocks on the stall wall, calling your name.

“Hey, you still with me? Don’t tell me you’ve passed out.” He groans.

You sigh. “I’m more awake than ever, don’t worry.”

The next thing you see is Steve’s scuffed trainers coming under the stall, and he slips into yours, sitting opposite to you with that stupid grin of his. You laugh and shake your head, flopping your head to the side, looking at him after what has felt like hours. It’s been a while since you’ve looked at him and not have your vision blur on you, he looks more himself than ever.

“The girl sounds nice.” You whisper.

“She’s definitely sweet.” He grins.

You hum, slowly blinking at him. “So, escaping Russians together, hm? I’m jealous, what a lucky girl she is.”

He breathes out slowly, slipping his hand through his hair. “Think you should be saying that I’m the lucky one.” He pauses, leaning in closer to you, closing up the space between you. “What do you think of this guy then?”

A warm smile twitches at the corner of your mouth. “Well, he’s an idiot for starters.” You laugh, and he just nods along, not disagreeing with you. “He talks a lot and probably has no idea what he’s saying half of the time. His lips move before his brain does, but he’s really funny, and I think that he can be really sweet.” You pause. “Sometimes.”

“He sounds like a great guy.” He nods.

You gently swat his arm, though there’s no anger in your tone or your gestures. “Don’t let this boost your ego. I think there’s one thing about him though that he needs to work on.” You add.

Steve raises his eyebrows, leaning closer as he listens in. “What’s that?”

“He needs to shoot his shot. Think he spends too much time pissing about.” You admit, letting your eyes flicker from his eyes down to his lips, still split and bloody.

“Maybe that’ll change.” He whispers.

“Then he should do that, starting now.” You whisper.

His hand comes to rest on the side of your face, and his thumb brushes over your cheek. He wastes no time leaning in, pressing his lips to yours in a desperate kiss, like he’s been physically holding back for months. Even through the desperation, he’s still gentle, keeping himself aware of your sounds and your movements.

Your hands slide into his hair, gripping strands between your fingers, pulling a groan from his throat. He presses himself against you, giving you no personal space. You’re pressed to the wall, panting against his mouth. For the first time you’re kissing Steve, it’s not in the best setting. The taste of his lips is metallic, and if this was anyone else, you’d be pulling away, but you couldn’t help but lean in more.

“You’re beautiful.” He whispers against your mouth.

You roll your eyes. “How romantic.”

He slowly pulls back, grinning. “Definitely not the most romantic place I’ll be kissing you, but at least we can check this one off.”

“Why, where else are you planning?” You ask with a laugh.

“Enzo’s. Once we are out of here, anyway.” He brushes his thumb over your bruised lip, a slight hint of concern washing over him.

“Trying to impress me already?” You ask, raising your eyebrows.

He grins. “Of course.”

“It’s definitely working.” You whisper, sliding your hands through his hair, your mood completely softening up.

“That’s my plan.” He mumbles, burying his head into your shoulder, letting the tension in his body relax.

It may not have been the best place to open up, especially when you’re sat on a bathroom floor together, only just aware of what you’re saying, but you didn’t know if or when this could happen again. Not long after, Dustin and Erica come barging through the door, offering you and Steve a concerned look as they glance at each other. They’re completely clueless to the conversation you had before, and they just roll their eyes.

You sip some coffee from a paper cup (it's not quite as sweet as you like but there were only 3 packets of sugar in the break room drawer) and look over the clipboard with your crew's assignments for the night.

The emergency department at the Walter Mondale Care Center was only 20 beds and not terribly busy most nights. You had the occasional bar fights needing stitched up on the weekends, car accidents from icy roads, people needing a dose of Narcan, typical ED fare, so you usually only had 5 or so nurses under your charge on any given shift.

Tonight, however, you noticed a name penciled next to yours, which was new.

Steve H. -- training shift 1

Guess you've got a newbie tagging along tonight. You breathe a little sigh into your coffee cup, not necessarily abhorred by the idea of having a trainee; it just meant you'd really need to perk up since you'd probably be talking more than you're used to, and you didn't want to scare them away before they even got started.

Bodies start shuffling in, bags being tossed into lockers and the Keurig spurting to life as your crew gathers for pre-shift huddle. You give everyone a small "hello" as they sit down and start going over their assignments for the night. It was a solid group tonight, reliable nurses that you could trust to get their shit done, so it would make training the new guy easier for you.

Your eyes flick over the new updates that hospital management wanted you to share, and just as the clock ticked over to 18:45, huddle start time, the break room door swung open violently and a man came stumbling in.

He had long, dark hair, tousled in a way that looked effortless but stayed perfectly in place as he bounded in, so it was obviously a meticulously crafted masterpiece. He's got big, beautiful, hazel eyes, full of panic thinking he was late, lips parted as he tried to catch his breath.

"I'm so sorry, I'm sorry. I couldn't find the fuc-- the darn break room." He stood straighter, adjusting his badge on the right corner of his scrub top where you saw the flash of his name - Steve.

"Well, hey newbie. No worries, we usually give ya about 5 minutes grace, traffic and whatnot. Usually you'll come in and grab your assignment, but you're with me tonight so why don't ya just take a seat and we'll get started?"

His eyes glitter and a wide smile splits his face, ever so slightly tilted higher to one side than the other. He was...okay, he was really, really cute.

He clutched the strap of his messenger bag and awkwardly scooched past some of the other staff to sit at the very back and observe. You couldn't help but notice how his blue Figs hugged his very tight ass.

18:48 PM

You shook the thoughts of Steve's ass out of your brain (at least for the moment) and went into leader-mode, giving your spiel, discussing the plan for the night, going over assignments, and stopping a potential meltdown one of the older nurses was about to have because her assignment was near the doors, and she didn't like sitting near the doors since they were loud and let in the chilly night air.

"Madgie, just sit at the central station, you can pull up your vitals on the main computer."

"Well, someone's gonna have to show me how."

"That's fine, we gotta train the new guy on it anyhow. You can watch. Speaking of which, everyone say hi to Steve. He's coming to us all the way from Indiana, so let's give him a nice welcome, 'kay? No biting."

You shoot him a quick wink and he smirks, giving the room a small, demure wave.

"Morning. Well, evening, I guess? I didn't really do nights before. That'll take some getting used to.

"No one really cares, kid." One of the gruff male nurses, Odie, grumbles from the corner. His massive arms are crossed, highlighting the tattoos scrawled all over almost every inch of visible skin. His thick, black mustache wriggles as he abuses the wad of gum between his teeth, chomping far harder than necessary. He's been trying to quit smoking this week, and the Nicorette just isn't cutting it, but you were proud of him regardless.

Odie was a damn good nurse, rough around the edges, but had a way with kids that was astonishing. One would think he would scare them off, but it was just the opposite. He'd walk in, blow up a glove like a balloon and throw a little happy face on there, and they were putty in his hands.

Steve, who didn't know yet that Odie was actually a huge teddy bear, looked horrified.

"He doesn't mean that, Steve. Odie just needs to chug that coffee and maybe go ahead and start a second one, hm?"

He grumbles something else that may contain a "Sorry" and Steve's shoulders relax a fraction.

"Okay gang. Shift change in 5. Get out there, wash those hands, get to your stations. And Claudia, please get your BLS done tonight. I don't want you to get locked out of the system, hon."

Claudia, a pretty, young, blonde nurse who started about 7 months ago, nods sheepishly.

"Got it, boss. Sorry, slips my mind every time."

"I'll try to circle back around 5 to remind ya, okay?"

"Thanks. Have a good shift, Steve." She wiggles her fingers at Steve in the corner and he nods eagerly, excited just to be acknowledged. It was honestly refreshing, you missed sometimes how much you used to bubble over about your job. Unfortunately it can wear you down fast, but maybe Steve some of Steve's positivity will rub off on you.

"Alrighty, Harrington. Got any questions to start? Ya get a tour of the place yet?"

He jerks to his feet, that golden retriever energy still very much alive.

"Yeah, tour's done, it's a nice place. I was in pediatrics for a little bit back home before I decided to haul ass to a new state and try something else. It was a lot bigger, but I like this. Easier to navigate for sure.

"What so you -- ya just packed up and moved to a completely different state? Just...because?"

You were jealous. You've been stuck in Stark County your entire life, dreaming of one day getting the hell out but never really seeing it as a possibility. Steve shrugs.

"My friends all split up and went their different ways after colleges and careers happened. I didn't really feel like being the only one stuck in Hawkins, so, yeah. Just took a leap."

The smile he gives you is warm, but there's a sadness behind his eyes. No one really prepares you for the very real possibility that when you grow up your friends just leave -- go out and live their own lives, make new friendships, and there really wasn't a lot you could do about it. Maybe you'd see each other around the holidays, maybe you'd send each other a funny text or an Instagram Reel that reminds you of them, but eventually even that becomes too much effort and they just turn into bittersweet, cherished memories. Childhood was short; adulthood was cruel.

And wow, you're sure a ray of fucking sunshine, aren't you? You shake off your melancholic musings and plant a firm hand on his shoulder, giving him a broad, welcoming smile.

"Well...I'm glad you leapt into our little pond, Steve. Now c'mon, get your stuff in a locker and let's go get started."

⚕️

"So you've got three training shifts before we boot ya out onto the floor, but anytime ya need anything ya can always reach out to whoever is in charge or -- well, anyone really. We're a pretty friendly bunch." You think for a moment, and add, "Maybe not Madgie. Don't -- don't ask Madgie for anything. But everyone else is perfectly pleasant."

Steve chuckles and nods, already having faced Madgie's miserly wrath when she caught him nibbling on one of the packets of graham crackers she kept in "her" drawer at the central nurse's station.

//

"The ones in the nutrition room are always expired, these are my personal crackers from home!"

"Madgie, I'm -- I can't tell you how sorry I am. I swear on my life I'll replace your graham crackers." Steve had told her, putting a hand over his heart and giving her the most sincere, apologetic look. You had had to turn your body away and bite your lip just to keep from bursting into a fit of giggles right there.

As soon as you both turned the corner of the corridor, leaving her grumbling about "all the crumbs he'd left, too," neither of you could hold it in. You both quietly wheezed, trying not to make a huge commotion. You smacked his shoulder and leaned into him breathlessly, mouth open in a silent cackle. He had caught you by the dip in your waist, holding you upright as you both tried to compose yourselves, tears in your eyes from laughing so hard.

//

That was probably close to 45 minutes ago, and the skin on your side was still burning from the feel of his hand gripping you there.

"So, got any questions so far, hon?" The pet name slips out without you realizing it, but you catch yourself. "Sorry, Steve. Please don't sue me for, like, harassment or whatever."

"For hon? My mom calls me hon. You'll have to do a lot worse than hon to get me riled up."

Well. That sounded like a challenge you could really have a lot of fun with...but, you just smile with a slight roll of your eyes, muttering, "Can never be too careful these days."

It's about halfway through your shift, and you can already see that Steve is an incredible nurse. He's just supposed to be sticking with you at the central station tonight, but he's started assisting when a new admit drops in, grabbing vital signs or just a cup of coffee for a family member in the waiting area. He's always courteous, kind, charming, and accommodating, even when people come in burdened by pain or anxiety. He's gentle in a way that's even soothing for you, and you're not even on the receiving end of it.

"I don't even know why they've got you training with me tonight, Harrington. You're a natural. A pro."

He beams at you, scrubbing down a countertop with sanitizing wipes while you QC test the glucometers for the unit.

"I dunno, I'm learning a ton. It's been fun hanging out with you, too. You're a good teacher."

"Oh, yah? What invaluable wisdom have I bestowed upon you tonight, Nurse Harrington?"

He pauses and thinks for a moment.

"You showed me where the bathrooms are. That's pretty important, I think."

You laugh so suddenly that you snort a little, hand darting up to cover your face.

"Goddamnit, I hate that stupid --"

"No! It's amazing, I love making you laugh. That's been the best part of the night."

He glances up at you and you feel heat rushing to multiple parts of your body, most noticeable visibly on your cheeks.

"Mine...mine, too. So thanks for that."

The small pause seems to stretch between you forever until he tosses the spent wipe in the trash along with his purple nitrile gloves. You catch yourself ogling every twitch and curl of his fingers as he tidies up.

"Hey, would you maybe wanna, like, stop for a coffee or something after our shift?"

The offer catches you completely off-guard. It hasn't even been a whole shift, and he's already asking you out for coffee? Or, maybe it was just professional courtesy. Maybe he just wanted to decompress after his first night shift in your ED. Best not to get your hopes too high.

"Oh, um...yeah, sure. There's a great little place a couple blocks from here. Bean There, Done That, I think."

His brow twitches and furrows.

"Bean There...Done That?"

"Yessir. We don't skimp out on the puns in this town."

"Oh, Christ. Is it too late to transfer down to Texas?"

"Oh, yah. You're stuck here with us now, Harrington."

You grin slyly and he laughs, raking his fingers through his gorgeous head of hair.

"I guess there's worse places to be."

His eyes are twinkly, making the harsh florescent bulbs above you seem appealing somehow. You're just about to come back with some more demi-flirty banter when the lights and sirens pull into the ambulance bay.

Both of your heads snap up in that direction, not expecting any kind of incoming trauma or emergency.

"Madgie, you know what this is?"

"How should I know?" She grumbles, smacking on one of her treasured grahams.

You jog outside to meet the paramedics, Steve not far behind. The doors to the back of the ambulance swing open as they unload a stretcher with a young man in his early twenties holding his fist wrapped in a blood-soaked t-shirt.

"Well, what do we got going on here?"

"Hey, Doc. Blew my fingers off with a firecracker."

You pinch the bridge of your nose with your thumb and pointer.

"Alrighty then. Well, I'm not the doctor, but go on in, they'll getcha sorted. Steve, ya wanna go with our friend and get the admit started?"

"Love to. C'mon, dude. So, fireworks, huh?"

He walks alongside the kid, chatting him up completely nonchalantly like two of his charred digits weren't sitting in a plastic baggie full of ice on his lap.

Yeah, he's gonna do just fine here, you thought.

You were pulled from your musings by a strong pair of hands snaking around your middle. You whip around, pushing at the chest of the ambulance driver and Chief of the EMS crew, Gator Tillman. His lip curled up into a wicked little grin, a half-healed bruise under his right eye from some recent scuffle.

"Helloooooo, nurse." He crooned, still trying to hold you against him by the small of your back as you weakly tried to push him away.

"Oh, yah, Gator, that never gets old."

"How's it goin' tonight? Who's the pretty boy ya came out with?"

"Hmm. Jealous? That's my new friend, Steve."

"Jealous? Please. Real men don't go into nursing, no offense."

Your jaw drops, and you shove away a little more earnestly, his hands falling away from your body. You cross your arms over your chest in a huff.

"Lots of offense, Tillman. Like, all of the fucking offense. Layers and layers of it. You tell that to Odie, he might actually strangle ya to death. Besides, what's wrong with a female-dominated career field? I think we kick ass."

He sneers and rolls his eyes, hands shoving into the pockets of his EMS vest jacket.

"Please, don't get all PC on me." He clears his throat and his voice gets a little smaller. "But, uh, don't tell Odie I said that, actually."

You snicker at that, and he gives you a softer smile in return.

"Sorry...didn't mean it bad."

"Well, it came out bad, Gator. Men and women alike can be amazing nurses. You've seen it, so don't even lie. You're just jealous of his hair, I think. Guys got an epic head of hair."

"Jealous? I'm not jealous a'that puss--"

You shoot him a look before he can make yet another sensationally sexist comment in your presence and his jaw clamps tight around the words. He sniffs and squares his broad shoulders, cracking his neck on both sides.

"Not jealous. He should be jealous. Cause I get to come here and do stuff like this..."

He closes the two steps between you both again, fingers slipping brazenly past the waistband of your scrub pants and gripping the flesh of your ass. Your breath catches in your throat as you cling to his shoulders, trying to keep your balance with him looming over you.

"Gator! Someone could see." You hiss.

"Mm-hm. I can tell how much ya like that, too." His fingers slide down the cleft of your ass and press against your core from behind, feeling the wetness soaking through the cotton of your underwear.

A shaky breath escapes your lips. You search around the ambulance bay wildly to check for any prying eyes, and, finding none, you grip the back of his neck and crash your lips onto his. He groans and hitches your leg up around his hip, then shoves his other hand into your pants and begins kneading and spreading your ass cheeks with his palms.

"Fuck I love this tight little ass." He mutters into your mouth as you grind your hips back into his grasp. He gives one of your flanks a little slap drawing a high-pitched squeak of delight from you. "So fuckin' dirty. Just lettin' me play with your ass while you're at work? Hm? You'd let me fuck ya right here, wouldn't ya?"

"Gator..." You growl, but he can tell his words are having an effect on you. He chortles, shaking his head and rutting his solid cock against your front, dragging it teasingly a few times over your throbbing clit.

"Nah, I know. I can't either, got shit to do. But, you'd still let me. If I wanted."

He straightens up, letting your leg fall from his hip as he withdraws from you completely. You roll your eyes and straighten your scrubs, fixing your ponytail in the ambulance side mirror. He adjusts his massive cock into the waistband of his work pants and slides his shades over his eyes.

Just as you try to decide what your next words would even be to this fucked up situationship you can't seem to shake no matter how hard you try (and believe me, you've tried), Steve comes walking briskly around the side of the ambulance to find you.

"Hey! Got the kid all settled in Room 6, Doc McKinley said getting the fingers on should be easy enough. Oh, hey man, what's up? I'm Steve."

Steve holds his hand out to Gator, and to your surprise he grips it without hesitation (although likely with far too much force) and gives it a hearty shake. He smirks in your direction, but you don't really know what that's about.

"Tillman. Gator."

Steve cocks his head in confusion.

"Which one of those...is your first name?"

You giggle and Gator glares at you briefly before returning the heat of his gaze back to Steve.

"Don't gotta worry about it. You can just call me Chief, cause that's what I am. Cool?"

Steve raises his eyebrows, flustered, and stammers,"Oh, yeah, sure, co--" before Gator cuts him off.

"Great. Alright, hon, watch it. I gotta get going."

Gator shuffles by you, purposely brushing his chest far too close to yours, and loads back into the driver's seat. With a wink and a click of his teeth, he turns the engine over and roars out of the bay. His presence is so domineering that you and Steve can't help but just stand there for a moment, basking in it. You turn to him and shake your head in disbelief.

"He used to be our county Deputy, if you can believe that. His dad is still the Sheriff. Roy Tillman?"

"Shit, yeah. I saw the billboard. A hard man..."

"...for hard times. Yeah, that's the one. Gator's...well, he's a lot. And his family is a hell of a lot. But, as much as it may not seem like it, he's a real great medic. Cool under pressure, quick-thinking, reliable. He doesn't quite have the compassionate care part down, but the backbone? He's nothing but." You give Steve a small, tight-lipped smile, not quite understanding why you felt the need to defend that man in front of this one, but you did all the same.

Steve nods but frowns, glancing down at his hand.

"...His, uh...his hand was wet."

You wrinkle your nose, cheeks growing warm with embarrassment at the realization of why Gator had that shit-eating grin on his face when he grabbed Steve's hand -- it was still slick with you. You jerk your head back towards the hospital.

"You better go wash that, hon."

A/N: okokokok this is a quickie but I wanted to get everyone introduced. This is gonna be so fucking fun, I can't wait.

smashingkeys69: west in 3

you rolled your eyes at not only the attempt to speak in code, but also the fact that it had been a month since your little ran in outside the bathrooms and keys still insisted on using your old chat when you were at work, too paranoid of someone reading into your conversations.

your gaze found his over your computer screen and you gave a subtle nod, signaling him to go on. 

you waited exactly two minutes before getting up and walking the same route he had, following a routine that was becoming all too familiar.

the door to the cleaning supply room had barely closed behind you before keys was on you. his grip on your hips felt tight as his fingers digged into the fabric of your pants, pinning you the the wood at your back and getting closer, connecting his lips to the sensitive spot below your ear in an almost sweet kiss just to bite it after.

“aw!” you hit his chest playfully, faking annoyance when in reality the feeling of his teeth sinking on your skin made you shiver.

“that’s for taking too long” his mouth went over to the opposite side of your neck, kissing that same spot, “and that’s for wearing this shirt” keys whispered against your jaw and tugged on the hem of the blue shirt you had on, your arms flew up and he instantly pulled it off and threw it to some place in the dark room that you’d probably struggle to find once you were done. “you know it’s my favorite. that’s why you put it on, didn’t you?”

“i had a rough night” you explained yourself, watching keys wet his lips before dropping his head to nibble at your free chest.

“mhm i wonder why” he teased, fully knowing he had been the reason you had gotten no sleep.

a short moan left your lips when you felt his tongue trace the path between your tits. “some asshole i work with decided to start messing with the code at three a.m.”

“sounds like he was just doing his work” keys managed to mumble against your skin, one of his hands left your hip and dragged over your stomach to cup one of your breasts while he started sucking on the other one.

“nah… he– wanted to rile me up” your own hands found their place on his hair, tugging on the strands when his tongue flicked your nipple.

“and did it work?” the sly grin in his voice told you he was probably smirking at your anger.

keys pressed himself against your thigh, looking for some friction. you decided to comply by moving your left hand down between your bodies, stopping over his obvious erection and rubbing it over his jeans, getting a whimper out of him. “his hand is on my tit right now and i can feel his dick is already hard, so i guess it did”

“good” his mouth left your chest and instead searched for yours, you fixated on it, noticing how it was already a bit swollen. keys traced your lips with the tip of his tongue before kissing you hard, grabbing the sides of your face.

your teeth clicked from the desperate kiss, and the way he always went for your top lip drove you insane. as you swirled your tongue around his you thought about how you’d never tell him no one has kissed you the way he does, sloppy and hot at the same time engulfing you in neediness.

as much as you would’ve loved to keep making out with keys, you pushed him off “we gotta be quick, there’s a meeting in fifteen” you pulled his shirt over his head quickly. you had already known about his happy trail before what you both called ‘the bathroom incident’ happened, but after you hooked up for the first time in that same room his chest hair became one of your favorite things about him.

“we are always quick and still get the job done” he answered, helping you undo the zip of his pants and pulling it down his legs along with his underwear, watching him kick them to the side as you brush your thumb over his tip, smearing the precum all over it. “wait” keys grabbed your wrist and stopped your movements. you looked at him confused, brows scrunched at the sudden halt. he raised your hand until the palm was under your chin, “spit” he ordered.

you saw gaze darken and his lips slightly part open as you angled your face downward, glancing up at him through your eyelashes and letting a string of spit fall on your hand. keys’ eyes never left yours while he released your wrist.

“go on” he nodded and you obeyed, gripping his dick on your spit covered hand and starting to stroke it slowly, his length hardened even more.

he let his forehead rest on your bare shoulder while you masturbated him, earning the most beautiful needy sounds from his mouth.

“fuck” keys whispered, hiding in your neck. he tried to shut himself up by sucking on it again.

“everyone’s probably already at the meeting” you quickened the pace of your strokes, “don’t hold back now”

“shit– i’m ready” he straightened up and pulled your pants down in one swift motion, not even bothering to undo the button. “i need you around me” he begged against your mouth.

“i am around you” you grabbed his dick at the base and made it slap against his own stomach once. keys groaned and closed his eyes for a second.

“you know i mean your pussy” he sneaked his hand under your panties and spread your folds, his thumb found your clit with ease and rubbed at it fast, adding pressure that brought stars to the back of your eyes. “you’re already so wet” he let his index finger inside of you without a warning, curling it and resting it there while he kept murmuring on your lips, “bet you’ve been thinking about this the whole morning”

a nod was all you could manage to give him, your hot breath mixing with his cold exhales.

“tell me what you want” keys asked, releasing you just to instead lock both of your arms above your head.

“i– i want you to fuck me” your body snapped forward, already missing his touch and feeling empty without his finger inside of you.

“ask nicely?”

“oh fuck you walter, you were just whining about how you wanted me around you” you spat at him impatiently.

he slammed your arms against the door and kissed you hungrily, you felt his grip on you falter when he tried to grab both of your wrists with one of his hands so he could lower the other towards his dick, your thighs pressed against each other in anticipation but not for long, being spread apart by his knee.

the drag of the bone on your already sensitive core made you light-headed in the best way possible. if you’d had more time, you would’ve pleasured yourself by riding his thigh until you came. but that wasn’t the case. so instead you hooked your leg on his waist, bringing him closer and moaning his name “keys” at the soft impact of his tip on you. he glid his shaft between your folds once, twice, soaking himself on your arousal before he freed your hands and grabbed your calf, moving it upwards to make space for himself.

he buried himself into you with patience, watching his cock disappear inside of you inch by inch. “shit” he grunted, halting his motion and watching your face. your eyes were closed and your mouth fell open with ragged breaths, getting used to the half of him.

“please– keep going” you said breathlessly without opening your eyes and keys met your wish by thrusting in to the hilt, a gasp choked on your throat. “oh god” you cried out, and hoped that you had been right and everyone had already headed out to the meeting room.

“fuck you’re so tight” keys held your waist firmly, keeping you up as you adjusted to the feeling of his dick spliting you open, still not familiar with his size no matter how many times he had been inside you. “tell me when i can move” he squeezed your flesh gently and you opened your eyes to look at him.

keys’ chest rose up and down rapidly, matching your own.

you rolled your hips before you could talk, “move” he went right at it, pulling out almost completely before he slammed right back in. the lazy rhythm was killing you both. thus, you pulled at his hair harshly and crashed your mouth into his, biting on his lower lip to show him you were fine. “faster keys” you talked, your lips brushed against his when you uttered the words. “you feel so good” his movements didn’t falter but you could tell by the look in his eyes that he was loving it, “filling me up like i was made for you, fucking me so well everytime”

he cooed at your praise and drove forward with growing urge, pounding into you over and over again. “you’ve got no idea what this does to me, taking my dick in your pussy whenever i want to” he pecked your lips, “teasing me all morning with that shirt just ‘cause you wanted me to fuck you in here” your vision got blurry and you were barely able to make out the features of his face, seeing just enough to hook two fingers on his teeth. his mouth closed around them and he sucked your digits, his speaking was distorted by the place you took up “y’gonna touch yourself with those?”

“‘m close” you didn’t answer to his question and didn’t move your fingers.

“i know you are– shit. i can feel you squeezing me” his hands racked up and hid under your boobs after giving a small slap to one of them. keys leaned back just enough to watch the spot where your bodies met, “you like it like that?”

“yes” your legs were about to give in but he fixed his grip on you to keep you steady, groaning at the angle change.

“yes what? i know you can give me more than that” he pressed on.

you whined and tried to form a coherent thought in your head, “i love it when you’re breaking me”

“you didnt get enough of me yesterday?”

“i never get enough of you fucking me”

keys’ mouth was on yours again before you could even think of saying something else, hands roaming freely all over your body like he had also been starving since your brief encounter the previous day. he settled on your ass and hoisted you higher against the door, going even deeper.

you broke the kiss gasping for air, “oh god–”

“touch yourself, use those fingers on you” he pleaded.

somehow, your fingers found their way to your cunt where your bodies entwined. you felt yourself swollen and started to tease your nub, the contrast in keys’ fast slams and your slow rubs was overstimulating soon sending your eyes rolling to the back of your head and making your entire body shake as you sensed your climax getting closer and closer.

“harder” your raw voice was asking for something that didn’t seem possible but that he managed to do with relentless and fast thrusts that made the door rattle.

“yes– fuck– open your eyes i want to see you” keys moaned, his movements getting sloppy as he too was close to his release.

“don’t stop, keys” you pleaded as if he ever would.

“say my name again” he demanded with a growl, “say my name while you cum on my dick”

“keys” you cried, nails clawing down his back, “‘m gonna cum”

“god yes– so perfect” both of your heads spun around, each frantic pound a step closer to your highs.

he kissed you urgently, swallowing your cries as your orgasm tore through you, your walls clenching around keys’ cock just as hard as your legs and arms did the same around his middle. you broke the kiss to scream his name, trembling against his sweat covered chest.

the way you were squeezing him broke keys as he buried himself deep one last time, his own release hitting hard and warm inside. his moans were more like whimpers as he spilled into you. “shit– baby, oh my fucking god” you were still too drunk on him to realize the nickname that escaped him.

for a moment, the only sounds in the tiny room were your heavy breathing and occasional low moans as you both came to.

finally, it was him who broke the silence. “y’now what could make this even better”

“shut up” you couldn’t believe he was already thinking about the next time when you could still feel his dick pulsing.

“a bed.” you rolled your eyes, “yours or mine what d’you think?”

you pushed yourself off of him, almost losing your balance once your feet hit the ground, but he caught you.

“i think you better start getting dressed and head out” you directed, looking for your own clothes. you knew you’d have trouble finding your shirt.

keys huffed and looked at you while he got dressed, walking over to your still naked frame less than a meter away just to place a sweet kiss on your shoulder and leave the room as if he hadn’t just made your heart skip a beat. you brushed it off and found the blue piece of fabric.

five minutes later you made your way into the meeting room and sat down right across from keys. he immediately nudged your leg with his feet, making you look at him.

he nodded to your phone and you took it in your hands, reading the notification on the screen.

smashingkeys69: text u tonight?

taglist: everyone here either commented on the first part asking for a second one, liked my taglist post or commented it, if you wish to be removed please just let me know <3

and it can always get worse, because boo had planned a short trip for the week but everything fell apart when his boss called him on sunday saying she couldn't let him off anymore because she needed to travel with her family.

and that's how seungkwan is now: in charge of the store and with blood in his eyes.

meanwhile, you enter the store almost desperately seeking salvation. your cousin's wedding is next week, and you still don't have a dress. you even bought one or two on shein, but they definitely only looked good on the models…

“hi,” you say gently as you enter, “i'm looking for a dress.”

seungkwan puts down the magazine he's reading, scanning the entire store as if showing you the thousands of options available. “what kind of dress?”

“to be honest?” you sigh, “i have no idea. can you help me?” you try to read his name on his name tag. “seungkwan, right?” you smile at the handsome sales assistant.

he gives a slight smile; people don't usually pay attention to his name, they don't even bother to read the name tag around his body, so he decides to be a little nicer. he starts walking around the store, showing you the options, "what do you like? floral? pastel? something basic?"

"nothing basic, please!"

he laughs, perhaps the first genuine laugh he's given in weeks. "okay, okay. what's the occasion?"

and while you tell him your whole story about your cousin's wedding dress, which you don't even like *that* much but need to wear to avoid more family problems, seungkwan starts to notice you.

not exactly because you're pretty, he serves so many customers every day that it doesn't attract much attention anymore, but because, besides being pretty, smelling good, and attractive, you're polite and care about him, telling him family gossip as if you were close friends, looking him in the eyes, and calling him by name without hesitation.

and that's dangerous, because seungkwan is so tired that he doesn't know if he can handle someone so… you. someone who, without realizing it, makes him forget for a few minutes that he hates his job.

and who, of course, is incredibly hot.

“want to try this one on? it's on sale for $15.” he says, pulling a dress off the rack, which really seems to be one of the most beautiful dresses you've ever seen in your life.

you look at the tag out of habit, staring at him suspiciously. “seungkwan, here it's $90”

but he doesn't seem to care much, "it's seungkwan's special promotion. a pretty woman pays just what i want."

"are you sure this won't give you problems? i can pay the original price, no problem, sweetheart."

"just t-try the dress!" he chokes.

it's not like there couldn't be a problem, but at the same time, seungkwan has worked there for so long that he knows his boss won't even notice it's missing; she doesn't even look at the stock, let alone notice the disappearance of a single dress.

you enter the fitting room, and the man lets out a breath he didn't even know he was holding, then realizes he's completely screwed.

"do you think it looks good?" you open the curtain.

the tight dress squeezing your tits, highlighting your waist, and making seungkwan drool, damn, you look fucking gorgeous in that outfit. seungkwan stares at you for too long, completely speechless.

“damn, you look gorgeous.”

“do i really? or are you just trying to sell me something to earn a commission, huh?” you give him a light tap on the arm, looking back at yourself in the mirror.

“definitely, my salary depends on your $12 dress.” he teases, making you laugh at his audacity, the atmosphere becoming too comfortable… “seriously, you look fucking gorgeous.” his eyes fall back on your body, the tip of his lip being bitten.

you bite the inside of your cheek, trying to control the smirk that is forming, adjusting the strap of the dress on your shoulder and staring at the salesman again through the mirror, noticing how much he seems to be controlling himself to avoid devouring you. “i don’t know if i trust you that much, i think you’re just saying that to make me buy it.”

“i think it’s pretty clear that i don’t care about the sale.” he leans against the dressing room wall, staring at you from head to toe, noticing the tight fabric on your backside, thinking things that are far too inappropriate for someone on the job.

“i’ll take it!” you try to deflect, for the sake of both your sanity.

seungkwan is gorgeous, the black dress shirt tucked into his forearms, the tailored trousers highlighting his legs, the crooked badge on his chest, everything about him seems unfairly attractive. and maybe it’s the stress, the playful way he talks, maybe the fact that he’s devouring you with his eyes, you don’t know, but you’re losing your mind with the man in there.

“ah, seungkwan,” you call the salesperson again. “i really need a skirt for a birthday party, do you have any here?”

“a family birthday or…?”

“slut skirt.” you laughs.

he stares at you in silence. then he lets out a laugh so genuine that he shakes his head without even noticing.

“you wanna kill me, don’t you? i’ll see what i can do.”

he walks away through the store again and you close the fitting room curtain, staring at your reflection for a few seconds. fuck, it had been a long time since you felt this much lust for someone you didn’t know.

meanwhile, outside, seungkwan tries to pretend he can think straight. failing miserably, because in his head all he wants at that moment is to have sex with you in the store's fitting room.

but amidst his lustful thoughts, he grabs a tighter black skirt, along with a random shirt, honestly barely paying attention to what he chooses, because if he thinks about you wearing anything, he knows he’ll go crazy.

“i found another option,” he says, approaching the fitting room. “i think-”

and he opens the curtain before even finishing the sentence.

silence.

you freeze instantly.

because in the middle of changing clothes, you're only in your panties and bra.

seungkwan stares at you, completely speechless. his eyes wander down your semi-nude body without any filter. and damn, you're much hotter than he thought.

"oh, fuck," he swallows hard, looking away too late. "sorry."

but he doesn't leave, doesn't even threaten to close the fitting room curtain, and you both notice it.

the silence seems to suffocate you, not from discomfort, but from lust. the damn skirt is still in seungkwan's hand, while he remains standing, totally unable to think, staring at your body once more, blatantly looking at your panties.

“i-i always ask if i can come in, sorry!” despite the words, he doesn't look at your face, but rather at the damn panties you're wearing.

“if i were bothered, i'd tell you to leave…” you say sincerely, his gaze burning into you.

seungkwan has been living on autopilot for months, working himself to the bone, freaking out over clients, sleeping little and having even less sex… he really doesn't even remember the last time he had sex.

and then you appear, gentle, fragrant, and now half-naked in front of him inside a tiny fitting room, looking as if you're also going crazy with all of this.

he's going to lose it.

“you're trying to kill me.” he murmurs almost to himself, wiping his mouth as his gaze drops to your body again, without any shame. “no, seriously.” he laughs weakly, completely disbelieving. “i open the curtain and find you in just your panties.”

his eyes stop on the black fabric once more.

“and this damn pantie is still pretty.”

“it’s just a basic one,” you retort, glancing down quickly. “it doesn’t even have lace.”

“then take it off.” he laughs, trying to joke, but you both realize it wasn’t a joke.

his gaze remains fixed on you, burning you, seungkwan already completely out of control. his own smile slowly fades as he realizes what he just said.

“damn…” he runs a hand over his face, letting out a disbelieving laugh. “sorry. i definitely shouldn’t have said that.”

you don’t react, you don’t reprimand him, because all you can feel is your panty getting wet, the heavy silence, you imagining what he would be like on top of you.

“where’s your boss?”

he laughs irritably, “somewhere out of the country with the family.”

the sentence being the end of any sanity between you, because that's when you kiss him. pulling him roughly by the collar of his shirt, standing on tiptoe to reach his full lips.

the first shock is somewhat violent, almost desperate, and you take a while to adjust your rhythm. his firm hands gripping your hips, his fingers touching the thin fabric of your panties, while you unbutton your dress shirt.

“fuck, we can't do this here.”

but at the same time he makes no move to stop, his firm hand pulling your bare thighs, then playing with the band of your bra, until finally putting a hand inside, squeezing your tits with desire, making you sigh into his mouth.

“hot, so beautiful!” seungkwan unbuttons your bra, then takes off his own shirt.

the fitting room is cramped, without much space for the two of you; clearly not made for what's happening there, but lust speaks louder.

his finger slides easily under your panties, pushing the fabric aside and playing with the wetness between your legs, rubbing his middle finger against your entrance just to see you squeeze your eyes shut.

he brings his finger to his mouth, tasting a little of your flavor, becoming somewhat frustrated when he realizes he can't suck you there, the space is ridiculously small.

"you're still gonna come in my mouth," he says before returning his finger to your cunt

now, slowly inserting it, feeling you gag in his mouth, swallowing your soft moans as your pussy opens wide, accepting him.

"all open for me, babe?"

the affectionate nickname makes you tremble, and he takes advantage to insert another finger, feeling you all wet, accepting him so well.

“s-seungkwan”

the moan is almost like music to him, his fingers going deep into your pussy, your clit hitting the palm of his hand as he stretches you wide.

your hand squeezes his cock through his pants, rubbing it and seeing how big it is, damn, you want this man inside you. you unbutton and unzip his pants shamelessly, whimpering while he still puts his fingers in your hole.

“kwan,” the nickname comes sweetly from your lips. “fuck… fuck, fuck me.”

“ princess, i don’t have a condom here.”

and it's obvious you don't have one either; it was just a trip to the clothing store, you didn't expect to end up in this situation.

seungkwan continues to insert his fingers into you, pulling them out and thrusting them in with a somewhat rough speed, but it's not enough, you need him completely.

"i... i'm on birth control, p-please."

seungkwan growls, "you're making me completely lose control!" he knows it's wrong to have sex without a condom, but he hasn't been able to think straight for a long time.

and then you hear his pants falling to the floor, and you feel him pushing you against the wall, your leg gripping his hip, exposing you even more.

you can't see it, but you feel the head of his thick cock rubbing against you, "are you sure?" seungkwan asks, and your only response is a somewhat pathetic moan.

and he enters, his thick cock stretching your pussy wide, leaving you wide open for him.

“it’s squeezing me tight.” he kisses you awkwardly, his teeth chattering, while every inch of his cock opens you up more and more. “fuck, you’re so hot.”

and when he finally thrusts inside you, seungkwan pulls out all at once, only to thrust back in again, his cock impaling you forcefully, hitting your uterus, and just when you get used to it, seungkwan’s rhythm is brutal.

“swallowing me whole, sweetheart.”

he’s angry, angry at his job, at his boss, angry at not being where he thought he’d be at this point in his career, and he takes all that anger out on your pussy, thrusting hard while he fucks you in the store fitting room.

“k-kwan,” you moan his name, trying to say how good it feels, but the disjointed moans are louder, making you cling to his shoulders.

the thin walls of the fitting room begin to tremble, he opens your legs wider at his waist, making his entire cock enter you.

"such a good pussy!"

you try to moan quietly, because if someone comes into the store you're screwed, but it's impossible, his cock is hitting you in the right place, making your eyes roll back.

"is it good? tell me," he asks hoarsely, almost as if he needs confirmation after all this time without sex.

the heat in the fitting room is unbearable, the ceiling fan not helping at all, sweat drips from seungkwan's forehead, his body contracting as he continues to fuck you.

your wet pussy accepting his thick cock without complaint, you wrap your arm completely around his neck, moaning like a little slut.

you start to tense up on seungkwan's cock, moaning that you're going to come, and that drives him even crazier. he fixes your hair that was starting to fall on your forehead, gives you a quick kiss and thrusts again.

"are you gonna  come for me, slut? come, love."

and when your pussy tightens as if it wants to swallow him whole, seungkwan gives a sadistic laugh, the brutal relief after months of not being able to fuck because of that damn job was happening right there in the fitting room.

and you come, your legs trembling and making you weak in his arms, covering his entire cock with your juices.

and seungkwan feels it, feels your pussy contracting, feels your fluid running down his cock, and he continues thrusting slowly, his spasms still ravaging you completely.

"so beautiful!" and he comes.

seungkwan comes almost painfully, after months he's finally coming on something that isn't his own hand. the thick, heavy, warm stuff going inside you, sticking to you completely, filling you up.

and he doesn't stop thrusting until the last drop is out, until it's dripping down your legs.

and even then, when it's over, it's still stuck to you.

your leg slides off his hip, your face still buried in his neck, breathing heavily.

"damn, i really needed that."

a few minutes later you look at each other, laughing a little foolishly at the crazy idea you both had. the fitting room smells of sex and sweat, and seungkwan clearly isn't in any condition to continue his shift.

"you're fucking beautiful," he says, a little foolishly.

"me? damn, you don't know what i felt when i walked into the store and saw you.."

and you stay there, laughing, exchanging caresses and compliments.

"ah, i really want the dress, and the skirt too… i'll wear them on our first date."

“first date?”

“yes? you wanna sleep with me in the fitting room and leave it at that?” he teased, it was already clear that this wasn't the intention of either of you.

“never.”

you stayed in the fitting room for a few more long minutes, a few more kisses, some playful banter, until finally going to the front of the store. he insisted on keeping the r$60 discount on the dress and the skirt as a ‘store gift’ for first-time purchases.

and well, when he texted you after work, you were quick to make plans for the weekend.

The classroom was louder than usual. Since it was break time, students were doing everything except reviewing for their upcoming long test in their major subject. Someone was blasting music at full volume, a group of friends was arguing over some random pencil, and half of the students were busy cramming reviewers at their seats.

Meanwhile, I was just zoning out by the window, questioning every decision I had ever made in life.

 “I’m going to fail, then I won’t get rich, and then—”

Suddenly, the chair beside me scraped against the floor before a familiar hand placed an iced matcha latte on my table.

“You’re being dramatic again. You say that every week.”

I slowly turned my head and stared at my best friend, Wonwoo, with tired, blank eyes. 

“Because every week feels like my last. They’re killing me,” I groaned.

“That’s dramatic.” I heard him chuckle softly. I rolled my eyes at him.

“Yet you still bought me my dear matcha, though.” He ignored my comment and finally sat beside me, pulling out my practice sheet from underneath my book. His eyebrows furrowed immediately.

“You didn’t answer anything. What is this? A painting to stare at?” he teased.

“I was waiting for motivation to come,” I shrugged.

“You had a week, y/n.”

“Yeah, I was waiting for stronger motivation to motivate me.” That made him laugh.

God.

I hated how that stupid laugh was seriously becoming a huge problem for me.

Fine. I’ll admit it.

I had a crush on him.

But I won’t tell you it’s been years.

“Come here.” Wonwoo adjusted his glasses before slowly pulling my chair closer to his.

“Huh? Why?” I asked, confused.

“I’ll teach you before you embarrass both of us.”

My eyes widened dramatically. “That’s so mean, Jeon Wonwoo.”

“As your seatmate, your grades affect me emotionally.”I tried not to smile at that. He’s always like this. Acting like he cared—

“As your seatmate…”

Right. I forgot about that part.

As he started explaining the lesson beside me, the classroom noise slowly faded into the background. Wonwoo knew me too well. He never failed to speak calmly whenever I panicked over something. And maybe that was exactly why I was so hopelessly into him.

“Hey, still confused?” He waved a hand in front of my face after noticing my silence.

I blinked quickly. “No. I’m listening. Trust me.” He smirked. “Really? You’ve been staring at me for the past forty seconds.” All the blood rushed to my face.

“I was not! Stop assuming,” I defended myself quickly while looking away.

“You were.”

“I was thinking!”

“Hmm?” He leaned slightly closer. “While staring at my lips?”

I choked on absolutely nothing.

Wait.

My eyes were on his lips?

Wonwoo glanced at me with clear amusement in his eyes, and God knew I hated him for it.

Well… not really.

Maybe a little.

Okay, not at all.

“You’re actually insane,” I muttered.

“Mhm.”

The corners of his lips lifted slightly before he returned to his normal expression like he didn’t just make my heart do backflips inside my chest on a random Tuesday morning. I immediately stood up from my seat.

“I can’t do this anymore. Seungkwan, throw your friend away! He’s getting on my nerves.” I massaged my forehead, trying to hide my burning face before walking outside the classroom to cool down.

“You forgot your paper.”

I opened my eyes and saw Wonwoo standing in front of me, holding my blank worksheet while the other hand rested inside his pocket.

“Keep it,” I muttered dramatically.

“So you’re giving up?” I nodded. “I’m finally giving up on life.” His laugh echoed again. That stupid, stupid laugh.

“You’re blushing,” he teased.

“I’m not! It’s just hot here.”

“Mhm.”

“Whatever. I hate you.” Before I could walk away, I heard him mumble,

“You say that a lot for someone who keeps staring at my mouth.” I gasped dramatically before marching back into the classroom.

++

I didn’t sit beside Wonwoo during lunch.I didn’t have the courage to after he caught me staring at him like some lovesick idiot. I was currently lying face-down on my desk, muttering nonsense to myself while questioning my entire existence.

“Bro, just confess already.” Soonyoung nudged my elbow.

“TO WHO? I DON’T LIKE ANYONE.” The entire cafeteria went quiet for two seconds.

Oops.

“It’s your fault, Hosh,” I grumbled while hiding my face inside my hoodie. “Why me?!” he whined dramatically. Mingyu stared at me like I was the dumbest person alive.

“You literally look at Wonwoo like we’re not even in the same classroom as you.”

“I do not!”

“Yes, you do,” Seungkwan cut in immediately. “It’s honestly disgusting at this point.” I groaned loudly. “Why are you all attacking me?”

“Because you’re hopeless!” Seungkwan snapped dramatically. “And he likes you too!”

“He does not.”

“Girl, WE CAN SEE IT!”

Hoshi and Mingyu burst into laughter at Seungkwan’s frustrated expression.

“He looks at you like you’re the only girl around,” Seungkwan continued. “Do you notice how he talks to other girls? He’s literally nonchalant with everyone except you.”

“Kwan, calm down,” Soonyoung laughed while holding his shoulder. “Let her realize it herself. She’s still in her denial stage.”

“One day,” Seungkwan sighed dramatically, “you two are either going to end up together or become each other’s biggest ‘what if.’”

I slumped against my chair.

“He doesn’t like me. Trust me. I know his type.” And it definitely wasn’t me. Back in tenth grade, Wonwoo once said he would never date a close friend because he didn’t want to ruin the friendship. And unfortunately for me?I was his best friend.

++

“Excuse me?”

I turned around and saw a student awkwardly scratching the back of his neck.

“I’m new here,” he said shyly. “Do you know where the library is?”

“Oh, yeah.”

I explained the directions quickly while he listened carefully. “Third floor, then turn right, then left. You’ll see it immediately.” He smiled softly.

“Thank you.”

“No problem.”

“Done flirting?” I turned around and immediately saw Wonwoo standing behind me.

“Huh? I wasn’t flirting with him,” I defended quickly. “He was asking for directions.” Wonwoo walked beside me.

“Mom asked if you wanted to have dinner with us tonight.” Normally, I would’ve agreed immediately. But after everything lately? Absolutely not.

“I can’t. I have something to do.”

“By ‘something,’ what exactly?”

I froze.

“…School stuff.” He raised an eyebrow.

“As far as I know, we’re in the same class and we have nothing due.” I avoided his eyes.

“I just… have things to do.” I immediately tried walking away, but he suddenly grabbed my wrist. I stumbled slightly and accidentally bumped into his chest.

Too close. Way too close.

“What are you doing?” I whispered nervously.

 “Are you avoiding me?” 

My breath hitched. “I-I’m not.”

“Really?” He leaned slightly closer. “Because it feels like you are.” I looked away immediately before he could notice how red my face had gotten.

“You’re overthinking.”

“Then why won’t you even look at me properly anymore?” His voice became quieter this time. And somehow, that hurt more.

“You know what hurts the most?” he asked softly.

I stayed silent.

“You stopped looking for me first.”

My chest tightened immediately. “Wonwoo—”

“Did I do something wrong?” I quickly shook my head. “You didn’t.”

“Then stop avoiding me.”

God.

Why was he making this so hard?

++

Weeks passed, and avoiding Wonwoo became exhausting. Especially because he always saved the seat beside him in every class. And every single time, I ignored it. Instead, I sat beside Junhui, the new student.

“I don’t understand anything,” Junhui whispered dramatically during class.

I laughed quietly. “That’s because you sleep through every lecture.”

“Because it’s boring.”

“Class dismissed.”

“Yah, Junhui! Where are you going?!” He waved lazily before disappearing immediately. I sighed while packing my things.

Then—

“y/n.”

I froze.

“Can we talk?”

++

“Cheesecake?” Wonwoo looked up from the menu.I nodded tiredly.

We had just finished a long quiz, and honestly, my brain felt dead. An awkward silence settled between us after we sat down. Then Wonwoo finally spoke.

“You’re avoiding me.” Straight to the point. Of course. I stayed silent.

“Do we have a problem?” he asked quietly. “Because honestly? I’m starting to get upset.” I looked down at my hands. “You spend more time with that guy than me now.”

Oh.

So he noticed everything too.

“Do you like him?” 

My head snapped up immediately. “Of course not!”

Wonwoo leaned back slightly. “Then why are you avoiding me?”

Because I like you.

Because every little thing you do affects me too much.

Because I’m scared.

But instead, I just whispered, “I’m busy.”

“You said that two weeks ago.”

Silence.

Then suddenly—

“Fuck it, y/n. Just tell me.” His frustrated sigh made my chest ache.

“I don’t like that guy,” I muttered.

“Then stop talking to him.”

“We’re friends.”

“And what are we?” I froze. Wonwoo stared at me seriously.

“Are we strangers now?”

“No—”

“Because it feels like it.” His voice softened. “It’s been years, y/n.”

That was it. I broke. “That’s the problem, Wonwoo.”

He went silent immediately.

“I don’t see you as my best friend anymore.” His expression slowly fell.

“I like you, okay?” I laughed humorlessly. “I like you so much that it’s embarrassing.” I swallowed hard. “And I hate that everything you do feels normal to you while I’m over here overthinking every little thing.” My eyes burned.

“That’s why I’ve been avoiding you. I was trying to get rid of my feelings before I ruined everything between us.” Silence. Complete silence.

Without thinking, I stood up immediately and walked out of the café. Perfect timing. Rain started pouring heavily outside. People stared at me while I walked aimlessly under the rain, but I didn’t care anymore.

I ruined everything.

“Wait!”

Suddenly, someone grabbed my wrist.

Wonwoo.

“I like you too, y/n.”

I froze.

Rain soaked his hair while he looked at me breathlessly.

“Do you know how hard it was pretending I was okay these past few weeks?” His grip softened. “I thought you were tired of me.”

My chest tightened painfully.

“And seeing you with someone else was driving me insane.” I stared at him speechlessly. 

“Huh?” Wonwoo laughed softly. “I said I like you too, dummy.” I immediately pushed him away lightly. 

“I hate you.”

“You don’t.”

Unfortunately? He was right.

++

We ended up at his dorm since it was closer, completely drenched from the rain. Wonwoo lent me one of his hoodies and sweatpants that were obviously too big on me. After showering, we ended up lying on his bed while the rain echoed softly outside.

“So…” he started quietly.

“Hm?”

“Can I court you properly?” I laughed.

“We’ve literally known each other for years.”

“I know.” He smiled softly at me. “But I still want to do things properly.” My cheeks warmed.

“I want to prove that I’m serious about you,” he continued quietly. “I’ll never get tired of loving you.”

God. This man was dangerous.

“Okay,” I whispered shyly.

Wonwoo smiled so softly it almost made my heart explode.

“Thank you.” Then he gently kissed my forehead.

“You know,” he mumbled sleepily afterward.

“Hm?”

“You stared at my lips for forty seconds and still took months to confess.” I gasped dramatically before smacking his chest. His laughter immediately filled the room. And somehow, for the first time in weeks—Everything finally felt okay.

++

Meanwhile…

Mr. Boo: WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?

Sent a photo. (😮 2)

Tiger Hosh: WOAH???

Dawg Gyu: WHY DO YOU TWO LOOK LIKE YOU’RE FILMING A K-DRAMA???

Mr. Boo:WHY ARE THEY HUGGING IN THE RAIN???

Tiger Hosh: WAIT OMG THEY CONFESSED DIDN’T THEY???

Dawg Gyu: WHERE IS Y/N???

WHY ISN’T SHE REPLYING???

Mr. Boo: OH MY GOD THEY’RE PROBABLY TOGETHER RIGHT NOW

Tiger Hosh: I KNEW IT!!!

I DESERVE CREDIT FOR THIS RELATIONSHIP

Mr. Boo: YOU DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING

Tiger Hosh: EMOTIONAL SUPPORT COUNTS

Dawg Gyu: Should we pretend to be surprised tomorrow?

Mr. Boo: No. I want them embarrassed.

Six months ago you hadn’t even left your state before, your time was taken up by working endless jobs to make rent on time, and when you actually had time for yourself—it was spent dreaming you could do more.

“I wanna give you the whole world, baby.” Steve had said after asking you to be his, and you could only nod through bleary eyes.

Santorini was beautiful to say the least, he had booked a luxury villa to give you all the space to relax without the bustle of other tourists, alongside access to a private beach.

“Can’t say I’d be happy with other men looking at you in a bikini.” He shrugged, and you rolled your eyes playfully at his protective nature.

You were kicked back, lying on a tanning bed and soaking up all the sun your two week long trip had to offer. Steve had just emerged from the ocean, grabbing a beach towel and patting himself dry, his eyes staring at you with admiration.

“You’re not gonna get in the water, sweets?” He questioned, sitting down next to you, the water droplets from his hair dripping onto you.

“Maybe in a bit, I don’t really feel like getting my hair wet.” You sighed, sitting up on the palms of your hands.

Steve leaned forwards, pressing his lips against the bare skin of your shoulders and kissing repeatedly. “Well y’should before it gets cold.” He mumbled against your shoulder, and squished your nose against his forehead, inhaling the scent of salty seawater.

You stayed like that for a moment—just content with each other's presence while your eyes strayed to the breathtaking view in front of you.

“I wish we could stay here forever.” You offhandedly mentioned, not wanting to return back to the life that awaited you.

He chuckled and squeezed your hand affectionately. “This doesn’t have to be the last time we come back.” Steve promised. “On our honeymoon, I’ll take you somewhere even better.” He winked, a dark blush bloomed onto your face—though it wasn’t from the sun.

He suddenly got up, fishing around in the little tote bag you had carried down and pulling out a small portable camera. You figured he wanted to capture the moment, the white, shimmering sand where it met the gentle waves—but you were proven wrong when he turned it around onto you, lowering his stance slightly to get a better angle.

You buried your face into your hands shyly, as Steve tilted his head at you. “C’mon baby, just one picture.” He begged. “So we can look back at this together.”

You reluctantly pulled your hands away at his coaxing, sighing but squinting at the camera as a wide smile overtook your features.

“So gorgeous.” He muttered as the snapping sounds went off.

“Alright that’s enough—my turn.” You shuffled forwards to take the camera from his hands and raised it to fit Steve in the frame.

He posed jokingly as you took several photos, giggling at his commentary. “Do I look handsome?”

“Hm, maybe not more than me.” You retorted playfully, and he dramatically gasped, lunging to swallow you in his arms.

“Take that back!” He exclaimed, but it only caused you to laugh until your sides hurt, fighting to be released from his grasp.

“I think you’re starting to turn pink from the sun, old man” you pointed out his mature age, only in his late thirties, but enough to be used against him.

“Who are you calling old man? Younger men pray for a body like this.” He scoffed. “You didn’t seem to have any complaints when we met.” He pinched your side. “We better get back inside before I get sunburnt and make you rub aloe Vera all over me.” He said, pulling you up.

You threw on your swimsuit cover up dress while Steve started packing your things up, then guiding you back to your villa.

Even though you hadn’t gotten in the water, and there would be many more opportunities to feel the ocean, you still felt hot enough to take a shower.

Steve had the same thinking, his lower calves covered in sand and skin rising in temperature. Wasting no time, he grabbed your hand and led you into the huge bathroom, though you stalled slightly.

“Do you not wanna shower first?” You asked confused.

“The shower’s big enough to fit two.” He stated, and you couldn’t help but wonder how showering with Steve would be like.

He turned on the spray of the water and both of you started to shed your clothes, Steve quickly taking off his swim trunks as you averted your eyes and you untied your bikini.

He allowed you to step in first under the cool water, sighing from the relief. He got in behind and swept his hair back, before picking up the shampoo bottle squeezing a dime size onto his palm.

Instead of washing his own, Steve directed you to give him your back as he ran his fingers through your hair, spreading out the product through your scalp until it turned into soapy suds.

You let out a breathy moan as he massaged your head longer than necessary, his habit of being a giver taking over. After a couple of moments, you turned around again to dunk your hair beneath the shower head, rinsing it out.

You copied his movements, delicately lathering the foam through his hair as he bent down slightly for you to be able to reach. You took your time, pressing a wet kiss against his forehead to signal you were done.

Steve washed your body with care, using his own body wash—having mentioned before he loved when you smelled like him. You had no protests, feeling his hands slide over your skin and practically worshipping it.

After the routine was over, you didn’t get out right away, he settled his hands around you and brought you into a sweet kiss, you returned it with equal passion. A sound left your throat as he pushed you against the shower wall, deepening the kiss as his tongue moved against yours, in lazy motions.

You tangled your hands in his wet hair, pulling him impossible closer as you savored the warmth he provided you, under the now cold water. He moved to your jaw, suckling the skin while you panted heavily.

Things could’ve gone further, though you pushed him away with a sorry smile on your face. “It’s really cold.” You confessed quietly, and Steve laughed, turning off the water.

You two stepped out and he handed you a robe, giving you another quick kiss. By the time you dried your hair and got dressed again, your stomach was rumbling with the desire for Greek food.

“We haven’t eaten anything since this morning.” You complained with a groan, and Steve wasn’t about to let his girl starve.

Steve took you to a cliff side restaurant, perched high above the ocean where the white stone terraces looked like it had been carved by the ground itself. Softly dimmed lanterns flickered on each table as the sun began to set, casting an orange glow as the sky melted into shades of pink and red.

You could only hear the sound of the breeze as it flowed around you, the distant waves that broke against the shore below. The scenery looked like it had been plucked straight out of a painting, something only the greatest of artists could reflect.

Steve kept a hand through yours throughout the entire dinner, as though right where it was meant to be. There was no need to fill the silence with words—the steady grip of his hands, the smile that never seemed to leave his face, and his lasting presence anchored everything to him.

To make things worse, in the middle of the hot day the air conditioner decided to randomly shut down and stopped working. When you attempted to open all the windows, it only circulated the heated air back through the room, offering no refuge or comfort. You tried calling repair technicians, but their prices were unreasonably high—practically a rip off, and none of them could come on short notice, which meant there was only one choice left.

You bit your lower lip while staring at the telephone, contemplating if this was a good idea or not, though the idea of having to suffer one more second and possibly putting yourself at risk for a heat stroke had you picking up the phone, dialing Steve’s number.

On the second ring he picked up. “Hello?” He said, the caller unknown to him.

You breathed shakily, “h-hey Steve, it’s me—the girl next door. The one that brought you cookies the other day, if you remember…” you instantly wanted to slap yourself, who else could it be.

“Oh!” Steve responded, familiarity seeping into his voice. “How could I forget? I was meaning to tell you they were amazing, thank you sweetheart.”

You felt your face go hot, and it wasn’t from the heat. “You’re welcome.” You rushed out. “I don’t want to bother you, but I’m kind of in a situation.” You started.

“What’s going on?” You could instantly hear the concern in his tone, imagining the cute furrow of his brows.

“It’s just—my air conditioner broke, and I kind of need some help.” You weighed your words, fearing his reaction.

“Awh, you poor thing.” Steve spoke low. “You must feel so hot,” the word came out sharply, sending a spark through you. “I really don’t mind coming over and taking a look at it.”

You lit up, a smile overtaking your features at his kindness. “Really?” You exclaimed.

“Of course.” He laughed lightly. “I’ll come right now—so we can get it fixed up as soon as possible.”

You quickly agreed, and in only five minutes Steve was already at your door, knocking loudly. You raced to it, a hand kept behind your back as you swung it open with a smile on your face. He was dressed similarly for the weather, a wife beater that hugged his shoulders and showed the beginnings of his chest hair peaking out.

“Thank you for coming over, really!” You said profusely, as Steve gave you a once over, visibly swallowing at how little there was to imagine from all the skin showing.

“Not a problem, sweetheart.” He said with a grin, letting himself in. You led him towards the ac unit in the back, and Steve placed his hands on his hips, observing it carefully.

You stood behind him as he took the lid off, searching for the root of the problem. You tried not to let your eyes linger on the way his back muscles flexed with each movement, accentuating his fit figure.

“Looks like I found the issue.” He called out, snapping you out of your daydreaming. Your head perked up, coming a little closer.

“The air filter is clogged—meaning all the dust and whatnot got trapped inside.” Steve explained, turning back towards you. “I can clean it out with a vacuum, it’s good you called me and not some know it all who would’ve charged you double.” He smiled.

“So I’m in good hands?” You rechecked, staring up at him through your lashes.

“Always, sweetheart.” He winked playfully. You nodded gratefully, and retreated to bring all the tools he needed. Steve couldn’t help but watch how you swung your hips as you walked, having no idea about the things you do to him.

He started working while you watched him closely, though secretly he was taking his sweet time—being around you was intoxicating, and Steve was addicted. After a couple of minutes, you silently gasped as you realized he was probably suffering just as much as you were—and you disappeared without a warning to make him a small treat.

You stood in the kitchen, squeezing fresh lemons and pouring handfuls of ice into a glass pitcher, the sharp citrus scent filling the air. A final pinch of sugar dissolved into the pale yellow liquid, condensation already gathering along the cool glass—a stark contrast to the hot atmosphere. Just looking at it caused your mouth to water, it was bound to count as a token of appreciation for Steve.

You filled up another glass to the brim as you brought it up, noticing how sweat gathered at Steve’s hairline and the pink glow that took over his face.

He craned his neck back, mouth parting when he finally saw you again. “Oh you angel—” he groaned dramatically. “That’s exactly what I need!”

You giggled softly while extending him the cup, his rough fingers touching yours momentarily as he took it. Wasting no time, Steve tilted his head back and downed the cool drink, Adam’s apple bobbing as he consumed it greedily.

“I think you should just make me everything at this point.” He panted, wiping his sticky mouth with the back of his hand.

“Well you’re the one doing the hard work.” You said pointedly, and he shrugged.

“Nothing I wouldn’t already do for you.” Steve said, and you tried not to let your mind wander at what he meant.

Unfortunately, Steve finished sooner than you wanted expected, and you were trying to think of more ways to prolong his exit.

“Well, sweet girl—if that’s all, I’ll leave you be.” He sighed, wiping his hands on a washcloth.

You nodded, “I don’t know how thank you enough for this Steve. You’re a life saver,” you said honestly while leading him back to your door.

A subtle smirk worked its way onto his face, trailing his eyes all over you. “I can think of a way you can thank me, angel.” He dragged out dangerously, though you were unaware of his true intentions.

“What’s that?” You eagerly spoke up, eyes wide and awaiting—Steve couldn’t resist himself at how submissive you looked, ready to do anything to please him.

Slowly, he took a step closer, until you were inches apart. He laid a hand over your waist—you froze at the action, and he closed off the remaining distance with a gentle kiss against your pink lips.

It made you breathless in the best possible way, you practically melted into it, kissing back before you could come to the realization it was your neighbor’s lips who was on yours. Steve depended the kiss into something unforgettable, pulling you flush against his chest as your face tilted up even higher, his tongue slipping into your mouth and coaxing out a moan.

It ended all too soon, Steve pulling away before you could roam your hands all over him, wanting to feel more.

All of your current tattoos are from him too. Tiny constellations scattered along your ribs. The moth beneath your collarbone that he freehanded at three in the morning because neither of you could sleep. A koi fish running down the curve of your hip. Every single piece carries his fingerprints in it somewhere.

The fairy lights hung around the room have been dimmed low, the coffee table pushed aside, and his client chair unfolded in the open space near the big window. Soft rain taps against the glass from the outside, and some calm lo-fi music plays throughout the apartment to set the mood and calm your nerves, even if you’ve planned this for a while𑁋Joshua had sacrificed hours upon hours to bring your idea to life. You can’t back away from this now. 

The idea is a long, elegant spine tattoo: a powerful dragon that coils gracefully down your back with its body and sharp scales interwoven with delicate cherry blossoms. Strength and softness tangled together, exactly as you had imagined. You remember when you first told him about it and the way his eyes had grown wide, like a mixture of excitement and awe, but also… a subtle pinch of fear.

Because it’s you, and he knows that he can’t afford to screw up, especially with something as permanent as a tattoo. You’re willingly offering a big piece of yourself for him to mark, and that’s a huge weight he’s had to carry while sketching out your concept. There’s no undo button for that kind of trust. 

“I’ve thought about this for a long time, Shua,” You tell him firmly, though there’s that twitch of your nerves to your voice that doesn’t go unnoticed. “There’s no going back now.”

Joshua’s eyes turn fond, taking a step closer to you. He’s wearing a sleeveless black top, the fabric stretching across his chest and showing off the ink drawn over his skin. One of his arms is completely bare of any tattoos, but his other is a beautiful canvas of pieces he’s collected over the years𑁋some intricate fineline, others that are more bold and striking. He even has some dotted over his ribs as well, particularly the Gemini tattoo that you love kissing.

He reaches out instinctively, sliding his arms around your waist to pull you closer to him. Your head falls onto his chest naturally, breathing him in, giving him the opportunity to press a kiss to the top of your head. You can feel his steady heartbeat against your cheek, and it helps to lessen your nerves a little.

After all, it’s temporary pain for something permanent on your skin forever. And of course, it’s created by the man you love. 

“Alright,” he murmurs, pulling back to look at you properly. “Let’s get you ready then, love. Can I take this off you?”

His fingers linger underneath your (his) shirt, tracing circles on your back as if he’s drawing it out on you. It sends shivers of anticipation up and down your spine. He’s giving you one last chance to change your mind, but you both already know you won’t.

You tilt your head to look at him back. “Yes. Please.”

You swear you see his eyes darken for a split second at your words. Without another word, he leads you to the mirror perched in the corner, turns your back to him, and peels the oversized shirt off slow enough it almost seems like he’s purposely teasing you. You help by lifting your arms as it slips off you, leaving you bare from the waist up. You’re not even wearing a bra underneath, and you hear him suck in a sharp breath.

For a second, he just… stares at you in the mirror, lips pursing at the way your nipples tighten in the cool air. Then he drinks in the sight of your bare back𑁋his beautiful untouched canvas𑁋taking in how the dim lighting in the room highlights the line of your spine and the elegant curve of your shoulders. The thought that he’s about to leave something permanent there visibly makes him swallow. 

“Jesus Christ,” he mutters, mostly to himself. “How am I supposed to concentrate for the next six hours when you look like this?”

“Like what?” You ask amusedly, meeting his heated gaze in the mirror.

“Like a goddess,” he finishes roughly, letting a hand hover near your waist, close but not exactly touching you, as if he’s scared to ruin you with carelessness. “A masterpiece I shouldn’t be allowed to worship.”

Heat blooms through your face at that. You grab his hand that’s lingering over your side, guiding it to where he’s finally touching you properly. His palm is slightly cold at first, but it warms instantly the second he’s touches your skin. His other hand joins in, sliding up your ribs until both palms rest just beneath your breasts, thumbs tenderly brushing the undersides. Then he leans in to kiss a line down from your nape, nipping gently on where your neck meets your shoulder. 

He smiles against your skin when he feels you tremble in his hold.

“I love it when you worship me,” You tell him quietly.

Immediately, you swear you see the way your words make his mind flash𑁋perhaps with images of past intimate nights with your bodies tangled in bed together, his mouth between your thighs for hours, marking his territory on top of his own art. He also imagines how you’d look from behind when he sinks inside𑁋

“On the chair now,” he orders, forcing himself backward. “before I lose my mind.”

With a breathless giggle, you sit down on the client chair, straddling it so that your chest is pinned against the leather backrest. The position leaves your entire back deliciously exposed to him. You hear the sound of gloves being snapped on and the roll of his stool wheeling right next to you. Even though you can’t see him, you still feel the heat of his eyes roaming over you.

The next few minutes are spent cleaning you. Joshua’s gloved hands move slowly as he wipes your entire back down with antiseptic solution, his thumbs applying some reassuring pressure along your spine. You shiver when it hits your skin, and he notices immediately. 

“You’re shaking,” he murmurs. “Still okay?”

“Mhm,” You breathe, eyes half-closed. “Just… sensitive.”

He hums in understanding, then leans in to place a soft kiss to your shoulder blade.

Once your skin is clean, he carefully applies the stencil. He smooths it down your skin inch by inch with both hands from the nape of your neck all the way to the curve just above your ass. You can already imagine every detail of it𑁋the long, coiling scaly body of the dragon, along with the delicate cherry blossom branches that will soften it. 

When the stencil is peeled away, both the room and Joshua take a collective deep breath together. 

The dragon already looks beautifully alive on your skin. Its serpentine body twists down the length of your spine, the tail end just above the waistband of your lounge shorts. Cherry blossom petals and branches burst along its scales, a few petals seemingly drifting free like a small breeze across your skin. The lines are fine, crisp, perfect. Even Joshua himself seems completely speechless of the linework that he created. 

There’s really nobody else that you trust more than him to do this. 

“Wow,” he utters out softly, refusing to blink for a few seconds as if he’s scared you’ll vanish. “You look… illegal, baby.”

A choked laugh leaves you, reality settling within your bones that you’re seriously doing this. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” He caresses a gloved finger down your back right beside the stencil. “You’re really going to sit through this, huh?”

“You’re really going to make me sit through it.”

“Fair,” he quips with a grin, before exhaling a breath through his nose. “But if it gets too much or becomes too painful, you tell me immediately, okay? We’re only doing the outline for today, then shading later another time.”

You glance at him over your shoulder, wiggling a brow at him. “Bossy.”

“I’m serious,” Joshua says pointedly, yet there’s a layer of softness underneath. “This is your body, love.”

That lands more harder than it should.

Your smile fades and brightens at the same time. “And I trust you with it, Shua. I always have.” 

Joshua pauses from where he’s been squeezing out the black ink into some tiny plastic caps. For a moment, you see the professional artist facade on his face crack and sparkle of love in his eyes. Because after all, he is your boyfriend𑁋the man who kisses your forehead when you’re sick and the one who’s about to carve forever on your skin with hands that’s thoroughly mapped every inch of you. 

He rolls his stool until he’s right in front of you. Without any hesitation, he leans in to steal a slow, deep kiss to your lips, leaning his forehead against yours for a minute. 

“Then let me make this perfect for you, my brave girl,” he whispers assuringly, rolling himself back beside you. The sound of the machine buzzing to life cuts through the rain shower outside and the low tunes of his playlist. “Colour system, alright? I’ll work my way from the top to the bottom.” 

You nod, gripping the top of the client chair a little tighter as the familiar buzz of the tattoo machine fills the room. After getting multiple pieces done already, you find the sound oddly comforting now, especially if it’s with Joshua. 

When the needle touches down at the nape of your neck, your lips tighten together into a thin line and you have to force yourself not to flinch. You feel the vibrations of the machine carry into your skull as Joshua starts to outline the head of the dragon, keeping one hand settled at the small of your back anytime the needle starts dragging to more sensitive flesh. 

Each precise pass sends little sparks of fire down your nerves, some of them curling low in your belly in a way that feels way inappropriate given the situation. As the long minutes drag by, you close your eyes and rest your forehead onto the cool leather backrest. Every so often Joshua lifts the machine to wipe away any excess ink and blood, and to plant soothing kisses beside the fresh ink as if to apologise for the pain and praise you for your strength at the same time. It’s strangely intimate𑁋letting him mark you like this, claim you like this. 

Minutes slowly blur to an hour. The silence is filled mostly with Joshua updating you with the progress so far and checking in on you, the occasional sigh of discomfort from your lips when the needle hits a particularly sensitive spot on your spine, and his playlist now shifting to some smooth jazz (Sade, mostly). By the time the second hour hits, Joshua kills the machine for a short break, which gives you the opportunity to finally stretch from being stuck in the chair for so long.

“The head and neck are done,” he tells you, ditching the gloves and offering you some water. “How are you feeling?”

You extend your arms up to the ceiling, groaning at the sensitivity in your muscles. 

“Stiff,” You admit hoarsely, rolling your shoulders carefully. “Burns like hell near my spine. But… I’m okay. I want to keep going.” 

Joshua watches you with soft, attentive eyes as you take the glass of water from him. The sleeveless top he’s wearing clings to his frame from the warmth of the room. His gaze drifts down your bare torso and the redness of your skin from where the needle had been, lingering on the way your breasts move as you stretch, before flicking back up to your face. 

His sweatpants are beginning to feel uncomfortably tight too, but he tries to ignore the feeling with an audible cough out of his throat. The professionalism is hanging on by a thread at this point. Because you’re still technically his ‘client’, despite the fact that you both sleep in the same bed together every day and he knows your mind and body by heart. 

But you’re also his girlfriend… who is completely topless in front of him. So his thoughts are basically bound to go haywire. 

“Alright, try to relax for me again, baby,” Joshua instructs, snapping on a fresh pair of gloves. He leans over you, close enough that the warmth of his body hits your skin, and presses a hand between your shoulder blades to guide you back into position. “You’re doing so good for me, you know that?”

The machine buzzes back to life, and the needle meets your skin once more with that delicious burn, causing an unconscious whimper to tumble out of you. The dragon’s body is thicker towards the middle of your back, but Joshua works his way down with steady and careful strokes, ink blooming beneath your skin like ribbons.

But you can sense the shift in him. 

His breathing grows heavier with every involuntary sound you let out from the pain or how your back arches beautifully when a raw area is drawn over, brows furrowed together as he works in concentration, even if it’s fraying by each minute that passes. 

When he finally reaches the tail-end of the dragon𑁋just above the waistband of your shorts and the swell of your ass𑁋the needle drags across the sensitive skin of your lower back, sending sharp sparks straight down your spine and between your legs. You can’t stop the soft, needy moan that escapes you this time. 

“Colour?” Joshua asks, wiping away the excess ink. 

A shaky breath leaves you, trying to steady yourself even if your body feels like it’s been set ablaze in the best and worst ways. 

“Green… mostly,” You mutter in response. “It’s a lot on the lower back, but I can take it.”

Joshua hums in acknowledgement, offering a reassuring squeeze to your hip. You feel him shift on the stool beside you, his gloved hand roaming down your lower back and stopping just shy of the waistband of your shorts. One of his fingers slides underneath from behind to trace the sensitive skin there teasingly. 

His warm breath fans against you, a smug smirk on his face that you can’t see but can definitely sense. “I can tell you’re wet for me, love.” 

Heat instantly floods your cheeks, embarrassment crawling up your spine. “Shua…”

“Dirty girl,” he says with a low chuckle, the corners of his mouth twitching upwards. “Getting turned on by me marking up your back, hm?”

You bite at your bottom lip hard in embarrassment, both mortified and aroused at the same time. The bastard knows you too well. 

“I can’t help it,” You mumble shyly, refusing to look at him. “It feels good… especially with your hands on me.” 

Joshua gives a playful snap to his gloves, causing you to flinch in the seat out of pure anticipation. God, it kills him to see how needy you are for him right now𑁋but he has a job to finish and he’s determined to do so. He’s blessed at being able to keep his patience afloat, most times to tease you more than anything; otherwise, he would have you bent over the chair right now. 

“I still have the lower back to finish,” he reminds you, reluctantly pulling his hand away from you. “Think you can behave long enough for me to do it?” 

You nod your head, even as you grind subtly into the chair for that small ounce of friction. You say yes, but you both know that’s a lie. 

The machine whirs back to life instantly. When the sharp stick of the needle meets the sensitive skin of your lower back, your whole body reacts. The skin there is tender and sensitive after the long hours of being worked over. And the second Joshua drags another line across your lower back, your hips twitch up involuntarily as you fight to stay still. If today is only for the outline, you could only imagine how the shading process would be like. 

“Breathe for me, love,” Joshua coos lightly, pausing for a minute. He flattens a hand to the curve of your waist to hold you down and rub circles on your skin. “Lower back is evil, I know. Just a little more.”

Easy for him to say.

You feel the vibrations of the machine travel straight through your pelvis. Your grip tightens around the leather backrest, breasts pressed flush against the chair as you try to breathe through the stinging fire licking up your spine. 

“So pretty like this,” he praises absentmindedly as he draws out the cherry blossom petals. “Taking it so well for me, sweetheart…”

You can’t tell if the praise makes it better or worse. Worse, probably𑁋it sinks hotter into your skin than the needle does. You’re probably soaked as well. Embarrassingly so, since his hands have been on you the entire time, and the words that come out are in that familiar adoring tone he only uses in the bedroom with you. You’re not sure if what you’re feeling is pain or need anymore. 

Joshua knows it too. His low chuckle vibrates through the quiet room as he continues the final outlines on the cherry blossoms right where the tail curls. 

After what feels like a literal eternity, the machine is finally killed off for the last time, and the room falls into a strange kind of silence with the exception of your ridiculously heavy breathing. The relief is immediate when the needle is away from your burning skin, but the desperate ache between your thighs continues to throb. You near the loud snap of Joshua removing his latex gloves and rolling his stool back to retrieve the aftercare supplies.

Joshua takes his precious time wiping away what remains of the excess ink over your inflamed skin. After everything is pat dry, he applies a final layer of soothing ointment, before slowly rolling on the second skin, pressing it down with careful palms from the nape of your neck all the way to the curve of your lower back. The cool, transparent film material settles protectively over the fresh dragon and cherry blossoms, sealing them in. 

The moment he’s done, you hear him lean back on the stool, just staring at you𑁋and his work𑁋for a long minute. You lift your head to glance at him over your shoulder.

He looks completely wrecked. There’s some exhaustion there obviously, fatigue sitting directly beneath his eyes from all the long hours of concentration. But the heat in his gaze is unmistakable. 

“Are you gonna say something or just stare at me forever?” You ask him with a sly look. 

Joshua blinks as if you pulled him out of a trance. 

“God, come here, love,” he urges, and before you can respond, he’s pulling you by the arms and leading you towards the large mirror in the corner of the room. 

He positions you right in front of the mirror, standing behind you with his hands resting on your hips. The fairy lights cast a warm glow across your skin, almost making the second skin on your back shimmer faintly. 

“Look,” Joshua whispers hotly, spinning you gently so your back is visible in the reflection. “Look at what we made together.”

Your breath catches in your throat when you catch sight of the tattoo for the very first time. The dragon coils elegantly down your spine as if it had always belonged there. Cherry blossom branches and petals drift along its body like they’re caught in a permanent spring breeze. The head rests between your shoulder blades while the tail disappears low near the waistband of your shorts. It looks almost alive. 

“Shua…” You breathe, unable to find the proper words from how stunned you are as you peer back up at him. “It’s beautiful.”

Joshua nuzzles his nose into your hair, inhaling you in, before tilting his head slightly so that his mouth barely grazes your neck. 

“Yeah?” he murmurs, gliding his hands up your sides, stopping short of your breasts. “It’s more than beautiful, love. It’s perfect on you.” 

A kiss to your neck severs any kind of response you could say, stealing the words right off your tongue and replacing it with a soft, trembling breath. Joshua smiles against your skin, pulling more shaky sighs out of you as he kisses his way down to your collarbone. 

When he pulls away, your eyes lock together. In the small space between your bodies, you can feel the hours of lingering tension, pain, pride, and need. Joshua’s gaze is dark, full of love and unbridled hunger. You only have to flick your attention down to his lips once before he’s on you. 

Joshua’s mouth crashes onto yours, fueled by the desperation that’s been simmering for the past few hours. His tongue slides against yours like he’s trying to taste every sound of discomfort and pleasure that left you. You moan softly into his mouth as your hands tangle up in his dark hair, his arms sliding around you to pull you closer but ensuring to not put any pressure on your freshly tattooed back. You can feel how hard he is through his sweatpants. 

“Careful, beautiful,” he breathes against your lips, even as he walks you backward until the backs of your knees collide with the client chair. “It’s still fresh. I’m not ruining my best work because I can’t keep my hands off you.” 

But the way he’s kissing you says otherwise. And the way his fingers wander underneath your shorts to cup your clothed pussy says otherwise, too. 

“I need you, Shua,” You mutter breathlessly, hands sliding underneath his sleeveless top as you feel his fingers glide through your soaked folds. “Please… want you inside me.”

Joshua groans at your pleads, exhaling harshly through his nose.

“God, how can I ever deny you?” he rasps darkly, guiding you around so that your chest is braced up against the side of the chair. “Keep that pretty back arched for me, baby.” 

You obey instantly, folding forward and resting your forearms on the seat. The position leaves you shamelessly exposed for him, your back arching beautifully so that he has the perfect sight of the dragon tattoo from behind.

Joshua’s breath catches. “Fuck, just like that…”

You hear the rustle of fabric as he finally pushes his sweatpants and boxers down his thighs. Then you feel him drag down your lounge shorts in one smooth motion, letting them pool at your ankles. He steps up behind you, one hand smoothing up the back of your thigh while the other kneads at the soft flesh of your hip, thumb brushing just beneath the edge of the second skin. 

He leans in to plant open-mouthed over the untouched skin of your back, his hardened cock nudging teasingly at your entrance. The heat of his breath ghosts across your spine as he drags his lips slowly upward.

“Still okay?” he whispers, voice rough yet still tainted with that familiar tenderness that makes your chest ache. “Tell me if anything hurts, love.”

You subtly grind yourself back against him, aching for more. He grips your hips even more tightly at the contact.

“I’m okay,” You reassure him, voice trembling with need. “Want all of you, Shua… please.”

Joshua presses one more lingering, grateful kiss to the centre of your upper back right beside the dragon’s head as if to silently say thank you, before slowly pushing the thick head of his cock inside your soaked entrance. The two of you moan softly at the familiarity of your bodies joining together. His bare chest leans protectively over your body, close enough that you feel the steady thrum of his heartbeat against your back. 

He slowly enters you inch by inch, letting you feel every ridge and vein inside until his hips are flush against your ass. A shared, breathy moans from the two of you travels through the quiet apartment. He stays still for a long moment, just to savour the feeling of being perfectly connected with you and to let you adjust. One of his arms wraps gently around your waist to rest a warm palm over your stomach as he continues to worship attention to every inch of skin he can reach with his mouth. 

Then he starts to move𑁋unhurried deep thrusts that drags his cock alongside your sensitive walls. His hand on your stomach lowers until they’re between your legs, fingers seeking your clit and running through your wetness to bring that added pleasure. You push back against him, desperate for more, but he keeps the pace torturously steady.

“Take it easy, sweetheart,” Joshua murmurs against the shell of your ear. “Don’t move too much. Let me take care of you.”

His free hand tantalisingly traces the edge of the second skin. The sight of his art on your spine while he fucks you spurs him on even further. With a guttural groan, he starts to pick up the pace, still mindful of your back but unable to hold himself back completely. The wet sounds of your bodies mixes in with your broken whimpers, each thrust sending thrilling flames of pain and pleasure down your body.

You grip the leather chair even tighter, your back arching deeper instinctively. “Shua𑁋right there𑁋fuck𑁋”

Joshua curses under his breath. He angles his hips slightly to kiss that particular spot that makes your vision blur, his fingers moving on your clit even faster.

“That’s it,” he praises thickly in that low, filthy register you love, giving an encouraging squeeze to your ass. “Let me hear you, love. You took my needle so fucking well… and now you’re taking my cock just as pretty. Been thinking about this every single minute I was marking you.” 

His words make you clench tightly around him, drawing a deep groan out of his chest. His hips begin to snap harder into you, causing your head to helplessly fall onto the cool leather of the chair as he continues fucking you from behind. Every thrust sends your breasts crushing harder into the chair, nipples aching from the friction. 

You’re so embarrassingly close already from the hours of teasing, the needle’s sting, and his cock driving in and out of you at a relentless rhythm. 

“My perfect canvas… my masterpiece…” he murmurs possessively against your skin, sending another rush of heat through you. “All mine to mark, to worship, and fuck.” 

When your legs start to shake, Joshua notices it immediately, responding by rubbing more tighter circles on your clit, exactly how you like it. His own rhythm starts to falter as he feels himself nearing the edge as well, but he doesn’t dare slow down. He wants𑁋no, craves𑁋to see you fall apart while his art is still fresh on your back. 

“Shua𑁋shit𑁋I’m close, so close𑁋” You pant hoarsely, feeling the coil in your stomach wind tighter and tighter. 

“Yeah?” he asks, teeth grazing over your shoulder. “Cum on my cock, baby. You’re squeezing me so good𑁋come on, sweetheart𑁋”

That’s all it takes.

Your orgasm crashes into your hard, a broken sob of his name tearing out of your throat as your walls pulse around him. The pleasure and fiery pain ripping through your body only heightens your release even stronger. Joshua’s hips stutter against you, his fingers working through you to draw every last sigh until you’re sensitive and gasping. 

When the last hints of your orgasm fades, he finally lets himself go as well, burying himself deep inside of you with a short-winded grunt. His forehead drops onto the slick skin of your shoulder, his chest rising and falling heavily against you. 

Neither of you move for a while, only listening to one another’s ragged breathing as you both come down from your intense releases together. Joshua reaches down to intertwine his hand with yours that’s been gripping the chair so tautly. 

“You okay?” he asks breathlessly while caressing a tender finger over your hip bone with his free hand. “Does anything hurt?”

You let out a shaky, yet contented chuckle. “Everything burns a little, but… it’s good. Really good.” You give a reassuring squeeze to his hand. “Mmmh… you’re insatiable.”

Joshua hums in relief. “You’re the insatiable one, my love. Have you seen yourself? And we still have to do the shading𑁋how am I supposed to hold myself back for that?”

Your cheeks flare up at his words, causing you to smack him playfully on the rear, but he retaliates with a tender kiss to the side of your neck. Then he cautiously pulls out of you, the two of you hissing at the sensitivity. He helps you straighten up before spinning you around to give you a proper kiss on the lips, bringing that shy giggle out of you that he adores so much when he draws back.

He angles your body slightly to check the second skin on your back, making sure it’s secure.

“Everything looks good,” he says, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “It’s going to heal so beautifully on you. I’ll make sure of it.”

You grin up at him with hazy eyes. “I know you will.”

As he helps you back into your shirt and puts on his own clothes, he leads you to your shared bedroom. Now that the healing process has started, he knows he can’t wait to see how it’ll look entirely completed in its beauty𑁋when he can run his fingertips over it without worry, and maybe, just maybe, when he can pin you down into the sheets and worship his work on you once again. 

Because you still have to get through the shading sessions.

And he plans to make each one unforgettable.

perm taglist (open) ʚɞ

@sn4psh00t @slytherinshua @seungkw1 @etherealyoungk @bananabubble

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*Twenty-four years ago*

“Yoon Jeonghan!” His mother’s voice boomed through the small home, your full name quickly following, but it was fruitless. The two of you were already running out the door, giggling, both of you with handfuls of the cookies that his mother had spent hours making.

“This way,” you tell him, and the seven-year-old boy nodded, following you without any further questions. Just like you did him.

Pushing aside a broken board in a fence, you and him slipped through into an abandoned looking backyard. On the other end of the yard, there was an old wooden shed and exactly where you were leading him. The once fresh and crisp wood now weathered from age and the elements; the door barely held onto its hinges, and a window that had several cracks in it.

Your hidden oasis. Yours and Jeonghan's little hide out.

Inside the old building, cobwebs covered corners of the walls. There was an old lawnmower that was rusted and abandoned to time and a built-in table to one side that was already filled with other snacks and drinks you both swiped from each other’s home. There were also two small sleeping bags laid out to be able to sit on the ground without getting your bottoms dirty.

“I can’t believe she fell for that,” Jeonghan giggled, setting his share of the cookies onto a broken plastic plate, one your grandmother threw away and you dug out of the trash to use in your ‘hide out’.

“I told you, she would. She’s like my grandma when she is baking.” You tell him with ease. Your seven-year-old confidence was admirable, your share joining his on the plate, except for one that you were going to eat. Taking a bite of the soft warm cookie, you continued to talk with your mouth full, “It was all a matter of striking at the right moment. You know this, Hanni.”

“She is going to be so mad at me when I get home,” He chuckled, his own mouth now full of cookies. You roll your eyes, reaching up from your place on the ground to grab two juice boxes, because you knew Jeonghan’s mom wasn’t going to be that mad. Not like your grandma would be at least. “She will be!”

“She never stays mad at you,” You quipped, dropping your cookie to cross your arms, a pout already forming. “You hardly ever get in trouble.”

“That’s not true!” Jeonghan shot back, copying you exactly, but stuck his tongue out in the process. “You don’t know how often I get in trouble. Especially because of you!”

“I don’t tell you to join in! I suggest!” You could feel your body growing hot with annoyance, dropping your arms with your fists now clenched. “You are the one who gets me in trouble all the time!”

“Yes, you do! You pulled my hair the last time I didn’t go with one of your plans!” Jeonghan snapped, and you gasped like he had just insulted your entire doll collection. Then you hit his arm, and his face darkened. “See! You hit me if I don’t agree with you!”

“You pushed me in the mud the last time I disagreed with you!” You countered, your young voices rising as you both did, getting into each other’s faces. “And I was grounded for a week after that too! I couldn’t watch TV because of you!”

Somehow this turned into a little squabble, where you and Jeonghan grabbed each other. Your hand was in his short dark hair, while he was trying to swat you off, crying out to let him go. In the middle of it, one of your feet kicked the plate that held your stolen cookies, breaking the plastic further and the baked treats were now being trampled by your feet.

“Look what you did!” Jeonghan yelled,  pointing to the cookies when he finally was able to get your hand out of his hair while you stood there. Your face contorted into anger, and more offense that he would blame you when he was being the mean one.

“I didn’t just do that! You did too!” You retorted, and the young boy rolled his eyes. “Our cookies are ruined! And so is our little spot! You need to clean that up!”

“No, you!”

“You!”

In the end, the two of you ended up sitting on opposite ends of the sleeping bags. Arms crossed, backs facing each other, while the broken cookies and plate rested between you both. The silence was loud as you both refused to be the one to speak first, both of you too stubborn to break first.

In the end it was Jeonghan who broke the silence, standing to grab another juice box for you both and a packet of candies that you liked from the table. A peace offering in a way. You shot him a look, your eyes dropping to the candies and juice box before up to his face. His gaze was softer, with an apologetic expression on his face.

“Sorry,” He mumbled, and you tried to keep up being mad, but the way his bottom lip jutted out as he apologized made it hard. Instead, you reached out and took the offerings, and he sat down next to you.

“Sorry too...” You mumbled, sharing the candies with him before cleaning up the broken plate and ruined cookies.

*Thirteen years ago*

“Oh my god, Jeonghan, stop hogging the joint!” You whined, reaching for the rolled up paper that had your weed in it, but Jeonghan seemed to be trying to smoke it all to himself.

“Give me. Remember its puff puff give. I only did one puff.” He retorted, holding the joint just out of your reach so you were practically falling into the eighteen-year-old boy.

“Bullshit! That was more than one; hell it was more than two! It was like three!” You argued back, your arm still outstretched to grab the joint from him, “Yoon Jeonghan, if you don’t give me that joint now, I am beating your bitch ass up.”

“Please like you can take me,” Jeonghan laughed, attempting to put the burning joint back to his lips, his other arm trying to push you back while you fought to grab it from him.

You both were back at the shed again, the same old structure still holding out even after all these years, but things were different. The old lawnmower was now gone and sitting next to the it, collecting more rust and cobwebs in its new home, the webs in the corners no longer there, and the sleeping bags had changed to an old loveseat that one of your friends found. The juice boxes and snacks that were once on the table were replaced with a pizza box, a half empty bottle of Jeonghan’s dad stolen whiskey, a baggy of cheap weed, and some rolling papers.

And the two seven-year-olds who would hide away in it with stolen snacks, or other things to entertain were now eighteen. Freshly graduated from high school, stuck in that limbo stage where you both weren’t quite adults but not quite children anymore, and preparing for the next steps in your life. You were going off to a school abroad while Jeonghan was staying back in your hometown, choosing to go to a local college first.

“God, you’re so annoying,” You pouted, practically pushing him back and sitting on his stomach to grab the joint, but laughter was filtering out of you before you could stop it. Bringing laughter from the pinned man below you, a lazy smirk played over his lips like he was meant to win this no matter what. “Jeonghan, you’re going to smoke it all!”

“Then I will buy you more!” He argued, and you slapped his chest. Grabbing your wrist before you could hit him again, Jeonghan’s grip held you there as he lifted the joint to your lips. Like instinct, you took a deep inhale, letting the harsh herb fill your lungs and altering your non-sober state more. You try to free yourself from him, so you can smoke it how you wanted, but he wouldn’t let you.

Pulling back finally, you blew the smoke from your lungs into the air, and it was then that Jeonghan let you go, only to be smacked in the chest once more before you slipped off him and back to your seat next to him. Your leg tucked under you, your bare skin pressing into the old wood by your weight, but you ignored any possible splinters that may come from it.

“You suck, you know that?” You tell him, and this earned another chuckle from him.

“And you blow. We’re both whores here.” Jeonghan teased, placing the joint between his lips to rest his arms behind his head. Each breath inhaled the smoke from nearly finished joint into his lungs. His long dark hair pulled back into a ponytail, but there were several strands that fell loose around his face.

His old Sublime shirt torn in a different place and showed off his stomach from the way he was laying, skinny jeans, and a gold chain with angel wings that was once yours laying against his throat. Skin glowing from the setting sun and the lantern behind you both, making him look ethereal.

You envied how beautiful your best friend was.

“Give me that,” You quipped, taking the chance to swipe the joint from him. A triumphant smile was playing over your lips before you realized that it was nearly gone. “You asshole, you smoked most of this.”

“And you drank most of my whiskey. Call us even.” He answered dismissively, closing his eyes briefly.

“Whatever,” you told him, taking whatever hit you can of the joint before putting it out, smashing it hard against the wood. Silence followed, the two of you sitting at the doorway of the shed, your eyes scanning the overgrown yard and the half burnt down house just feet from you.

It’d been like that for years, with no one coming to do anything about the destroyed home or the property it stood on, making it a haven for you and Jeonghan growing up, and a place of many things. Your first kiss with a boy that smelled like he used a whole can of body spray to cover that he hadn’t bathed, Jeonghan’s first kiss with a girl who tried to fight you over him.

You spent nights in the shed to avoid your grandparents and their old fashion but offensive words, many with Jeonghan right next to you. Refusing to leave you while you refused to crash at his place, because you knew his mom would call your grandparents. You got high and drunk for the first time with him next to you, and blasted music through a shitty speaker that neither of you could explain the origin of.

Hell, you two used it as a place to hide once when you had the cops called on you for stealing. You don’t think either of you had ever been so scared thinking you were caught, but it didn’t stop you because the thrill left you both laughing until your stomach hurts.

You laughed, cried, and felt every emotion you could think of in this shed, with Jeonghan beside you. In a week's time, you will be on a plane to a new country with a family friend willing to house you during your studies, and away from your home. Away from your life, away from the little shed. Away from the comforting blanket of your hometown.

Away from Jeonghan.

“You’re thinking too loud again,” His voice pulled you from your thoughts, turning your gaze toward your best friend. He was still laying back; arms folded behind his head as a pillow and prop, with his eyes on you. A small sad smile played on his lips, because he knew what you were thinking about too. “Talk to me, bug.”

"You're a bug. I should squish you," You answer back, matching his smile as you watched him let our a breathy laugh.

“I would like to see you try. You couldn’t even get the joint from me.” He then lifts his leg to nudge you with his knee. “Now, talk to me.”

“It’s stupid.”

“I mean, yeah your face is, but it’s at least pretty while being it.” He offered and you slapped his knee. He then sat up, giving you the famous lazy Jeonghan smirk you grew up seeing, but you could tell it was only a front.

“Just… growing up.” You told him, gesturing between the two of you, “We’re no longer kids anymore…”

“Debatable.” He murmured while you spoke.

“…we graduated high school and are preparing to be thrusted into the real world. We’re having to finally grow up and face life. I’m…” The words failed you then, and in its place was a soft choking sound. A sob that wanted to burst through, but you managed to swallow it back while blinking the sudden tears that wanted to fall. Jeonghan could see it all as he nodded. “I’m leaving… leaving everything I know…” This time your voice cracked, “Leaving you.”

“Please, the moment you agreed to marry me on the playground at five you were stuck with me.” Jeonghan answered, doing what he did best, trying to make light of something instead of showing what he’s really feeling. And you hated that it would work more times than it didn’t. “Just… there is going to be some distance between us. It’s not like I’m not a phone call or message away, and we’ll see each other again. This isn’t a final thing.”

“It feels like it is.” This comment made him tsk at you.

“It doesn’t to me.” He shook his head, watching through broken windows as a car passed by. The driver wouldn’t even know you were sharing one of the last times together before life took hold of you. One of the last times you would be free like this, this age, in the moment, and with the only person, besides your grandparents, who stuck by your side.

Someone you grew up with, someone you got into trouble with, someone who never was fake with you. Someone you saw every day and spent most of it with. Your best friend.

“It doesn’t?”

“Of course not. How could it be when we are still so young?” He asked simply and you could only listen to him, “It’s also not like you are leaving for good. Your grandparents are still here; your friends are here… I am here.”

“But what if our lives don’t allow room for each other anymore?” This earned another tsk, as well as an offending sounding laugh. Hurt flashed across his eyes before he looked away, like it was preposterous to even say something like that.

“I don’t know about you, but I’ll always have room for you in my life.” He said curtly, and you dropped your shoulders while making an over exasperated sigh. That wasn’t what you meant.

“Ugh, Hanni, I don’t mean it like that.” He turns his attention back to you, before flashing it toward the whiskey bottle. “I mean... what if even when I come home… we don’t have time for each other? We don’t get to see each other. You’re going to be working, going to school, and eventually you’re going to fall in love and have a partner. Same for me too.”

“I’m not sure how that sounds any different than your previous statement,” Jeonghan mumbled this, pushing his lip out in a pout. Reaching out, he caught a tear falling with his thumb, only to yank his hand away and shake it like he touched lava. This did what he wanted it to, which was to laugh.

“Hanni…”

“It’s okay. I forgive you for hurting my feelings. This is a hard time for us both,” There was so much honesty to his words, it was also written all over his face. He was trying to not think about the inevitable, which was you were leaving. Not the forever he had declared, but it was still hard. “It’s not just you losing something, I’m losing my best friend. My partner in crime. Who am I going to get into mischief with? Joshua?”

“I mean… at least he’ll keep you from getting arrested.”

“If he’s not too busy fucking anything that will let him.” Jeonghan rolled his eyes, “But I’m serious. You’re not the only one who loses something in this. Except I’m not accepting that this is it, because it’s not.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Of course I do, I’m Yoon fucking Jeonghan. I can bend the will of others with a flick of my wrist, and this will bend to my will.” You still don’t look convinced, and he clicks his tongue before speaking again, “How about this? If life takes us on different paths that separate us further, then the year we turn thirty-one, we meet again. You and me… and any husbands, wives, fiancés, life partners or children we may have. Somewhere nice, somewhere where our busy lives can’t touch us. Where we can catch up, and remember that it’s always been us, and it will always be us.”

“Really?”

“Yes, now ask me what will happen if life doesn’t do that.” He smirks, and you giggle.

“What will happen if life doesn’t?”

“Then we do it still!” He announced throwing his arms up, before one found its way over your shoulder. “No matter what, no matter where life takes us, we meet the year we turn thirty-one.”

“Why thirty-one though?”

“Because it’s too cliché to meet when we turn thirty. Goodness, this isn’t one of those romance movies you make me watch.” He gave you a brief squeeze before getting up to grab the whiskey bottle. “So, what you say?”

“I can easily argue that the last three romances we watched was because of you, not me.” Jeonghan sat back down next to you, the bottle in his hand, but it remained unopen. His attention was on you, his eyes watching you as you try to find the words. Every part of him told you that he was serious about this, and it helped ease an ache that was building in you. “And let’s do it.”

“Perfect. Now let’s drink to the future.”

A week later, you were clinging to him at the airport as your grandfather got your luggage together. This time tears weren’t holding back, Jeonghan wasn’t able to say anything to help because he was busy fighting his own. Instead, he just held you as you gripped at the offensive SpongeBob shirt he was wearing, soaking it with not just your tears, but the mascara and eyeliner you had thickly drawn on. Only to have it cried away telling your best friend goodbye for now.

“Hey,” Jeonghan’s voice was soft when he pulled back, making you look at him. His eyes were shining, and red. Evidence that he’d been crying, though you knew he’d insist he’s actually high, and it nearly broke you. “Remember what I said. The year we turn thirty-one.”

You nodded, and he gives you a soft smile.

“I’ll send you the details, so make sure you have the entire year free.” He teased and you let out a soft laugh before jumping from him, pinching you. You break away from his grasp to hit his shoulder. This earned a soft laugh from you, your eyes dropping to the angel wing necklace that still rested around his neck.

“I’ll be sure to have all my information changed by then.” You laughed, and he pinched your side again. Your name then came from behind you both, your grandparents calling to you. It was time to go. Looking back at Jeonghan, you gave him a watery smile, “I’m going to miss you.”

“I’m going to miss you too,” This was the first time his voice finally cracked, and a tear started to fall. It was real. It was happening.

“I’ll text you when I land.”

“You better.” He teased. “I will see you again.”

“See you again.”

**A year ago**

Your phone chimed right as you were cooking dinner, cutting off the music playing briefly, but you weren’t able to stop what you were doing to look. Too focused on making sure that you didn’t burn anything, but the couple that was in the kitchen with you noticed.

“Need me to check that?” You heard Celeste ask, and you looked over your shoulder, to her and Soonyoung grabbing the plates and cutlery for the table.

“No, it’s okay. I can check it later,” You waved her off, “Dinners ready, and we have a proposal to go over.”

“I thought there was no work talk at dinner?” Soonyoung teased, making you shoot your friend and co-owner a look, only to earn a playful wink back. He then turned to his fiancé with a smile, “If we’re working while we eat, you might as well open two bottles. One for us and one just for her.”

“Watch it Kwon, or I’ll run this company with Celeste instead” You warned him, grateful that Celeste was already stepping in to grab his collar to drag him out of the kitchen with everything to arrange at the table.

Twenty minutes later, the three of you were sitting around the table, two wine bottles open with one in front of you and one between the couple. You all were talking animatedly about the proposal that you and Soonyoung were putting together, hoping that the potential investor takes on your ideas and help launch your small business globally. Soonyoung had been right to have your own bottle open; it helped ease the tension that was building in your shoulders over all this, and there were more laughs than not.

“I think we should add some tiger imagery to the presentation; you think we can do that?” Soonyoung suggested a wine glass coming up to his lips, only for it to be stopped by his fiancé. He looks at her with confusion as she only shook her head. Celeste supported his love for tigers, but even she knew when to draw the line.

“I should hire you as our creative director,” You joked, tipping your own wine glass in her direction. “You can save me from a lot of tiger themed merchandise and advertising.”

“I love you, but if I took that, I probably would be canceling the wedding instead of planning a honeymoon,” Celeste laughed, and Soonyoung looked offended. “Oh, don’t look at me like that, I know how you are when you’re working. We met at work, remember?”

“Of course, I do. I barely was able to focus at meetings because all I wanted to do was look at you,” You actively rolled your eyes as the couple stared at each other like they hung the sun and the moon for each other, and it reminded you just how single you have been for the last few years. Happily single, but not when you were around these two being so sickeningly in love.

“Gag me.” You muttered making the two look at you. Celeste playfully stuck her tongue at you, and Soonyoung pretended to growl. That was when you knew that you had lost them both to being lovey toward each other. You took this chance to check your phone, remembering it had gone off while you were cooking.

It was a message. From Jeonghan.

Your eyes widened as your fingers tightened around the stem of your glass, or you were going to drop it onto the table and spill wine all over the place. Casting your eyes up, you were relieved to see your two friends were still too busy staring at each other to notice your reaction.

You and him hadn’t really spoken in nearly six years, not since you came home for your grandfather’s funeral. Of course, you would wish each other a happy birthday, send the occasional meme, or a quick hello, but other than that, you barely spoke. You didn’t want to admit that it was hard for you to respond because it made you want to go back to being that eighteen-year-old again.

But you knew what this was about. You had turned thirty recently, and his thirtieth was a few months away, which meant that the promise the two of you had made at eighteen, smoking and drinking in that abandoned shed, was also coming due. And he was reaching out to solidify the plans.

You should’ve waited to read and respond after your friends left, when you had time to yourself, but you didn’t. Clicking the notification, you unlocked the phone to read the message. Only to find it was confirmation for your plane tickets, and a set of dates. The first week of April next year, and for a week.

Back home. Where you hadn’t stepped foot in nearly six years.

A few more messages had followed.

Jeonghan: Told you to keep your schedule open. Jeonghan: See you in April, bug.

**two days before**

You might’ve been overthinking it. No, you were overthinking this as you stared at an empty suitcase, piles of clothes folded around it on your bed, bags of new clothes at the foot of the bed, and your toiletries all laid out on your bathroom counter. All waiting to be packed.

None of your clothes had felt right, the makeup you chose to bring felt too plain, and your nerves were starting to suffocate you. A part of you felt like you shouldn’t feel this nervous, because it was just Jeonghan, but another part felt you were justified because it was Jeonghan. You hadn’t seen him in person since your grandfather’s funeral, only ever seeing his life through photos that he posted online.

Picture of him traveling with Joshua, and with your other friends, and relationships that never seemed to last a few months before the person disappeared from his photos. You watched his success in becoming a pharmacist like he had always wanted and was making a life for himself. He owned his own home, and he appeared happy with his life.

You had done the same, but away from him. You made a life where you now were, and selfishly barely looked back; especially after your grandfather had passed. You made friends where you were, had relationships, started a business with Soonyoung, and you made a life for yourself. You had become a different person, like he had.

This fact wasn’t the only thing that had your nerves starting to settle uneasy in your gut. You were both different, and what if that difference was so great that neither of you could enjoy your time together again. Uncomfortable strangers the entire week instead of old friends looking to reconnect.Not only that, but what if also being back home made it worse? That being there was more painful than it should be, and it made you resent your oldest friend for bringing you back?

Then your phone chimed, with a message coming through.

Jeonghan: See you when you land. Jeonghan: And stop overthinking things. I can hear your thoughts all the way over here. Haha.

That made you burst out in a laugh, because of course this silly line he used to say to you growing up would help loosen some tightness in you. It didn’t settle your nerves though, it only unraveled them, so they weren’t making you want to throw up and cry at the same time.

You responded.

You: Too late, so deal with it.

His response was instantaneous.

Jeonghan: Gladly.

**April**

You swore this entire journey had been one big April Fool’s joke with the way everything had gone wrong. You managed to finally pack everything, though you still weren’t happy with your choices you couldn’t just go naked, but you overslept the morning of your flight. The ride you had ordered was canceled at the last minute, making you late to the airport and nearly missed boarding.

Checking in had been a nightmare, and then there was a delay taking off.

When the plane did finally set off, you thought you would be in the clear for now. It would be smooth flying after this, and the bad luck got itself out of the way now than following you the entire trip. You hoped that the long flight will go well and give you a chance to rest, or Jeonghan was going to see you have an absolute crash out over it all.

You managed to get enough sleep, so you weren’t as cranky when you landed, but it left you feeling stiff. You even tried to stretch some before unboarding, but it and the awkward shuffling didn’t help. Gripping at your carryon, your focus was to get your suitcase and out of the airport. There’s a bed somewhere calling to you, and you were ready to meet the call.

With your suitcase now secured, you checked your phone to see if Jeonghan was there yet after insisting on picking you up instead of ordering a ride. Except when you looked around the semi-crowded airport, you didn’t see him anywhere. There was no sight of the famous Jeonghan smirk, no sign being dramatically held up with your name, or anything like that.

Your phone started to ring in your hands.  

“Where are you?” You answered, pressing the device to your ear and skipping any and all pleasantries. This earned a chuckle on the other side, and your eyes immediately narrowed. Even with the time apart, you knew never to trust that chuckle.

“About that…” He started slowly, showing you were right not to trust it. There was no way he was going to try and fuck with you, but you should’ve known better, “I am running late, car troubles, won’t be there for a few hours. You’re going to have to wait until I get there.”

“Yoon Jeonghan…” You took in a slow breath, trying to fight the annoyance that was bubbling under the surface. No, he wasn’t going to do this to you after the trip you’ve just had, “You better not be fucking with me right now.”

“I wish, I could say I was,” There was a sigh to his voice, but before you could let him have it, he continued, “I am very sorry, bug. I wish I was there to see you right now. With your hair an absolute mess, your sweater falling off you, and the way you are pouting right now. It’s so cute.”

“Huh?” You blinked, looking down at your body. Your sweater had fallen from your shoulders and was resting right at your elbows while strands of your hair escaped the loose ponytail you had put up. How the hell did he know if he wasn’t there? Before you could question it, you felt a light tap on your shoulder. Twisting around, Jeonghan was standing there.

The phone still pressed to his ear, eyes shining with excitement and mischief, and that smirk that you once knew oh so well. His hair was shorter than the last time you seen him with it back to his natural dark brown. He was in a simple black t-shirt with a matching jacket and a pair of white pants, and you couldn’t stop the way your heart skipped at the sight of him.

“April Fool’s. Forgive me?” He teased, barely able to hang up the call before you were throwing your arms around his neck for a hug. The force of you jumping into him made Jeonghan stumble back slightly, but once he was able to catch his footing, his arms wrapped around your waist.

He pulled you so close your body was pressed against his like he had been desperate for this moment, but you were no better. Nuzzling your nose into his shirt, taking in the scent of his perfume and the way he held you tight. His own nose pressed to your hair, breathing in the faint smell of your perfume and shampoo, fingers flexing and squeezing gently at your sides.

Both of you forgot that you were still in the middle of the airport.

“You asshole!” You finally bursted out when the two of you parted, slapping his arm while he laughed at you attempting to scold him. He saw the smile forming over your lips, making the smirk he was wearing turn into a genuine smile. One that nearly stole the very breath from you, “That wasn’t funny.”

“It was a little funny.” He still hadn’t let go of you, his hands resting on your hips like they always belonged there, his gaze drinking you in. Then he stepped back, withdrawing his hold on you to reach for your suitcase handle, “Now, let’s get out of here before you shove me into the cargo hold of one of these planes.”

“You would deserve it,” You retorted earning an eye roll from him. One hand placed firmly against the small of your back, and the other pulling your suitcase behind you. With cool precision, Jeonghan directed you out of the airport while chatting with you about his day and asking you about your flight.

Like it was all part of a daily conversation you would always have, and there was no time between your last full conversation that wasn’t in text.

“After you,” Jeonghan announced, making sure to open the passenger door for you while providing an overexaggerated bow that made you playfully swat his shoulder. A giggle escaped you as you got into the car, while he finished putting your suitcase in the back. Settling into the driver’s seat, he flashed you a lazy smile and you missed the way his hand twitched slightly to reach for yours. Instead he put the car into drive. “Let’s get out of here.”

“You know, you never told me where I was staying.” You told him, your eyes watching the way the town looked now. Businesses that were once there on the main street gone, replaced with franchise stores and popular food spots. Places that you once occupied with your friends or grandparents gone, showing that the town was growing and changing like you had.

It didn’t feel like your old home, but there was still something about it that told you it was. Just with a different look.

“Easy. With me.” He said with no hesitation, making you look at him. He had a pair of black sunglasses on, leaning back against the driver’s seat with one hand on the wheel while the other rested on his lap. Looking relaxed as he drove through the familiar streets. Stopping at a light, he cast a glance your way and you weren’t sure, but you thought that his relaxed smile faltered slightly. “Rather get a room? The old motel is still open, but you might have to cuddle with some roaches and a few rats.”

“I think I am good on that,” You don’t hide your look of disgust, and this made Jeonghan start laughing as the light turned. “I would like the bed I sleep on be free of other occupants.”

“Is that so?” He muttered, his focus on the road letting silence fall over you. The radio was playing quietly, and you started to notice the familiar names of the streets.

They were the same names you would see every day growing up, the same streets you used to run around growing up. You chance a glance toward Jeonghan, only to find his focus on the road but the look on his face told you that he was waiting for your reaction.

Especially once he turned on the familiar street that the two of you grew up on.

“I knew you moved close to family, but I didn’t know you…” The words stopped in your throat when you pulled up to a beautiful home. It looked newer compared to the others on the street. White with grey trimming and a neatly cut yard with a stone pathway that lead right up to a small porch with a planter next to the door.

It was beautiful and unfamiliar, but you knew this property. It didn’t matter how long it had been since you came back; you knew exactly where you were.

“Come on, bug. Let’s get inside.” Jeonghan didn’t give you a chance to process your thoughts before he was shutting off the engine and unbuckle both of your belts. He was out of the car, leaving you there staring at the empty seat that he had once occupied.

It was the sound of the trunk closing that you were able to kick start back up and rushed to get out the car to follow him up the small pathway to the front door. Your heart was pounding in your ears, eyes wide staring at the home and Jeonghan’s back.

Once inside, you didn’t stop to look around the home, instead your feet took you from the front door, through the open living room to a set of glass doors. If Jeonghan had said something to you, you didn’t hear it because your focus was getting to the backyard. You barely looked around the yard itself, just that it was well taken care of.

No, your focus was on the shed that was in the same familiar place. You could feel tears starting to burn your eyes, memories flooding back to you, your eyes flicking over to the fence that once had a broken board. It was fixed with forsythias and azaleas flourishing in front of it, but you could still see a young Jeonghan popping through it while you waited for him at the shed.

“It’s not the same one.” Jeonghan said softly behind you, but you didn’t look back, not wanting him to see a few tears fall. “The old owners finally sold the property four years ago to a realtor company. They rebuilt the house and tore down it before putting the place back on the market.”

“And you bought it.” You responded, finally looking at him. He had his hands in his pants pockets, balancing on the balls on his feet, while his eyes were on you, catching more tears starting to fall.

“Yeah, well, with the help from my parents. With conditions obviously,” Jeonghan continued, keeping his attention on you, “Moment I moved in, I had the shed put back in. It’s used to actually store shit, not a hang out like we used to have it, but just something didn’t feel right without it there.”

“What was the conditions?” You asked in a small voice, trying to wipe away the wetness from your face, when Jeonghan caught your elbow. Pulling you into a hug, he let out a soft tsk.

“Let’s not worry about that right now.” It was a clear deflection, but he wouldn’t let you wiggle away from him to call him out. Then his hands found its way to your sides and started to tickle you.

“Jeonghan!” You let out a small squeal, giggling while trying to get away from him. His own laughter mixed through yours in a sweet melody, helping you forget your tears.

“Come on, let me show you to your room.” His arm thrown lazily over your shoulder, directing you back toward the house. “And no roaches or rats to cuddle with.”

Jeonghan gave you a brief tour of his home, a kitchen and living room open floor style. Three bedrooms, the larger one with an ensuite on one side, while the two smaller ones with a Jack n Jill style on the other. Your room faced the yard, giving you perfect view of the shed, while Jeonghan had the larger room.

He left you to unpack and get cleaned up from your travels. The shower felt good, hot water helping you loosen the still sore muscles from your long flight and fight off the fatigue that you didn’t know was creeping up on you. By the time you had gotten out, your skin felt flushed from the heat with your hands and feet slightly wrinkled. The towel Jeonghan had left out was dark grey, soft and fluffy and felt like heaven against your skin.

It felt good to be out of your airport clothes and in a soft pair of leggings and oversized t-shirt. Your hair was still slightly damp, so you left it loose around your bare face Now that you were back around Jeonghan, the nerves you were feeling all but melted away and didn’t feel like you needed to look all done up just to lounge around the house.

“Hope you’re hungry.” He announced proudly when you finally emerged, setting two beer bottles on the table with a spread of take out. He wasn’t looking your way. “You took so long I managed to make us a feast.”

“Make us a feast huh?” You laughed, crossing your arms as you take in the sight before you. “Wanted to make sure it was authentically homemade by including the plastic containers?”

“I mean, only the best for…” His words died on his tongue as he went to look at you, his hand slowly dropping to his side. There was a flicker of awe and desire that went across his face before he shook his head, and it was replaced with a smirk. “…you...”

“I feel so honored,” You went to pull out of the chairs to sit, but Jeonghan had beat you to it by pulling it out for you instead, before taking a seat next to you, focusing on the containers. Grabbing both beers, you popped them open with ease and set them down in front of you both.

Dinner consisted of the two of you stuffing your faces, battling over the last pieces of meat, which he won by cheating at rock, paper, scissors. You drank several beers between you each while talking about work, friends, family, and life. You told him about meeting Celeste in college then later Soonyoung through her, the jewelry business that you and him thought up after too many bottles of wine, how it actually was doing well, and the couple’s upcoming wedding.

While Jeonghan told you about college, the trouble him and their friends got into, updated you on his parents and sister, and about the pharmacy he works at with Joshua. You laughed over stories, and it felt like no time had passed between you.

“What about relationships?” Jeonghan asked, leaning back in his chair with a beer close to his lips, watching the way you swirled your beer around in the bottle. “Anyone special?”

“Just a vibrator named Owini with two I’s.” This made Jeonghan raise a brow as he took a sip. “O.W.I.N.I. Orgasm when I need it.”

“Clever.” He coughed out after nearly choking on his beer, laughing at the name.

“What about you? Anyone in your life?” It was your turn to watch him, trying to gauge his reaction. Jeonghan was leaning back against the chair, looking forward with a half-smile playing over his lips.

“No one special. At least not for a long time.” He answered finally, finishing his beer with a smack to his lips. Licking them, he sat the beer down onto the table before standing and stretched. He ignores the confused expression on your face with his sudden movements, “Let’s get this all cleaned up bug and have a few more beers. Maybe watch a movie or something.”

You nod your head slowly, following suit to help throw away the empty containers and put away anything that you two didn’t finish. When you were done, Jeonghan grabbed a few more beers from the fridge and met you at the sofa to find something to watch. Picking some random movie that you couldn’t remember the name, both of you talked and laughed until all the beers were empty and Jeonghan was half asleep on the sofa.

**Day 2**

“Oh, it is so good to see you sweetie!” Jeonghan’s mother wouldn’t let go of you, hugging you tightly as if you were going to disappear on her if she did. The next day the two of you had gone to his parents’ for lunch on his mother’s insistence, “I missed you, my dear.”

“I missed you too,” You answered, giving Jeonghan a ‘save me’ look when she didn’t let go, only for him he didn’t come to save you, instead just watched with mild amusement from his place against the kitchen counter. Releasing you from the hug, she grasped your shoulders to look at you, making you turn your gaze back to her.

“You should not stay away so long,” She scolded, leaning forward like she was revealing a secret, “Our Hanni has not been the same since the last time you left.”

“Oh…” You let out a nervous laugh, looking back toward Jeonghan with a questioning gaze, but he was no longer looking at you. Instead, he was staring warning daggers into his mother’s back. It reminded you how he wouldn’t look at you the previous night either, but before you could say anything further, you were being lead to a table full of food.

“Sit, sit. I hope you are hungry, I made all of your favorites.” You were then gently pushed into a seat, with Jeonghan following and took a seat next to you, “Oh goodness, I forgot drinks. Let me grab those.”

“I told her not to do all this, but she insisted,” Jeonghan had muttered so only you could hear.

“I believe it,” You responded back, leaning toward him with a raised brow, “What did she mean by you haven’t been the same?”

“Nothing, just missed my best friend is all,” He answered simply. For a brief moment you thought his gaze dropped to your lips before he looked away to speak with his mother. Changing the subject all together as well.

The rest of the visit had consisted of more catching up, with Jeonghan’s father and sister coming by to join in, but you were barely able to pay attention. You couldn’t stop looking over toward Jeonghan, feeling that there was something more than ‘he just missed his best friend’.  Like true Jeonghan fashion, he didn’t give anything away.

There was a possibility that you might be looking too much into it, reminding yourself that before you left for college, the two of you were with each other every day, and were inseparable. Hell, every time you came home, you and Jeonghan would always be together. Then after your grandfather passed away, you just… stopped coming back.

It wasn’t that you had wanted to stay away, it just was harder to come back now that both your grandparents were gone. It was hard to come back when you no longer would walk into the home you grew up to them, and life just kept getting into the way. Work ended up taking precedence since you and Soonyoung were focused on your jewelry company, finding the time off had grew harder, or whatever excuse you gave to make yourself feel better for not coming back.

You had known that it had affected Jeonghan, going from having his best friend every day to a few times a year to sparse messages and social media posts, but you didn’t think that meant ‘he hasn’t been the same’.

After leaving the Yoons’, you went with him to run a few errands that he’d needed to run, and the entire time you still had his mother’s words playing in your head. Which he noticed, but like him, you wouldn’t give anything away, giving the excuse you were just in a food coma.

“I don’t believe you, just so you know.” He told you, pushing up his sunglasses with one finger while his other hand rested on the steering wheel. Casting a glance toward you, he noticed that you were looking out the passenger window. “You can keep your secrets for now, but I will get them out of you. I always do.”

“I can say the same for you.” You chirped back, your eyes on the different buildings passing by, taking in the different buildings. Some familiar, some different. You could hear him let out a breathy laugh. “You have your secrets, and I have mine. If I have to spill so will you.”

“Touche, bug.”

Once back to Jeonghan’s, you disappeared into your room to answer some emails and make a few calls for work. You may have been on a trip, but that didn’t mean that you were truly on vacation, and the workload never ends. Soonyoung was a great business partner and assured you that he had it all handled so you can enjoy your time away (since you would be doing the same when he and Celeste went on their honeymoon), but you needed a bit of a distraction.

“You hungry?” Jeonghan had asked at one point, knocking at your door as he opened it. A smile playing over his lips seeing you sitting cross legged on your bed, laptop open in front of you. You had changed into a pair of comfortable shorts and a baggy sweater, your hair pulled back out of your face (save for a strand that wouldn’t stay) and look of concentration on your face.

You didn’t hear the hitch in his breath when you looked up at him, that look of concentration melt away to a small smile as you shook your head.

“I’m still full from that feast your mom made us,” You answered with a laugh, looking back to the laptop and to the email you had been working on. “I’m almost done here, just need to send off a few more emails, and then call Soonyoung regarding a large order of smokey quartz for our Smokey collection. I shouldn’t be too much longer.”

“You do know the whole point of this trip was to also not worry about work?” Jeonghan teased, making his way to the bed and flopped down onto the empty space next to you. Rolling onto his side, he looked up at you with his dark round eyes, shining with mischief with his hand inching toward the laptop to shut. Which you reached out and took with yours, holding it as you placed it back onto the bed. Making him pout.

“I am almost done, I promise.” You told him, not expecting the sudden urge to lean forward to kiss the pout he was sporting, nor the way you were still holding his hand. Or that he had adjusted the hold so that your fingers were laced together.

“Well, when you’re done, I’ll be right here.” He responded, finally letting go of your hand to roll onto his back, pulling his phone out to scroll. You raised your brow at him, he didn’t even look your way when he added, “Don’t look at me like that. I’m lonely out there and you’re in here working.”

“Price to pay on owning your own business.”

Though you did manage to get some work done, you couldn’t really concentrate with Jeonghan lying next to you, now fast asleep with his phone resting face down on his chest. The soft clicking of your fingers against the keys had lulled him into a sleep and you found yourself watching him several times. Taking in the way he still looked like the boy you had grown up with, only older. Thick lashes kissing his skin, skin still smooth but with the hints of age coming through. The lips that were pouting at you earlier, soft and plush looking, partially open with a soft snore leaving him. He looked peaceful, he looked breathtaking, he looked like he was where he was meant to be. Next to you. Your Jeonghan.

Your heart fluttered at this notion, the words your Jeonghan felt different even in your head. Or was it always this way and you just ignored it since he was your best friend.

When you finished your emails and came time to call Soonyoung, you chose to take it outside to not disturb the sleeping man next to you. You also wanted to enjoy the evening weather, finding yourself sitting on the step of the shed to take your call and maybe clear your head some.

The shed wasn’t the same, but the memories were still there when you sat down on the newer wood. The years you and Jeonghan spent in the old rickety building that once stood there, doing things that looking back neither of you had any business doing as teenagers. Drinking, smoking, and everything else that came with being rebellious teens and too much freedom to do it all.

It shaped who you both were as adults, and still a part of who you were. Even if you tried to run away.

“There you are.” Jeonghan’s tired voice had pulled you from your thoughts and tore your gaze from a patch in the grass to him. His face slightly puffy from sleep, and a yawn escaping him as he made his way to you before flashing you a lazy half grin. “Was wondering where you went.”

“I had to call Soonyoung and you were snoring. I didn’t want to wake you or have him questioning if I was next to a walrus.” You teased, unable to stop the corners up your lips to twitch up, earning a chuckle from the slender man.

“So, kind of you.” He muttered reaching you, leaning against the wall of the shed. The sun had already dropped past the horizon, but there was still a glow to the yard, emphasizing the shadows and adding a hauntingly beautiful look to the spring evening. “Clocked out now?”

“I’m always clocked in.” This made him chuckle, before slipping into his pocket to pull out a lighter and a joint. With the rolled herb between his lips, he lit it with the lighter. Taking a deep inhale, you watched him blow the smoke out. Looking your way, he offered it.

“You still smoke?” He asked, and you looked at the joint then back to his face. A brow raised, “Vernon managed to find some for me. I haven’t smoked since the last time you were here…”

“I actually quit myself,” You told him reaching out to take the burning herb and took a hit of it. The paper was damp from his lips, and the smoke felt harsher than it had in the past, making you cough out the cloud of smoke instead of inhaling it. You managed to take another pull from it, filling your lung with the herbal smoke. Allowing the head change take effect.

A silence followed, just the two of you passing the joint between you. Leaning back, your eyes went up toward the sky to take in the darkening sky as the stars start to appear. While Jeonghan just watched you.

“What did you mom mean?” You asked softly, after a few minutes of feeling his gaze and the joint passing between you. Looking down at the nearly finished joint, now a roach at this point, flicking some ash handing off it. “How weren’t you the same?”

“Were you?” He returned your question with one of his own, reaching for what was left of the joint. You let out a scoff.

“Of course I wasn’t. I lost both my grandparents within a year of each other, had to watch my uncle stick that stupid for sale sign in the ground before the dirt settle so he could pay his debts…” You waved your hand in the air at nothing, before dropping it into your lap. Pushing your tongue into your cheek, you continued. “I was hurting, I was angry at my uncle, I felt like I had nothing here that was mine anymore, and I just wanted to run away.” You took a breath, closing your eyes to hold back the angry tears that were prickling behind them. Remembering that feeling ruined your high. “I left already not the same, but how were you?”

Jeonghan didn’t respond for a moment, the flick of the lighter making you look toward him to find that a second joint appeared and was lighting it. He took a quick inhale of the sweet herb, before handing it to you.

“You need this more than I do,” He muttered as you took it, making you tempted to throw it at him and tell him to go fuck himself, but you stopped yourself. He looked up toward the sky, crossing his arms and you took in how he looked. His baggy jeans, and a shirt that had enough room for the both of you, hair sticking up from sleeping in your bed, and a pair of wired glasses. Ones he had to of thrown on after waking up.

You were slow to take a hit of the herb, watching him carefully.

“You had me.” He finally said, not answering your question. It should’ve infuriated you and call him out if you didn’t look so confused. Licking his lips, he looked at you before repeating himself. “You had me here still. I thought I was home for you too.”

Maybe he was answering after all, in his own cryptic way.

“You were… you are…” You told him, before sighing, “I don’t regret how long I’ve been gone, but I do regret not keeping in touch better with you. I should’ve tried better for that.”

“Maybe, but you’re here now.” Jeonghan leaned forward and took the joint from you. “I plan to make sure you remember that you’re home with me.”

You watched as the joint pressed between his lips, the way his eyes closed slightly as he took a hit, unable to tear your gaze away. Slowly his eyes opened and you could see there was a sign of mischief there. Hiding away the vulnerableness that he’d been displaying. You watch the way his own gaze dropped to your lips then back to your eyes, blowing the smoke gently from the side of his mouth.

“Why do I feel like you are trying to make me fall in love with you?” You asked, meaning for it to be a tease but it came out breathier then you meant. Part of you thinking he might kiss you, but instead he let out a laugh, leaning back against the shed wall. Like nothing happened.

“Who knows, maybe I am.”

**Day 3**

To say you didn’t really do anything was a bit of an understatement. There has been no plans for the day, aside from the plans to meet friends later, so you just laid around. Collecting your energy for a night out drinking and spending time with old friends. Well, at this point they felt more like Jeonghan’s friends rather than your own, but he had insisted that wasn’t the case. That everyone missed you and were excited to see you again.

Jeonghan also continued on the day like the previous night didn’t happen, as if he didn’t look at you like he wanted to kiss you, or ‘joke’ about you falling in love with him. He just laid around with you, bugging you at random times about how bored he was, but wouldn’t get up to do anything. He would whine about how warm you were, but he seemed to scoot closer instead of away.

He would random poke you if you weren’t paying attention to him, complain about anything you turned on, but refused to choose anything. And the entire time used his pouty voice if you snapped at him.

 “That’s it!” You growled out, grabbing the hand that attempted to pull a strand of hair falling into your face, distracting you so his other hand could tickle at your side. With his fingers brushing against the bare skin of your tank that had ridden up, making you jolt and grab that hand as well. Wrestling to get him to stop.

You’d forgotten that Jeonghan was a lot stronger than he looked, and could easily break your hold, but instead he was letting you think you were overpowering him. Filling the room with laugher, and in your wrestle, you found yourself straddling him.

Then you both froze, realizing how close you were. The tips of your noses brushing, both breathing heavy from the exertion, eyes locked with a new emotion coursing through you. Deeper than desire. Your hold then loosened on his wrists.

Now this wasn’t the first time you had ended up like this, you had many times in the past wrestling with each other. You’d done it since you were kids, with it always ending with you both laughing and unable to keep annoying the other.

This time…this time it was all different.

Your name fell from his lips before you were kissing him, which Jeonghan didn’t hesitate to return. His hands dropped down to your waist, pulling you closer until your chest was flushed against each other. A whimper left you at the desperation that flooded him, his tongue sliding over your bottom lip, wanting more—which you willing gave him.

His lips felt like heaven against yours, and the way his tongue teased yours it left you needing more of him. More and more. Your fingers pushing through his soft strands, while his dug into your hips to pulling them down to grind on him. Feeling him already hardening underneath the soft grey fabric of his sweats, making you grow hot with need and dampen your underwear.

Then you broke from the kiss, staring at your best friend in shock while he stared at you with desperate need in his heavy lidded eyes. His bottom lip swollen from your kiss, hands still holding onto your hips like a vice, and his arousal pressing against you. With your own body ablaze with the same need right down to your core.

“I…” You scrambled off him to stand, “I… we shouldn’t have done that. I’m sorry… I… I need to get ready for tonight.”

Before Jeonghan could answer or stop you, you were already rushing to your room. Slamming the door behind you as you went, leaving him to stare at the space where you had been standing. Licking his lips, he slammed his fist onto the sofa cushion in frustration but stopped the frustrated groan that wanted to escape. Standing, he took off toward his room.

The ordered ride to the bar was an awkward one, with neither of you would speak or look at each other. You on one side of the backseat, playing with the pockets of your cargo pants before readjusting your tank and cardigan, the fabric not feeling like they fit right. While Jeonghan sat on the other side, looking out the window while his own hands were balled into fists on his lap.

The kiss hung between you, leaving you unsure how to approach it while Jeonghan was just unreadable. There’d been moments you thought he was angry with you, others he seemed frustrated, and then finally he appeared…sad. It ate at you, making it even harder to find the words.

The sound that erupted from the group when you entered the bar was almost deafening, and making others look your way. You were then showered with hugs, first by the girls and followed by Seungcheol, Vernon, and Joshua. Jeonghan had disappeared to the bar, leaving you to greet everyone.

“It’s been way to long,” Eunji couldn’t stop saying, hugging you for what felt like the nth time, “I thought you weren’t ever coming back.”

“I know, I’m sorry. I just… needed to be away.” You answered, when she finally let go of you for good, but that was because her fiancé, Vernon, had pulled her back to his side.

“No need to explain to us. We understand.” It was Vernon who spoke up, a finger wrapped through a hoop of Eunji’s pants, keeping her in place. “What matters is that you’re back.”

“And me missing you all matters too, ya know?” You pointed out with a teasing smile, when a cold glass of beer was pushed into your hands, making you look up to see Jeonghan had rejoined the group. He didn’t look at you, instead moving to Seungcheol and Joshua, leaving the others to surround you. Looking down at the beer, you hoped that your friends didn’t pick up the tension between you. Which by the silence and looks everyone was giving each other, you knew better.

You could see the way Eunji was about to open her mouth, only for her fiancé’s hand conveniently found its place over it. Minnie, who had been waiting for her moment to give you a proper hug, gave you a questioning gaze, while Seungcheol, Joshua, and Joshua’s wife looked at Jeonghan.

“I see one thing hasn’t changed,” Minnie had murmured into your ear, taking the beer so she could get an actual hug from you, “We are going to be talking about this.”

As the night went on, the tension between you and Jeonghan had loosened with him eventually finding his way back to your side. Arm thrown over your shoulder, like he hadn’t been giving you the cold shoulder since running from him and the kiss you shared, as he talked and laughed with everyone. Poking, teasing, and smiling at you like you hadn’t just rejected him in one of the worst ways possible.

It had helped you relax outwardly, joining in with the talking, teasing, even leaning into him and his touch. It was easy to do, even with the tension burning between you, it was easy to lean into his warmth like he would you. Except inwardly, you had a war raging on. One that involved the very man you were leaning into.

“I’m going for a cigarette.” Minnie announced, lifting Seungcheol’s hand off her knee to stand, grabbing her designer bag in the process, “Who’s coming with me?”

“I will,” Eunji practically jumped out of her seat, looking around the table for anyone else, both of them stopping briefly on you and Lily, Joshua’s wife. Subtly hinting that you were to join them.

“I have to pass. I been trying to quit, and don’t want to be tempted, sorry.” Lily answered, sipping at the bright blue cocktail she had ordered.

“Never apologize for that. You got more will power than I do,” Minnie waved her hand, her eyes going back to you, “Anyone else?”

“I’ll go,” You announce, standing with Jeonghan’s arm falling from your shoulder as you did. Making him look at you with a confused expression, “Just need a bit of fresh air. I’ll be back.”

You barely make it out of the bar before you were being cornered by the two women.

“Okay, spill.” Eunji demanded as Minnie pulled out a pack of cigarettes, grabbing two and a lighter from the box. One for each woman.

“What are you talking about?” You attempted to feign ignorance, but it was clear the two didn’t buy it. The three of you were very close growing up, they witnessed how you and Jeonghan were, and still knew you better than you realized.

“Either one of three things is going on here. You two either have nothing to talk about, and it’s awkward as shit…” Minnie responded, placing the cigarette to her lips and lit it.

“Which is impossible with you two,” Eunji chimed in, taking the lighter from Minnie to light her own. “No matter how many years have passed.”

“You got into a stupid fight over something like the color of his socks, or…” Minnie walked closer, holding the cigarette out enough so the smoke wasn’t hitting your face, taking in how you crossed your arms and looked away. Leaning in, it felt like the last one was more of a secret, “Something happened between the two of you…”

“And you were the one to freak out.” Eunji finished for her, “And now it’s awkward.”

“Why would it be me?”

“Because it’s always you.” Vernon’s voice popped up behind you, causing the three of you to jump. He casually walks past you to Eunji, taking his cigarette in the process to take a drag, “I had a feeling they were doing that weird best friend gang up thing.”

“I don’t know what you are talking about.” You answer, feeling your cheeks starting to burn.

“They kissed,” Vernon took another long drag of the nicotine stick, causing your jaw to drop opened, “Jeonghan told us in there.”

“Of course he did,” You muttered, watching the way Eunji and Minnie were ready to start jumping for joy.

“Finally?!” Eunji asked with excitement, but from the look on Vernon’s face, as well as yours, that Jeonghan didn’t stop there. Flicking the ash off the cigarette, the younger man took one more drag before handing it back to his fiancé.

“And that you freaked out and ran.”

“I didn’t run, I didn’t even leave the house.” You tried to defend yourself while your two friends excitement started to deflate.

“No, but you locked yourself in your room.” It was times like this that Vernon made you wonder how easy it was to get away with murder. Eunji will be able to find love again, she can move on, and you could disappear. Change your name, live in a small cottage in the middle of nowhere.

“Ugh,” Eunji let out a groan, dropping her head back and shoulders down in frustration. While Minnie could only stare at you, gaze unreadable as she pressed her cigarette to her lips, with one arm crossed her midsection.

“What?” You asked, your own frustration started to bubble over as it slowly started to occur to you that your friends knew something that you didn’t know. Something that Jeonghan clearly was aware of, but not you. Something about you and him. “I kissed him, yes. We were wrestling and it just happened, but it shouldn’t have. It just made things awkward and could just ruin our friendship.” You didn’t mention how much you wanted to do it again but couldn’t risk losing him for good. “What is with this ‘finally’ shit, anyways? Like shouldn’t you guys be worried that this could ruin our already fragile friendship.”

There was a silence as the three looked at each other. Like it dawned on them that you really didn’t know.

“You really don’t know?” It was Minnie who asked, taking another long drag as she moved her gaze to you again, followed by the couple behind her.

“Know what Min?” You sighed, dropping your arms to your sides, but there was something deep in you that told you that you already knew. Something that was sitting inside you for years, and you refused to acknowledge it, because it was easier than to face it.

There was a beat of silence between the four of them, with Eunji focused on her cigarette, Minnie watching you with an almost pitied look, and Vernon pushing his tongue into his cheek. Each of them waiting for the other to either come out with it, or for it to finally dawn on you. For you to finally see it.

“That he’s in love with you…” It was Vernon who said it, since neither of the girls spoke up, then his attention went to Minnie, “You think I can get my own smoke?”

You stood there in absolute silence while a pack of cigarettes exchanged hands, staring at your friends. It wasn’t that you had needed to process this, it wasn’t that at all. Instead, the words reached into your chest, into your heart and pulled out something you already known. Something he was trying to tell you, that he’s been trying to tell you.

“You guys are insane,” You finally spoke, looking away from them, pulling your cardigan around you when a cool breeze hit. “Jeonghan loves me, but he’s not in love with me.”

“Are you saying that to convince us, or convince yourself?” Minnie then asked, taking the pack back, her voice soft and understanding. You didn’t answer, still not looking at her, Vernon or Eunji, not trusting yourself to. “Did Jeonghan tell you what his parents condition was when they helped him buy that house?”

“No…” You had asked Jeonghan at least twice what this condition was, but he wouldn’t answer and would change the subject. Instead of pushing though, you just let him change it, so you didn’t have to actually hear it.

“The condition was that he settle downs like the rest of us,” She continued, and you could feel your mouth go dry, make your stomach churn uncomfortably. Unsure if it was from the alcohol, hearing all this, or both, “Or he would have to pay them back every penny.”

This made you look up to see her smiling at you, with it being as soft as her voice. Minnie flicked the ash off the near finished cigarette, your friends letting you take in what you were being told.

“What does that have to do with me, though?” You asked, feeling like you already knew the answer without it having to be said.

“Because.” Dropping the cigarette onto the ground, the taller woman hooked your arm with hers to walk back to the bar. Leaving Vernon and Eunji to finish their own smokes, “For him, the condition wasn’t just anyone, because to him, it only would be you.”

You’d barely made it back into the bar before Jeonghan had let out an overexaggerated yawn as he announced that he was going to order a ride home. This earned a chorus of groans from everyone, except for you. Your brain was already a buzz from the conversations outside, with the only thing you could do was stare at him. The bill of his hat pulled low, with it and his hair falling over his eyes. There was a deep frown playing over his lips, and body language reading that he no longer wanted to be there.

“You staying?” He asked you, making you blink out of your thoughts, already having his phone out to get a ride ordered. Several pairs of eyes turn to you, waiting for your response. Minnie had found her place back next to Seungcheol, leaning into her boyfriend, watching you with a knowing gaze.

Telling you to go with him.

“Nah, I’m getting tired myself.” You answered, letting out a chuckle, “I honestly am surprised I managed as long as I have. I’ve traded a night out at the bar with a bottle of wine at home, and most times in bed.”

Jeonghan nodded, already having the ride ordered, and the group advanced on you. Hugging you tightly, telling you to keep in touch, and to visit more often. With Minnie hugging you a little longer than everyone.

“Call me tomorrow, okay?” She whispered in your ear, “If you don’t plan to return his feelings, then let him down gently.”

Neither of you said anything on the ride back to Jeonghan’s, but this time the silence felt different. It wasn’t tense like it was on the way to the bar, it had shifted after being out for a few hours to something that you had a hard time describing. His tired silence, leaning back in the seat with his eyes out the window, watching everything pass by. One hand resting against his head while the other rested between you both.

Beckoning you to take it.

Except you didn’t, with your own gaze looking out the car window as well. Vernon and Minnie’s words heavy in your head.

“He’s in love with you.”

“…because to him, it only would be you.”

“If you don’t plan to return his feelings, then let him down gently.”

They left you with one of two choices by doing this. Finally face what was always between you and talk to Jeonghan, or you run away again. Get the earliest flight you can and leave before Jeonghan could wake up. Continue to run away. Destroy a lifelong friendship, one that you were meant to reconnect during your stay, because you were the coward.

You needed to make a choice. You needed to make one then.

“I’m going to head to bed, I am pretty tired,” Jeonghan announced once back, making sure the door was locked behind you before flicking his gaze to you. Taking you in, while he forced a smile to his lips and another beat of silence followed.

He was waiting for you to say something, anything. It was your chance, you either faced it or you ran away, but words failed you. They failed you in a way that never happened before with him, and it scared you.

“Goodnight, bug.” He whispered finally turning toward his room, nodding his head like he received his answer again. An answer to a question or a confession that he never said out loud.

It suddenly infuriated you.

“Are you in love with me?” You blurted out, causing Jeonghan to stop only a few steps away, watching the way his back straightened at the question. The accusation.

“Yes, I am.” He answered without hesitation, turning to look at you. That forced smile turning into a sardonic smirk when your eyes widened at how easy it was for him to say it, “I am in love with you.”

“For how long?”

“Does it matter?” The question as simple.

“Yes…no…just tell me.” You let out a frustrated sigh, shoulders dropping as you do.

“I’ve loved you since we were children, even when you would pull my hair,” He let out a chuckle, crossing his arms, “But realized I was in love with you when I had to watch you board that plane for school.”

“And why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because it was easier to watch you go not knowing than if you did.” Jeonghan’s voice was low, the words stripping everything away that he hid behind, letting you see the raw side of him. And he still held eye contact with you.

“And the condition with your parents…”

“I had no intention fulfilling it if it wasn’t going to be you.” You noticed that he had started to close the distance that as originally there, pulling off his cap in the process so you could see his face better. Looking at you in a way he never had before, or that you noticed.

“Why?”

“Because no matter how I pictured my future, when it came to who I would spend my life with…” Jeonghan was now in front of you, close enough that you could feel his breath against your face. His hand ghosting over your cheek. You couldn’t move, you didn’t want to move, you were scared to move, “It’s always you. It’s always been you.”

“Jeonghan…” His name came out in a whisper, tears starting to fall down your cheek and that was when you felt the coolness of his hand cupping your cheek. His thumb wiping away a few away. “You’re an asshole.”

A soft laugh left him, dropping his hand and taking a step back. Taking your comment as a rejection, but it wasn’t. It was far from it. You finally found a name to what that missing piece was when it came to Jeonghan. Your best friend, the boy who would be waiting for you in that run down shed every day, the teen who would get in trouble with you, the young man who let you go even though there was an ache in both your chests, and the man standing before you.

All these versions of him were one thing to you. Your Jeonghan.

“You’re an asshole for not telling me sooner…” You pouted, grabbing the sleeves of his shirt to stop him, refusing to look away from him. His stupid, assholish, beautiful face.

“Yeah?” Jeonghan countered back, inching closer to you, his eyes flicking to your mouth.

“Yeah.”

He then kissed you, heated and hungry, like something inside him snapped; unable to hold back any longer. He had a taste of you earlier, and now that he had you again, he couldn’t keep pretending. You returned the kiss with a fever, gripping at the sleeves of his shirt because if you didn’t, he’d disappear.

His hand finding their place at your hips, squeezing them when you deepened the kiss, greedy to taste him again like you had earlier. This time with the notes of beer still lingering, but you were sure you were just the same. Releasing the sleeves of his shirt, you traced them over your shoulders and up his neck, earning a low groan from him when you gripped at the soft strands of his hair.

Hearing this sound sent a wave of heat down your belly, right to your core, your thighs squeezing slightly and enough for Jeonghan to notice. Making him pull away from your lips, reluctantly since he attempted to dive back in to reclaim them, only to stop himself.

“You’ll need to stop me now, because I have no intentions on it.” He said softly, willing to step away if you didn’t want to. You laugh pushing him toward his bedroom, tripping over each other and pulling off clothes in the process. With your bra and top gone before you made it through his bedroom door.

His shirt following quickly after, giving way to a lean frame with smooth undefined muscles, but you could feel them under your touch. Your cargos off next, leaving you in a pair of grey lace underwear, and Jeonghan had twisted you so the he was the one guiding you to his bed. His mouth claiming yours right as you felt his bed hit the back of your knees, making you drop down onto it.

Looking up to see Jeonghan standing before you, his eyes roaming from your own down your body before returning to them. His expression one of disbelief, like he couldn’t believe you were on his bed, half naked. And just for him.

“Hanni…” Anything you had to say was stopped by his kiss, more heated than any of the others you had shared.

Your hands and mouths touching and kissing anywhere and everywhere you could. His mouth teasing your breasts, sucking at the hardened peaks, while your hands ran over his body. Feeling his hardened cock over his pants before they too were gone. Followed by his boxers, and then your underwear.

“Fuck…your mouth is heaven,” He moaned out when you took his cock into your mouth, swallowing him down your throat eagerly, savoring the taste of him. With a few expert movements, Jeonghan had to pull back to stop from cumming down your throat and ending it all too soon. “We are going to have to revisit this later.”

“But…” Your words were swallowed up by his kiss, tongue claiming yours, pushing your back against the bed, his hips pushing your legs apart. Moaning at the feeling of his saliva slicked cock pressing against your own soaked cunt, rolling your hips up against his. Needing more of him.

When you felt two fingers tweak at one of your nipples, you roll him onto his back, straddling him. Grinding down onto him while one of your hands slip between you to grip his cock. With a gentle squeeze, Jeonghan broke from the kiss to drop his head back with a groan, moving both hands to your hips. The head of his cock catching at your entrance, making you both gasp.

Then you sank down onto him, a silent cry leaving you while Jeonghan’s eyes rolled at the way he stretched your gripping walls, until you were completely onto him. Only you didn’t stay there long, not giving either of you the chance to adjust before you were moving. Planting your hands onto the bed, you lift your hips off him, leaving only the head of his cock in you before dropping down.

Jeonghan’s hands gripped onto your hips, his eyes glazed over from arousal and the sight of you. Seeing parts of you that he only imagined, your bare breasts bouncing with each movement of your hips, your mouth falling open in pleasure, right down to where your two were now connected. The feeling of your walls squeezing and gripping at him was better than any late night thoughts could compare.

He knew he wasn’t going to last long, but he also didn’t want this to ever end. There was no way he could ever go back after this, he wouldn’t be able to go back to anything with you that didn’t involve this. Didn’t involve you being his.

“Jeonghan…” You whimpered, grinding down onto him to get more friction, feeling yourself winding tighter. The knot deep in your core threatening to snap. Then one of his hands slide from your hip to between your legs, pushing his finger up to tease your clit. “I’m close…”

“Do it, baby. Don’t hold back.” He tried to play it cool with a smirk, but he was just as much of a whimpering mess like you are. Looking up at you like you were the only thing that ever mattered. You were the only thing that ever mattered to him.

“Shit, Shit…” You chanted, every muscle tightening as you came, “I love you, I love you.”

Then you were on your back, Jeonghan rolling you over without pulling out, taking over for you. Fucking into you with a vigor you never experienced from him.

“I love you…” He whispered into your mouth, cupping your face, his own release following quickly after. Neither of you moved, staying connected as you came down from your highs, with him now pulling back to look at you. Your well kissed lips, your hair a mess from running your fingers through it, and your still glazed over eyes. A scene that made him fall even more in love. “Please don’t leave… stay… I can’t let you go again.”

“Jeonghan…” You sigh, closing your eyes as you attempted to slip off him. Oversensitivity starting to take over, but he kept you there on top of him. “I have to though…” That was when you felt his hands loosen on your hips, and the look on his face nearly broke you, but still a small smile graced your lips, “I mean… If I plan to move back, I got to get everything in order…”

“No you don’t,” He pouted, and you leaned forward to kiss him. Soft, promising. “You can just start back over here… I am not letting you go.”

“Then I guess we need to buy you a plane ticket then.” You tease, brushing a strand of hair from his face. His stupid, assholish, beautiful face that you’ve loved for years. “Cause I do have to go back.”

“We’ll see about that,” He smirked, making you laugh. “I love you. Always you.”

Thank you so much for reading I seriously hope you all enjoyed this!

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