highfemmeblues

When a princess femme meets a jester butch an angel gains its wings.

EVERYTHING is butchfemme if you’re crazy enough.

[through tears] yeah i remain whimsical

even as i become more confident about my sexual desires / sexuality i feel like it escapes & recedes from me so fast & i still fundamentally feel like there is no one in the world who would like to fuck me & that the one person who did probably regrets it & never would want to again & i also feel so stupid about feeling upset about that bc there are more important & sweet things to experience & be in the world & getting upset certainly doesn’t help make me more fuckable lol so it just feels rly bad

to say nothing of like my own continued difficultly with sexual trauma & being triggered by sex itself & then certain kinds of sex sometimes blah blah etc as well as my general & specific shame around wanting what i want or whatever it just feels awful sometimes & i wish it wouldn’t but i also feel like i dont & can’t live a life that allows me to access spaces where i might meet someone who would like to be with me in some way (& i don’t rly believe they exist ig lol) so im just totally fucking stuck

sometimes when you're having guilt about stone sex and sexuality you have to talk to your friends that aren't lesbians. as a community we have this insurmountable expectation put upon us to be the best at sex and that we all last forever and that we all munch box like we're in the line of duty and so you'll talk about stone sex to leabians sometimes and they'll be like "well it's all about the other ways you serve your partner and be vulnerable with them. when you heal from your trauma and get more feminist maybe you'l be healed and you can top/bottom again" but then like i talk to my more sexually diverse friend group and i'm so embarrassed about it and they're like "wait so this big secret is that you're a... pillow princess? ...okay?" and suddenly i have hope again for the world.