Reply to theadamantdaughter
I was going to reblog their response to my post, but Iāve been blocked. I still think thereās value in what they said, and in the response I made, so here is the post as it would have appeared if I wasnāt blocked.
If you had concerns with certain aspects of my post it might be worth reading theadamantdaughterās concerns, but if youāre looking for a clarification of what I mean byĀ āself-insertā then just skip toĀ Zutara, self-insert and ārelationalityā.
lol that comment was mine and I think you just canāt fathom that women like certain relationships for reasons deeper than thinking the male counterpart is hot.
now, youāre trying to back pedal and claim that āself-insertingā is ābroader, and basically itās about wanting something thatās in a work of fiction for yourself.ā
wouldnāt that be applicable to all ships then? the men self-insert into kataang because they want the Nice Guy to win by getting the girl. the women self-insert into zutara because they want actual respect and autonomy. case closed.
seriously, stop trying to apply this situation to women, dude, itās insulting and belittling. by your definition, the Nice Guys/men who ship Kataang do it too.
and while most people donāt write meta, people agree with the meta. people make a decision to ship something based on what they see, such as the qualities within it that align with what they view as a healthy, dynamic, positive relationship. meta simply unpack these ideas and point them out in a clear, concise way. so deriding the argument that āpeople ship zutara for its qualities and the dynamicā by claiming ānot everyone writes meta like youā is fallible.
seriously, youāre taking statistical results and summing them up with your opinion āpeople like zutara because they self-insert, but let me change my definition of self-inserting.ā
if you want to back up your opinion that people ship zutara because they self-insert, you need to make a poll that literally asks ādo you like zutara because of these qualities? or because you think Zuko is hot?ā
Thereās some fair criticism, and some unfair criticism. I am concerned that youāve mischaracterised my position. I think the way youāve originally interpreted me makes it fair for you to be angry at me, but I donāt think youāve interpreted me correctly.
Letās start with whatās fair.
wouldnāt that be applicable to all ships then? the men self-insert into kataang because they want the Nice Guy to win by getting the girl. the women self-insert into zutara because they want actual respect and autonomy. case closed.
I have respect for you when you state the implications which I never did ā that surely the reasoning is then applicable to other ships. And I agree. The issue is the data canāt provide us with an answer. Kataang is canon so it pretty much defaults to most preferred, and there are not enough non-heterosexual males to compare data against. The reason I focus on Zutara is because itās so obviously different from the norm.
if you want to back up your opinion that people ship zutara because they self-insert, you need to make a poll that literally asks ādo you like zutara because of these qualities? or because you think Zuko is hot?ā
Yes and no. Thereās certainly reason to desire more data. Iām constantly in this state when analysing the data I do have. Iāll address the issue of āZuko is hotā at the end.
But, your question isnāt going to reveal anything. Clearly, pretty much no one will choose āZuko is hotā. I actually give an example of how we can test my theory in my post: āif you had to be in a relationship with Aang/Zuko, how would you feel?ā. And I state that my expectation is that heterosexual female Zutara shippers will be āless averseā. I donāt say that theyāre going to like it, I say that I think theyāll be āless averseā. This implies that there will be a spectrum of answers to pick from, none of which make any claims about reasons. āIād hate itā on one end and āIād love itā on the other.
meta simply unpack these ideas and point them out in a clear, concise way. so deriding the argument that āpeople ship zutara for its qualities and the dynamicā by claiming ānot everyone writes meta like youā is fallible.
Thatās a fair criticism ā of an argument I didnāt exactly make. I stated that āI think the majority of us form the opinions that we will go on to justify analytically through early and intuitive initial impressions.ā Iām emphasising the causal relationship between our opinions and metas. I think we form our opinions through some process, and then we write/read metas that justify them. Iām not disagreeing that people ship Zutara for its āqualities and the dynamicā, but I do disagree (if it is your opinion) that metas themselves are the reasons for shipping a ship.
now, youāre trying to back pedal and claim that āself-insertingā is ābroader, and basically itās about wanting something thatās in a work of fiction for yourself.ā ⦠seriously, youāre taking statistical results and summing them up with your opinion āpeople like zutara because they self-insert, but let me change my definition of self-inserting.ā
I donāt appreciate the accusation that Iām ābackpedallingā. As I state in my post, Iām ādisconnectedā from the fandom. The word self-insert has always meant how Iāve defined it. I ask that you forgive my ignorance, and not accuse me of being slimy.
you just canāt fathom that women like certain relationships for reasons deeper than thinking the male counterpart is hot
This absolutely is not what Iām saying, and Iāll address it in the final part of this post.
Midway between fair and unfair.
seriously, stop trying to apply this situation to women, dude, itās insulting and belittling.
Thereās two parts to this statement. The first is the focus of the post on females, and the second is the āinsultingā nature of the findings.
The unfortunate reality is that the data is only suitable for comparing sexualities in women. Youāll note that in any chart I make that uses āSexuality and Genderā, male sexualities arenāt shown. This is because there arenāt enough non-heterosexual males to make the results worth looking at. In comparison, the numbers of heterosexuals, bisexuals and homosexuals in females arenāt too different.
In terms of the findings being insulting, I think thatās a misunderstanding. Self-insert in its common usage is perhaps insulting, but in my usage it isnāt. I think itāll become clearer in the next part that Iām not using the data to insult women or Zutara. That said, if ever my data suggests conclusions which people would find insulting, I have no qualms with following them through to the end.
Zutara, self-insert and ārelationalityā
It seems that āself-insertā is such a charged term that even when I explicitly give my definition (and its lack of negative connotation), people are unable to leave the baggage of how they think of it behind. This is problematic for me because people then misunderstand what Iām suggesting. So Iāll use a different word ā ārelationalityā.
To clarify, relationality is being drawn closer into some aspect of a story. Itās about something being more personal.
And now, here I must stress, that when I say heterosexual females are more likely to have a relationality with Zutara, IāM NOT SAYING THAT THIS MEANS THAT āZUKO IS HOTā. I admit, maybe it wasnāt clear when I said that relationality in terms of Zutara has āsomething to do with the desirability of that romantic relationshipā. The desirability of the romantic relationship isnāt necessarily the desire of a person. I agree with you that metas reveal whatās good about a ship, but I also believe that these things are the desirable things. Ā Through metas people might dissect, articulate and explore all of these reasons for shipping Zutara, but I think we intuitively grasped them when we saw the show. The question is: why, despite having the same access to shows and metas and anything else (eg. potential to dislike a forced ending), do heterosexual females tend to prefer Zutara more than other sexualities? My reasoning is that heterosexual females are more likely to prefer Zutara because those intuitively grasped reasons about romance are more personally relevant. As heterosexuals, there is something valuable to be found in that heterosexual relationship.
Relationality isnāt necessarily some shallow lovey-dovey head over heels business. In terms of Zutara and heterosexual females, I think itās the recognition that there is something meaningful and valuable that is present in their relationship ā something which could be applied/desired in oneās own life. Itās personal, itās emotional, itās related to an individualās sexuality. I donāt believe that all females engage in relationality with Zutara to the same degree, but I find the explanation that relationality is a strong draw to Zutara for heterosexual females to be very plausible.
And so, until a better one comes along, this is the theory that Iāve adopted.