BIG DICK IS BACK IN TOWN

they're trying to get me to do something called ""my job"" instead of reading about medieval english poaching laws

i used to understand summer preferrers i used to see where they were coming from but frankly in 2026 its just an inexcusable position to hold. you think any of this is okay? you sicko?

rosencrantz is dead guildenstern is dead and me i feel also not so good

Amazing moments in Dads: my friend’s dad’s critique of Frankenstein was, “I just don’t think the author had read science fiction before.”

*High off one pollen* Dude let's just go straight up bugshit

Loading screen tip: you can make thunderstorms arrive faster by opening the weather app every few seconds

every spelunker should go in with a cyanide tooth capsule so if they get stuck they can take the gentle way out instead of being tortured by the earth for 72 hours and then dying anyway

Sometimes my dad likes to put little pills in my food. And in those pills is more of the food.

avoidance is lowkey funny because it’s like i don’t want love on the off chance that it gets taken away from me and then i have to become john wick or something