The Good Wizard Who Lives in My Attic
When I was young, I lived in a house with an attic and a basement. I ask you to believe these previous and forthcoming lies for the sake of a story.
My parents were nice people, beloved by the community. When I was young, they took me aside and told me the family legend. We live and prosper because of the good graces of the Good Wizard Who Lives In My Attic. He is a powerful and good wizard and does not do anything bad ever, and he has forged a deal with my parents to let him stay, without killing us, as long as we all do whatever he says, and if we do, he will help us live well.
Despite my initial misgivings, I accept the presence of the Good Wizard Who Lives In my Attic. His methods are cryptic, his messages are vague, and he is made all the more mysterious because I am not allowed to bother him in his Attic, or ask if he is available to speak. I have never seen the Good Wizard, but my family insists that he is there. I accept this, because my parents wouldn't lie to me.
When I reached a certain age and I could understand the concepts of right and wrong, I was told about the Good Wizard's best friend, the Evil Goblin Who Lives in My Basement. I am told that if I do not follow the dictates of the Good Wizard, that he will abandon me and give me over to his friend, the Evil Goblin, who will do very bad things to me. I am scared of the Evil Goblin, but he too is mysterious, because the basement door is continually locked.
I lived my life working with the back and forth for many years, respecting my fear of the Evil Goblin, and working to maintain the good graces of the Good Wizard. When I reached a certain age, I found myself going off to school, despite friends of my family worrying I would lose touch with my family traditions.
When I began to speak of the Wizard and the Goblin, I encountered people who were skeptical of my claims. "Have you ever seen the Wizard, or the Goblin?" Well, no. "Then how do you know they were there?" My parents told me, and I just believed, I said. "Well, you can believe in anything. Where is your evidence? No one else seems to believe in a wizards or goblins." I had never considered that. On that day, I lost my belief in the Good Wizard and Evil Goblin, and over time began to rethink whether that Good Wizard was even good at all, if he would be so mean to let the Evil Goblin hurt me.
Feeling a bit lost without my traditions, I stumbled into a place called a church, or a synagogue, or a mosque, or a temple, I can't remember the word they used. They told me about how there was a God who lived up in the sky and did good things for people who believed in Him. This made a lot of sense to me, because I've never been to the sky. Some of them, not all, also talked about a guy called the Devil who lived under the Earth, in a pit of fire, and did bad things to people who God didn't like. This also made sense to me, because I've never been there either. It seems to me a lot of people believe in God and the Devil, a lot more than who believed in the Good Wizard or the Evil Goblin.
Lots of people accept that God and the Devil exist, and therefore they are real, even though I can't see them. People even pray to God in public and talk about how scared they are of the Devil. I think this is good, because if more people believe something, it becomes more acceptable for other people to believe in the same things, and a belief in God or the Devil is definitely a good thing, because they are obviously real, and if what they say about God is correct, he will hurt you if you don't believe!
I am glad to say that I am very happy and have found a new tradition in which to believe. I hope you all can find your way to a faith that makes sense, and that you can abandon all of your own family heresies to find the one true Lord who definitely exists! Praise God! Praise God!