Human_potassium

Could mean good things!

Hey @evilwizard. So, you up to anything new lately?

haha it’s funny you ask

oh my god i almost forgot to tell you all about how, while my dad was visiting, i had an infestation of every single kind of bug in my house that hasn't been a problem before or since. like i'm not kidding i evicted so many creeping crawlies that week and couldn't for the life of me stop mosquitos from stealing my blood, but as soon as he left they vanished. and i mean, sure, there's a perfectly rational explanation, because two people make more mess than one and he has a habit of leaving the windows wide open enough to fly a jet engine through day and night, but i can't help but think how symbolically on the nose it was. the ancestral rot at the heart of my family so gothic it's got ants and flies buzzing around its decaying corpse.

hey so update but i haven't been harassed by a single freaky little beast since my dad left even after leaving some crumbs on the floor as an experiment to see if they attracted any ants so i think my dad might just be bugs actually

This stupid exchange between friends has become a cultural icon.

Hey what's your passive perception? . . . Uh-huh. Alright, what's your AC? . . . Uh-huh. Yeah, sorry, bro. The Dick Hitter runs out of the woods and hits you in the dick real hard. You take 2d100 bludgeoning damage.

Oh my loooord

I would love to know what the fuck has been going on in Money Supermarket’s advertising department over the last few years.

oh….my….god

It’s 4 am, I have a fever, and I’m pretty sure I just hallucinated He Man and Skeletor doing the Dirty Dancing

this is so fucking funny help

This may be the best thing I have ever seen

Omg that was awesome

I will always reblog Dirty Dancing He-Man and Skeletor.

Holy hell! My life is now complete.

This will never not be funny

All this for a price comparison website for insurance companies.

all this for a WHAT

tags by @ultramarineblues: #deeply curious about how this person discovered the cat liked this game

[Description: a looping bouncy animation of grace and Rocky from project hail mary. Grace throws himself onto rocky for a hug, smiling and nuzzling his face to the top of Rocky's xenonite covered carapace. Rocky brings a claw up to ruffle Grace's hair and grace throws himself even more on top of rocky, rocky wrapping his arms around grace. End description.]