just like your dad, you’ll never change

bro lemme show u how sex REALLY works *picks up large rock from forest ground*

[new to sadism] I'm gonna hurt the blood out of you

[new to masochism] no 😦

got a crick in my neck and a frog in my throat and a chip on my shoulder and a stick up my ass and now you're gonna stand there puttin words in my mouth? haven't I been through enough?

you literally have to unironically listen to some shit like party rock anthem so you don’t kill yourself

I was born in the right time. I love archive of our own and toxic old man yaoi

*introducing myself to the guards who caught me* seized to meet you

I bet crunching your little fangs into cardboard feels good as hell for a cat

going on a guilt trip do yall want anything

I did a line of dewdrops this morning

Actually I do not feel snug as a bug in a rug I feel uptight as a mite in a fight

doing petplay and gunplay at the same time im a horse with a broken leg and you have to just shoot me

[desperately trying to sexualize doing laundry] putting... my load... in the

so many mental health issues these days are due to the fact that we no longer put the gargoyles on buildings that used to scare away the evil spirits that cause mental illness