Just some guy nerding

[gently rocked while muffled yelling about being hit with a kitgun goes on in the BG ]

Don’t get me wrong, I’m really glad she’s a huge hit, it’s super exciting to see so many people love the character design and the gameplay, and know that I contributed directly and significantly to the behind-the-scenes engineering that makes it all work. It’s validating.

But it’s also so fucking melancholy to know I did so much work and put in so much time for such a shitty company, run by shitty people, and the reward I got for it was unemployment. 

I threw a lot into this character. I cried at work. I started getting panic attacks, which I’ve never gotten before. I developed persistent heart palpitations from the daily overwhelming stress and had to go to the hospital (this is true, seriously.) I basically dropped all my friends outside of work. My manager (and his manager!) lied to me constantly to keep me working. They said I was doing a great job but to keep it up. Don’t worry, it’s going to turn out great, and it’ll all be worth it in the end – recognition, a raise, probably a promotion in short order. They promised me the world. When she was finally finished, I didn’t even get to go to the release party, they just walked me out. 

I remember a quote from my last day, it sticks out in my mind: “I know you realize this is really hard for me,” my manager said. Yes, in the end, when he awkwardly informed me I didn’t have my dream job anymore – or any job at all – and then stared back at my shell-shocked face, my thousand-yard stare, the only thing he felt was sorry for himself.

She launched with no major bugs and was considered a technical success. Doesn’t matter. Get the fuck out.

Don’t wanna get reported for doxxing so I can’t directly link, but it was fairly easy to confirm his story by looking at his past posts and post archive on the wayback machine. Note that he publically linked all of his profiles through his tumblr.

His tumblr (which had existed since 2012 and mentions his work experience) linked to his linkedin,github,and now deleted Twitter, but you can still search for mentions of his username. His github links to his personal website which links back to those same github and linkedin profiles. He also used one username on every website except for tumblr.

Now, I know this is a pretty intense scene, but do you all remember that scene where Elise (Sonic 06) dies because Sonic couldn’t make it to Eggman’s airship in time before it exploded?

Link to the video: (x)

Even though this game probably isn’t canon to the Sonic timeline isn’t canon, I wanted to point out the amount of pain he felt after realizing he couldn’t save her. If Silver hadn’t suggested the option to use the Chaos Emeralds to travel back in time to prevent Elise’s death, Sonic would’ve had to live with the fact that he couldn’t protect her like he promised he would.

I also want to mention the episode in Sonic X where Sonic literally gets BEATEN UNCONSCIOUS by one of Eggman’s robots in an attempt to save Chris even though he knew he probably didn’t stand a chance at save him… BUT YET HE STILL RISKED HIS LIFE. 

Link to the video: (x)

Hell, look at the way Sonic goes back to save Tails after he got knocked down by Storm the Albatross in the Sonic Riders intro. In that game, Sonic mainly cared about being faster than Jet, but yet when it came to helping Tails, he didn’t even hesitate to do it.

The point I’m trying to make is that Sonic naturally does whatever he can to save others no matter what it takes and when he realizes that he couldn’t save someone… it tears him apart inside. 

So imagine what kind of pain he probably felt realizing there was literally nothing he could do to save his friend from being obliterated into oblivion.

This manga is a big emotional trip…