did you say food?

Teriyaki Chicken Lunch at Soho Hibachi Rating: 7/10 Notes: Huge portion for money paid. Chicken was chewy and overcooked :( lots of leftovers for late night munchies though. Gastrointestinal Aftermath: Stomach ache.

Pineapple Fajita (sans steak and onions) at La Fiesta Rating: 6/10 (see Gastrointestinal Aftermath) Notes: Half of a pineapple is your freakin' plate. Also, cheese and fruit is good. Not enough chicken to pineapple ratio. Gastrointestinal Aftermath: Puking, same with half my household that had the chicken.

Triple Berry Tart at 10West Rating: 7/10 Notes: Rating would be higher if I had expected the jelly in the middle to taste like the inside of a wine bottle. I am notably a lightweight. Gastrointestinal Aftermath: None.

Lobster Mac and Cheese at Fire at RiverCenter Rating: Breaks my rating scale. Notes: Wished the giant chunk of lemon weren't there. Impeded my ability to lick the bowl clean. Gastrointestinal Aftermath: Worth it.

Bangkok Chicken, mildest setting at Bangkok House. Rating: 9/10 Notes: Delightfully sweet spicy. Only complaint is that it needs more cashews on top. Will also look like a baby puked on you if you spill it on yourself. Gastrointestinal Aftermath: Ow. That is all.

Pesto and Turkey Sandwich at Tom + Chee Rating: 11/10 Notes: Would have been nice followed by a donut but that's my fault for not indulging. Gastrointestinal Aftermath: Lactose intolerants beware, it will make your belly hurt but is soooo worth it.

Pineapple Burger, sub turkey burger at Bad Wolf Burgers. Rating: 10/10 Notes: Big burger, hard to fit in mouth. Drippy. Needed to be cut, but it was worth looking like an animal eating it. Fries were *chefs kiss* magnifique. Gastrointestinal Aftermath: Slim to none.