Shinomiya Natsuki and Satsuki

So ~! Yeah, I finally get everything I needed from here (threads and info).

All drafts that I had here will be done in my new blog.

If you want the new blog I’m still stalking this post so like this and I will send an IM with the url.

“Then you better get better soon! I’ll be waiting! But don’t keep me waiting too long, okay?” Syo blushed and stared up at Natsuki. “Am I… am I allowed to give you a kiss goodbye?”

Like this if you want me to IM also follow you in my multi-muse, remember I won’t be coming back here after I finish there and yes this will be the last time I will change Natsuki’s blog to somewhere else. (I hope so)

“Thank you. If I can’t sleep next to you, it’s good to know I have at least something to make me think of you. I mean, we’ll see each other at practice sure. I-I just…” Syo mumbled and looked away. “…I get lonely when I sleep. B-But don’t you dare tell anyone!”

“I-I’m sorry. I understand. I’m just worried.” Syo sighed. Honestly, he just wanted to make Natsuki better. He’d do anything for him. “Hey, can I ask something weird? Could I… Could I borrow one of your Piyo-chans?”

“N-No. No one told me.” Did Syo really cause all this? It felt like a bad dream. He just wanted everything to go back to the way it was. “Is… Is there no way… I can take care of you? Or… am I just a problem?”

“Wait. What? You’re… switching rooms? Like… forever?” Syo let go of Natsuki and balled his hand into a fist. “This is my fault…. I wanted you to come back more than anything so we could sleep together again. But now….” Syo stared at Natsuki’s bed. Soon that bed would be empty.

“Sorry.” As Syo watched Natsuki collect his things, anxiety washed over him. He’d be alone again. Without ever realizing it, Syo grabbed Natsuki’s hand. “Do… Do you have to leave? Can you stay for the night? I-It’s okay… if you can’t….”

“I guess you have a point.” Natsuki never did worry as much as he did.

“Furious? Why? What did you do?” Or was it Satsuki that made them furious? He was always the likely culprit in these situations.

“You might not worry as much as I do, but you still do it. Hypocrite.” Syo laughed. “I know you can take care of yourself. But I still can’t help but worry. Especially after a fight. I’ll talk to the therapist Shining has on site. I promise. Maybe you should too. I wish we could help each other, but I don’t know if I’m good enough.”

“A therapist? What are you…? I-I didn’t hurt myself. I know you never liked that, so I stopped.” Syo removed his neck bandages and revealed scratches. “A cat scratched me. Which… is even less manly than the clinging. But you’re right. We owe it to Satsuki to stay healthy. He left trusting us to stay happy and healthy and support one another. We can’t let him down. And Natsuki… I’m so sorry for all I did to you. I couldn’t stop worrying about you when you left. I kept wondering, are you eating? Drinking properly? Getting enough sleep? That’s why I look so out of it.”

Was that… really how he made Natsuki feel? That wasn’t what he wanted. “I… don’t want you to feel like that. I don’t think you’re weak either. You’re strong. I… I’m… the weak one. I always cling to you and put you in harm’s way. I’m terrible. I put you in the hospital just to talk to Satsuki. I yell and say mean things without thinking how it might make you feel. I don’t want to be like that. I want to make you smile. I want to do things that’ll make you happy. And… I believe I can. Because I know now what I did wrong. Natsuki… please… please give me another chance. I know I have no right to ask it of you, but I want to prove myself to you. Even if we have to start as friends again, I’ll accept that. I just want to fix my mistakes and be the best boyfriend I can! Because I care about you so much!”

“And I hope you smile again soon.” Syo tried his best to give a smile himself. Although it was a bit twisted in pain.

He wasn’t happy, honestly telling all those feelings and thoughts did him feel terrible with himself, he didn’t want to tell all that! But he thought... that was for better, it was better if he just said those things out for once.

Syo clung to Natsuki tightly. “No! No way!” That was scary. He didn’t want that. “We’re supposed to protect each other! I want to protect you! I want to keep you safe! I love you, Natsuki! That’s why… I will protect you. I’ll do anything to make you smile. Maybe I’m being selfish. But I want to be the reason why you’re happy….”

Syo got off the couch and placed his hands on Natsuki’s cheeks. Now that Syo was so close to Natsuki, Natsuki could probably see the bandages on Syo’s arms and neck. As well as the tears in his eyes. “So… you were? Because I was worried about you…. I didn’t want you to leave. I was scared.”

Syo leaned over the arm of the couch. “S-So, you weren’t worried about me at all?! You didn’t hope I was alright every day?!” Syo dug his nails into the arm of the couch. Didn’t he love him at all? They were boyfriends…. So, why? Syo’s eyes started to burn. No. Fuck, no. Don’t you dare fucking cry.

That kinda hurt. How could he not want to see him? Wasn’t he worried at all? “Of course not.” he snapped. “Why would you wanna see someone you left in pain helpless on the ground? I could have died.”

Syo looked up when he heard the door open. There was no life in his eyes. They weren’t bright and they didn’t sparkle like they always did. He wasn’t doing much, just sitting on the couch, reading through a book. “Oh. You came back.” he said flatly.