Sofia Carson as Ava Jalali in the pilot of Pretty Little Liars: The Perfectionists
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Sofia Carson as Ava Jalali in the pilot of Pretty Little Liars: The Perfectionists

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blvemondayâ:
Why lift a finger when Iâve got you for muscle, Missy?
Why, Jesse. If I didnât know any better, Iâd say you only kept me around as the brawn to your brain. No but seriously, do I need to kick someoneâs ass because I will.
blvemondayâ:
Forevers, huh? You know how to make a guy feel special. But go on with your story: did you chew her out? Make someone cry?
Uh yah, totally dude. Iâm always here to make you feel those special butterflies, J. As for that godawful shrew and her brainless husband, I definitely gave them one of my more familiy-friendly fuck-offs. If they ever come back with that same crap, Iâm for sure pulling out all the stops. Full parental advisory overload.
nathaniellynnâ:
Donât we all get a little crazy about our passions? Youâre forgiven this time.Â
You were in the Olympics? That is really freaking cool, sucks about not get medals but participating in general is really cool. Do you ever want to try again? I can only imagine. I never made it past high school football but they were just a little hard on us with that too.Â
Not everybody. But itâs whatever. You gonna kick my ass next time I snap on you?
I was for a minute. And since they totally screwed me over, I swore to never compete ever again. Not saying Iâm the next Riselda Selaj, but I was someone to be afraid of. I was my teamâs secret weapon. Tell me more about your failed dreams, football star.
tempestuousheinousbitchâ:
As amazing as it would be to arrange the article so the type forms a phallic image, I think Iâve figured out what Iâm going to write - âCat Memes for Pleasure: Could The Exploitation of Our Furry Friends for Humor Lead to a Resurgence in Zoophilia?â âŚI may have to shorten the title but you get my point. My editor-in-chief will love it.Â
Wicked title thatâs just begging to get you fired aside, you could never go wrong with a good dick in print. At least promise me, youâll do that thing where you leave a secret message in the article and spell out my name. I need a shout out for being your bad influence after all.

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Another former teen beauty queen lost her shit in the middle of my store because her stupid expired coupon wouldnât work, and honestly, nothing gives me more of a rush than to say no to an overprivileged white woman with too much time in her trivial existence. Weâre all going to die one day, Sharon â who gives two fucks about some overpriced soaps?
So someone brought you an expired coupon, knowing it was expired and then threw a fit because they couldnât get two dollars off of her soap? Tell me again why you didnât kick their ass.
Iâm just so glad that I dedicated four years of my life to studying journalism and going into debt just to be assigned an article about the âscientific effects of cat memesâ. Dad, I hope youâre proud of your little girl.Â
Cat memes? Seriously? Damn, theyâre really making you work for that buck, arenât they? You should definitely sneak in some bullshit facts or, like, try to set your words up so that it looks like a dick or something.
jaxxdevonâ:
I mean kids not getting spanked is a big part of it, that and most parents donât even seem to remember they have children when they are out in public and let the poor employees have to deal with them, which fuck that noise.
Nah, once a bad influence always a bad influence babe. Besides when I was a kid I wanted to grow up to be a burden on society, so you know still going strong.
Yeah, I know. Look, not that Iâm some child abuse advocate, but what ever happened to the good old days where if you were out of line, you got seriously popped? And when did parents stop raising their own kids? Granted my ârentals werenât hovering over my shoulder but my brother and I didnât get into shit or act like these brats today.
Sick. Iâve been looking for someone rad to get hang out with. No offense to Bobbi or even Jesse, but you seem like youâre more my style. Us professional rebels gotta stick together, yâknow?
blvemondayâ:
Have I ever told you that you both terrify me and excite me? Seriously, Missy, I could watch you calling people to âgrow some ballsâ for hours on end, and itâd be like music to my ears.Â
Wait, are you trying to tell me you get off on me bitching about literal fucking psychos? Cause thatâs been a goal of mine since, like, forevers.
nathaniellynnâ:
I was just asking cause if you were basically just a gymnastics babysitter then maybe not push them so hard. I have no kids and definitely not a pervy creep, chill out. But if youâre a professional and training them for like the olympics or somethings then isnât it kinda your job to be hard on them so they get better?Â
Chill out? Iâm sorry, but when I have to deal with that type of BS on a daily basis for, I donât know, the entirety of my career, I tend to not have the patience for it. Shit dude, Iâm sorry. I didnât mean that. Actually, I did but I didnât mean to snap on you. I get...crazy about my passion.
Yeah, itâs my job to push these kids or adults to their breaking point. I might not have won my own medals, but I have participated in the Olympics. Shitâs hardcore like you wouldnât believe.

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Heâs your brother, you donât see him the way I do. And thatâs a good thing because that would be a crime.
FEMALE AWESOME MEME: [8/10 females in a movie] Âť missy pantone
nathaniellynnâ:
I am going to make some guess that youâre a gymnastics teacher? But um, are you even a professional one or just one that pretty much takes kids in when their parents donât want to deal with them?Â
Okay dude I donât know what shit youâve been through where you had to give that specific ass example when it comes to gymnastics but Iâm sorry for it. As far as being a professional, Iâm the real deal. See, I donât get paid nearly enough to train these snot nosed brats let alone take them in like some glorified babysitter. What, you thinkinâ of stopping by with your offspring or are you a pervy creep trying to get his rocks off?
jaxxdevonâ:
Exactly! Itâs like those people who wanna learn how to do backflips, well you have to be willing to think youâve busted your neck a couple times.
Somethinâ like that.
Itâs this new generation, I swear. Some of these little shit kickers are so lazy and whiny itâs ridiculous. Donât even get me started on the parents.
I canât even remember the last time I scaled a fence. You still a bad influence these days or is the dream dead?

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Think I should put a sock on the door to the music room so random people stop walking in on my bands practice sessions? Youâd think the load rock music would be enough, right? Guess not. Maybe if I put a sock on it, theyâll think weâre screwing. Bet they wouldnât want to talk in on that.Â
That could work. But if weâre being real here, all thatâs gonna do is get a bunch of stoner kids banging on your door or trying to get in. Thatâs what Iâd do. What do you play?