Get Your Filthy Hands Off My Books

TANTOO CARDINAL // have you met JOCASTA NU yet? SHE is now SEVENTY-SEVEN years old TRANS WOMAN HUMAN, originally from CORUSCANT but typically reside on YAVIN IV. after everything they’ve gone through, they show loyalty to THE JEDI ORDER. they are best known for being a/an JEDI COUNCIL MEMBER/CHIEF ARCHIVIST, and i hear they’re grown pretty WISE yet also HAUGHTY at times; i hope they survive the galactic war. (Devin, 23, EST, He/Him/His)

“Obi-Wan, would you care to join me for the walk around the temple’s edge amongst the trees? I have been reflecting on a matter, and I think your thoughts would be invaluable.” 

depa wasn’t really the partying type, but she took the occasional day off — more than that, she knew when her friends could use one. jocasta put so much time & energy into the order. maybe something entirely new was what she needed ! ( & besides, depa had a small fondness for the races. but she would keep that to herself. )

she raised her brows slightly at her companion’s words, a small smile tugging on her lips. “it doesn’t need to change the fate of anything, jocasta. it’s simply a race, just for the fun of it. though i do believe that some of the people are here for political or business dealings.” politicians had always appreciated parties, perhaps more than they should.

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kanan nodded his head as master nu echoed his words, though the conclusion wasn’t one that he had drawn on his own –– he had been so young when the order had fallen and there were still many, many things that he had left to learn ( that he’d perhaps never had the opportunity to learn ). he took a breath, considering the weight of her words. “it’s hard to feel like we were being ambivalent, with all that we were doing.” he, and many others his age, had nearly been raised as soldiers before being jedi. it’s an exaggeration, but not a huge one. at least master nu did not agree with the position that bendu had taken, which was a relief. he knew that he wasn’t a soldier, that it wasn’t the role of a jedi, but… he couldn’t just ignore the fight, either. “he never saw it that way. i– i don’t know what happened to him, or if he’s still there now. maybe it’d be worth checking at some point, but there’s no shortage of other things to worry about right now.”

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“Depa, I didn’t realize so many people would be here. Is this race really that important? The fathier just go around in a circle, or more like an oval, but still, I can’t imagine this race actually changes the fate of anything.” 

“Oh, pardon me, is there anything I can do for you?” 

“Bastila, I have a very important question for you.” 

the vote of confidence was appreciated, more needed than what kanan could properly express with his own words, swallowing down whatever bits of nerves remained and giving a nod of his head in response. they would figure it out because they needed to. because eh could not imagine another way forward through this mess yet, and he was not willing to give up on it. if it meant going back to atollon, or to… somewhere, anywhere where he’d be able to figure it out, then he would do exactly that. whatever he could contribute to this, he would. there were other roles, roles beyond fighting, but accepting that felt akin to giving up.

“i…” in a rare feat, kanan found himself to be rather speechless at all the information that master nu knew. he wished that he had brought it up sooner, for a moment, though he had not seen any reason to before. he didn’t know if bendu was even still there. he swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry, as he collected his own thoughts on the matter. “well, it fits. some of it, at least. he was powerful but… ambivalent to the problems of the universe. he’d rather destroy both sides of a battle than take a side.” maybe she could find the wisdom in that, but he could not.

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“This peace sumit between Mon Mothma and Rae Sloane, do we think anything will come of it, and should a Jedi be present? As keepers of the peace, it would be a great time to take back our role as negotiators. Obviously, Sloane will not be trustful of any Jedi, but as a member of the Empire, it would be wise for us to be wary of her. Who is to tell what type of person she is, what her goals are.” 

“i’m sorry, i haven’t.” she frowns, shaking her head small. “i know of voids in the force, like these felt …” the jedi trails off, thinking back. after arrival to this time, she’d attempted to learn of the fates of those close to her - atris, the dantooine enclave, the ebon hawk crew - and in the process, learned of revan’s fate ( and disappearance, shortly after her last memories from that time ). “the sith emperor, once, could create places and people that could not be felt in the force. that’s the closest thing i can recall.”

“i’m sorry i couldn’t be more help, master nu.” brow furrows as she tries to think, recalling anything that might be helpful. she’d certainly never encountered these creatures before - she would have remembered if she had, certainly. as she goes to clasp jocasta’s hand back, her hands instead fly to her mouth as a long-forgotten memory claws to the surface. “wait. there was this story that mission loved, that canderous used to tell.” she searches for the details, struggling to recall. “about this unknown ship that melted beskar. i don’t know what ever came of it, but …” she glances up, worrying at her lower lip. “i could ask.”

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   Jocasta listened intently, anything Bastila had to offer would prove of value, she was sure of that. Jocasta also had never thought she would find herself in a position where she would be able to speak to Bastila Shan. So any moment she got with her, she would certainly treasure. “The Sith Emperor, yes! Oh what was his name, Vitalian? Correct?” She truthfully was not as informed on the Sith as she would have liked, in her time they were never a threat, not until the very end of her life. She had much to catch up by then, and not enough time to do her own research while helping the Order navigate those times. 

at her words, he freezes, panicking at the rather observant - okay, incredibly observant - comment that comes so casually from her lips. oh. idiot finn. she was a jedi - and a powerful one. she’d definitely just read his mind. force. fuck. she was probably reading his mind like right now. did that mean she knew who he was and what he’d done? oh stars, was she going to kill him for it? sure, she looked completely kind and unassuming, but she was a jedi master - she must have accomplished great deeds to get there. and that probably meant, like, killing a bunch of sith. not that he even was a sith - he certainly hadn’t been, and had no desire to be one now. but still, he’d used the dark side, made a red saber … all things the jedi probably definitely wanted to kill him for. 

i don’t need the force to know that, she’d said, which provides a split second of relief before the realization that yeah, of course she’d say that if she was reading his mind. “well, that’s maybe why i rush.” he replies, trying to come up with some excuse to leave and their mind going completely blank, as, to be fair, it usually did when in need of urgent excuses. “i try to avoid adventures. and i’m, uh, not big on friends.” he had been, apparently, in another life. did she know that? did she know who they’d been? actually, the better question to ask was probably what didn’t this all-powerful jedi master know?

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   Jocasta chuckled a little, before she smiled at the other, the worry radiating off of them was palpable. So much so that it was forcing her to pick up on it. Still she did not feel that their worry came from a place of wanting to hurt her, but rather that she would hurt them. Of course, Jocasta had no such intentions of that, but this poor soul had no way of truly knowing that, and it quite certainly showed with this reaction. 

   "I would hardly call the last person standing for their cause a fool, especially if they've lasted longer than all the others. That is what I call bravery."

   "I would hardly call your nature evil, Trilla. Rather you have overcome great trials and tribulations you never should have been put through. In the end of it all, you will be a stronger person then you could have ever imagined. You will always have my support as long as you walk your path."

   "I suppose the overcoming of one's evil nature teaches us a great many lessons in life. However, I pose this question in turn, is it better to overcome your evil, or is it better to have resisted the temptation of darkness all your life despite its never ending siren songs?"

at jocasta’s approach, she immediately straightens ( barely perceptible, her own posture already near perfect from a childhood of scolding on slouching ), hands brushing at the fabric of her robes, smoothing the wrinkles. master nu was the oldest, and thus most experienced, member of the order as it currently stood - and not to mention she was on the council. bastila may have had conflicting feelings towards the subgroup, but the position demanded respect regardless of personal inclinations; she would present her best, then.

at jocasta’s words, she bites her tongue, choosing words with care and precision, both for respect and herself - there was much she did not want to say, nor had said to many ( or, any but one ). “i appreciate your concern, master nu.” she doesn’t bother to correct jocasta’s address - despite her state as the eldest displaced by timeline, and the deeds she had accomplished there, bastila was no jedi master - and instead smiles politely with the response. “it’s been a hard time for us all, but i was lucky enough to be relatively uninjured by the events at hapes.” she keeps it vague, polite, formal - no need to mention what had happened during hapes, or how it had sunk its claws into her and refused to let her forget in the weeks after.

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kanan was proud of ezra, though he always thought of it in terms of being proud of him and the man that he had become, rather than the work that he had done as his master. his padawan had perhaps turned out a little too similar to him, based on what he had learned. “master billaba believes that there may bea way to learn to sense them based on what’s not there.” easier said than done – any room, at any time, was filled with nonliving objects. but he had learned how to navigate that. this was taking it a step further. “there was a creature on atollon that called itself bendu. it was ancient, and immensely powerful with the force. he guided me on how to expand my trust in the force and use it to let me see. it could be possible to continue to do that.”

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   Jocasta’s hand gently rested against her chin, listening to Kanan as he explained her theory in how to exploit their lack of presence in the force, the void that they left. It would be difficult, but Kanan had overcome so much, that if anyone could do it it would be him. “I have faith that you can be able to master this theory of her’s. I will search the archives that we have to see if there is anything I can find to help you with this endeavor.” She let out a small sigh, if she had access to her old archives, there were so many more books that would have helped Kanan, that she simply no longer had access to. Though when she heard him speak next, she rose an eyebrow.