gotta be one of my favourite genders

"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

the cliche 2012 era ff.net "lucy gets kicked out of team natsu" fics are hilarious for a lot of reasons but mostly because. lucy couldn't get rid of those mfs if she tried. they're in her house. they're following her on jobs that pay like a 100 jewels. they thought she left them and freaked the fuck out and followed her across the country. they basically imprinted on her like 3 annoying, highly destructive baby ducklings. be serious.

i'm so tired of social media users saying "successful people are abusing stimulants". unsuccessful people are too. #WEMATTER

no weapon formed against my sweeties will prosper

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

Blue Lois

can i help you

Red Marge

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

World Heritage Post

i deserve a medal for this post. not because i was particularly funny but because i survived an onslaught of nearly one hundred gimmick blogs in the wake of this post popping off, and the fact that i didn’t try to track any of them down and snuff them out with my bare hands is a testament to my immeasurable strength and should be rewarded. at one point i had “the official letter h” add on to this post. you wanna know that blog’s gimmick? the really funny and original and worthwhile gimmick the official letter h blog had? yep you guessed it they just gave me the god damned letter H and then fucked off. only jesus knows the suffering i endured over that harsh winter, and he wept for me