I don't even know what to say. I have a 10 page paper I have to write, an exam tomorrow, and a homework assignment I have to catch up on that was SO incredibly hard. Then, in that same class I have another homework assignment due on Friday. Idk if I'm gonna pass one of my classes and I'm trying to hard to just fucking finish this godDAMN degree. I want to quit and give up so bad.
I was feeling suicidal a couple weeks ago, but I know it wasn't a real suicidal urge, and I know it's just because of school. I know that if I were to remove school from the equation, my will to live will return. I just want to garden, play guitar, play my records, and drink libations. I want to hang out with my cat and have date nights with my wife. I want to cook for her and feel like a good partner instead of sitting on the couch doing homework.