nothing but raw emotions

And, until then, please don't feel like you were left behind. You are not. It's okay to feel your own solace. To find peace with yourself and to sometimes wonder for your season to bloom. Just be reminded that you don't have to be scared to bare your heart. However, choose only those who see the real you and those who listen to your soul. Don't be scared to put yourself out there. After all, you wouldn't know 'who' unless you try and meet other people.

Let yourself appreciate all your silent battles. And let yourself heal the way the world wants you to. The world is bigger than us, than the problems we have, than the emotions we feel and the tears we shed. So, don't forget that among this planet, or the stars, we are one of those little things that bloom the brightest at every dark.

I'm proud of you. You don't need any validation from anyone or anything to be proud of you. Don't be discouraged with the mistakes you have taken, thus, learn from the lessons of it. You'll be wiser, braver, and resillent to more of mistakes you'll encounter. Know that I understand your frustrations, I understand the sadness of what you imagined could have happen if not for the mistakes. But, I want you to know that you don't have to be sorry for the things that has already happened, it will soon pass and greater things will come and succumb to the natures of you that learned from it. More doors will come open so close what has been in the past.

I was looking at you and I see your eyes reflect from the years worth of pain you are trying so hard to hide. I can see how you lift your lips trying to form a smile, and I know you are tired. You can always cry, be sad. You can always go to those who sparks your light brigther. And just like that, when I see you smile I remember the carefree you full of warmth. You look a lot like how you used to smile back then. I wish you would wear that smile often as it suits you better. I'm wishing you luck little one. I love you and I'm always rooting for you. You can do it!

~🌷🌷🌷🌷

Hi. How've you been. I hope you're doing okay for the past months. I've never heard from you for so long. I wonder if you still remember how to smile without worries. Or laugh without crying. I hope you're doing fine despite trying to figure things out yourself. I know it's been so hard but I'm proud of you. Sometimes I do miss the carefree version of you. Because right know, I know deep inside you felt lonely. I hope you'd regain yourself again and be passionate to the things you loved doing. I hope you'd be hopeful again amidst every "despite."

I sometimes wonder if it's normal. To just be contented on your own company. The kind of peace you make when you are with yourself. And I also wonder how true could it make you feel to spend your alone-moments with your fated one. Is there really no such thing as coincidence? Perhaps. Because every person weavers your story with their roles to play. But I'm scared for that what if, the what if I'd confuse you as a passing character that I actually losed my chances. Weirder it may sound, I know when I met you that you're the one. And I am sorry it has to be me who'll break it to you. Just know that I don't hate you. I just don't like you, atleast not the way you want me to.

So don't settle for just good, settle for what you deserve best.

Life is a passing series of moments, have ups and downs, highs and lows but all of it will be worth it. So hey, don't give up okay? Baby steps, little steps, it is still a step. And in time, God will make a way for you to reach your moment and it's going to be worth it.

I guess being stuck in an island was not a bad idea after all. Away from the busy city, away from the loud crowd, away from nothing but problems until being stuck in an island for a year, you'll realize it was the worst idea of all. I once thought that maybe it was fine to be bad sometimes, hurt them before they can hurt you, and let no one get close to you so they cannot harm you anymore, sometimes you'll think that this world is tiresome, but it just made me realize that it is not them that I fear but the feeling of being ALONE is what I fear. I guess I am human after all. It was the fear of not being loved. It was the fear of not being accepted. It was all the fear that consumes one, and it is living of fear that makes one regret in this one lifetime we have.

©Movie: Set It Up

It's only been a year but it felt like forever since the day I realized that the best days of my life were right before my eyes. I kept playing the broken tape, repeating all those memories when I used to complain about things I am now missing. It was a bitter sweet moments indeed and I can't help but curl myself in the middle of the night smiling and tearing watching the broken tape in my head. I wish I could fix these and able to untangle the broken pieces so I could continue making new set of tapes. And I will keep wishing to find that play button hoping that the tape wouldn't just stop there. We can still create our new set of tapes. So don't give up trying. Don't give up on yourself now, not after everything you have been through.

I love you now but I don't know you yet. Have you ever have this feeling that someday, you'll find that someone who God prepared for you. It was magical to even imagine but I hope I'll get to meet you someday so I can love you just as how I love God. And we'll grow together with God as the center of our relationship. Many times I ask, when can I meet you? Or how will I know if it's you? I was always scared to open up romantically to someone. I just hope you have courage to even approach me. Or I have the courage. But I will leave it all to Him. I know someday, God will make way, and by that time, I hope I will be someone who can give fully herself and wholeheartedly to you. I pray that He let's us grow for now so we can be ready for each other. Let yourself grow, love. 'Til we meet in God's plan and perfect time.

It was dark behind those four-cornered closed doors. No light was passing through and somewhat nothing but pure sadness engulfs everywhere. It was lonely dancing alone, playing the song of painful memories. Time carry on when it was tiring to continue dancing but it was an overwhelming feeling to step up behind those closed doors. The anticipation of looking forward to what awaits was another thing to deal. It was new and unexpecting but it was real. Until you'll realize it was a good feeling. Opening those close doors seemed to be the best decision because sharing this champaign problems was a lot more weight-off than to carry it all alone. You'll realize that hope was better than to drown with worries.