Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

Product Placement
Peter Solarz
Keni
Jules of Nature

Andulka
wallacepolsom
taylor price
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

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sheepfilms
Three Goblin Art
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
almost home
cherry valley forever
Cosimo Galluzzi
h
official daine visual archive

JVL

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@galactic-doritos

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thought it was a one-off thing, but i've now seen multiple pictures and videos of red-bellied woodpeckers touching other birds with their tongue at bird feeders. why are they suck little freaks?
why are you like this?
Is and continues to be my favorite dance video. Dude’s so unexpectedly fluid.
> High score! What happened? Did i break it?
> You don’t see too many YouTube videos from 2005..
Weird to think that was almost a 10 years ago.
Hey kid you want a job?
Great get online and go to a job board. Indeed, Linkedin whatever. Now you're gonna search for a role that's in your city, fits your qualifications, and doesn't seem like a bad time.
See that easy apply button? Don't hit it they just throw those in the trash. Now you're gonna want to go to the company's website and check their careers page.
Oh? That job doesn't exist anymore. Cool go back to the job board and find another one.
Great you found another job, you're on the company's career page and the job exists!! So you're going to need to make an account on the career page website. They're using Workday, the same site as the last job you applied for? Who cares? You need to make another account for THIS job's workday page.
Now you're going to upload your resume. That'll autopopulate about 15 boxes with everything on your resume, except formatted wrong and with tons of errors. So just go through and painstakingly check the dates on all of that and rewrite everything you already laid out in an aesthetically pleasing format on your resume.
Ok time for the cover letter, explain why this specific job and company are deeply important to you. You love their mission statement and wouldn't even laugh if their ceo was gunned down in the street. You'll really want to reiterate the things you just spent the last 20 minutes filling out on the resume section
(Remember to include language from the job description, people who work in HR are lower than dogs and they need patterns or they get confused.) Write about a page, but hey don't sound too desperate or robotic this is where they judge your character!
Maybe add your portfolio site at the end here, who knows if that helps no one has ever clicked mine haha.
Anywayyy time to hit apply! Congrats! You'll see that confirmation email come in and you should be getting the rejection letter in about 2 weeks. Unfortunately your resume didn't have the right buzzwords and the AI auto rejected you :(
Time to start again and try not to kill yourself!
Listen to me
Listen very closely
The above is exactly why half of my friends come to me, and cry they're suffering, and I get to bestow my job hunting knowledge on them. I love this shit, it's a game.
For credentials my fastest job hunting time has been 1 week. I searched for 1 week, got an interview, and was hired within a week. My slowest was 1 month, while out of work, while telling ALL my interviewers that I quit my work without notice (I was testing my interviewers to see how shocked they'd get when I'd tell them why, anyone who wasn't shocked I would tell them at the end that I will keep them in mind (not)). My entire average is 2-3 weeks.
Firstly, what you're gunna do is pick a job sector. You're gunna pick a few of these by the end, but for now pick one. Maybe you wanna do bookkeeping, maybe you wanna do something in doggy daycare. Maybe you're a sous chef. Idk! Figure out what abouts you want first. Do not apply to anything yet. You're gunna look at the job description, I've picked out a few for bookkeepers below.
Now what you're gunna do is you're gunna look for "buzz words", or rather words that are gunna appear commonly and indicate the tone for that job. I've highlighted some, but not all in my examples below
Just look at that snout at how similar those descriptions are!
Now that you've got your buzzwords, you're gunna slap those babies into your resume! You see, since your resume is usually read by a computer first, you're gunna trick the computer into giving it to a person. Really what the computer is scanning for is how similar your resume is to the job description. Remember your bullet points, and to keep it short, try to only have 3 to 5 bullet points per job:
- Processed over 500 invoices a day in an efficient and accurate manner
- Curated reports for management review by utilizing available data
- Monitored and recorded over 100 submissions each day increasing accuracy by 50%
These are some great, made up examples I pulled from those buzz words. You might notice I added some numbers into there. That's something you'll wanna try and note for yourself, how much of something you can do, how accurate, how much efficiency you increased, these look GREAT when your resume gets past the computer and is moved in front of a real person.
Now you have your sector-based resume with lots of buzzwords. This is great! Now for the easy part. You're gunna channel your inner "IDGAF" And you're gunna send that to every listing you like on indeed. Filter for "Apply on Indeed" and spam that shit. Sometimes you gotta answer a few extra questions, but if they give me more than 5 quick questions I trash the submission and move on.
Don't waste your time jumping through hoops, streamline it for yourself and use the same methods companies are using. Push MASSIVE amounts of average quality resumes out. The more opportunities taken = the greater the chance of success. For every opportunity taken you've now pitched a chance of success, for every resume you cannot submit because you're piddling around on their stupid website or answering 50 interview questions online, you send out a 0% chance of success.
So go, try this, and see how it works for you.
Some additional things to consider:
- Add random shit in your resume, I added my "Board Game Club" (BDSM group) into my resume for hobbies and discussed how I got my start using sparklines there
- Never underestimate the flair of a little Clipart fleur-de-lis or something on your resume. Never put colored Clipart, but a little floral or swirl design located somewhere nice makes it stand out
- if you don't have a degree that doesn't mean they won't pick you, twice now I've come to a job without a bachelors and being honest that I was only getting an associates before I think of my next steps
- Embellish, do not lie. Jargoning your job description to make it sound cool and professional is GREAT. Do not give me a resume saying you can use CNC machinery when you've only used a 3D printer. Just tell me you know how to program and manage a 3d printer and want to learn CNC machinery.
- Keep. Your. Resume. To. Two. Or. Less. Pages. You don't need EVERY job, only the relevant ones, if your interviewer asks about the gap, tell them what job you had during that time (or if you wanna lie say you were taking college courses and were on a break, you dont need a degree to say you took courses) and that you only wanted to showcase the most relevant ones
- I'm serious on that last one I'll eat your fucking resume
As the bird flu virus moved into cows and people, sluggish federal action, deference to industry and neglect for worker safety put the count
link to an article from scientific american on bird flu, not sure if it is the one referenced
Far more bird flu damage is inevitable, but the extent of it will be left to the Trump administration and Mother Nature.
now there's a fun sentence
@vague-humanoid @vaspider
Btw for those of you who aren’t in the know, we doctors here in the US just got a nice little note from the CDC this past week basically saying anyone testing positive flu A should have reflex testing to H5N1 (bird flu). They know it’s in the population. This quadruple season of COVID, Flu, RSV and Norovirus is hitting very hard and now the ICUs are filling up with flu patients but guess. what. administration. Just stopped all external communications?! Girls. Wear a fucking mask. Bird flu is likely in the population and the current US government does not give a shit and wants to watch us all die.

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me, appreciating all the hard work that goes into creating video game environments:
ill spend my twenties investigating the healing properties of salt i dont know about you guys
excuse me
Sorry op. That's my friend the Salt Vampire from the Star Trek episode "The Man Trap" which first aired in 1966. Blessings be upon you.
its just i dont feel blessed by its presence is all. sending love your way
The #AllLivesMatter degenerates love the two-tier style of justice and complete disregard for children.

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you’re sitting across from me in a shitty diner in anywhere, america, and i watch you pour too much creamer in your coffee and i think “i love you.” you look up, catching me staring, and for a moment i think i’m brave enough to say it, but i take too long and the moment passes. i take the balled up straw wraper and flick it at you, pretending that was my plan all along. you laugh. i never want to go another day without hearing that laugh. i think i will have all the time in the world to say it.
op are you okay
yes im married to her now
this is the kind of quality content I expect from the internet

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to anyone in the areas impacted by the wildfire smoke, my #1 biggest piece of advice as someone whos been dealing with wildfire smoke in the NW united states for years, is build yourself a Corsi-Rosenthal Cube
they perform as well as expensive HEPA air cleaners, and are comparatively VERY inexpensive. all you need is a box fan, 4 air filters, a piece of cardboard, and some duct tape!!!!
i think it took us maybe a half hour to put ours together, if that, and we replace the filters every 3 months. it's really made a HUGE difference, both when the air quality is bad, but also with our allergies
Saw these easy to read instructions on Twitter. Stay safe 💚
people on TikTok don’t realize fic binding didn’t begin with idiots selling mass printed fanfiction on TikTok-Shop. They think it started as a negative thing ON TIKTOK😭it started on tumblr years ago as a way to appreciate authors!! It was never about selling fics, we’re AGAINST THAT HERE and always have been. I am so tired of the way TikTok rewrites fandom culture.
Hi there,
I don't think it's overstating to say that I'm the person who first popularized fanbinding on Tumblr. I began binding fic in September 2018. It was and is an exciting, novel way to participate in the traditional fannish gift economy. You do it with your own two hands, and you have the chance to make an extravagant gift to authors whose often very personal work means so much to you. In the process you have many opportunities to create close personal connections within fandom.
Because there are so many wonderful fics out there, one person could never give them all the love and recognition they deserve. I really wanted to see the practice grow beyond myself. I wrote a detailed manual of my process and offered it up for free so other people could join in. In the years since, Renegade Bookbinding Guild has arisen, always as a team collaborative effort, and it's remained a community focused phenomenon that explicitly supports open knowledge sharing without fees, deep respect for fic authors, and fosters more practice of that gift economy. You, dear reader, are welcome to join us in this project. We have bound thousands of books at this point, and every day more books are born.
I'm not on TikTok, but I've been linked to a lot of misinformation being posted on it over the last few years. I've also heard about a lot of profiteering going on, taking advantage of the hard creative work other fans have freely offered to feed our souls. Speaking only for myself, I think it's a damn shame that some are so quick to commodify the work of other fans. Gifts should beget gifts, not grifts.
When we treat fanworks as free "content" from faceless sources, to suck down voraciously and demand more, or make a quick buck off, the supply will start to dry up. Fanworks are labors of love, but they are still a lot of labor. The energy that keeps folks engaged and creating is essentially a feedback loop. Many authors and other creators are spurred onward to make more, write another chapter, draw another porny picture, bind another book, simply because of the sheer joy they see that their act of creation gives to other fans. I see the Renegade philosophy as helping to supply that energy back into the system. Fic authors deserve that we respect their works as their own, and that fic you love that they spent so long writing deserves every bit of fawning, gibbering, ranting, sighing, rec listing, and sometimes binding, that we fic readers might offer it in return.
ArmoredSuperHeavy, Dead Dove Publishing 2024.11.26
"Gifts should beget gifts, not grifts"