or maybe its not about whatchu say its how u say it

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or maybe its not about whatchu say its how u say it

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i wanna get away and i wanna go far away and never come back. im tired of all of this but im not ready to give it up js yet. im in the mix of tryna to achieve and die and the same time, am i crazy? but what-so-ever im tryna get revenge as well. idk how ima go about doin it but i js hope i find my way out of it. only time i tend to beat myself up about things is all bc i think i hesitated or i thought about it too long or even knew it was comin but i threw it over my shoulder. i do that alot and ive been doin that for a while now. my mom calls me lazy and dumb and slow i dont think im any of that.
honestly, i think my mom is my biggest hater if nobody dont hate on u more in life your mom will. i promise u that, but i dont take it personal i keep calm i hold my emotions and how i feel back. but its risin slowly that lid off of that pot is about to blow but i gotta plan everything out before it does.
i dont understand y ppl feel so bad after ppl kill their selfs u aint feel bad when i needed a hug or i needed some1 to talk to.
your whole journey of suicide is like u bein a ghost and no one can see or hear u, but sum how ppl hear and see u when you’re dead..??
all i can say is alot of ppl are guilty knowin their friend killed themselfs bc they know they wasnt there that whole time mentally u js there physically.
ppl dont be caring about u they be living their life, but the only ones who rlly care can pick u out of a crowd and can tell something is rlly goin on in the inside.
i can tell on the outside that sum ppl are rlly loved and i js dont understand how’d they think of doin something like that to their self’s but yk u never rlly know what ppl be goin thru rlly
its kinda hard to think about most of the time it hurts my heart bc what if i was in that situation probably wouldve did the same thing but please can we #stopsuicide?