Für Die Seele

Unlearn. Unlearn.

How am I supposed to feel?? How DO I feel? I am struggling. Struggling.

You are my hope.

SundaZe. https://www.instagram.com/p/COWkYU6gifmDkw0Tt5yngHdJAC0yox6DVsHLrA0/?igshid=ou231umljatz

🐳 https://www.instagram.com/p/CMrBaR6geuPdKIMtlSkNeX888YPCA9WM1A0WuM0/?igshid=b29bmao0hvpz

It's my face. https://www.instagram.com/p/CMgLl8gAQDeaQ3iQOSjoiulDlnGRd7wFvb_P_40/?igshid=10jpt62inrkff

What is it like to feel as if the body you're in, is "you"? What is identity to you? Yesterday I finally fed the beast within and got more piercings. Yesterday I finally felt one step closer to "me". Ever since I was diagnosed with BDD, I have been trying to come to terms with it as a mental illness and not just as something that is "normal/okay". BDD causes me to do things like periodically starve myself, pick at every little thing on my face (causing scarring), and sometimes just to look myself in the mirror and hate what I see - to the point where I just say horrible things and see a stranger staring back. Body modifications help me feel like I am regaining control over my physical self. They help me feel like I am in the body I want to be in. It isn't just aesthetics for me, it's outward self-expression of the "me" inside. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, because they don't have to live in your body and feel like "this is not me, I am not happy". #bddawareness #bdd #piercings #philtrumpiercing #nostrilpiercing https://www.instagram.com/p/CLf26UyABTbH60lS2XUfa0-y8zKauwKtN0Vovs0/?igshid=14dtxshd1xnw0

My first vegetarian lasagna 😁 https://www.instagram.com/p/CK-4K0FAh1YxO6GJQ4HDrMtpeuRTHxBpBa3D2g0/?igshid=160w945eps56n

I came here to clear my mind. I wished for the ocean to take the thoughts away, but the waves washed them back to shore. I called to the wind to lift the weight away, but I only grew cold. I looked to the sun for a light to guide the way, but it set. I drove out into the darkness but the moon brought me home. (at Trenerry Reserve) https://www.instagram.com/p/CKJO42-AdU651HBn3nCTTBdz3HG3HioUesuHIY0/?igshid=dgalnr3akmx4

I love my big Sissa 💜 She supports me in everything I do, and is always there to give me shelter from the storm ⛈️ #sheproteccsheattaccbutmostimportantlyshegotyourbacc https://www.instagram.com/p/CIN21_vgVw4KO8qSI_E4z_yuEMh2N8w-DJ8KNo0/?igshid=ft4i9demausz

Today's look is just such a vibe 🔥 #ootd #sydney https://www.instagram.com/p/CIHYaQBAinBfXH_aGBw1D26jn_kPTNU18VFqcs0/?igshid=msbits4s724q

Crazy to see how much my wee babs have all grown this year. Remember that sometimes you might feel like things are constantly the same and you're not getting anywhere, but as time goes by -you are still growing-. https://www.instagram.com/p/CHl6fflAFrsgi4NHsiwECR7ZpwvWRux4lfPb3o0/?igshid=7f4nsfsyhliy

🍋Sliced 🥧 https://www.instagram.com/p/CHhM2zWAWs6bXoa0BdZkJ_pcTe1JuUh1y3uM4o0/?igshid=1n4jqw2k5y0yt

🍋Lemon meringue pie 🥧 #lemonmeringuepie #lemon #meringue #pie #homemade #fromscratch #baking #withlove #whenlifegivesyoulemons https://www.instagram.com/p/CHesdz7AUBot4Pm37V0Y1DrkmL885zAFx-kh0o0/?igshid=17n6qtplqlaeq

💧🌿 https://www.instagram.com/p/CHOuMp9AMogITvJU0A5DzTgVb-Axhsdsue3b5Y0/?igshid=1hgqi8jzapzbe