say my name
â pairing: bucky barnes x fem!reader â summary: during a conference, you call your boyfriend by his name and to your surprise, he isn't fond of it. â word count: 1.7k â a/n: i'm testing to see if i'm no longer shadowbanned. please share and comment if you read and see this! if you enjoy, feedback is appreciated & highly encouraged. mistakes/errors might be here, let me know if you find any.
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To you, he isn't even "Bucky". He hasn't been "Bucky" for a long time.
Ever since you two found your way to each other and you had a taste of his lips, his name changed from Bucky to love, and later to amor.
What you didn't expect was how attached he'd grown to your way of calling himâyour endearment nickname was, after all, something for just the two of you.
Sure, the other Avengers and even your boss Nick Fury himself have heard you addressing him with every lovely pet name on the book when you two are leaving or getting in the Tower, but when you're surrounded by people, you try to stick to 'Bucky'.
Apparently, that's no longer an option, no matter where you two are.
It happens between conferencesâthe Avengers are constantly busy and for that reason, a lot of your work involves preparing clear and straight-to-the-point briefings in what their next move needs to be.
You had just finished the morning briefing Nick asked you to be in charge of and was still in the conference room talking to Sam and Wanda when Bucky comes back again.
"...never seen her look so excited," Sam is saying.
You miss the beginning of it, eyes too busy trailing your boyfriend's movements, but you nod in agreement anyway. He must still be talking about Shuri.
"I asked her to send me the data of the new suit she's been talking about, I'm kinda excited for it," Wanda smiles next to you.
While sharing Wanda's excitement, you can't help but glance over at Bucky a couple more times.
"Do you think she'd add a snack compartment to my wings now that I'm Cap?" Sam muses out loud, bringing laughter out of Wanda. You smile too, but your mind has other plans. Why does Bucky look sad? "I asked Steve about it and he said she'd definitely do it."
"In what world would you stop mid-fight to have a snack?" Wanda asks between giggles.
"In my world," Sam replies with a poor impression of her accent.
Wanda rolls her eyes fondly at him, then looks back at you. "Do you hear this? He's going to stop criminals, but never in an empty stomach."
"I'd expect nothing less from him," you reply with a smile.
Sitting on the far end of the table, Bucky's impassive face has the same look as when he's trying to hold in his displeasure.
Like he's trying not to frown.
"Oh oh." Sam looks between you and Bucky. "We lost the Agent."
"That we did." Wanda gets up and tilts her head to the outside. "C'mon Wilson, let's get some food before the next one starts. Steve must've come back from therapy and food shopping already, we can go annoy him."
Sam gets up to follow her. "I love the way you think, girl."
With the door closed behind him, it's only you and Bucky in the room.
Wellâyou two and the other holograms which are on standby until the clock hits 2p.m. and the next meeting starts.
Being Nick's most valuable and trusted Agent means you're always highly aware of your surroundings. That means knowing you and your boyfriend are being heard by world leaders at the moment.
Whether they're paying attention to the silly conversations happening between the Avengers when it's not the business time or not, it's a different matter.
Usually, you keep to yourself when you're on the clock, but that could never be the case when the man you love is sitting a few steps from you looking like that.
Like a kicked puppy, or someone who saw a puppy being kicked.
"Hey," you call him. At the sound of your voice, Bucky stops fiddling with his fingers and looks up. "You okay?"
As a response, he shrugs his shoulders.
Oh, no. That's the international Bucky sign for "I am definitely not okay, but I don't know if I should say it".
You and Steve are the only ones who can pick up on his moods that easily, and all it takes is a shrug for you to put down your folders and papers and walk the distance until you're standing right next to him.
You glance around the empty room as an instinct, then prop yourself up on the desk to sit almost in front of him.
"Was it the meeting?" you ask softly.
Discussing matters of Wakanda was a delicate subject with Bucky, and the previous briefing where T'Challa and Nick were discussing the topic at hand brought up the exact reason whyâNatasha.
You two had multiple conversations about it already. Just like Steve, Bucky's relationship with the fallen Avenger had been intense and tricky, but in the end, she had been a friend.
Worry feels you that maybe Bucky's had some memories, but when he looks up at you and narrows his eyes, his answer leaves you stranded again.
"It wasn't her." So not Natasha, then. Bucky looks down at his lap again and then looks away out of the window, shaking his head at himself. "It'sâI'm being stupid. Don't worry."
As if there's a world where that could ever happen. Multiple and even infinite universes could exist, but the idea of you not caring whether Bucky's happy or not, bothered or not, is alien in every single one of them.
You lean in forward and in a rare show of affection at work, cup his face between your hands to turn him to you.
"That would never happen," you whisper to him, looking him in the eyes. I always care about you. Your happiness always matters to me.
The words you said to him multiple times are spoken with one look and when his shoulders relax, you know Bucky's heard them.
He looks back at you with so much vulnerability that it makes you forget everything else around you.
The others could come back with horns blasting and Fury could start calling your emergency codeânone of it would make you let go of his beautiful face.
Finally, after three heartbeats that feel too much like a small fraction of eternity, Bucky looks down again, smiling sadly this time. "Don't laugh, please."
"I won't," you promise. You let go of his face only to caress the soft hair that you love so much.
"Did something happen?" he finally ask. "You called me James."
Your movements in his hair stop and you freeze for a second, trying to recap the last few hours to know what he's talking about.
You had. Usually, you called all the Avengers by their coded names, slipping only sometimes.
Being Nick's right arm meant you worked from the air (and earth, and water, sometimes) to protect the Avengers while they worked the ground. After months of working together and growing closer, of course you slipped.
They were your friends now, not only Scarlet Witch and Captain America or Black Panther. They were Wanda, Sam, Steve, T'Challa. They were silly, and they were healing, and you were bound to slip.
You had called Bucky 'James' a few times today, you notice. When the presidents of the annoying Tricheta (as Nick called) were having their doubts about sending Bucky alone with Wanda to the facilities in question, you had stood up for him.
"James is more than capable of doing this with perfect scores, Mr. President. Matter-of-factly, he's the only one who can help Wanda get in there and do this properly without fucking up," you said with a smile, and the 'just like your agents had fucked up' goes unheard.
(Nick's snort and giggle do not.)
"I...yes?" You notice now what his previous question meant. 'Did something happen?' Bucky thinks you're upset at him because you called him James.
Because you used his name.
A giggle escapes you before you can think of it and his sad puppy looks turn confused, so you touch his cheeks gently once more. You promised you wouldn't laugh, but god, this man is too much. He's too soft, too caring, too genuine. And you love all of it.
"Isn't that your name, love?" you ask in a teasing tone, just to see the color rising in his cheeks.
"Not to you, it's not," he replies with a huff, sounding every bit as petty as Steve swears he can be.
"Oh, really? And what is your name?"
"Amor," he replies seriously. "It's in my birth certificate and all. Y/N's Amor."
Love. Your love.
Everything that Bucky makes you feel floods your chest and spreads through your body, and all you want is to kiss him senselessly.
"Amor." He looks up at you with a pleased smile now.
"Yes?"
"You're only my amor. Not theirs." Without care for all the protocols in check, you lean down to press your lips against his. Bucky responds with a hand to your thigh and his lips pressing back with passion. "I can't believe you," you giggle against his lips.
"Shut up," he says without any bite. He kisses you again, and your heart melts on top of the table you sit on. "I thought I had done something," he mumbles with a pout.
"If you ever do, trust me, you'll know. And not because I'm pettily calling you by the name your lovely mother gave you, but because I'll tell you."
Bucky breathes in deeply at your statement, then exhales happily, nodding at you.
"Okay." He looks around him like a kid reading to steal a cookie, then tilts his head up for another kiss. "You don't think that was stupid?"
"Not in a million years," you press a kiss to his temple and get down from the table before Nick loses his lenience wherever he is and tells you two to keep it professional. "If you ever call me Y/n and not 'babygirl' or 'babydoll', I'm suing you."
His laughter trails with you as you walk back to the head of the table to your sit, and for the entirety of the next briefing, your pleased smile and rosy cheeks are all everything can pay attention too, as well as Bucky's satisfied smirk.
It's one of the good days at work, and you have your amor to thank for it.
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