Sade Olutola
DEAR READER
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Andulka
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trying on a metaphor
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Not today Justin
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@forceordered
JOHN BOYEGA // have you met FINN yet? HE/THEY is now a TWENTY-SIX years old DEMIMAN HUMAN, originally from UNKNOWN but typically reside on MARA'S SHIP, THE JADE FIRE. after everything they’ve gone through, they show loyalty to THE UNALIGNED. they are best known for being a FORMER STORMTROOPER / FORCE SENSITIVE, and i hear they’re grown pretty COMPASSIONATE yet also CONFLICT-AVERSE at times; i hope they survive the galactic war.
L O A D I N G : // … 8ABY : MONTH TWO … //
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@forceordered
“so how long are you docked for?” Milla was enjoying a puzzle in the shadow of the thane’s ship, but she saw a smuggling ship coming in to dock beside them and called out when a person emerged. “unless you’re not allowed to say.” she wasn’t sure if she was allowed to say. not like she knew.
her question scares him, an unexpected company and unexpected query. he didn’t recognize the ship she stood near, the one they’d docked by - but that wasn’t unexpected. the best smugglers weren’t recognizable by their ships . . . although, by her attitude, they weren’t sure she was a smuggler. “oh!” he turns, hands in pockets, ensuring his jacket remains covering the saber hilt clipped horizontally to his belt. “not long. just getting supplies.”
“You will survive. It will hurt, but you will live.”
they try their best to smile, a brief flash of forced happiness directed more at her comfort than his. “yeah.” he responds, not meeting rey’s eyes, instead gazing at a spot behind her shoulder. “i’ve heard that a lot lately.” doesn’t mean it’s true.
“You will survive. It will hurt, but you will live.” – zarafet/fee
their head drops into his hands, not making eye contact nor letting fee see the emotions flickering across his face. “i know.” the response is simple, vastly understated, more out of avoidance rather than truth. the last few months had been an utter whirlwind, with first aiya’s death, the massacre on hapes, then his desertion - and reconnecting with many of those who had known him from a time and place he had no memory from.
++ @nightsfirst
📜
hux: i went through an entire character arc during quarantine
hux: i became more evil if you’re curious
finn: we’re still in quarantine, don't worry, there's time for a redemption arc still !
hux: i’m going to get worse on purpose
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madamejocastanu·:
Once her hand was taken, Jocasta squeezed it gently, and gave the other a reassuring pat against the back of his hand, before letting go. She could sense that he was nervous, anxious to get away, but she did not pry into why he felt that way, rather he would share with her when he was ready to. A small smile on her face, “You say you’re alright, and yet you hesitate, and you’re already thinking of ways to get away from here.” A small friendly chuckle, “And I don’t need the force to know that. It’s quite easy to read on your face, and in your voice. You surely can’t be in that much of a rush, to not allow an old woman to torture you with conversation can you? Besides I’ve found that when you rush, you often miss the best adventures, the fondest memories, and the truest of friends.”
at her words, he freezes, panicking at the rather observant - okay, incredibly observant - comment that comes so casually from her lips. oh. idiot finn. she was a jedi - and a powerful one. she’d definitely just read his mind. force. fuck. she was probably reading his mind like right now. did that mean she knew who he was and what he’d done? oh stars, was she going to kill him for it? sure, she looked completely kind and unassuming, but she was a jedi master - she must have accomplished great deeds to get there. and that probably meant, like, killing a bunch of sith. not that he even was a sith - he certainly hadn’t been, and had no desire to be one now. but still, he’d used the dark side, made a red saber . . . all things the jedi probably definitely wanted to kill him for.
i don’t need the force to know that, she’d said, which provides a split second of relief before the realization that yeah, of course she’d say that if she was reading his mind. “well, that’s maybe why i rush.” he replies, trying to come up with some excuse to leave and their mind going completely blank, as, to be fair, it usually did when in need of urgent excuses. “i try to avoid adventures. and i’m, uh, not big on friends.” he had been, apparently, in another life. did she know that? did she know who they’d been? actually, the better question to ask was probably what didn’t this all-powerful jedi master know?
threeofsabers·:
finn ||| an outer rim port
It’s meant to be a quick stop, a simple pause to refuel between isolated outposts whose criminal overlords could not enforce their rule in the disarray of the galactic comms outage. But as she waits for the tank to fill, a ripple in the Force attracts her attention. Everything else about this stranger indicates they’re just another unimportant smuggler. Yet something about the way the Force flows through them sparks recognition—not defined by the dark, but undeniably touched by it. Traces linger of an aura that they recognize from their brief meeting with Aiya Ren.
“My, my. What a peculiar place to find a Knight of Ren.” A guess, perhaps, but Third is confident that it’s a good one.·
it’s a little embarrassing that they almost look around for who she’s referring in the second it takes to realize oh shit, they mean him. i don’t know what you’re talking about, they nearly say, then catches himself, considering the options. he didn’t recognize their face, which meant one of two things - either they wanted to kill him, or was a friend. really, two options that didn’t narrow down his possible safe responses whatsoever. great.
an uncomfortable silence has settled before he responds, resisting the extremely strong urge to take a step back, then another, then get out of there as fast as possible. “yeah, it would be.” the words aren’t challenging, stated as calmly as he possibly can as dark eyes meet this stranger’s own. “from what i’ve heard, i don’t think any of them would step foot on one of these hunks of junk.” ouch, finn. okay, way to insult her ride. and, like, any other figure on this station, all of whom were likely less than model citizens, considering the reputation of this system.
open starter, @galacticsopens
so perhaps it wasn’t the brightest way to get around, but it was better than dealing with juggling credits around to pay for passage. smuggling herself onto a ship was easy, theoretically. get in a crate, shut up, hold it, and wait until the trip was over, then wait ‘till it got quiet, then sneak out. she was far too familiar with it by now.
so that’s exactly what she was doing. curled up in a little ball in a crate full of random junk on a ship she didn’t know, idly waiting for the ship to get on its way. after all – the girl just woke up!! she had no clue where she was or what she was doing, so she resorted to what she knew. was that so wrong?!
but as the lid of the crate was lifted off, she realized she would have to do a lot of talking to get herself out of this one. a smile spread on her face.
pick an accent, pick a kriffing accent!! ryloth- no- festian- NO- she landed on something vaguely corellian. ❝ you must be looking for this – ❞ she said, holding up whatever random part she grabbed first.
finn had taken the transport job for easy credits - which it had promised to be. a trip with a ship full of refined coaxium to corellia, with a safe route and extremely minimal risk of danger. they’d needed a guard, and with the promise of not having to see combat, finn had agreed. a surprise they’d hired him, considering.
“i’m not.” they respond, eyeing the part she held in her hand. that was probably something worth recognizing, but it went unknown in his eyes. force, he really had to learn ship mechanics. “i was actually checking on-” they stop themselves, realizing.
well, he was about to really get yelled at. probably fired. actually, definitely fired.
“are you a stowaway?” he responds first, instinct. dumb instinct. the next is to grab her arm, pulling her up from the crate. because of course she was a stowaway - why else would she be hiding in a crate.
“don’t answer that. you are. i can tell. i can always tell.” a lie, and not a very convincing one. or maybe it was ? “i have lots of experience dealing with stowaways.”
LOCATION : // … N A L H U T T A
WHO : // … open
anakin looked at the building just across from where he stood feeling disgust and dread bubbling through him. gardulla had lived there and likely had continued to cause havoc for those under her while staying there. hatred bubbled beneath his calm exterior before a snarl crossed his lips and continued to walk along the streets. he’d only come to the damn planet in an attempt to grab some dampeners and maybe a compressor if he could find an undamaged one. finally finding the local bazaar anakin ducked behind the curtain to enter. time to bargain. “how much?” he gestured towards the clump of wires and parts on a nearby table, a compressor sticking out from where it lay hidden inside the clump. as if someone had ripped it from a ships dashboard.
tatooine had been temporary, really. was temporary. as soon as they could get a part fixed, something apparently increasingly difficult as the galactics had exploded into chaos once again. so, he’d stayed for now, among an abundance of sand and heat from twin suns.
“oh, thats not-” they stop themselves, stepping back from the parts-littered crates. “i don’t own this stall.” he’d only been looking for a spare part, something to help the mechanic along - apparently. they barely knew the first thing about ships, let alone ship repair, and thus had struggled - a lot - to find what had been asked, even with the accompanying description. turns out, a lot of things were long and silver.
“you don’t, um,” he hesitates, examining the new stranger before deciding to ask. they didn’t look too mean. “you don’t know what an artesiatic dampener looks like, do you?”
It would seem those with the force wether they knew it or not, were popping up all over the galaxy even in these especially trying times. Jocasta could sense its presence in the other, smiling as she approached. “It is you, the youth of this galaxy I fear for most with these attacks from the Yuuzhan Vong. I am sure they will not be able to win, and freedom shall prosper.” She offered her hand to the other, “I am Jocasta Nu, a Jedi Council Member. Is there anything I can do for you? Especially with the comms down, I know things have been hard on us all.”
@forceordered
he doesn’t recognize the face that approaches him, but the force that surrounds her is immediately comforting - not familiar, but warm nonetheless. he takes her hand, shaking it with calloused grip from years of weapons training, noting her own. at her words, it clicks ( he would not recognize the attire of a jedi ), what she is. a jedi - and a master, and a council member. why is she here ? there is a fear that knaws, a worry of her intent, that they might be brought into the order on demand of the new republic; as kind as all had been, a past and future of conscription still stuck with them. “um,” they hesistate, “thank you.” he doesn’t offer a name, just a small smile. “but i’m sure i’ll be alright.” once i can get off world, and away.
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enjoy the new header . . . yes im in my finnpoe feelings
“Here goes nothing.”
"wait!" he holds out a hand, blocking the woman from leaving her seat next to him, towards the rather dangerous looking crowd. "don't you think you should think this through?" their head swivels back, takes a look at the presumed danger, before turning back. "those guys are pretty scary."
“you were right. you were right about me.” ( to poe, from finn )
Poe really doesn't mean to smile as wide as he does, looking down, teeth grazing against their lip. " Well yeah buddy, I've been known to be right a time or two. " he shrugged in faux bashfulness. But he felt uneasy, off-kilter. This wasn't their Finn, even as much as they wanted it to be. A desperate clawing in his stomach telling him that if he could just remind them... But it couldn't happen. They didn't remember. " If you need anything, you let me know. Got it ? None of these jokers are gonna give you a hard time. Not with me around. I'll tell 'em off. " it felt final as they said it, like this was it, like there's no going back from this. Finn was home and if Poe allowed this to continue, this wishing for everything he'd have before, it would drown them both. " I'm sorry, Finn. For putting my expectations on you.... For all of it. I just missed my friends. " he said honestly, no longer smiling. " You and Rey, you were kind of my world. I just want you to be happy. “
@forceordered
my world. that hits him harder than perhaps anything poe had said, the finality and the meaning behind it a weight on his chest, a significance formerly beyond his understanding. they were friends, companions, he'd been told, heard from person after person. but no, this was something beyond that, a sense of companionship and belonging that finn had never experienced, never believed they could experience; the idea of being so close and so comfortable and so trusting and —
he takes a deep breath, fingernails digging into a calloused palm as they try to slow down the stream of thoughts, of worry, of implication, the sharp pain bringing him back to the moment. but, of course, the moment is poe dameron, standing in front of him looking incredibly vulnerable and a little lost. the expression on his face triggers something in finn, a sudden feeling of protectiveness, of kinship, of understanding, and he almost gasps with the influx, the sudden emotion. he'd heard of being able to touch the feelings of others in the force, but they'd never tried before ( nor here, even though somehow . . . he'd have to ask mara later ), so surrounded by hate and anger and desiring none more - but then again, this place and this person was so vastly different, so vulnerable and open and kind above all.
poe is genuine, he realizes. and fuck, that hurts more than anything, knowing how hard this must be for the other man, seeing finn's face staring so blankly at him, no spark of recognition - and when there was, accompanied by programmed anger.
and here he was, after it all, so self-sacrificing for finn's happiness. i just want you to be happy. no one has cared for finn this deeply before, hurt this deeply for that feeling. and they're not sure what to say to make it right, to fix it all - because if they could, he would.
"it's not your fault." he starts, haltingly. "don't apologize. you just wanted your friend." he smiles small, apologetically on his own end. "you couldn't have known."
he hesitates a moment, finally looking up at poe, dark eyes meeting dark eyes. "could you, um," they pause, brushing past worry, "what was i like? when you knew me?"
This situation felt very familiar, Poe thought, as they ran down the hallway. Finn, in a coma in a medbay. Poe, trying to balance handling disaster and worry at the same time. Now at least, he had bb-8 waiting for the announcement that his friend was okay. “ Finn ? “ Now that he’s here, he’s not quite sure he belongs. “ Are you alright, buddy ? “ He came as soon as he could, but he doesn’t say that.
@forceordered
he knows the figure from voice alone, more than one encounter - and time spent wondering after as to the future, or present, that he’d once had - familiarizing the commander in his mind. poe. they’d been close, once, or he’d been told - best friends. finn had never had a best friend, and the closest he’d come had died on jakku the same day he’d come to this time.
“not really.” the words are humorous, spoken through exhausted lips, the toil of the event still weighing heavy - and painful. bacta had done what it could, but the shortage meant they’d have to make most of the recovery themselves. fine. he’d handled worse. or, at least, he apparently had. “i’ll live, though.”
he pauses, considering, weighing his next words. “tell your republic thank you.” but i won’t join them left unsaid, hesitation preventing the words.
“It only takes one to sound the alarm.”
“i know.” the former trooper mutters, peeking out from their hiding place at the rows of tie fighters glistening in the hangar. when he’d left the first order, he hadn’t quite expected to be back so quick - especially not doing this now, heisting with a practical stranger for a less than ideal amount of credits ( or, what he assumed was being underpaid - they’d really never done this before ). “i used to -” they catch themselves, correcting with a nervous glance at his companion. “i used to study their plans.”
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“If you will not be turned, you will be destroyed!”
"you know, i'm fine with that." the boldness blurts from him before they can reconsider, rethink the words. "i've heard you tried once, and it didn't work out." you were my friend, dameron had said. so he'd escaped - left ? - and joined the resistance. been successful enough to make friends with several of their commanders, if those who had already approached him ( dameron and that dathomiran) were to be believed. "i'll take my chances." the bravery was unnatural, unknown - but shit, it felt wonderful, standing up to the ginger general ilke this.
eldra says : “yes, i assure you, we're quite safe from your friends here.”
"my friends?" question and confusion washes across his features before understanding fills them, along with the tired shake of a head. stars, he never thought he'd miss the days when a plastoid white helmet concealed any sign of his identity. "i'm not with any side. not anymore." the saber at their hip probably signaled otherwise - as did the legacy they seemed to have left behind in another future. "so, uh, thanks." he may have left the first order ( imperial remnant ? he was never sure what to call them in this time ), but that didn't mean he wanted a reunion with the republic or rebellion.
