according to all known laws of aviation -

love when shakespearean tragedies imply that the audience are complicit in the protagonist's downfall/how the story unfolds

Is a story played out if no one is there to watch it?

Nothing worse than your grandparents asking if you’re bringing a boyfriend to the family’s annual deer hunt, and you getting a little ticked off bc you’ve been openly gay for the better part of a decade so you impulsively respond “no I’m bringing my girlfriend” and get a nice apologetic response but UH OH - you haven’t had anything resembling a serious date since before law school and that was like five years ago so now you have to pretend to break up with your alleged girlfriend right before the trip and act all sad about it the whole time which is definitely a much worse fate than just ignoring some vague homophobia, and now your cousins also want details and your parents are like wtf who the hell is this mystery girl, when ALL you really wanted was an excuse to quietly sit in a deer blind for a few hours in November, wrapped in blankets drinking spiked hot chocolate and pretending to look for deer.

I’m 25 and sometimes it still hits me that I can do whatever I want.

please go to the zoo if you want I’m a zoo docent and I love talking to grownups who are visiting the animals and want to know all about them.

You can buy yourself stuff in the gift shop too, if you have the money. Don’t need to ask a grownup or anything. If you want that toy gorilla it’s yours.

how dare you treat me like this dont you know im neurodivergent and *remembers i’m over 18* a major

cats when its only 7384838 hours until dinner 😭😭😭😭🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹MOWAAAAAAMEEOOOAAAWWWWOOOAAAAWWWWWWWMMEEOOAAWW

girl help they are making me do my job at work

bumbled be thy bees

thank god i'll never be 15 again

ive got to get normal > ive got to get weirder > ive got to get normal > ive got to get weirder > ive got t

"just put yourself out there" what if I scared. what then.

every social interaction i initiate feels like i’ve violated like 15 untold rules