Hero Patch

Bring back illustrations in books.

I want full page art that makes me pause mid-sentence and go “oh.”

Bring back little drawings at the start of chapters. Bring back weird decorative headers. Bring back maps that are slightly confusing but I will stare at them like I’m planning a military campaign anyway.

Where is my glossary. Where is my pronunciation guide. I am tired of guessing. I want to know if I’ve been saying a name wrong for 300 pages so I can feel betrayed properly.

Give me marginalia. Give me fake documents. Letters. Diagrams that look important but are emotionally suspicious. Let the book look like it’s been handled.

Why did we decide everything had to be Just Text. Who voted for this. Show yourself-

I want footnotes that feel like the author is whispering additional lore directly into my ear. I want diagrams that explain nothing and somehow make everything worse.

Give me endpapers with art. Give me symbols that repeat until I start connecting dots like a conspiracy theorist. Give me one illustration halfway through that alters my brain chemistry permanently.

Books used to come with bonus content like they were slightly haunted objects and now we’re just… behaving? No.

If I am committing to 300 pages, I deserve enrichment.

Let the text do things. Let it shift. Let it breathe. Give me a page that’s just one line in the center so I can sit there like I’ve been personally attacked.

We have the technology. We have the printing capabilities. Why are we acting like books have to behave.

Also imagine the DRAMA. A character dies and suddenly the chapter header symbol changes. A map detail you ignored becomes relevant. A little drawing you thought was decorative is actually foreshadowing. Hello???

Anyway this is my formal petition to make books a little more unhinged again. Add the art. Add the maps. Add the weird glossary entries.