The Galaxy's Gayest Alien

“Yeah, that whole thing was cool because I don’t know what the plan would have been if he hadn’t got knocked out. It’s supposed to be a one-off, me and Hangman. But in the little build, it was the first time we’d ever interacted really seriously. I’m sensitive to the people, whether it’s something they want to see. Me and Hang just, like, felt good.

“So we were only going to do the one-off. But I was already thinking like, ‘man, we should keep this going.’ But then he gets fucking knocked out. I don’t even think I hit him that hard. It was one of those weird things. The ref was like ‘he’s snoring.’ I’m like, ‘what the fuck?’

“Whatever. So anyway, he gets knocked out. Instantly, I’m like, ‘we have to fucking make a story out of this.’ Like, that night. I’m like, ‘well, I mean, let’s all hope that he’s okay and make sure he gets his MRI and everything. But after that, we have to go back to this.’

“I love that fucking motherfucker. He’s easy as fuck to work with. Going back-and-forth. He always brings the fucking energy when you need him to. We just kept it really simple. One of the first matches, I forced him to watch fucking Cody Garbrandt versus TJ. Dillashaw (a UFC fight). Not for any of the moves they’re doing or anything, but just for the momentum, how it goes way hard the one direction and then it just goes way hard back the other. Cody fucking knocks him down. Round two, TJ knocks him down. And then, as soon as it starts going the other direction, it just fucking goes all the way to the finish.

“I was like, ‘that’s exactly what we need to do.’ Like, fuck all this back and forth and double downs and horse shit and let the fucking people chant and everything. Like, no, fuck that. I’m going to start beating the fuck out of you. You just came back from a concussion. You’re in danger. I’m going to start beating the fuck out of you. People are going to be like, ‘oh, no.’

“And then once it flips, just fucking ride that shit all the way through until you fucking knock me out with a goddamn clothesline. And it’s over. Fuck all these wrestling formulas. Let’s make people not know what’s going to happen. And that worked out fucking perfect.

“The Texas one, by that point in the feud and working with him, I was so confident and comfortable and no worries. And I was like 100 percent certain. Like, never have I been more certain that we’re going to go out there and just fucking tear it up. And it’s going to be awesome and easy. I’ve never been more relaxed before a fucking Texas Death Match on a pay-per-view in my life. Just total confidence.

“There really wasn’t any crazy story of how any of those spots came together. It was just like by that point, we were just:

‘What do you want to do?’

‘Maybe this.’

‘Fuck, throw some of that in there.’

‘Okay.’

‘All right, well, fuck, see you out there.’

“And the cool thing about Hangman is, I like to call a lot of shit out there. And he’s totally cool with me calling something to him. He’ll be like, ‘oh, yeah, good idea.’ And he’ll just do it. He’ll ad lib. We’ll get mileage out of little shit.

“By that point, we were like a well-oiled fucking machine. So it was an easy match. I like to fucking fuck with everybody’s rhythm and time signatures and shit. Because people talk about, ‘yeah, there’s lucha libre style and like a Japanese style’ and whatever. Oh, yeah? Well, that was true years ago. Now everybody does modern, integrated, international shit. If you watch the lamest match on Monday Night Raw, they’re going to be doing head scissors and fucking power bombs and Japanese moves and shit. That was like cutting edge in the 90’s but it’s pretty ubiquitous. Pretty much everywhere, you see it. Everybody does modern moves.

“But the thing I’ve noticed is different is the timing and the pacing and the kind of rhythm of the matches and shit. WWE has a certain style. New Japan has a certain style. The cool thing about AEW is that there’s no certain house style. So you get like Penta and Fenix and Kommander. And these motherfuckers are doing pure lucha straight out of fucking Mexico City. Jim Ross was about to have a coronary the first fucking few months of the company. Because he just couldn’t understand why these motherfuckers weren’t grabbing the tag rope? It’s like, ‘they’re just doing it man.’

“And like fucking Ishii comes in. He’s doing his stuff. So it’s different psychologies. But, I like to fuck with shit. We did the shit with the brick. I remember, in the moment, I was like, ‘I’m going to roll out and grab that brick so fast and smash his fingers with a brick so quick that nobody’s going to even be able to fucking digest what they saw.’

“Which would normally go against completely against Wrestling 101. Like, you don’t want to do anything too fast because people have to be able to absorb what they see. And if you do it too fast, they won’t be able to react to it. So you want to slow everything down and play to the last seat in the audience. Play to the nosebleed seats. And so everybody can see and everything. I did the opposite— just to see what would happen.

“I’ll do that a lot of times just to play with these fucking rules that everybody says are rules and just see what happens. I could have brought out the goddamn brick and been like, ‘hey, everybody, here’s the brick.’ And they’d be like, ‘oh, no, a brick.’ And then do whatever the fucking spot we did. And then they’re like, ‘yay’ or ‘boo’, depending on who took the brick. But by that point, they’re not as shocked by the brick.

“So, I’m trying to sneak this brick out with no fanfare. I don’t even care if you notice or not. Roll out. Grab the goddamn brick. Snatch his fucking fingers. Then it’s different. It’s like, ‘what the fuck just happened? Was that a goddamn brick? Oh, my God.’ You know what I mean?

“I’m two or three steps ahead, just moving on without them. And they’re getting left in the dust, and they’re like, ‘what the fuck is going on?’ And they’re desperately trying to keep up, this match is out of control. ‘Oh, my God.’ That way, when the match is over, they’re tired, they’re exhausted, and they’re out of breath. And they’re like, ‘what the fuck was that? That wasn’t even wrestling. That was some kind of fucking horrible shit. What did I just see?’

“That’s the kind of reaction you want if you’re going to call it a death match. If I’m having some kind of crazy ass death match, I want people to be uncomfortable. I don’t want people to be like, chanting, ‘this is awesome’ and shit. I don’t want them to have time to fucking understand what I’m doing and knowing when they can pause to chant, ‘this is awesome.’

“And when it’s over, it’s like mercifully over. The key thing about death match psychology to me is that when it’s over, it’s not like, ‘yay.’ It’s like, ‘oh, my fucking God. Thank fucking God it’s over. Are they okay? What the fuck?’ It’s hard to put into words, but I’m trying to fucking freak people out.

“There’s a bunch of motherfuckers all around this business that are really good, that have great fucking physiques, they can talk and they can do a 450 and a fucking flippy doo springboard and a moonsault, and they can fucking gorilla press a motherfucker. And they know how to work and they understand how a fucking 25-minute PWG match is fucking built. When we do a double down, and when we no sell super kicks, and when we all fucking lay there so people clap for us and all that.

“There’s a bunch of those motherfuckers around and there’s a bunch of them that nobody gives a fuck about because they’re just doing, like, what they think a good wrestler is supposed to do. They’re not doing anything that’s surprising the fans, because they pattern themselves using shit fans see every fucking day. I don’t want to name anybody.

“But my favorite part of the Texas Death Match was, right around when it was starting to get nuts, a smattering of people tried to get a ‘this is awesome’ started. But they couldn’t get attention from the rest of the people because the rest of the people were, like, murmuring to each other in shock and fucking trying to figure out what was going on.