i’d say the best thing i have learned this year is to just let people be who they naturally are. no psychoanalyzing them, no overthinking my actions, no asking what i could possibly do to keep their presence in my life. i just bring my best self to the table and always move from a place of love and respect. how that person responds is ultimately up to them. if that causes them to exit my life, i just let it happen. i will never be in the business of changing people. people are only ever ready to change when they’ve made the conscious decision to. all i can do is check myself and be kind always.
this is SUCH a hard lesson to learn if you have anxious attachment problems. you’re constantly scheming to keep someone in your life, even at the expense of your mental health. i’ve been there so many times. it’s literally the most horrible feeling in the world, and it puts so much pressure on you to act the exact way you think the other person wants you to. all just so they grace you w the bare minimum. i feel so much lighter now that i literally just allow people to show who they are and let them fade out of my life organically. it’s brought me so much peace
