pepis room

god's sleepiest little faggot

oh, no, you misunderstand me. those were my monkeys. yeah the circus and i have since parted ways. yeah it was the elephant thing, i dont really want to address that right now though

I’m soooooo embarrassed. My lord told me “good night,” but I thought he was calling me a good knight, and, well, you could hear it clink against my codpiece.

must feel so good to be soil absorbing rain

We genuinely need to kill and eat anyone who likes music

“You can’t fix him” I don’t wanna fix him! I wanna FUCK him! I’m a pervert not a psychologist!

"they've had intercourse" "i know that i'm asking if they've kissed"

It's interesting how, culturally, we've gone from workplace comedy (The Office) to workplace existential dread (Backrooms and Severance). Can't imagine why.

youre pissing me off

call me crazy but i think public transportation should explicitly also be for actively drunk/high people. so they don’t, you know, drive under the influence.

do not start gambling. go outside and locate a bug. now post it on inaturalist. bam. nature's gacha game