Pyro Posting @hydropyro - Tumblr Blog

Blog Masterlist

This is more for me, but hopefully it also helps anyone who may be interested to navigate the chaotic black hole that is my blog.

This list links to more lists. Listception. Lists to lists below

#sorting my life out #jk just my blog #Baldur's Gate 3 #Raphael Simp #Simpathy For The Devil #Alakvyr #Abdirak

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insomniamamma

The anon button is not for hate. The anon button is for horny and embarrassed about it.

miscling

rb if you want people to be horny and embarrassed on anon in your inbox

Me: playing a 500 year old male drow cleric of Loviatar

Me: ‘stabalise’ the redbrand who switched sides mid fight and went down — with a knife across his throat.

My party: wtf? Why did you murder that redbrand we made a temporary and tenuous ally ship with?

Me: No! I tried to heeeaaalll him but I rolled a 1 😩 Loviatar giveth and she taketh

Me: making friends with goblin we captured because we don’t know where we’re going.

My party: remember what happened last time? (Holds up head of nothic I tried to adopt and who was turned against me against his will because he’s a mindless foodie and didn’t mean to hurt me)

Me: bah. Continues to make friends. Gets us to where we are going. Holds out money to pay goblin three agreed upon gold.

Chilltouch

My party: shocked and appalled. ‘He believed us! He was gonna get us inside!’

Me: Imma drow! I don’t trust that stupid subdrow goblin

#imma drow #😩#trying to roleplay here #DM doesn’t know FR Lore #DM is my sister

kyonite

trying to create an ebay account to sell smthn and tell me why I can't use my REAL LEGAL LAST NAME because it includes "dick" which ebay considers offensive

BUT THEN IN THEIR MISREPRESENTATION POLICY THEY SAY YOU CAN'T COLLECT MONEY TO A BANK ACCOUNT THAT'S NOT IN YOUR BUSINESS OR LEGAL NAME. BUT MY LEGAL NAME INCLUDES DICK, WHICH YOU CONSIDER OFFENSIVE.

the sanitization of the internet is so fucking stupid we live in the stupidest time

theconcealedweapon

maarvarq

Always bear in mind that there is absolutely no legitimate evidence that Luigi was actually the one who killed the insurance company guy.

theconcealedweapon

Of course he wasn't. He was at a party with me that day.

tiny-space-whale

No but like literally, actually. All bits aside.

He didn't do it.

The cops very clearly planted evidence on him because they had to make an arrest because all eyes were on them and whoever actually did the deed was making them look stupid.

Why would the real killer hero have kept the weapon on his person and traveled two states over while carrying it and a manifesto in his bag, conveniently turning the crime into a federal matter? The same guy whose bag they found in a park, filled with monopoly money? Why did the police turn off their bodycams, take Luigi's stuff, drive a block away, turn their bodycams back on, go back into the restaurant, and then arrest him?

From the moment of his arrest, even left-of-center media has been presuming his guilt without examining anything (e.g. calling him "the killer" instead of "alleged" or "accused") and then when I say he didn't do it, the nearest person chimes in with some quip that tells me they think he did do it but should go free anyway. Don't get me wrong, I would have the same attitude if he had done it. But he didn't. It makes me feel like the only sane person in the world, even among my staunchly leftist friends.

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Fae creature in a dimension of the faewild: What is your name?

The smartest character in the party: ☝️🐯

My name is Morning [Antonius Felis Tigerius Grreatus Cerealis] Frost

#legends of avantris #once upon a witchlight #morning frost #made up middle names (plural)

imjunebitch

Achilles throwing himself to the ground crying to mom because the Greek kings won’t let you keep your sex slave like

#reading the Iliad #live reaction #this shouldn’t be as funny as it is

Achilles was a twink

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk

catchymemes

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$fractally blog's avatar$

fractally

don't worry about me when I say this but I think in a way being hunted for sport would be a relief. my nervous system would be like, wow. finally, a proportional reaction

sforzzz

this isn't right...

progestrogenized

awwwww, that second number is sooooo little and cute, look at it!! it's basically perfect🥺🥺🥺

hydropyro

I have some small peepis appreciation writing if anyone would want to read 👉👈🥺

pitchburgh

saw someone trying to roast this guy on reddit but all the comments were just like "fuck off, that's based"

nature is healing

augustdementhe

FUCK YEAH.

I AM A SUITABLE AUDIENCE

#I’m an adult #let me see #let me in #😩

weterpete

Um no I'm pretty sure those are both switches

prettyaveragewhiteshark

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greenwithenby-deactivated201609

People who prefer hot weather: Snow and ice are a pain, and the cold is just kind of uncomfortable even when you wrap up, you know?

People who prefer cold weather: MY SKIN LITERALLY MELTS OFF EVERY SUMMER I AM A FUCKING HUMAN SOUP AS WE SPEAK

greenwithenby-deactivated201609

you wouldn’t believe how many people reblogged this to whine about hot weather in the tags.

nucleic-friend-deactivated20171

too cold? put on another layer!

too hot? change into thinner clothes!

still too cold? put on another layer!

still too hot? uh, get naked I guess?

still too cold? put on another layer!

still too hot? Ţ̡̜̮̗̟̯͘ͅA̛͈͎̤͙̳̦̱̜̺̪K̢̻̥̥̥̪̙̜̩̗̼̤̻̻͖͍̜͈͉͠ͅE̟͕̩͔̪͓͔̥̦͇̣͇̳͕͉͜ͅ ̠̝̥̖̭̦̼́͝O̩̦͓̠͉̲̲̱̪̹̻̼̭̯͎͈̕͢F̷̸̢̛̙͇͔̜̙̮̗̲̤͇̯͡F̧̨̱̤̲̫͕͔̼̭͙̠̙͙̹̻ͅ ҉̫̠͓̙̠͔̕͜͠Y͡҉̴̘̭̬̳́O̶̶̧͚̞̣̯̩̫̜̩͉̤͎͖̖͟ͅU̶̵̺̠̪̘̱̮̮̙̻͈̣̦̭͠͝͞R̨҉̦̺͓̩̺͖̘̪̥̺͚̱͚͔̪͓̖̰ ̷̸̺͇̳͇̖̥̻̳͚̗̥͙̪̣́S̡̞̳͖̭̯͉̻̠͔̥̹̫̣̼̹͇͜K͏̧͍̪̗̖̜̫̙̱̫͈̟̝̮͈̻̺̯̟̠̀Į̧̙͙͔̠͖̟̕͝Ǹ͖͎̳͍̪̱̞͇̺̘̩͘͜͠