h ü p f e n !

𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄

“  let’s go home.  ” “  um,  excuse me?  ” “  you broke it.  ” “  need a hand?  ” “  please,  help me.  ” “  i missed you.  ” “  i’m not sorry.  ” “  tell the truth.  ” “  what happened here?  ” “  got a minute?  ” “  life’s a bitch.  ” “  you’ve done enough.  ” “  i’m still learning.  ” “  don’t touch me.  ” “  was that you?  ” “  there’s no god.  ” “  you deserve better.  ” “  you’re a saint.  ” “  you are enough.  ” “  maybe you’re right.  ” “  this will pass.  ” “  you complete me.  ” “  you got this.  ”

𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑

“  don’t be so dramatic.  ” “  no guts,  no glory.  ” “  i’m calling for help.  ” “  run away with me.  ” “  it’s always been you.  ” “  some things take time.  ” “  you’re being awfully quiet.  ” “  please don’t hurt me.  ” “  snap out of it.  ” “  did you miss me?  ” “  how do i look?  ” “  i wanna get better.  ” “  whatever floats your boat.  ” “  i’ll love you always.  ” “  what are you waiting for?  ” “  at least i tried.  ” “  give me a kiss.  ” “  what’s the fucking point?  ” “  god,  i love you.  ” “  i’m doing my best.  ” “  i waited for you.  ” “  you woke me up.  ” “  stay with me tonight.  ”

𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄

“ Tohru !  ” He braces himself against the doorframe and leans around it, then throws an arm out to wave broadly to her as if she hadn’t already noticed his presence.  “ Come here, come here ! Please, I need your help deciding on something very important. ”

And with that, once his guest has removed her shoes and stepped in from the cold, he marches down the hall to his room with purpose ; once inside, he reaches for two bottles off of his shelf, and holds them out, one in each hand.

    It is not surprising to see the bottles of nail polish on his shelf, nor is it surprising to watch him reach for them, for she’s seen him wearing nail polish often enough. But it is rather amazing to see that he has a variety–Tohru supposes her mother sometimes wore nail polish herself, but they only ever had a single bottle at a time. And while her mother had sometimes asked Tohru for her opinion on colors, she’d never actually chosen a color outright. 

→     𝐈 .    GENERAL

❛   hush .   raise  a  finger  in  a  gesture  to  silence  my  muse . ❛   sit .   gesture  for  my  muse  to  sit  down . ❛   door .   hold  a  door  open  for  my  muse . ❛   tap .   tap  my  muse  on  the  shoulder  to  garner  their  attention . ❛   hunger .   give  my  muse  something  to  eat  /  drink . ❛   cook .   present  my  muse  with  home - cooked  food . ❛   brush .   work  a  brush  /  comb  through  my  muse’s  hair . ❛   read .   silently  read  a  book  alongside  my  muse . ❛   hand .   hold  out  a  hand  for  my  muse  to  take . ❛   dressed .   help  my  muse  put  on  an  article  of  clothing . ❛   note .   give  my  muse  a  note  saying :   [ content ] . ❛   amplify .   turn  up  the  music  in  the  car .

→     𝐈𝐈 .    ANGST

❛   patch .   help  my  muse  patch  up  a  wound . ❛   night terrors .   hold  my  muse  after  they  wake  up  from  a  nightmare . ❛   company .   silently  sit  with  my  muse  to  comfort  them. ❛   hospital .   my  muse  is  told  that  yours  is  in  the  hospital . ❛   revelation .   show  my  muse  evidence  of  a  lie  they  told . ❛   indulge .   find  my  muse  drinking  to  cope . ❛   downfall .   find  my  muse  collapsed  on  the  ground . ❛   console .   comfort  my  muse  as  they  cry . ❛   nurse .   give  my  muse  company  in  the  hospital .

→     𝐈𝐈 .    AFFECTIONATE

❛   wink .   wink  at  my  muse .  ❛   wrap .   wrap  an  arm  around  my  muse’s  [ shoulders  /  waist ] . ❛   caress .   gently  caress  my  muse’s  face . ❛   tousle .   mess  playfully  with  my  muse’s  hair . ❛   chest .   place  your  head  on  my  muse’s  chest .    ❛   comb .   comb  fingers  through  my  muse’s  hair . ❛   grasp .   run  to  my  muse  &  jump  into  their  arms . ❛   lean .   lean  on  my  muse’s  shoulder . ❛   tender .   kiss  my  muse  on  the  [ forehead  /  cheek  /  nose ] . ❛   abrupt .   kiss  my  muse  out  of  the  blue . ❛   chaste .   chastely  kiss  my  muse . ❛   good morning .   kiss  my  muse  the  morning  after . ❛   volumes .   gaze  at  my  muse  in  a  way  that  silently  says  ‘i love you’ .

→     𝐈𝐈𝐈 .    VIOLENT

❛   strike .   [ slap / punch ]  my muse in the face . ❛   gun .   wield  a  gun  at  my  muse . ❛   twist .   twist  my  muse’s  arm  behind  their  back . ❛   throttle .   aggressively  wrap  your  hands  around  my  muse’s  throat . ❛   parch .   burn  my  muse  with  a  hot  object . ❛   take down .   forcefully  bring  my  muse  to  the  ground . ❛   gouge .   wield  a  sharp  object  at  my  muse . ❛  shunt .   shove  my  muse  backwards . ❛  stickup .   yell  at  my  muse  to  put  their  hands  in  the  air. ❛  shoot .   [ fatally  /  non-fatally ]   shoot  my  muse . ❛  stab .   stab  my  muse with a  [ knife / other object ].

→     𝐈𝐕 .    NSFW

Momiji bites his tongue ; he’s never been particularly prone to talking back, and especially not with Hatori. Even more than that, he knows Hatori is right. Even if it wasn’t his health to be concerned over, the idea of transforming in front of others…

Now, Momiji often fails to pay this much mind - he had hugged Tohru on their visit to the school festival, and can be rather relaxed about that. Still, he can’t imagine the trouble he’d get into, and he isn’t keen to test the idea.

Hatori patting his head indicated to him that he isn’t angry - though Momiji does notice the intense, firm eye contact that precedes it.

“ Not since yesterday morning, ” he admits.  “ Have you eaten ? ”

hatori  huffs  –  something  akin  to  vague  amusement  from  the  stoic  doctor  .  leave  it  to  momiji  to  turn  the  question  around  when  he's  the  one  who  ran  off  into  the  cold  for  a  night  .  he  can’t  really  blame  the  boy  for  the  question  ,  though  ,  when  forgoing  self  -  care  is  more  or  less  his  specialty  .

come  to  think  of  it  ,  the  last  time  he  ate  was  .  .  .

without  a  word  ,  the  doctor  stands  ,  and  turns  to  face  the  exit  .

all those soft and reassuring vibes we know and love!

" it's going to be okay. "

" i can fix this. "

" come here, i got you. "

" hey... who did this to you? "

" let's get you inside, huh? "

" don't worry. i can handle this. i'll make it right. "

" you're worth so much more than that. "

" oh, honey, you're shaking... let's get you a blanket, yeah? "

" i made some tea. "

" you know, you don't have to tell me anything. you don't owe me an explanation. but if you ever want to talk... i'm here. "

" it wasn't your fault. "

" people are flawed. we make mistakes. and at some point, we're all bound to mess up and be seen as the bad guy. but the important thing to know is that while we make mistakes... we can also learn and improve from them. "

" this wasn't on you. okay? i swear. "

" listen to me. you're not a bad person. anyone says different will have to go through me. "

" i made you some dinner, if you're able for it... "

" here. you're not going anywhere in this state. i made up the spare bed; stay as long as you like. "

" nothing bad is going to happen to you. not if i can help it. "

" you're safe here. "

" i ran you a nice hot bath. that should calm your nerves a little, yeah? "

" would you like a hug? "

" nothing about what you've been through is easy. you don't need to push through anything... just rest. recover. heal. nobody is rushing you. okay? "

" look at me, look! it was a nightmare! not real, okay? you... hey... i've got you. it's alright... "

" i'm not going to let anyone hurt you. "

" here. i had some old clothes in the laundry basket, you can wear them. should be a lot comfier and cozier, yeah? "

" don't worry. i have a plan. "

" i made some cookies, if you want some? fresh out of the oven. "

" let's order in some pizza, huh? "

" listen. i'm with you. all the way. if you want to call the police, i'll dial the number. if you want to stay here, i'll cut you a key. i support you, 100%. "

" oh, love... you made a mistake. that doesn't mean you're stupid. "

" don't worry. i'm fixing this. "

" i got you a blanket. "

Guilt gnaws at him from the inside as he thinks of how he is no doubt taking time away from Hatori ( though he’s often quick to do so when he feels the man has spent too long focused on work ) and his fingers tighten around the fabric of the blanket he has been wrapped into.

He does not have an immediate answer for him — the truth is, he simply needed to get away for a while. He is an expert at masking his feelings with a smile, honed by years of practice ; but sometimes when he finds himself thinking about everything - about Momo, his mother, his father - it is then that he needs to escape, just for a little while.

“ I just needed to get out of the main house for a while, ” he admits, eyes lowered. “ And it was colder outside than I was expecting. Really; I’m okay now. ”

he  doesn’t  blame  momiji  ,  not  even  a  little  .  the  inside  of  the  sohma  household  has  a  special  way  of  wearing  on  the  psyche  .  getting  outside  for  awhile  is  therepeutic  ;  necessary  ,  even  .  it’s  just  as  necessary  to  make  your  escape  in  safe  conditions  ,  though  .  he  understands  the  boy’s  motivations  ,  but  neither  will  momiji  escape  a  stern  lecture  .

“  you  need  to  be  more  careful  ,  ”  hatori  says  calmly  .  "  i’m  not  talking  about  you  transforming  .  i  mean  your  health  .  you’re  okay  now  ,  but  this  could  have  been  much  worse  .  "

with  a  sigh  ,  hatori  kneels  in  front  of  momiji  .  he  looks  into  the  boy’s  eyes  for  a  moment  before  raising  his  hand  ,  and  patting  his  head  .

Now, Momiji often fails to pay this much mind - he had hugged Tohru on their visit to the school festival, and can be rather relaxed about that. Still, he can’t imagine the trouble he’d get into, and he isn’t keen to test the idea.

Hatori patting his head indicated to him that he isn’t angry - though Momiji does notice the intense, firm eye contact that precedes it.

@hupfen​ said :  ❛ it’s not your fault. ❜ for Hatori!

hatori  can’t  hide  the  startled  expression  on  his  face  .  he’s  just  a  child  –  he’s  just  a  child  .  momiji  shouldn’t  have  to  consider  this  situation  at  all  ,  let  alone  share  wisdom  .  let  alone  comfort  him  .  a  moment  passes  before  the  doctor  steels  himself  ,  kneels  down  to  momiji’s  level  ,  and  places  a  gentle  hand  on  his  arm  .

“  momiji  .  .  .  ”

he  feels  his  heart  clench  ,  but  remains  stoic  .  his  emotions  are  surely  irrelevant  here  –  after  all  ,  is  he  not  the  one  hurting  momiji  ?  

did  he  not  take  his  mother’s  memories  away  ?

hatori  finds  himself  unable  to  meet  the  boy’s  eyes  .

Why should Hatori be the one to bear all their burdens, their pain and their illness ? Who is there to bear his burdens ? He supposes, that is the role of the doctor, and yet he has always felt it to be unfair.

He does not miss the way Hatori avoids his gaze, either. That tells the rabbit everything he needs to know, even though it may not be shared with him aloud. 

❛ i didn’t know where else to go. ❜

❛ i’ll never be that me again. ❜

❛ you can still be good. ❜

❛ i thought you’d be here. ❜

❛ don’t act like you know me. ❜

❛ because i care about you, okay? ❜

❛ it wasn’t supposed to end like this. ❜

❛ i was scared. i thought you had lost your way. ❜

❛ am i supposed to just let you go? ❜

❛ you deserve better than me. ❜

❛ don’t make me do this. ❜

❛ i’m not who you think i am. ❜

❛ you don’t mean that. ❜

❛ please just hold me. ❜

❛ i don’t want to understand, i want you to stay. ❜

❛ and why should i care? ❜

❛ you look awful. ❜

❛ i can’t do this without you. ❜

❛ don’t let me lose you too. ❜

❛ for what it’s worth, i really am sorry. ❜

❛ it’s not your fault. ❜

❛ i don’t know who i am anymore. ❜

❛ is this the part where you kick me out? ❜

❛ don’t we deserve to be happy? ❜

❛ promise me you’ll still be here when i wake up. ❜

❛ you can’t save everyone. ❜

❛ it was a nightmare, that’s all. ❜

❛ it’s just a scratch, don’t worry. ❜

❛ you know me better than i know myself. ❜

❛ don’t go where i can’t follow. ❜

❛ you’re better off without me. ❜

❛ we all die alone. ❜

❛ people get hurt if they get too close to me. ❜

❛ i hate what i’ve become. ❜

❛ i’m not going anywhere. ❜

❛ is there anything i can do to help? ❜

❛ i don’t even recognize you anymore. ❜

❛ who did this to you? ❜

❛ please don’t leave me. ❜

❛ oh, now you care? ❜

❛ don’t come any closer! ❜

❛ i missed you so much. ❜

❛ you don’t have to say anything. ❜

❛ do you want me to leave? ❜

❛ why are you avoiding me? ❜

❛ you could have died, you know. ❜

❛ i wish you were here. ❜

❛ you’re not alone. i’m staying right here. ❜

❛ i can be your family. ❜

❛ of course i’m here. where else would i be? ❜

❛ we just can’t seem to get it right, huh? ❜

❛ don’t look at me like that. ❜

❛ don’t push me away again. ❜

❛ this wasn’t how it was supposed to go. ❜

❛ you’re leaving already? ❜

❛ this was a mistake. ❜