It’s Coming,It’s Real

ruben pallister trying to make his brother who he suspects to be a closeted homosexual laugh: i finger myself sometimes and its awesome

thinking about armand again and how different his memories are from when they're perceived directly from lestat's pov in tvl and then retold by armand himself in tva. in lestat's version armand begged the brothel owners to keep him, pleaded that he'd be good, he'd do anything. marius appearing as this big, shadowy figure without a real identity, something monstrous to take him away from what was already familiar to him. and then in armand's retelling to david talbot he's the gentle father who unshackles him after having resisted for so long against the abuse in the brothel, something celestial to deliver him from his earthly sufferings. you could argue it's a continuity error from anne rice's part because she wanted to write marius/armand erotica for tva and it's impossible to do so if not even the willingness of the child is appearant in the story, but i also think it says something real about proximity and memories and what the psyche chooses to prioritize when there's no other choice. at the start of tva he already reconnected with marius, he even entrusted sybelle & benji to him. marius would've reappeared in armand's life if he'd wanted it or not, how else was he going to deal with it if not by hanging onto the most human parts of their relationship. in both versions of the story marius appears god-like. frightening in tvl, benevolent in tva. if god wants you back, there's nothing much you can do.