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Your friendships will continue to fall apart until you learn to stop expecting things from people who are not what you’ve pictured them to be in your mind.

If you’re an introvert and someone who values deep connections or intellect, don’t expect extroverts to have the same level of introspection and hobbies as you. If you like to dress and carry yourself in a dignified, feminine, and outstanding manner, don’t expect people with different personalities and self-concepts to mirror your appearance and feel the same desire to put forward a polished image of themselves. If you have certain values you won’t compromise on, don’t expect those with different beliefs to honor them back to you as well.

Only by learning to see others for who they truly are and not who you wish they’d be, and based on that information choosing to either keep them or simply move on, will you be able to find peace with the people you are with. We are not meant to be compatible with everyone, and THAT IS OK. Understanding this doesn’t make you or the other person inherently bad. If someone is not for you, there will be others who will be.

The less you speak, and the more conviction, authority, and calculation your words have when you do and increases the value of what you have to say and your outer persona. The more you speak, the less your words are valued and the more you make yourself vulnerable to others.

This is something I'm practicing. Every thought that comes across our heads is not supposed to be vocalized. We should be curating what we say carefully and be strategic with our words. The power of life and death lies on the tongue, and a well-trained and sharp tongue can be a powerful weapon when utilized correctly.

From now on, every time I feel like oversharing, giving an opinion on a controversial subject, or about someone directly, I assess the situation and how my speaking my thoughts can affect my proximity to whatever I'm trying to achieve. It's all about being strategic.

Once you've mastered the art of detachment from the perception of others and lower your expectations of people who haven't made any pledge of commitment towards you, it will become easier to develop a thicker skin, to become more laser-focused on you and your own well-being, and to disregard that and those who do you no good.

BENICIO DEL TORO