faith, trust, and pixie dust

You are an assassin. A little girl has just come up to you, handed you all her pocket money and asked you to kill her abusive relative.

Plot twist: You give her back her money and kill that asshole for free

Deadpool (2016)

Everyone in naruto: hold on stop fighting a minute I think my backstory might be sadder than yours

hot take: moms need to learn how to listen to and comfort their daughters without making everything about their own traumas

everytime I hear about children of the corn I think about the guy I met at comic con who actually lived in the town they filmed that movie at, and on the farm where they filmed in the corn. he was a teenager at the time and him and his friends would get drunk on moonshine and rustle the corn and let the air out of the tires of the production team’s trailers and shit. and now there’s Wikipedia pages about how the children of the corn set was haunted and they thought they angered god but it was really just drunk hillbillies

I don’t like adding to posts but I also have a funny story like this, so I was watching the movie the Blair witch which takes place in burkettsville maryland, which to me is so funny because that is were my grandfather lives and the town is literally just old people and cows with their main street consisting of a post office. Well anyway he told me that after it came out people were coming in like bus loads to the town to find the witch and my grandfather lives up in the Mountain area and people were up in his property trying to find the witch and it made him angry so he went out and hung up stick people and stacked rocks and it freaked the people out so they started thinking something was out there when really it was my 80 year old Italian grandpa who wanted people out of his woods.

We had ghost hunters come to a historic house in my town to film and if you think every high school kid in town respectfully stayed at home that night instead of going to fuck up that filming you’re dead wrong.

this is comforting, actually, sometimes paranormal things are just a bunch of bored people dicking around in the woods.

New favorite cryptid: locals

not to be controversial but the feeling of being so thoroughly sleepy that you know you’re gonna pass out the second you get curled up in bed? unsurpassed, baby

when my dog sleeps all day long it’s “cute” but when i do i have “clinical depression” and am “isolating myself from society”

If the devil has a pitchfork and the grim reaper has a scythe, is agriculture a major industry in the underworld?

Thanks to Persephone it is

my blog will make you smile

my blog will make you smile

i think drinking a fuckton of water out of your hands from the sink is in the same class of primal urges as running up stairs on all fours