Grimace #34

I tweeted these forever ago, but the internet just noticed and I figure I should probably at least put them on my blog. I’m glad people are finding them useful.

Here they are, a mix of things learned from directors & coworkers at Pixar, listening to writers & directors talk about their craft, and via trial and error in the making of my own films.

#1: You admire a character for trying more than for their successes.

#2: You gotta keep in mind what’s interesting to you as an audience, not what’s fun to do as a writer. They can be v. different.

#3: Trying for theme is important, but you won’t see what the story is actually about til you’re at the end of it. Now rewrite.

#4: Once upon a time there was ___. Every day, ___. One day ___. Because of that, ___. Because of that, ___. Until finally ___.

#5: Simplify. Focus. Combine characters. Hop over detours. You’ll feel like you’re losing valuable stuff but it sets you free.

#6: What is your character good at, comfortable with? Throw the polar opposite at them. Challenge them. How do they deal?

#7: Come up with your ending before you figure out your middle. Seriously. Endings are hard, get yours working up front.

#8: Finish your story, let go even if it’s not perfect. In an ideal world you have both, but move on. Do better next time.

#9: When you’re stuck, make a list of what WOULDN’T happen next. Lots of times the material to get you unstuck will show up.

#10: Pull apart the stories you like. What you like in them is a part of you; you’ve got to recognize it before you can use it.

#11: Putting it on paper lets you start fixing it. If it stays in your head, a perfect idea, you’ll never share it with anyone.

#12: Discount the 1st thing that comes to mind. And the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th – get the obvious out of the way. Surprise yourself.

#13: Give your characters opinions. Passive/malleable might seem likable to you as you write, but it’s poison to the audience.

#14: Why must you tell THIS story? What’s the belief burning within you that your story feeds off of? That’s the heart of it.

#15: If you were your character, in this situation, how would you feel? Honesty lends credibility to unbelievable situations.

#16: What are the stakes? Give us reason to root for the character. What happens if they don’t succeed? Stack the odds against.

#17: No work is ever wasted. If it’s not working, let go and move on - it’ll come back around to be useful later.

#18: You have to know yourself: the difference between doing your best & fussing. Story is testing, not refining.

#19: Coincidences to get characters into trouble are great; coincidences to get them out of it are cheating.

#20: Exercise: take the building blocks of a movie you dislike. How d'you rearrange them into what you DO like?

#21: You gotta identify with your situation/characters, can’t just write ‘cool’. What would make YOU act that way?

#22: What’s the essence of your story? Most economical telling of it? If you know that, you can build out from there.

A stray dog in Bolivia joined a monastery and became a monk. The resident monks of St. Francis Monastery, named for the patron saint of animals, decided to adopt a dog they call ‘Friar Bigotón’ from the Cold Nose Project, which hopes the dog’s story will now inspire more monasteries to take in homeless pets. Source Source 2 Source 3

In the olden days, if footage was not used in a film, it was either destroyed or erased so they could reuse the reel, because it was cheaper than storing unused film.

Look at his clearly defined neck and collarbone. He’s shirtless. Compare to Thomas Jefferson on the US nickel:

or Abraham Lincoln on the penny:

Franklin D Roosevelt on the dime cuts off at his neck, so it’s entirely possible that he’s wearing a shirt but it’s just not showing.

miz: i wanna be wrestling naruto for my entrance

“THROW A POTATO”

Chase attempts a Paradise Lock on SANADA. How hard can it be?

Harder than it looks, I guess. But there’s an expert on hand! Chase consults the master.

Milano-san briefly refuses, then relents and gives into the crowd’s demand, demonstrating the move he’s known for to a determined Chase.

Okay, let’s try this again.

He still can’t figure it out. Milano? Not impressed. Liger-san also not impressed.

Chase takes a moment to contemplate what led him to this place. How has he failed so thoroughly? Is Milano-san going to have him blacklisted from the hip clubs in Tokyo? 

Chase’s mourning period gives SANADA a chance to strike, and at the end of his assault, he does what he does best:

Oh, hey, Milano-san. What do you think of this expertly done Paradise Lock?

IT’S MAGNIFICENT

Vince Staples is known for social media antics like starting a GoFundMe to get people to pay him to leave rap, but he outdid himself this time.

In the midst of the controversy over Kanye’s recent tweets, Staples tweeted, “Last summer I tried to get Ye back for the set but it was just too white in there.” We reached out to him for clarity, and he told us he was faking a relationship with Kendall Jenner to “infiltrate the family on some Rob Mazur shit.” He then told us about the ‘Saturday Spirit dinner’ he was invited to:

“First of all, I knew wasn’t nothin’ flavorful gonna be cooked at something called “Saturday Spirit,” but I was really focused on gettin’ this done for the set. Niggas don’t even realize Kanye ghetto gospel. I done played the beginning of “Dark Fantasy” at truce meetings and made real killers hug. Niggas be thinkin’ bout they mamas. So when I hear gospel shit like “Father Stretch My Hands” and realize it’s coming from a Black Trump supporter with blonde hair, it’s hella weird. I guess it makes sense but anyway…

I go in there, hug Kendall, say hi to the family. Kylie called me every other rapper that night. I think she know too many cause I never heard of none of these niggas. She took like 8 snaps with me cause she kept calling me the wrong rapper. Eventually, I finally get Kanye away from the rest of them and I’m about to start workin’ on him. But I can’t just say ‘nigga you from Chicago tighten up.’ I gotta butter it up.

“So we go to the dining room for dinner. I volunteer to say grace. I started but they’re like – wait – we have to get the cameras ready. So they get their phones out, all the women start angling for the right picture on their phones…the food getting’ cold. Rob come downstairs, get a plate then take it back upstairs. They finally get their angles. Then Kim say “1,2,3, play” and just say “that’s exactly what I mean!” and laughs. Then the whole family just starts laughing with her and they act like they were talking all along. It was hella quiet just 30 seconds ago. I’m like oh, sh*t they really faked a whole family conversation for the camera! They took one bite of the food, turned the cameras off and left the dining room.

I was like gotta go cuz. It ain’t nothin’ real goin on in there. I was hungry but then I really got scared of the food. I started thinking about that picture of James Harden with Khloe like what is in them mashed potatoes? I snuck out, took an Uber down to Roscoe’s and tried to forget about it. Just pray for Ye, cuz.”