you've met me at a very "yeah i'm trying to work on that" time in my life
Cosmic Funnies
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h

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣

Love Begins
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
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oozey mess
Show & Tell

roma★
taylor price
Not today Justin
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@hloyf
you've met me at a very "yeah i'm trying to work on that" time in my life

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Apparently my stepdad and I are fucking psychically linked because ?? every single time he makes chili for dinner I get a migraine. Without fail. And it became like a ha ha running joke because it happened so many times but now I’m living 3 hours away from my parents and I just texted my mom and
WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME
Happy disability pride month
via @ninjahijabimuse
this is so much better i love it
don’t worry about it

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lumon's department sizes are so funny. "how many people do we need to refine some super important data?" uhhhh four i guess. at most. "what about the company marching band?" fuck ur so right. we need a company marching band with like fifty people. this is of prime importance to the lumon mission.
you arrive at work (hungry, as usual) excited for more under-tarp sex with your work husband only to find that he's not there. when you ask your boss about it he berates you. you talk to your only remaining work friend about it, but he blames you for not being able to be with his not-work wife and then kills himself. you decide to seek out the treasure map hidden by your other dead work friend. the treasure is your work husband's not-work wife, who is currently trapped in work hell. you're trying to memorize the directions in your darkened office (no work is being done). and then elon musk walks in
The Dylans' conversation: a beautiful affirmation of both of their identities as whole people as well as an acknowledgement of them being intrinsically the same person.
The Marks' conversation: No YOU kill yourself!
oh so you thought existing only to perform a soulless office job was bad. how about existing only to go to the dentist. how about existing only in planes. how about existing only to perform stupid and repetitive yet socially expected tasks. how about existing only to withstand every unpleasant thing that somebody else decided to go without
actually the reveal that there was no timeskip at all is hysterical. milchick really spent that whole weekend going all over town firing people, hiring people, putting together insane fruit baskets, and serving cunt in his motorcycle helmet. then at the orders of the board he had to very quickly fire the people he hired, rehire the people he fired, commission an oil painting for the severed floor lobby, redecorate the break room, and put together an award-winning claymation corporate apology video designed to showcase the new innie perks and reforms that don't exist as well as that one time helena eagan's innie sucked face with the innie whose outie his ex-boss is obsessed with. where is HIS waffle party

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Imagine scarfing down chinese food like a rabid animal only for jeff bezos to come and sit next to you and insult your dead wife, so you go home and get a lobotomy about it
obsessed with the Helena and Irving parallel and what it says about the aspects of our identity we think are fundamental (but aren't)...
Like Outie Irving assumes his Innie is just as radically anti-Lumon as he is. He assumes his hatred of Lumon is something ingrained in his personality! That's why he stays up at night drinking coffee and making paintings, because he hopes that when his innie dreams about the testing floor, he'll say "okay bet" and start exploring. That's what Outie Irving would do, after all. But he miscalculated! His hatred of Lumon isn't inherent--- his desire for meaning and art and spirituality is inherent. That's what his hatred for Lumon is built on. But in a world where there's no meaning outside of Lumon propaganda, of COURSE his innie would become ridiculously devoted to the company.
And Helena!! She is the corporation, that's her whole identity. She presumably assumed that Helly would be just as pro-Lumon as she is. But she miscalculated too! Her devotion to the company isn't inherent, her headstrong and entitled nature is what's inherent! And in a world where she's denied any agency whatsoever, that manifests as rebellion.
It's the same dynamic flipped on its head. They both sent their innies in there with opposite intentions--- one to take down the company, one feed the company's expansion--- only to realize that rebellion and devotion aren't inherent characteristics. Their innies have become the exact opposite of their outie selves, while still being exactly the same!! Because even though your personality is inherent, the values you hold are determined circumstantially. OUGH IT'S SO GOOD.
dude you gotta watch severance it's so exciting. in season 2 they go outside
i can’t believe this is a real thing adam scott actually said tonight at the DGA Awards while presenting with rhea seehorn
obsessed with this bookshop in stratford-upon-avon having WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE listed as a ”local author”

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Im sorry i know its bad to post screenshots of ads but unemployedprofessors.com is really getting me
Unfortunately I am not immune to surveys, whether it’s about a character, food, something the existence of which I was not aware of before reading the question, I WILL VOTE