𝒔𝒖𝒓𝒆, 𝒊'𝒎 𝒅𝒆𝒄𝒆𝒏𝒕.

getting emotional over the vampire lestat premiere bc my mom loved this show and would’ve loooooved the rockstar camp of this new season :’)

i’m so homesick, but that home no longer exists. i can never go back. i can never have it again. my mom is gone. i had to watch her go. it feels like everyone wants me to be over it, to have swallowed this down already. i’m in agony. i can be fine for awhile, even for a few days. and then it will hit me that i will never ever ever see my mom again. my best friend. my favorite person. and my last few weeks with her were awful. i had to listen to her death rattle. i had to watch her take her last breaths. how can anyone ever expect me to be the same person. to care about the same things. i’m a week and a half away from my first birthday without her. everything i do moving forward will be without her. what the fuck. what the fuck

its so weird how everyone expects you to be quiet about your grief. i lost my mommy and i won’t shut up about how much i miss her. kick dirt

want my mom back. how am i supposed to go forever like this.

lost my mom tonight. feelin fucking awful lads