Title? What's it need a title for?

apparently my boss who is a professor at my school doesn’t have a cell phone and his coworkers were upset by this so they bought him a childs toy phone and labeled it “David’s jitterbug” (for those of you that don’t know jitterbugs are phones made for old people that have like massive buttons and shit) so the other day I walked into his office to ask him a question and he pressed a button on it which made it start loudly playing the ABCs and he said “excuse me I have to take this” and then started singing along to the ABCs while shooing me out of his office

i, and i can’t emphasize this enough, would literally die for merlin

no offense but relearning how to enjoy things unironically is one of the best things i have ever done with my life

i wonder if my cat would get jealous if she knew how many other cats i reblogged

not to be racist but i can’t tell customers apart

The truth hurts so much, but it cannot be denied - 2 minutes after you leave my line of sight, I have no idea who you are, you’re just another arm I’ve stabbed with a needle

god I hope you work in the medical field

i eat a lot of bread because it’s soft and i deserve it. also i am gorgeous