if you’re american and coming to australia, I’m gonna go ahead and say that you should be 100 percent way more worried about being king hit by a dude named “dane” in a bintang singlet than any fucking spiders that exist here

what does this say in english

“Good sir, if you are a resident of the United States of America and coming to visit the sunny land of Australia, allow me to inform you that you should be rather more concerned about being sucker punched by a gentleman named ‘Dane’ who is likely to be seen wearing a wifebeater with a beer company logo on it than by any of the dangerous spiders that exist on this lovely continent”.

ok so what does it say in american

“You’re more likely to get sucker punched/cold-cocked by an asshole than you are to be bitten by a spider”.

thank you

Well rattle my spoons, that don’t make a lick of sense. Wot in tarnation does this hootenanny say?

“If ya mosey on by Australia, you best be fixin’ to get to some fisticuffs more'n checkin fer spiders.”

This is a Rosetta Stone for a single language

Mood. -V

I loved this!

Omg🤣

Next time you go walking around barefoot in the water…

NOPE

No worries, that’s a Bobbit Worm. They live on the ocean floor, and unless you’re able to withstand a ton of pressure, you likely wouldn’t have your toesies nipped off by one since they live deeper than people walk on the ocean floor. Bobbit Worms are kinda cool. And they were named after Laurena Bobbit, who cut off her abusive husband’s penis and threw it out of her car window as she drove off.

Wait.

Incatnito

“call out for the god of wealth, he’s never given me 300 silver coins because he’s mean” —Hipponax of Ephesos, sixth century BC

“hold my jacket i’m about to fight Boupalos” —also Hipponax of Ephesos

6th century BC Twitter

The song hallelujah always makes me cry but it also makes me think of Shrek???

Direct action

The other day I read an interview with Björn Ulvaeus where he said that the reason they changed the pronouns for When I Kissed the Teacher in Mamma Mia 2 was because they didn’t want to have to write a key change for the Vice Chancellor’s part. And I kind of love that? “I’m tired, let’s just make it gay” for some reason is so much more satisfying than forced queerness as a way to be ~Modern And Edgy~.

@doitwithfliehr !!!!!

kittens are so fucking stupid & i love them

thats not stupid, that’s The Dream